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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28178427">A Bambina or Bambino of Our Own</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/musicgirl1120/pseuds/musicgirl1120'>musicgirl1120</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Grey's Anatomy, Station 19 (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anxiety, Established Relationship, F/F, Family, Parenthood, Trying For A Baby</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 20:34:14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>97,917</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28178427</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/musicgirl1120/pseuds/musicgirl1120</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Maya and Carina have been in a happy relationship for three years, and since the beginning, they both said they never wanted kids.  But now, both of them find themselves seeing things a little differently.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Maya Bishop &amp; Carina DeLuca, Maya Bishop/Carina DeLuca</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>140</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>812</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Safe Surrender</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was the middle of the night during a relatively quiet shift.  They had a few small calls during the day, but none since they got back to the station around 9, meaning everyone was sleeping, or almost everyone.  </p><p>Maya was wide awake in her office, working on paperwork.  She struggled with insomnia when she was completely relaxed and at home wrapped in Carina’s arms, and she genuinely couldn’t remember the last time she slept on shift when she wasn’t fighting some illness.  She looked over the file she had just finished, soft music playing in her office.  </p><p>Just as she turned to grab a binder off her shelf, she heard a knock on her office door.  </p><p>“Come in?” she called, confused and slightly worried as to why anyone in their right mind would be awake at 3 am.</p><p> She thought her whole team was asleep.  She got up, opening the door and instead of finding someone from her team, she looked down, seeing a box filled with blankets.  </p><p>She bent down, moving one of the blankets and revealing a very tiny, very new baby.  Maya immediately scooped the baby up into her arms as it started to cry.  </p><p>“Shhh,” Maya said, holding the baby close as she swayed a little.  </p><p>The tiny human settled in her arms almost instantly.  Maya went to her desk, still rocking the baby a little as she called child services.  </p><p>“Hello,” a voice on the other end of the phone said, “Seattle Department of Children and Family Services.”  </p><p>“Hi,” Maya said, “This is Captain Maya Bishop at Fire Station 19.  We just had a safe surrender baby dropped off.”  </p><p>“Alright,” the woman on the other end said, clearly typing, “Do you have an approximate age and gender of the baby?”  </p><p>“It’s new,” Maya said, cradling the phone on her ear as she moved the blanket around the baby, to get a better look “The umbilical stump is still attached and looks fairly fresh. I’d say no more than 4 days old.  And it’s a girl.  She seems pretty small, but her color is good and she’s acting like a newborn.”  </p><p>“Alright,” the woman said, “Well, it has been a very busy night.  I will put you on the list, but it will probably be at least 6 hours before someone can come down there.  Is that alright?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, sighing, “Just as soon as they can.” </p><p>Maya hung up, looking down at the tiny baby in her arms.  She wasn’t good with babies.  She avoided ones this small at all costs, but for now, this baby was 100% her responsibility unless she woke someone else up, but on a night they were actually getting sleep, she was nit going to do that.  </p><p>She went out to the barn, grabbing a med kit and giving the baby a quick exam.  It appeared the newborn was healthy.  </p><p>Maya then went up to the beanery, grabbing a premixed bottle of formula they kept for these occasions, heating it in some warm water.  She sat at the table, feeding the clearly hungry little girl.  </p><p>Once the baby had eaten and been burped, Maya headed back down to her office.  She wasn’t totally sure what to do.  The child in her arms was wide awake and staring at her. </p><p> “So, you have insomnia too?” Maya said, smiling down at the baby, “I’m sorry.  It really is the worst.  What can I do for you?”  </p><p>The baby just blinked at Maya.  </p><p>“Alright,” the blonde said, raising an eyebrow, “Well, I am going to work on more paperwork.”  </p><p>Maya kept working, shifting the little warm bundle in her arms every few minutes.  After about an hour, the baby started crying.  </p><p>“Damn it,” Maya said, realizing the baby needed a diaper change, “Alright.  Let’s do this.”  </p><p>Maya had a little experience with diapers thanks to Amelia’s now almost three year old son Scout who she and Carina watched from time to time.  Quickly, the blonde changed the diaper, the baby crying the entire time.  </p><p>“It’s ok,” Maya said, scooping the red faced infant into her arms, “That’s done.”  </p><p>The baby continued to cry and Maya got up, pacing the floor, bouncing the tiny baby a little.  </p><p>“Hey, you don’t need to do this,” Maya said, rubbing the baby’s back, “Just go to sleep.  I’m sure you’re tired.”  </p><p>The baby continued to fuss.  Maya racked her brain, trying to remember what little she knew about babies.  </p><p>Suddenly, she got an idea.  She had gone to visit Carina one day at work and had found her wife in the NICU, holding a small baby on her chest, skin to skin.  </p><p>Apparently, the baby had been abandoned and was struggling in the NICU.  Carina had some connection to the little boy, maybe because the baby’s mother abandoned him just like her own mother had done when she was young.  </p><p>One of the nurses had offered to let Carina do kangaroo care with the baby and it had worked wonders, helping to stabilize his oxygen within minutes.  It had something to do with feeling safe and connected that Maya couldn’t quite remember.</p><p> Maya knew this little girl wasn’t sick, but also that she had been through a lot in the past few hours so the fire captain sat down in her chair, carefully maneuvering the baby so she was on her chest, covered in the blanket she had been left with.  The baby calmed quickly, eyes drooping closed within five minutes.  </p><p>Maya smiled, surprised at how natural it felt to have this little girl sleeping on her.  She had been so against having babies for most of her life because of her own childhood.  She and Carina had talked a little about it too, early in their relationship, and the Italian had the same thoughts, babies were not in her future.  </p><p>However, as they had started spending more and more time with Carina’s friend’s kids, little Pru, and Andy and Robert’s son Luca who was now nearing a year old, Maya found herself thinking that maybe it wasn’t all bad, maybe it would be possible to have a kid and not utterly fuck them up the way both she and Carina had been as young children.  </p><p>Now that they had been happily married for almost six months, Maya found herself thinking about babies more than she ever though she would, seriously thinking she might want one of her own.</p><p> The fire captain realized that now, with a sleeping baby on her chest, there was no way she could continue working.  She grabbed her phone, seeing it was already nearing 5 am.  Maya leaned back into her chair, just relaxing.  She never really fell asleep, but she just sat there, feeling her entire body relax as the baby rubbed her head against her chest.  </p><p>The two of them spent the next hour cuddled up before the little girl decided she was hungry again.  She started rooting around, looking for milk.  </p><p>“I don’t have what you are looking for,” Maya said, looking down at the baby, “But I will go get you some.”  </p><p>Maya moved the baby, rebuttoning her shirt before going up to the beanery.  It was still early, and no one else was up.  Maya grabbed a bottle, warming it a little.  As it was getting warm, Maya changed the baby’s diaper again, quickly flicking on the coffee maker before grabbing the bottle, popping it in the restless baby’s mouth.  She grabbed a cup of coffee before heading back to her office.  </p><p>Once the baby had finished eating, and Maya changed another diaper because she needed it, the little girl started fussing again. </p><p> “Alright,” Maya said, sitting down, “Fine.  I will hold you how you want.”  </p><p>Maya settle the baby back against her chest.  Maya grabbed her phone as the tiny human on her chest let out a little sigh as she nuzzled against the fire captain.  Maya smiled, going on Instagram and just scrolling because what else was she supposed to do with a newborn asleep in her shirt.  </p><p>About an hour after the baby fell asleep, there was a knock on her door. </p><p> “Come in,” she called softly, not wanting to wake the baby.  </p><p>“Buongiorno Bella,” Carina said, walking in with two cups of coffee and a bag that almost assuredly contained breakfast sandwiches, “What is going on?  What are you holding?” </p><p> “A baby,” Maya said, moving the blanket a little to reveal the tiny baby on her chest, “We got a safe surrender last night and no one could come get her so I’ve been hanging with her since about 3 am.” </p><p> “She is so little,” Carina said, walking over to Maya, setting the items she brought on the desk, looking at the baby who was sleeping on Maya, “Do you know how old she is?”  </p><p>“Umbilical stump is fresh,” Maya said, “Not more than a few days.”  </p><p>“How did she end up in your shirt?” Carina asked, noticing the position.  </p><p>“She was crying,” Maya said, “And I couldn’t calm her down, but then I remember you doing this with the baby in the NICU, and she settled almost instantly.” </p><p> “She must really like you,” Carina said, smiling as she watched Maya look down at the baby.  </p><p>Maya shrugged, looking back at Carina.  Before they could say anything else, there was another knock at the door. </p><p> “Hey Cap,” Andy said before seeing the scene before her, “Whoa, what is going on in here?  Where did the baby come from?”  </p><p>“Safe surrender,” Maya said, “In the middle of the night.  I’m just waiting for the social worker.”  </p><p>“This is the cutest thing I have seen in a long time,” Andy said, grabbing her phone, “You three would make the cutest little family.”  </p><p>“Andy,” Maya complained as her lieutenant snapped a picture, “Did you need something or did you just come down here to bother me?”  </p><p>“Just coming to tell you breakfast was ready,” Andy said, smiling as she looked at the picture, “But it seems like you have that covered.  You three really do look cute together.  I’m just throwing it out there, Luca would love a playmate.”  </p><p>“Goodbye lieutenant,” Maya said as Andy walked out the door, laughing a little.  </p><p>“You really are good with her,” Carina said, gesturing to the sleeping baby, “And you do look cute together.”  </p><p>“I’ve been thinking,” Maya said as Carina pulled out the breakfast sandwiches, “Not just last night with this baby, but for a while now, about having kids.  And I know you said you didn’t want to and I know I did too, but I don’t know.  I don’t think it’s the worst idea in the world anymore.  Actually, I think it’s the opposite of that, and I totally understand if you don’t want to, but I just think…” </p><p> “I have been thinking about it too,” Carina said, stopping Maya’s ramblings, “And I think I have changed my mind.”  </p><p>“Really?” Maya said, looking at Carina, “You really think we could have a baby?”  </p><p>“I think that we could,” Carina said, nodding, “Bailey once said that when two people have so much love that they cannot contain it between the two of them, that is when they have a baby, and Maya, I love you so much.”  </p><p>“I love you too,” Maya said, feeling a small tear prick the corner of her eye, “But what about everything you were afraid of?”  </p><p>“Well, I think we have both shown each other that we are not our parents,” Carina said, brushing a piece of hair off Maya’s face, “And I am still afraid of passing on my genetics, but there are ways around that.  We could adopt or use an egg donor or use your eggs.”  </p><p>“You have been thinking about this a lot,” Maya said, smiling.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, biting her lip, “Since before the wedding.” </p><p> “Me too,” Maya said, nodding, “I think since seeing Andy with Luca.  I don’t know.  Are we really going to do this?  Have a baby I mean?”  </p><p>“I want to,” Carina said, bending down to kiss Maya.  </p><p>“Good,” Maya said, pulling back a little, “Because I want to too.” </p><p> Maya kissed Carina again, and then there was another knock at the door.  </p><p>“Come in,” Maya called as Carina pulled away.  </p><p>“Hello,” a woman said, walking in, “My name is Felicity James from Department of Children and Family Services.  I got a call about a safe surrender last night.”  </p><p>“Yes,” Maya said, carefully moving the baby out of her shirt, “Here she is.  She was having a hard time calming down so I did some skin to skin.” </p><p> “Good thinking,” Felicity said as Maya handed her the baby, “Wow.  She is really small.”  </p><p>“I fed her about two hours ago,” Maya said, looking at the baby who was stirring in the social worker’s arms, “She has mostly just been sleeping.  I checked her out, and she seems healthy.”  </p><p>“Good,” Felicity said, “Well, I have a foster home who has been waiting for a baby just like this one, so I am going to go call them.  Did she have anything with her when she was dropped off?”  </p><p>“Just this box,” Maya said, handing the small box the baby had been in to the social worker.  </p><p>“Thank you for taking care of her all night,” Felicity said, “It seems like she really liked you.”  </p><p>“She was sweet,” Maya said, nodding as the woman and baby left the fire house.  </p><p>Maya then turned back to Carina.  </p><p>“I can’t believe we are actually going to try to have one of those,” Maya said, walking over to her wife and hugging her. </p><p> “Si,” Carina said, hugging Maya back, “A bambino or bambina of our own.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Beginning</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A month later, Maya and Carina were sitting in a fertility specialist office.  They had gone over all their options about a million times and decided they were going to try to do reciprocal IVF, meaning Maya would undergo fertility treatments and have her eggs harvested, they would be inseminated by a sperm donor they would choose, and then the embryos would be implanted in Carina.  </p><p>They decided this because of Carina’s fears about passing bipolar disorder on to their children, but it would be much easier for Carina to be pregnant than Maya with their work lives.  They also were toying with the idea of adoption and thought they would adopt at some point, but they wanted to try this first.  </p><p>“Alright,” their fertility doctor, Dr. Elizabeth Howard said, coming into the room, </p><p>“Well, Maya, your numbers look good and your ultrasound was perfect so on the first day of your next period, you need to call the office, and we will send the prescription to the pharmacy.  You will then do injections for some time between 8 and 14 days.  At that point, you will have to come in every other day until you are ready for retrieval.  After that, we will inseminate the eggs with the sperm, and let them grow for five to six days.  Then we will freeze them until Carina is ready for the transfer. Any questions?”  </p><p>“I don’t think so,” Maya said, shaking her head as she looked at Carina.  </p><p>“I do not,” Carina said, agreeing with Maya.  </p><p>The Italian woman had some experience with how IVF worked because of patients she had had who had been through it.  </p><p>“Alright,” Dr. Howard said, “Well, I will talk to you both soon.  Remember, Maya, call as soon as you start your period.”  </p><p>“Will do,” Maya said, nodding as they left the office.  </p><p>They walked out to the car, Maya climbing in the driver’s seat. </p><p> “I can’t believe we are really doing this,” Maya said, looking over at Carina.  </p><p>“Are you having second thoughts?” Carina asked, worry filling her voice.  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, “No, not at all.  I’m excited.  Why?  Are you?”  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, “No.  I am sure, excited too.”  </p><p>Nine days later as they were getting ready for bed, Maya felt the familiar cramping she always got in her belly right before she started her period. </p><p> “I think tomorrow’s gonna be the day,” she said, climbing into bed next to her wife.  </p><p>“Cosa?” Carina asked, not sure what the blonde was talking about. </p><p> “Tomorrow, I am going to start the injections,” Maya said, “I’m cramping which means I’m going to start tomorrow.” </p><p> “I almost forgot,” Carina said, smiling.  </p><p>“I don’t think I have ever been this excited to start my period before in my life,” Maya said.  </p><p>“Are you sure you are going to be able to give yourself the shots?” Carina asked as they both leaned down in bed, “Because we are on opposite schedules for the next week.”  </p><p>“I’ll be fine,” Maya said, nodding, “And if I can’t, I’ll make Andy or Vic help me out.”  </p><p>“I wish I could be there to help,” Carina said, brushing a piece of hair off Maya’s forehead.  </p><p>“It’ll be fine,” Maya said, kissing her wife gently, “Now, let’s get some sleep.”  </p><p>The next day, just as Maya predicted, she started her period, calling her doctor and getting the prescriptions sent to the pharmacy.  She ran to pick them up during some downtime at work.  </p><p>Once she had the bottles, she realized they had to be refrigerated.  She hadn’t really told anyone on her team what she and Carina were doing except Andy, mostly because it just seemed like something very private, but they were all going to see her box of drugs in the communal fridge.  </p><p>She sighed, heading upstairs.  She ran into Andy on her way into the beanery. </p><p> “What’s in the box?” the lieutenant asked.  </p><p>“My IVF meds,” Maya said, biting her lip, “And they have to be refrigerated.  And I have to give myself an injection later today.”  </p><p>“That’s so exciting,” Andy said, big smile covering her face.  </p><p>“What’s exciting?” Vic asked, walking into the beanery.  </p><p>“Well, I guess it’s time to tell people,” Maya said, sighing, “Carina and I decided to try for a baby, and I have to start injections today to make that happen.”  </p><p>“Are you serious?” Vic asked, eyes wide, “You are going to be a mom?”  </p><p>“If this whole thing works out,” Maya said, nodding.  </p><p>“Oh my gosh, congratulations,” Vic said, giving Maya a small hug. </p><p> “Why are we hugging?” Travis asked as he and Ben walked into the beanery.  </p><p>“Maya’s gonna be a mom,” Vic said. </p><p> “What?” Travis said, jaw dropping, “When?”  </p><p>“I don’t know,” Maya said, “I am starting the injections today.”  </p><p>“Congratulations,” Ben said, smiling, “So we are going to be down a captain for the next, what, year?”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, shaking her head, “No.  Carina is going to carry the baby.  It’s easier for her to work while pregnant, but we are using my eggs.” </p><p> “Your eggs for what?” Gibson asked as he walked in, “And why do you have special eggs?”  </p><p>“Because they come out of my ovaries,” Maya said, raising an eyebrow.</p><p>  “What did we just walk into?” Dean asked, looking around.  </p><p>“Is it party time in the beanery right now?” Maya asked, “Don’t you all have jobs?  Carina and I are trying to have a baby and we are using my eggs and her uterus and does anyone have any other questions?”  </p><p>Everyone looked around, not saying anything.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, dropping her captain voice as she smiled, “You can all do your weird excited thing now.” </p><p>“Congratulations,” everyone said at various times, offering her a pat on the back and hugs. </p><p> Once they had all disbanded, Maya headed down to her office, smiling as she saw the text from Carina telling her good luck with her injection later.  They got called out pretty quickly after that, working a fire for a few hours.  </p><p>When they got back, Maya headed to her office, surprised to see Carina sitting there waiting for her.  </p><p>“What are you doing here?” Maya asked, “Don’t you work?”  </p><p>“Not until 7,” Carina said, “I thought I would stop by and bring you a coffee and help you with your first shot.”  </p><p>“You’re the best,” Maya said, giving Carina a kiss.  </p><p>“You stink,” Carina said, wrinkling her nose. </p><p> “Fires do that,” Maya said, “Do I have time to shower?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding.  </p><p>“I’ll be fast,” Maya said, running upstairs.  </p><p>She showered, grabbing one of the vials out of the fridge before going back downstairs.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, “Let’s do this.”  </p><p>“In here,” Carina said, guiding Maya into her bunk, “Do you have the syringes?” </p><p> “Yeah,” Maya said, grabbing one out of her desk drawer.  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, drawing up the medicine, “Now pull down your pants a little.  The hip is the best place for this.” </p><p> Maya nodded, shivering a little as Carina wiped her hip with an alcohol swab. </p><p> “Three, two, one,” Carina said, sticking the needle in, pushing the plunger, “And done.  How was it?”  </p><p>“Not bad,” Maya said, pulling her pants back up, “Thanks for coming and doing that.”</p><p>  “Of course,” Carina said, wrapping her arms around Maya, “I want to be here for you as much as I can.  I do, however, need to go to work now.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, stealing a few tender kisses before letting Carina go.  </p><p>The next few days were rough for Maya to say the least.  For starters, she had to give herself the injections because they just couldn’t get their schedules to work out for Carina to help.  </p><p>Also, their doctor had told them about possible side effects, and Maya seemed to be getting them all.  Her stomach churned all day long with nausea, she was overly irritable, she had hot flashes that made her miserable, her boobs hurt so much that when she wasn’t at work, she walked around completely topless, her stomach was starting to get bloated to the point that she was struggling to button her pants, and she was so tired she actually fell asleep at her desk one day.  Miserable didn’t even cover how bad she was feeling by the next time she and Carina had the day off together, seven days after she started the meds.  </p><p>“How about some soup?” Carina offered as Maya laid on the couch topless, “Or I can go get some ginger ale?  It might help with the nausea.”  </p><p>“I’m alright,” Maya said, “I just need to lay here and let my stomach settle.” </p><p> The blonde has spent the past twenty minutes throwing up in the bathroom, Carina sitting with her the entire time.  </p><p>“I do not know how women do this for nine months,” Maya said as Carina handed her a cool cloth.  </p><p>“It is not like this the whole time,” Carina said, shaking her head, “How have you been working like this?”  </p><p>“It gets worse every day,” Maya said, “That was the first time the nausea got bad enough that I threw up.  I am really hoping that at my appointment tomorrow, they say I can take the trigger shot and be done.”  </p><p>“Me too Bella,” Carina said, sitting down with her wife, kissing her temple.  </p><p>They spent the rest of the night curled up on the couch together, Carina managing to get some chicken broth in Maya with little complaints.</p><p>  “I just feel so gross,” Maya said as Carina put her hands on Maya’s belly, massaging it gently.  </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Carina said, pressing a kiss behind Maya’s ear, “You are really bloated.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, “I sat in my office with my pants unbuttoned all of last shift.” </p><p> “You have to work tomorrow after your appointment right?” Carina asked.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said sleepily, “I feel bad for my team.  I am an emotional mess and they are taking most of it.” </p><p> “It’s a good thing you are normally such a good captain,” Carina said, “Now, let’s get you into bed because you need to sleep.”  </p><p>They went into the bedroom, Maya falling asleep quickly.  Sleep, however, did not last as a hot flash woke her up around 11 pm, and the nausea woke her up at 1.  She luckily didn’t throw up again, but it was bad.  Carina woke up when she felt Maya sit up in bed, turning on the light as she herself sat up. </p><p> “What’s wrong Bambina?” Carina asked.  </p><p>“Nauseous,” Maya said, tears filling her eyes against her will.  </p><p>“Do you need me to get you anything?”  Carina asked, putting an arm around Maya.  </p><p>“Don’t touch me,” Maya snapped.  </p><p>Carina quickly pulled her hand back, looking hurt.  </p><p>“Sorry,” Maya said, “Sorry.  I didn’t mean to snap.  I’m just really hot  and feeling really sick right now.”  </p><p>“How about a cool cloth?” Carina asked, already moving to get up.  </p><p>Carina came back a few minutes later with a bowl of water and a few wash clothes.  She carefully put one on Maya’s forehead before using another to gently wipe down her neck and arms.  </p><p>“Thank you,” Maya said as the nausea slowly started to dissipate to the more manageable level it had been all week.  </p><p>“Of course,” Carina said, “So long as you repay the favor when this baby is making me feel like garbage.” </p><p> “Of course, I will,” Maya said, nodding.  </p><p>After another few minutes of cooling Maya off, both of them went back to sleep, luckily staying that way for the rest of the night.  </p><p>Maya got up at 5:30, going for her run.  By the time she got back at 6:15, she was feeling really bad again and barely made it to the guest bathroom right by the door before she started throwing up.  That’s where Carina found her ten minutes later when she came downstairs to make the coffee.  </p><p>“Oh Bambina,” the doctor said, coming into the bathroom, “Were you sick again?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said as she reached for Carina’s hand, getting up off the floor, “I barely made it through my run.”  </p><p>“Maybe you should take a break from running?” Carina suggested, earning a look from Maya, “Ok.  Maybe not.”  </p><p>“I need to shower,” Maya said, “My appointment is at 7:15.”  </p><p>“I will go get breakfast started,” Carina said, “How does dry toast sound?”  </p><p>“Heavenly,” Maya said sarcastically, “But also probably like I would be able to keep it down.”  </p><p>“Go shower,” Carina said, giving Maya a quick kiss on the cheek.  </p><p>Within forty minutes, they were in the car, driving to Grey Sloan where their appointment was.  </p><p>“Alright,” Dr. Howard said, coming in, “How are things going?”  </p><p>“Not exceptionally well,” Maya said, “I feel like crap.”  </p><p>“You’ve been having some side effects?” Dr. Howard asked as she got the ultrasound wand ready, “Oh, I can see you are quite bloated.” </p><p> “Yeah,” Maya said, “And nauseous to the point that I am throwing up, and tired, and moody, and having terrible hot flashes.”  </p><p>“I’m sorry it’s been so rough,” Dr. Howard said, putting some of the jelly on Maya’s abdomen, focusing it on her ovaries, “Well, it looks like you have a number of follicles in the left, and also in the right, but, yeah, that’s what I thought.” </p><p> “Is that extra fluid around the ovaries?” Carina asked, looking at the scan.  </p><p>“Yes,” Dr. Howard said, “It appears you have what is called Ovarian Hyperstimulation.  It’s causing fluid to leak into your abdomen.  It’s not usually a big deal, but your case is bad enough that I want you to rest until the retrieval.”  </p><p>“What do you mean rest?” Maya asked, sitting up as she wiped the gel off her bloated belly.  </p><p>“I mean no overexertion,” Dr. Howard said, “And probably no work.  I know you are a firefighter and that is a pretty demanding job.  Take the next few days off and rest.”</p><p>  “When will the retrieval be?” Maya asked, internally groaning at the thought of not being able to work.  </p><p>“I want to see you back in two days,” Dr. Howard said, “And we will reassess then.  Continue with the shots and rest, and call if you start having an excessive amount of bloating.  Oh, and you need to be drinking electrolyte stabilizing drinks so lots of Gatorade or Pedialyte.  Any questions?”  </p><p>“What happens if I don’t take off work?” Maya asked. </p><p> “Ignore that question,” Carina said, shooting Maya a look, “Thank you Dr. Howard.  See you in two days.”  </p><p>“See you both soon,” Dr. Howard said, leaving. </p><p> “What was that?” Carina asked, looking at Maya.  </p><p>“What?” Maya said, standing up and groaning as she struggled to button her pants, “I am trying to save my PTO for when the baby is here.”  </p><p>“You have sick days,” Carina said, “And right now, you are sick.  OHSS can become serious if you are not careful.  You are going to rest.” </p><p> “Fine,” Maya mumbled, “Can we stop by the station though on our way home?  I need to grab my paperwork and talk to my team.”  </p><p>“Sure,” Carina said, nodding.  </p><p>It was Carina’s day off, and her only plans were to catch up on paperwork so a pit stop at the station didn’t bother her at all.  They drove the short distance to the station, both of them heading inside.  Carina helped Maya get the paperwork she needed before they headed up to the beanery.  </p><p>“What’s going on Captain?” Vic asked when Maya walked into the beanery in her street clothes, “Is everything ok?” </p><p> “It will be,” Maya said, nodding, “But I am having some minor complications from the fertility medication, and I need to take a few days off.  I’m completely fine, but my doctor has ordered me to rest.  While I’m gone, Herrera and Miller are in charge.”  </p><p>Everyone nodded.  </p><p>“I will be back in less than a week,” Maya said, “Try not to do anything too dangerous or fun without me.”  </p><p>“Will do,” Travis said, giving her a fake solute. </p><p> “Alright,” Maya said, “I’m going home to do some form of rest.  Call if you need anything.”  </p><p>Maya and Carina turned to leave, Andy catching up with them before they got to the stairs.  </p><p>“Is everything alright?” Andy asked, looking at her best friend.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, nodding, “Just some excess fluid in my abdomen because of the treatments.  I just need to rest until they’re done to make sure it doesn’t get too bad.” </p><p> “Man, these drugs are really messing with you,” Andy said, shaking her head, “Well, let me know if you need anything.  Maybe I’ll bring Luca over after work tomorrow?  Remind you of how worth it this all is?”  </p><p>“I would never say no to a visit from my godson,” Maya said, smiling. </p><p> “I’ll text you tomorrow,” Andy said, “Bye Carina.” </p><p> “Bye Andy,” Carina said as she and Maya turned to go. </p><p> However, before they started down the stairs, Maya felt the familiar nausea swelling in her and she clamped her hand over her mouth, running to the bathroom.  Carina followed, rubbing her back.  </p><p>“Ready?” Carina asked after a few minutes.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, standing up.  </p><p>“Captain?” Ben said as he walked into the locker room at the same time Maya and Carina came out of the bathroom, “Carina?  Is everything alright?” </p><p> “Yeah,” Maya said, “Just dealing with one of the lovely side effects of the meds I’m on.  I’ll be fine.  See you later Warren.”  </p><p>“Feel better Captain,” Ben called as they left. </p><p> They made it home, Maya immediately changing into a baggy pair of sweats, sitting down on the couch with her work.  </p><p>“I am going to run to the store to get you some Pedialyte and crackers,” Carina said, “Do you need anything else?” </p><p> “I’m good,” Maya said, shaking her head, “Thank you.”  </p><p>“I will see you soon,” Carina said, giving Maya a kiss.</p><p>  The rest of the day was mostly spent on the couch, both of them working for a while before giving up and turning on the TV.  Carina made some of Maya’s favorite soup, coaxing a little into her that afternoon.  </p><p>The following day, Andy and Luca came over for lunch while Carina was at work which was a welcome distraction from how terrible Maya had been feeling.  </p><p>The next time they went to the doctor, Maya started crying when Dr. Howard told them it was time.  </p><p>Maya took the trigger shot that night, and then neither of them slept because it made her so sick that she couldn’t leave the bathroom for almost six hours.  They were exhausted going into the egg retrieval, but once it was done and they were home, resting in bed, it was hard for them not to be excited.  </p><p>“Our future babies are growing right now,” Maya said sleepily, leaning on Carina.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, smiling as she kissed the top of Maya’s head, “And in a month or so, hopefully, one of them will be growing in me.”  </p><p>“I love you so much,” Maya said, looking up at Carina.  </p><p>“I love you too my beautiful wife,” Carina said, leaning down and kissing her, “Thank you for starting the process of making our babies.” </p><p> “You’re going to do the hard part,” Maya said, smiling at her, “I am so glad you are my wife.  I wouldn’t want to do this with anyone else.”  </p><p>“Neither would I,” Carina said, pulling Maya close, “Neither would I.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>So there was chapter 2! I don't know when I will get the next chapter up because I haven't written it yet, and my next two days will be spent in the car, but hopefully soon.  This story is so fun to write!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Trying</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The next few days were nerve racking to say the least as they waited to find out how many of their eggs developed into embryos.  </p><p>On the fifth day, they got the call.  Both of them, shockingly, were home when Maya’s phone rang.  </p><p>“Carina, it’s Dr. Howard,” Maya called, running into the kitchen where Carina had been making pasta. </p><p> “Answer it,” Carina said, wiping her hands on a towel.  </p><p>“Hello,” Maya said, answering the phone and putting it on speaker. </p><p> “Hello Maya,” Dr. Howard said, “Is Carina with you?”  </p><p>“Yes,” Carina answered, “We are both here.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Dr. Howard said, “Well, as you know, we collected twenty eggs on retrieval day, and today, we have ten viable embryos that are ready for freezing.”  </p><p>“Ten?” Maya said, eyes wide as she smiled at Carina, “That’s great.”  </p><p>“It is,” Dr. Howard said, “They are heading for the freezer now and will be ready whenever Carina is.  By the way, Carina, your bloodwork and scans all came back normal so we are ready to proceed.”  </p><p>“Great,” Carina said, “I will call and get my next appointment set up.  Thank you Dr. Howard.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Maya called. </p><p> “You are both very welcome,” the fertility specialist said, “And congratulations again.”  </p><p>“Wow,” Maya said, hanging up the phone, “Ten embryos.  That is so many.”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding as she put her arms around Maya, “It is.”  </p><p>“What are we going to do with ten kids?” Maya asked, suddenly realizing what ten embryos could mean. </p><p> “We do not have to use them all.  I certainly do not want ten kids,” Carina said, laughing, “And they might not all stick.  There is no guarantee that they will.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, nodding as she kissed Carina, “I don’t know why, but suddenly, this all feels so real.”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, “For me too.  In the next month.  I might be pregnant.”  </p><p>“Wow,” Maya said, pulling Carina close, “We should go celebrate.”</p><p>“That’s a great idea,” Carina said as Maya started pulling on her shirt, pasta making long forgotten as they headed into the bedroom. </p><p> </p><p>Unfortunately, getting pregnant was a little trickier than either of them anticipated.  The two transfers didn’t stick, leaving both of them slightly disappointed, but they knew it wasn’t the end of the world, and Carina scheduled her third transfer hoping to have better luck, deciding to use two embryos to increase their chances this time.  That one got canceled because both Maya and Carina came down with a terrible stomach virus the night before the transfer.  </p><p>The following month, still deciding to use two embryos, and that if it didn’t work, they were going to wait until after the holidays to try again.   After the required waiting time, they were elated to find that Carina was pregnant.  It was mid-October, and they decided to wait until Christmas to tell people, just in case. </p><p> By Thanksgiving, Carina was starting to feel pregnant.  Her boobs were sore, she had bouts of morning sickness, and she had to pee all the time.  </p><p>Both Maya and Carina were getting excited about the prospect of their new addition, and much to Maya’s chagrin, Carina insisted they tell their friends and family on Christmas.  The plan for the day was to spend the morning with Maya’s mom and brother and the afternoon with their friends at their place.  </p><p>Carina got the crazy idea to make an ornament out of their first ultrasound photo for Maya’s mom that said “Hi Grandma” on it and ones for Mason and Andrew that said “Hi Uncle.”  They were going to wrap them and give them on Christmas.  </p><p>Carina also bought a t-shirt for herself that said “Extra Merry This Year” with two little baby feet at the bottom that she was going to wear to their Christmas party.  Maya expressed how cheesy she thought the whole thing was, but, secretly, she thought it was adorable.  </p><p>On Christmas Eve, after they finished prepping for their party, Maya and Carina crawled into bed, both excited for the next day. </p><p> Around 1 am, Carina woke up to pee.  As she got out of bed, she felt her stomach cramp painfully.  She stumbled into the bathroom, sitting down on the toilet and seeing her underwear full of blood.  </p><p>“Maya,” she called out, her stomach cramping again, “Maya.”</p><p>  The blonde walked into the bathroom, rubbing her eyes.  </p><p>“What’s wrong?”  Maya asked, having been expecting Carina to be sick as she had been a few night ago and confused by what she saw.   </p><p>“I’m bleeding,” Carina said, eyes filling with tears, “And cramping.”  </p><p>“What?” Maya said, now fully awake, “Oh, babe.  I’m so sorry.  Let’s get you cleaned up and go to the hospital?  Maybe it’s nothing?”  </p><p>Carina nodded, biting her lip, wanting so much to believe that, but knowing deep down that this was not something with a happy ending.  As they drove to the hospital, Maya held her hand, rubbing circles on it, trying to calm Carina down.  </p><p>They got to the ER, one of Carina’s colleagues confirming the miscarriage.  It was a complete miscarriage so they were going to let her go home pretty quickly.  </p><p>“I’m so sorry babe,” Maya said, climbing into the hospital bed with her wife, holding her as she cried, the blonde trying hard to keep her own tears at bay. </p><p> “I cannot do this anymore,” Carina sobbed, clinging to Maya.                </p><p>“We are going to be home soon,” Maya said, “And they are going to give you something for the pain and we can spend all day in bed.  It will be over soon.”</p><p>  “Not this,” Carina said, gesturing to her belly, “This whole trying to have a baby thing.  I cannot do it anymore, not right now.  I need a break.  I cannot do it.”  </p><p>“Ok,” Maya said, feeling her heart break for the pain Carina was in as well as the thought of losing their dream of having a baby this way, “We don’t have to.  We can stop, be done.  We don’t have to try anymore, ever.”</p><p>  Carina just sobbed, holding tightly to Maya.  </p><p>Within two hours, they were home, Carina knocked out from the pain meds she had been given.  </p><p>Maya was wide awake, unable to sleep after the night they had just had.  She grabbed her phone, texting her mom and their friends, telling them they that she and Carina were sick with food poisoning, that they were fine, but they weren’t up to having Christmas.  </p><p>She then just held Carina for the next few hours, the brunette waking up after about four hours, tears filling her eyes almost instantly.  They spend Christmas that year in bed, Maya getting up to get them some food, but that was it.</p><p>  The next week or so was rough.  No one knew what they were going through, but all their friends could tell the two of them were struggling.  Maya’s friends tried to confront her about it after she snapped at their probie for the fifth time one day, but she blew them off.  </p><p> Maya came home from work one day to find Carina, sitting on the bedroom floor, holding the t-shirt they had bought for her to wear on Christmas. </p><p> “Oh babe,” Maya said, taking the shirt from Carina’s hands, just holding her tightly.  </p><p> </p><p>Over the next month or so, they both tried to work through the miscarriage, Carina allowing herself to cry, and turning back to journaling which was something she always did to process pain while Maya buried her pain in her work and at the gym.  Carina tried to get her to talk about it, but the blonde just pushed her away. </p><p> Finally, Carina had had enough.  </p><p>“Come on Bambina,” Carina said as Maya got up from the table, “Can’t we just sit for a while, maybe talk?” </p><p> “I don’t have anything to talk about,” Maya said, shrugging.  </p><p>“But what if I do?” Carina asked angrily, “Maya, ever since the miscarriage, you have shut me out and pushed me away.  Do you blame me for the miscarriage?  Or did I do something else?”  </p><p>“Of course, I don’t blame you,” Maya said, “You didn’t do anything.”  </p><p>“Then what?” Carina asked, voice softening, “What is going on?”  </p><p>“I don’t know,” Maya said, feeling her eyes fill with tears, “I’m just so mad and sad and you went through hell and I don’t want to make it worse for you.”</p><p>  “Maya, you went through it too,” Carina said, realizing she had never really seen Maya let herself grieve for the loss of their baby, “This wasn’t just my loss.  We both lost our baby, but bambina, keeping it inside is not making it easier for me.  You have to talk to me, Maya.  I thought we had figured that out a long time ago.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said, tears slipping down her cheeks, “But, I don’t know to talk about this. I never wanted kids and now I do, and I was so excited about having a baby with you, about having our own little family that was more than just us, and now that isn’t going to happen.”  </p><p>“It still could,” Carina said, walking over to Maya, “We could still have a baby.”  </p><p>“You said you were done,” Maya said, not making eye contact with Carina.  </p><p>“Oh Bambina,” Carina said, barely remembering this conversation because she was on pain meds and grief at the time, “I said that when I was hurting.  I just needed a break.  I was actually thinking about talking to you about trying again, maybe in March, give us a little more time to heal.”  </p><p>“You want to try again?” Maya asked, looking at Carina.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, “I want to make a family with you, and while I know there are other ways, I want to give this at least one more try, but Maya, we have to talk when you are feeling like this.  You cannot shut me out or this will not work.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said, finally looking at her wife, “I just… I don’t know.  This is just hard to talk about.”  </p><p>“Lo so,” Carina said, wrapping her arms around Maya, “But we have been through plenty of hard things, and we will make it through this one too.” </p><p> Maya nodded, the two of them just holding each other for a while.  </p><p>“I’m sorry I made this harder for you,” Maya apologized, pulling back at looking at her wife, “That I shut you out.” </p><p>“I forgive you,” Carina said, brushing a piece of blonde hair out of Maya’s face, “I’m sorry I gave you the impression I was done with this journey.” </p><p> “I forgive you,” Maya said, leaning up and kissing Carina softly, “And I promise to be better at talking to you.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, kissing Maya back.  A minute later, the two of them went back to cleaning the kitchen, the tension in the house leaving for the first time in over a month.  </p><p> </p><p>The transfer in March didn’t take either and both of them were crushed.  Carina had stayed in bed all day when they got the negative test results. </p><p> “We don’t have to keep doing this,” Maya said, rubbing Carina’s back as they laid in bed, “If this is too much, we can stop.  We can adopt.  I know we said we wanted to do that in the future anyway so we could just do it now.” </p><p> “Let’s try one more time,” Carina said, looking at her wife, “We still have four embryos left.  Let’s transfer two one more time, and if it doesn’t work, we can be done, at least for now, maybe adopt and try again in a few years.”  </p><p>“Are you sure?” Maya asked, playing with Carina’s hair, “I hate seeing you this upset.” </p><p> “I am sure,” Carina said, nodding.  “Alright,” Maya said, “Once more.”  </p><p> </p><p>The following month, after changing Carina’s pre-transfer protocol to something a little different to increase their chances, Maya and Carina again found themselves in the horrible waiting period between the embryo transfer and the test.  </p><p>Maya had gone with Carina to get her blood work done on the day they could find out, but as they were leaving, she got called into a massive 5-alarm fire, leaving Carina alone to wait for the results.  </p><p>The blonde ended up working for a full 43 hours without more than an hour long break.  Her stupid phone had died right after she got to the scene because she had forgotten to charge it.  She shot Carina a text off Vic’s phone, telling her if there was an emergency, to call her on that phone. </p><p> As Maya stumbled through the door of their house, almost a full two days after leaving, all she could think about was eating something besides a protein bar, showering with something besides baby wipes, and sleeping because that hadn’t happened at all.  </p><p>She walked into the kitchen, downing two large glasses of water, deciding food could wait until after a shower and sleep. </p><p> She went upstairs, realizing it was around 4 am when she walked into the bedroom and found Carina sleeping on the bed.  She went into the bathroom quietly, stripping off her nasty clothes before taking a quick shower, almost falling asleep standing up. </p><p> She got out, grabbing an oversized t-shirt before going back into the bedroom.  She was surprised to see Carina awake in bed, waiting for her. </p><p> “Hey babe,” Maya said, climbing into bed next to her, “Why are you up?”  </p><p>“I missed you,” Carina said, opening her arms to Maya. </p><p> “I missed you too,” Maya mumbled, almost falling asleep before remembering that Carina should have the results of her last pregnancy test.  </p><p>“Did Dr. Howard call you?” Maya asked tiredly, not moving from Carina’s warm embrace.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding.  </p><p>“And?” Maya said, looking up at her wife, trying to read her face, but finding it impossible.  </p><p>“Well, the results said that…”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What do you think?  Did it work?  Is Carina pregnant?  I honestly wrote this chapter so fast.  I have some ideas for the next one so I'm hoping to have it up soonish?</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Positive</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So I know I keep saying it might be a while until the next chapter, but this story has been so easy to write.  Enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Positive,” Carina said, smiling at Maya, “I’m pregnant.”  </p><p>“Really?” Maya said, the exhaustion leaving her for a minute as excitement took its place, “You’re really pregnant?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding as Maya sat up, kissing her deeply, “My number are high and looking good.”  </p><p>“Wow,” Maya said, “I can’t believe you are pregnant.”</p><p> “I know,” Carina said, looking at her wife as Maya gently put a hand on Carina’s belly, “I’m trying so hard to be happy about it, but it’s hard.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, nodding as sadness filled her eyes, “I know.  Me too.  I’m scared… That this will be like last time.”  </p><p>“Me too,” Carina said, biting on her lip, “I don’t know what I will do if…”</p><p>“Let’s not think about it,” Maya said, yawning, “At least not for right now.  Let’s just be two people who are expecting a baby.”  </p><p>“You need to sleep, bambina,” Carina said, looking at how rough her wife was looking, “Did you sleep at all on the call?”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said as Carina guided her down to the pillows, “We barely had time to eat, let alone sleep.”  </p><p>“Well, rest now,” Carina said, watching Maya’s eyes grow heavy, “I have to work today so I might not be here when you wake up.”  </p><p>“Love you,” Maya mumbled, eyes already closed. </p><p> “I love you too,” Carina said, “Now sleep.”  </p><p> </p><p>Six weeks later, Carina was eight weeks pregnant, and they were at their fertility specialist’s office for their first ultrasound.  Carina had been really feeling early pregnancy symptoms for the past four or so weeks, fighting what was often a losing battle every night with morning sickness, feeling pretty terrible between the hours of 6pm and midnight every night.</p><p> This was fine when they were home, Maya bringing her peppermint tea and cool towels, and rubbing her stomach, and hold her hair, but when she was at work, constantly feeling like she might throw up was not ideal.  </p><p>To make things worse, the smell of smoke turned out to be a huge trigger for her nausea, meaning Maya usually had to shower at the station and then again when she got home just to Carina could be around her.  She had experimented with different soaps and shampoos when Carina complained she still smelled bad, finally finding one that took the smell out completely.  </p><p>“It’s going to be alright Babe,” Maya said, putting a hand on Carina’s bouncing knee as they sat in the office, trying to calm her down.  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, threading her fingers through Maya’s, “It is just so hard.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said, pressing a kiss to Carina’s temple, “I know.” </p><p> Both of them had been struggling a lot since Carina got pregnant with their anxiety.  Carina would wake up at least twice a week having full blown panic attacks, and Maya found herself having them during the day.  They both so badly wanted to be happy about this baby, but the fear of losing it was beyond overwhelming most days.  </p><p>“Carina Bishop-Deluca,” a nurse called, coming into the waiting room.  </p><p>They both stood, walking hand-in-hand back to the exam room.  Carina first had blood taken before they were left to wait for the doctor. </p><p> “What if there’s no heartbeat?” Carina said, biting her lip, “What if we lose this baby?” </p><p> “I don’t know,” Maya said, honestly, “I know I will still love you, and be here for you, and we will still be a family though.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, wiping her eyes.  A few minutes later, Dr. Howard walked in. </p><p> “Good morning Carina, Maya,” she said, smiling at them, “How are you both doing?”  </p><p>“We’re anxious to see this baby,” Maya said as Carina laid back on the table, getting ready for the ultrasound. </p><p> “I understand,” Dr. Howard said, grabbing the wand, “Well, let’s not delay this anymore.  First, let’s get a heartbeat on this little one.” </p><p> The doctor grabbed the doppler, putting some gel on it before placing it on Carina’s belly.  </p><p>“Alright,” she said, moving the doppler, “Now, sometimes this takes a minute, but.  Oh.”  </p><p>“That’s… That’s the baby?” Maya said, having never heard this before. </p><p> Their appointment for their last pregnancy had been pushed back because of the holidays, and by the time it came around, the baby was already gone, so everything about this was new to Maya. </p><p> “That is your baby,” Dr. Howard said, moving the wand around, “Huh?” </p><p> “Is that…?” Carina said, looking at Dr. Howard. </p><p> “What?” Maya said, concern filling her body, “What is going on? Is something wrong with the baby?” </p><p> “No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “And I think, it might not just a baby.”  </p><p>“What?” Maya said, still confused.  </p><p>“Let me do the ultrasound,” Dr. Howard said, grabbing the probe.  </p><p>“Carina, what is going on?” Maya asked.  </p><p>“Just wait,” Carina told her wife.  </p><p>“Just as I thought,” Dr. Howard said, turning the screen so they both could see, “Here is baby A.”  </p><p>“Why are we giving the baby a letter?” Maya asked, pieces starting to fall into place, but she didn’t want to believe it.  </p><p>“And here is baby B,” Dr. Howard said, moving the probe to show the other baby, “Congratulations.  You are having twins.” </p><p> “Twins?” Maya said, eyes wide as Carina’s jaw dropped. </p><p> “Twins,” Dr. Howard said, “And it appears they both have strong heart beats.  They are fraternal, which means both embryos we implanted stuck.” </p><p> “Twins?” Maya said, again.  </p><p>“I know it’s a lot,” Dr. Howard said, continuing her scan, checking the placement of the placentas and a few other things, “But twins are relatively common with IVF.  We talked about it being possible when we chose to implant two embryos.  If you want, we can talk about reduction…”. </p><p>“No,” Maya and Carina said at the same time.  </p><p>“That’s what I thought,” Dr. Howard said, smiling as she removed the probe, “Well, this is going to put you in a high risk category for your entire pregnancy, so you are going to have to follow up with your OB more often, which I assume won’t be a problem.”  </p><p>“I could probably get an ultrasound every day if I wanted,” Carina said, smiling as she sat up.  </p><p>“Good,” Dr. Howard said, “Well, I want to see you one more time at 12 weeks, and then you will officially be graduated from the fertility clinic.  Congratulations to both of you.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Carina said, seeing Maya’s face was still in utter shock.  </p><p>Dr. Howard left and Carina got up, putting her pants back on.  </p><p>“Maya,” Carina said, looking at her wife who hadn’t moved, “Maya is everything ok?” </p><p> “Twins?” Maya said, “What are we going to do with twins?  That’s two babies Carina.  Two babies at one time.”  </p><p>“I am an OB,” Carina said, smirking, “I know what twins means.  And we are going to make it work.  We can handle twins.  We can do this.” </p><p> Maya nodded a little, still trying to wrap her head around the fact that they were going to be parents to not one, but two tiny humans soon.  </p><p>“Are you ready to go?” Carina asked, putting her hand in Maya’s.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, nodding, “Yeah.  Let’s go.” </p><p> </p><p>The idea of twins was honestly terrifying to both of them and did nothing to allay the fears they had during the early stages of this pregnancy.  They both tried as hard as they could to be happy, but the thoughts of their last miscarriage made it so hard.  They both struggled with their anxiety, and Carina’s evening sickness just kept getting worse too.   </p><p> Around the ten week mark, both her anxiety and nausea were at an all-time high.  They had lost the baby around 10 weeks the last time which made it so much worse. </p><p> Carina was at work, sitting in her office, trying to work her head out of a panic attack and her stomach out of the knots it was in when there was a knock at her office door. </p><p> “Come in,” she called shakily, only able to control so many things at once and the sound of her voice just didn’t make the list tonight.  </p><p>“Hey,” a six month pregnant Amelia said, walking in with two cups of coffee, “I feel like we haven’t worked at the same time in weeks, and I missed my friend.  I thought maybe we could catch up over coffee. Don’t worry.  Mine is decaf.”  </p><p>“Now is not the best time,” Carina said, trying not to breathe through her nose because coffee was, unfortunately for both her and Maya, a smell that made Carina throw up without fail.  </p><p>The blonde had been great, only drinking coffee when she was out of the house and always brushing her teeth before she went near Carina after she had, but it was still rough.  </p><p>“Are you alright?” Amelia asked, setting the two hot drinks down on Carina’s desk, “You look a little pale.”  </p><p>“I am fine,” Carina said, trying and failing to swallow the nausea rising in her stomach, “Just busy.” </p><p> Before Amelia could say anything else, Carina gagged, grabbing her trash can and throwing up into it. </p><p> “Ok,” Amelia said, grabbing her hair, rubbing her back, “Yeah, you are not ok.  You need to go home.  There is a stomach virus that some of the kids at daycare had so maybe you…” </p><p>“I am not sick,” Carina said, grabbing a tissue and wiping her mouth, throwing it into the trash can. </p><p> “You just yakked in the trash can in your office,” Amelia said, eyebrow raised, “If that’s not sick, I don’t know what you consider sick.” </p><p> “I’m not sick Amelia,” Carina said, grabbing a swig of water, “You should go.”  </p><p>“Then why are you…” Amelia stopped, eyes wide, “Wait, are you pregnant?”  </p><p>Carina looked down at her hands.  </p><p>“Oh my gosh,” Amelia said, “Oh my gosh, you’re pregnant?  You are going to have a baby?”  </p><p>“Maya is going to kill me,” Carina said, looking up at Amelia, “Si.  I am pregnant.  We were waiting to tell anyone because last time, I lost the baby.” </p><p> “Last time?” Amelia said, brow furrowing, “What do you mean last time?”  </p><p>“I was pregnant,” Carina said with a sigh, “We did a cycle in October and it worked, but on Christmas Eve, I lost the baby.” </p><p> “Oh my gosh,” Amelia said, looking down at her own pregnant belly, realizing that she had gotten pregnant with this baby around the time Carina lost her own, “Carina, I’m so sorry.  I had no idea.”  </p><p>“We did not tell anyone,” Carina said, looking up at the ceiling to try to avoid crying, “It was a lot to process, and we decided we were not ready to tell anyone.”  </p><p>“I understand,” Amelia said, nodding as she stepped closer to her friend, “And I can still act surprised when you and Maya decide to tell people so she doesn’t know you told me.”  </p><p>“She will not care,” Carina said, shaking her head, catching another whiff of coffee and gagging again, “Can you please take the coffee out?”  </p><p>As soon as she said it, Carina started throwing up again, Amelia taking the two coffees out to the nurses station immediately, giving them away before going back to Carina.  </p><p>“Sorry,” Amelia said, handing Carina a tissue.  </p><p>“It’s fine,” Carina said, wiping her mouth, “Coffee is one of the worst things that makes me sick, but this time of day, it can be anything. The babies are making their likes and dislikes known early, I guess.”  </p><p>“Did you just say babies?” Amelia asked, eyes wide, “As in more than one tiny human growing inside you, babies?”  </p><p>“Oh,” Carina said, realizing she had just let their entire secret out, “Si.  That is the other part.  We are having twins.” </p><p> “Twins?” Amelia said, “Two babies?  Two tiny Italian Olympians?” </p><p> “Yes,” Carina said, laughing as Amelia gave her a hug.  </p><p>It felt good to finally be telling someone about their news, to have someone be excited like this.  Sure, she and Maya were excited, but their excitement was often overshadowed by fear.  With Amelia, it was just pure excitement.  </p><p>“But you cannot tell anyone,” Carina said, looking seriously at Amelia. </p><p> “I promise,” Amelia said, nodding, “I won’t say anything.  Now, do you need anything to help with the nausea?  Tea?  Mints?  Ginger ale?”  </p><p>Before Carina could answer, her pager went off.  </p><p>“I have to go,” Carina said, getting up and grabbing her coat.  </p><p>“Alright,” Amelia said, “Well, congratulations again.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Carina said, smiling as they walked out the door, “Thank you.”  </p><p> </p><p>Meanwhile, at the station, Maya was having a hard day.  </p><p>They had had a tough call where two kids and a mom were trapped in a burning building.  One of the kids died on the scene, the other one was seriously injured, and the mom, who was apparently pregnant, started having a miscarriage as they pulled her out of the building.  </p><p>Maya had held it together at the scene, not letting herself thing about the fact that that mom lost two, possibly three kids that night depending on how the third kid did in the hospital.  </p><p>They made it back to the station, Maya saying nothing before going into her office, closing the door and breaking down.  Tears streaming down her face as she sat in her bunk, barely able to catch her breath.  </p><p>About five minutes later, there was a knock on the door.  </p><p>“Maya,” she heard through the door, “It’s Andy.  I just wanted to check in.”  </p><p>Maya got up, trying to wipe the tears off her face before opening the door.  </p><p>“Are you alright?” Andy asked, seeing the tear tracks on her best friend’s face. </p><p> “That mom lost two kids tonight,” Maya said, feeling the tears start again as she pulled Andy into her office, closing the door, “She did everything she could to take care of them, and it just wasn’t enough.  I don’t know how you do it, with Luca.  And I don’t know how I am going to do it because I have been walking around for the past two and a half months thinking that if we can just make it through this pregnancy that they will be fine, but then shit like tonight happens and I remember that the world is a fucking terrifying place and why do we think we have any business bringing not one but two humans into it and I’m so scared.”  </p><p>By this point, Maya was hyperventilating and in a full blown panic attack.  </p><p>“Hey,” Andy said, guiding Maya into the bunk room, sitting her down, “Hey, breathe.  Come on.  Just follow my breath.  You are going to be fine, Maya, but you have to breathe.”  </p><p>Maya managed to calm down, grateful that her panic attacks were old news to Andy because her friend knew just how to help her calm down.  </p><p>“You good?” Andy asked, handing Maya her water bottle.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, nodding as she took a drink, “Sorry.”  </p><p>“What were you talking about?” Andy asked, replaying Maya’s conversation in her mind, “Wait, did you just tell me Carina is pregnant.. with twins?”  </p><p>“Shit,” Maya said, biting her lip.  </p><p>“Are you serious?” Andy asked, looking at Maya, “She’s pregnant? With twins?  Since when?”  </p><p>“Since April,” Maya said, “She’s like 10 weeks along.  We were just waiting to tell people because it didn’t end well last time and we didn’t want to get anyone’s hopes up, including our own.” </p><p> “Congratulations,” Andy said, giving her friend a hug, “Wait, last time?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, “She was pregnant, but we lost the baby on Christmas Eve.”  “</p><p>So, it wasn’t food poisoning,” Andy said, pieces suddenly falling into place about both that day and the weeks that followed.  </p><p>Maya shook her head, wiping her eyes with a tissue, “No.  It has been a long year.  This was her fifth transfer.”  </p><p>“Oh Maya,” Andy said, watching tears fall down Maya’s cheeks, “I can’t even imagine.”  </p><p>“It’s been a lot,” Maya said, nodding, “And now she’s pregnant again, and I am terrified that we are going to lose these babies too.” </p><p> Andy just nodded, squeezing Maya’s shoulder, “I am so sorry you guys have been through all of this.  Why didn’t you say something?”  </p><p>“We decided not to,” Maya said, “It was hard enough to go through without people wanting to talk about it.  We were going to tell everyone about the last baby on Christmas, but that clearly didn’t work.  We are planning to tell people in a few weeks, once she’s out of the first trimester.  I shouldn’t even be telling you right now.  Carina’s gonna kill me.” </p><p> “I won’t tell,” Andy said, shaking her head, “Carina or anyone else.” </p><p> “Thanks,” Maya said, smiling at her friend.  </p><p>“I can’t believe you are going to be a mom,” Andy said, biting back a smile, “To two kids at once.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, shaking her head, “I truly never thought I was never going to want to, but now, I don’t know, sometimes it’s all I can think about.”  </p><p>“That’s how I felt with Luca,” Andy said, nodding, “My parents were not people I particularly wanted to be, and I was terrified that I would be just like them, but now, I cannot imagine my life without him.  Is there anything I can do to help you right now?” </p><p> “This helped,” Maya said, “Getting to talk to someone who’s not Carina is helpful.  I mean, I love talking to Carina, but we are both so deep in this, it’s good to have someone who isn’t.”  </p><p>“Any time,” Andy said, nodding, “You sure you’re alright?”  </p><p>“I will be,” Maya said, nodding, “Thanks.”  </p><p>“I’m going to get back to work,” Andy said, “But if you need me, I’m here for you.”  </p><p>“Thank you Andy,” Maya said, wiping another stray tear off her cheek. </p><p> “Of course,” Andy said, “And congratulations again.”  </p><p>Maya smiled as she watched her friend walked out of the room, finally feeling like a weight had been lifted.</p><p> </p><p>Later that night, Carina called Maya during her downtime.  </p><p>“Hey babe,” Maya said, picking up the phone, “How are you doing?  Are the kids behaving?”  </p><p>“They are making me feel very sick this evening,” Carina said with a sigh, sitting down at her desk, “Which, actually, reminds me.  I need to tell you something.”  </p><p>“What?” Maya asked, going into her bunk for privacy.  </p><p>“I may have told Amelia about the babies tonight,” Carina said, biting her lip, “I wasn’t going to, but she brought coffee to me earlier and…”</p><p> “You got sick?” Maya guessed correctly, knowing that even the faintest whiff of the liquid energy would send her wife for the nearest bathroom.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding, “And then I told her about the babies.”  </p><p>“Well, I guess you can’t be too mad at me then,” Maya said, “Because I told Andy about them today too.  We had this really hard call.  A little kid died, and another one still might and the mom had a miscarriage while we were evacuating her, and it was a lot.”  </p><p>“Oh Bella,” Carina said, frowning, “I’m so sorry.”  </p><p>“It happens,” Maya said, shrugging, “But Andy found me having a small breakdown in my office, and I ended up telling her.”  </p><p>“It felt good to tell Amelia,” Carina said, smiling.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, “It was good to tell Andy too.  Maybe we should think about telling other people?”  </p><p>“Soon, Bambina,” Carina said, nodding, “Can we please just wait a few more weeks?” </p><p> “Of course,” Maya said, “Whenever you are ready.”  </p><p>“We won’t be able to wait much longer though,” Carina said, placing a hand on her belly, “These two are starting to show themselves.  I could hardly get my scrub pants on today.”  </p><p>“How about we have everyone over in two weeks?” Maya said, “All our friends.  We can tell them then?”  </p><p>“That sounds like a good plan,” Carina said, nodding. </p><p> Just then, the station alarm started going off.  </p><p>“I’ve gotta go,” Maya said, “I’ll see you in the morning.  Love you.”  </p><p>“Love you too,” Carina said, “Be safe.”  </p><p> </p><p>Two weeks later, and Carina was still pregnant, although her night sickness was finally starting to ease.  They were currently getting their house ready to have their friends over.  </p><p>“Sit,” Maya insisted as Carina tried to wash the dishes, “Please?  Rest?”  </p><p>“Maya, I am pregnant,” Carina said, hands on her hips, “No an invalid.  I can wash the dishes.”  </p><p>“Fine,” Maya relented, knowing better than to piss off her wife, especially with the amount of hormones that were coursing through her blood these days. </p><p> Their friends were going to be there in an hour for a barbeque where, unbeknownst to then, Maya and Carina planned to tell everyone about the babies.  They finished the cooking and cleaning they needed to do before there was a knock at the door.  </p><p>“I’ve got it,” Maya called, Carina still upstairs getting ready, “Andy, Robert.  Come in.”  </p><p>“Hi Maya,” Andy said, smiling as her best friend let them in, “Thanks for having us over.”  </p><p>“Thanks for coming,” Maya said, keeping the door open as Teddy arrived with Tom and Allison.  </p><p>Soon, their back yard was full of all the people in their lives: Amelia, Link, and Scout, Travis, Vic, Dean and Pru, Andrew, Miranda and Ben, Jack, Inara, and Marcus.  </p><p>Carina had come down stairs not long after people started coming, wearing a flowy dress. </p><p> “You look really nice Babe,” Maya said, walking up behind her at the kitchen sink about an hour into their get together, wrapping her arms around Carina’s waist, resting her hands on the small bump.  </p><p>“None of my pants that are clean fit,” Carina complained.  </p><p>“We can go shopping tomorrow,” Maya promised, kissing Carina’s neck, “Now stop cleaning and come outside.  I think it’s time we tell everyone why they are really here.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina nodded, drying her hands before grabbing on of Maya’s, “Let’s go.”  </p><p>“Hey guys,” Maya said as they walked outside, grabbing everyone’s attention with her commanding captain voice, “Carina and I have something to tell you.  So as some of you know, we decided we wanted to try to have kids a while back, and we’ve actually been trying for a while, but finally, in April, it worked.” </p><p> “And I am officially pregnant,” Carina said, Maya’s glare keeping everyone quiet so Carina could finish, “So in less than seven months, we will be welcoming twins into our family.” </p><p> A round a congratulations and cheers went around the back yard as everyone celebrated the fact that their two friends were becoming parents.</p><p>  As they talked with their friends, getting separated from each other as Maya went to the grill while Carina sat and chatted on their patio, Carina stole a look over at her wife, seeing the look of sheer joy on Maya’s face.  The blonde sensed Carina looking at her and silently asked if everything was ok.  Carina nodded, smiling back at her because for the first time since they started trying to get pregnant, everything really, truly felt like it was going to be ok.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>There it was! They are going to be moms! To twins!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Boys, Girls, or One of Each</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Can you bring home some pickles and cottage cheese?” Carina asked when Maya called her after her shift. </p><p> “It’s 9 am,” Maya said, laughing, “Are you sure that’s what you want?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, sitting down on the couch as she talked to her wife, “Well, I don’t know if I want it, or if it’s piccolo and patatino, but that is the only thing that sounds good right now.”  </p><p>Maya smiled at hearing the nicknames Carina had given the twins about a week ago.  The Italian was now 14 weeks pregnant, and both of them felt like they could breathe.  Carina was now at a much lower risk for a miscarriage, and the babies were both doing well, according to their first regular OB appointment they had had the day before, before Maya went to work. </p><p>It was still too early to find out if they were having boys or girls or one of each from the ultrasound, but Carina had decided to do a blood test in two weeks that would tell them the babies’ genders.  It didn’t matter to either of them, but they knew they were going to have to name two humans and that needed more than just a few days in the hospital after they were born to decide. </p><p> Carina had given them nicknames that both she and Maya had started calling them, both of them finally feeling like it was safe to start bonding with the babies now that they were pretty likely to stick around.  </p><p>“Well, I will grab that stuff on my way home from work,” Maya said, “Anything else?  Do we still have enough peanut butter for you?”  </p><p>“We probably need more,” Carina said guiltily.  </p><p>There were still a lot of food that made her feel icky but putting peanut butter on it seemed to make everything more palatable.  Two nights prior, Carina had added peanut butter to her pizza which she was not happy about, but it allowed her to eat one of her favorite foods without feeling like she was going to be sick.  </p><p>“I’ll bring some home,” Maya said, adding it to her mental list, “See you in thirty minutes. Love you.” </p><p> “Love you too,” Carina said, hanging up. </p><p> The brunette just sat on the couch, watching a movie with one hand resting on her now noticeable baby bump.  She and Maya had gone shopping for new clothes that would actually fit her and her ever growing belly.  </p><p>Despite that, Carina still preferred to walk around the house in only her underwear and one of Maya’s t-shirts which were almost too small.  Carina was really starting to enjoy being pregnant, now that the anxiety had started to ebb a little, and despite having spent the bulk of her career with pregnant women, this gave her a whole new appreciation for what the female body could do.  </p><p>She rubbed her bump, pulling out her phone and adding another possible name to her ever growing list of baby names.  </p><p>She knew she needed to get up and get ready for the day, and for work which started at noon, but she was so tired.  Sleeping had been getting harder, mostly because she had to pee all the time.  She didn’t even realize she had fallen asleep until she heard the garage open and Maya walk into the house.  </p><p>“Bella,” Carina said, smiling sleepily as Maya walked over to the couch. </p><p> “Were you sleeping?” Maya asked, pressing a kiss into Carina’s forehead.  </p><p>“I think so,” Carina said, nodding, “I was up almost every hour last night to use the bathroom.” </p><p> “I’m sorry,” Maya said, frowning.  </p><p>“It is fine,” Carina said, shrugging as she got up, “Did you bring breakfast?”  </p><p>“You mean pickles and cottage cheese?” Maya asked, laughing, “Yeah.  It’s in the kitchen along with hot chocolate from the place by the grocery store.”  “It is so weird to me that that sounds like it would go great with the pickles.”  </p><p>“Yes it is,” Maya said, nodding, “But if the babies want it, give it to them.” </p><p> “You know we cannot do that when they are here, right?” Carina said, laughing as she got out a spoon and bowl, “Or we will be in trouble.”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, nodding, “I know we can’t do it all the time, but I am going to let these kids do whatever they want within reason.  I will not be my father.”  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, putting her bowl down and wrapping her arms around Maya, “We will treat them like normal kids.  We will teach them to enjoy life and teach them healthy boundaries.  We will not be our parents.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, wiping a stray tear from her cheek.  She had worked through so much of the abuse she suffered and had gotten better at coming to terms with it but thinking about the twins made her worry about if she had really relearned enough to be a good parent.  She had talked to her therapist about it in her once-a-month session and was slowly starting to feel better about it, but Maya doubted the feeling would ever completely go away.  </p><p>“You should eat,” Maya said, pulling away.  </p><p>Carina nodded, sitting down with her food, Maya making a face as Carina cut up the pickles, adding them to the cottage cheese before adding a little bit of hot chocolate.</p><p>  “That is so gross,” Maya said, shaking her head.  </p><p>“It should be,” Carina nodded as she took a bite, “But it is honestly amazing.” </p><p> “This is by far the strangest part of your pregnancy,” Maya said, grabbing herself a cup of water.  </p><p>“I am also hungry for something else,” Carina said, raising an eyebrow at Maya. </p><p> “What?” Maya asked, “I can run out and get whatever you want.  </p><p>“You,” Carina said, finishing her bowl before looking at Maya.  </p><p>“Now, that,” Maya said, taking Carina’s hand, “Sounds amazing.” </p><p> Carina laughed as Maya pulled her upstairs, the pregnant woman’s crazy sex drive right now being one of Maya’s favorite parts of Carina being pregnant.  </p><p> </p><p>“So how long until we know?” Maya asked as the nurse pulled the needle out Carina arm two weeks later.  </p><p>“The results usually come back within two days,” the nurse said, taping a piece of gauze to Carina’s arm. </p><p> “Alright,” Maya said, nodding.  </p><p>“And then you are going to call our friend and tell her?” Carina asked, getting up.  </p><p>“Yep,” the nurse said, “Have a good day Dr. Deluca, Captain Bishop.”  </p><p>“Remind me again why Andy gets to know our babies’ genders before us?” Maya asked as she took Carina’s hand.  </p><p>“Because she really wanted to throw a gender reveal party,” Carina said, shrugging, “And for some reason, you agreed to let her.”  </p><p>“In my defense, I had had a little too much to drink that night,” Maya said, shaking her head, “And Andy is very persuasive.” </p><p> “Well, now she gets to know before us,” Carina said, laughing a little, “Besides, it might be fun.  She promised it would mostly just be a fun party where we will conveniently also learn the genders of our babies.” </p><p> “Fine,” Maya said as they got in the car.  </p><p>“Now, can we go get some food?” Carina asked, “I’m starving.”  </p><p>“Of course,” Maya said, “Where would you like to go?”  </p><p> </p><p>They had gotten Carina’s blood drawn on Wednesday, and the party wasn’t until Saturday.  </p><p>The wait was absolute torture, especially for Maya who hated surprises.  As a kid, surprises were always something bad.  Surprise, you earned yourself an extra 5 miles because you forgot to put your shoes away.  Surprise, you don’t get to eat this weekend because you lost your race.  Surprise, I don’t care that you have been throwing up for 48 hours, you are still running.  Surprise, I told you you can have friends over but one of their coats fell off the hanger you put it on so now I am kicking them out. </p><p> Maya spent her entire life trying to avoid surprises because they always meant pain.  This time, she knew the surprise was a good thing, logically, but the anxiety that was building in her was just as uncomfortable.  </p><p>“Maya,” Carina called, having woken up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, only to find herself in an empty bed.  </p><p>Once she used the bathroom, she decided to go look for her wife.  She found Maya sitting on the couch, and the look on her face told Carina she was not ok.  When they first got together, Carina would find Maya like this more nights than not, sitting on their couch, jaw tight, eyes far away, occasionally tears running down her cheeks.  </p><p>“Maya,” Carina said softly, sitting down next to her wife, putting a gentle hand on her shoulder, “Hey, what’s going on?”  </p><p>“I… I’m just… I don’t know,” Maya said, shrugging, “This whole surprise reveal thing tomorrow is… I don’t know… I guess maybe triggering is the right word. And I know it’s stupid because everything is so unpredictable and surprising so I don’t know why this is making me feel like this.”  </p><p>“Oh Bambina,” Carina said, sighing as she wrapped an arm around Maya, “Sometimes, trauma has no reason, it just is.  I know you know that.” </p><p> Maya nodded a little, “I know.  I just hate it.  I want to know why this triggers me, but other things don’t, or better yet, I would like to just not be triggered at all.”  </p><p>“I wish that for you too, Bambina,” Carina said, kissing the top of Maya’s head, “We could call Andy in the morning and ask, if you want.”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, “No.  I can wait.   I think part of it is that this is just the beginning of the life of uncertainty these two are about to bring, of not knowing what is going to happen to them.  And I am excited for it, I really, truly am, but tonight, apparently, my mind has decided it is going to freak out about all of it.”  </p><p>“I’m sorry you’re feeling like this,” Carina said, stroking Maya’s hair.  </p><p>Both of them try struggled deeply with anxiety, and for Maya it was coupled with depression too.  They had learned over the past four years, how to be there for each other, offering support when it was needed.  </p><p>“What do you think the babies are?” Carina asked after a minute. </p><p> “I think one of each,” Maya said, “A boy and a girl.  What about you?”  </p><p>“I think they are both bambinas,” Carina said, hand on her belly, “Two little girls.”  </p><p>“Let’s make a bet,” Maya said, “If I win, you have to watch Star Wars with me, all of it, before the twins are born.”  </p><p>“And if I win,” Carina said, “You have to rub my feet every night we are both home until the twins come.  And if it’s two boys…” </p><p> “We both have to do the other one’s task,” Maya said, “Now, you should sleep.  I doubt I will get any more tonight, but you and the twins need it.”  </p><p>“Come back to bed?” Carina requested, “Even if it’s just til I fall asleep?  I always sleep better with you by my side, and we spend enough time apart.”  </p><p>“Fine,” Maya said, nodding as they both got up.  </p><p>As Maya predicted, she was wide awake the rest of the night, mind spinning, but every time she looked down at her amazing wife, sleeping beside her, carrying their two babies, she felt just a more grounded.  </p><p> </p><p>Maya and Carina agreed to let Andy have this party at their house because the Sullivan house was currently under construction.  Andy and Teddy both showed up together, the fire lieutenant and cardio surgeon having decided to team up for this bash.  They insisted that Maya and Carina go relax and let them handle things, but after Maya snapped at Andy twice about stupid things, the agreed Maya could help with setting up a little.  By noon, guests were arriving.  </p><p>Both Maya and Carina stayed glued to each other’s side, the blonde needing the calming presence of her wife, and the pregnant woman knowing this just from the way Maya’s hand felt in hers.  </p><p>“Alright,” Andy said, getting everyone’s attention, “If I could please have the women of the hour come on over here.” </p><p> Maya and Carina walked over to the table where Andy and Teddy had put out two cakes.  </p><p>“Thanks Andy,” Maya said, smiling at her friend before looking at everyone, “Now, we will love these babies no matter what they are, who they identify as, or who they chose to love.”  </p><p>“And we know that all of you will too,” Carina said, nodding, “These two babies are going to be some of the most loved little people on the world.”  </p><p>“In the world,” Maya corrected as everyone smiled, “And this was really just an excuse Andy used to throw a party, but I guess we should get on with the reason for it.” </p><p> Andy and Teddy each handed a knife to Maya and Carina.  </p><p>“You first,” Carina said, gesturing to the cake in front of Maya. </p><p> “Here we go,” Maya said, “Baby A.”</p><p>  Maya cut into the cake, pulling the piece out to reveal the bright pink frosting layered between the vanilla cake. </p><p>“It’s a girl,” Maya said, smiling as she looked at Carina, the brunette leaning down and kissing her, “Now you go.” </p><p> Carina grabbed the knife, making a clean cut, removing the piece to show that the chocolate cake also had bubble gum pink frosting inside.  </p><p>“Another girl,” Carina said, smiling, “Two girls!”  </p><p>Maya kissed Carina deeply before the brunette took a piece of the cake, rubbing it on her wife’s face. </p><p> “Hey,” Maya said, laughing as she grabbed a napkin.  </p><p>Congratulations and hugs flew around the yard for a while as everyone celebrated what was now going to be a family of exclusively girls.  </p><p>“I’m going to go wash my face,” Maya whispered in Carina’s ear about twenty minutes later, disappearing upstairs. </p><p> Carina continued chatting with their friends until she realized it had been almost a half an hour, and she hadn’t seen her wife.  </p><p>“Have you seen Maya?” she asked as she pulled Andy aside.  </p><p>“She went upstairs a while ago,” Andy said, thinking, “But I haven’t seen her since.  Want me to go look for her?” </p><p> “I’ve got it,” Carina said, heading upstairs.  </p><p>She was a little worried as to what she might find, knowing Maya had been fighting her demons all day, but the sight she saw when she opened their bedroom door made her smile.  Maya was curled up in bed, arms wrapped around Carina’s pillow, looking content.  </p><p>The pregnant woman knew she should probably be back down at the party with their friends, but everything in her screamed to lay down next to her wife, and she was exhausted so she decided, just for a minute.  She pulled off her shoes, laying down in bed, Maya immediately moving from holding a pillow to holding her, but shockingly not waking.  Carina felt her own eyes get heavy before she fell asleep right alongside Maya.  </p><p>About an hour later, their friends came looking for them.  </p><p>“If I walk in on them having sex again,” Andy said, shaking her head.  </p><p>“Ew,” Vic said as Amelia simultaneously said, “Again?”  </p><p>“I did live with them for two months in the middle of a pandemic,” Andy reminded as they approached the door.  </p><p>She knocked gently, not getting an answer.  </p><p>“Just open it,” Amelia said, shrugging.  </p><p>“If I find them both naked on the other side, so help me,” Andy said. </p><p> Amelia shook her head, cracking the door.  </p><p>“Aww,” Amelia said, opening the door fully to reveal Carina and Maya both fully clothed and sound asleep.  </p><p>“That will be going in the blackmail photo album,” Vic said, snapping a photo.  </p><p>“Come on,” Andy said, dragging the two of them out of the room, closing the door, “Leave them alone.  They both clearly need sleep, and they should get as much as they can now because if those chicas are anything like their mom, sleep is not going to be a common occurrence in this house.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Two girls!!! What do you think? Thank you all so much for reading, commenting, and giving kudos! Happy Holidays!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Moving</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I look so big,” Carina said, standing sideways, looking at her bump in the mirror, “How am I only 18 weeks pregnant?”  </p><p>“Because there are two tiny humans in there,” Maya said, walking up behind her hand putting her arms around her wife’s waist, settling her hands on the ever growing bump, “And you don’t look that big.  I mean, look at Amelia.” </p><p> “Amelia is due in four days,” Carina said, laughing, “And this is her third pregnancy.”  </p><p>“You look beautiful,” Maya said, pressing a kiss into Carina’s shoulder. Carina smiled, turning around and kissing Maya.  </p><p>Suddenly, the pregnant woman pulled away, hands going to her belly. </p><p> “What?” Maya said, concern filling her face, “What happened?  Are the girls ok?  Do we need to go to the hospital?” </p><p> “I don’t think so,” Carina said, leaving her hands on her belly, “About the hospital I mean.  I think… I think I just felt them move.”  </p><p>“Really?” Maya said, eyes wide, “That’s amazing!  Can I feel them?”  </p><p>“Probably not,” Carina said, shaking her head, “It’s not big movements.  It kinda feels like a… maybe a butterfly fluttering it’s wings.  It is strange.”  </p><p>“Wow,” Maya said, smiling, “I can’t believe you’re feeling them move.”</p><p>“I know,” Carina said, smiling as she felt it again, “This makes it feel so much more real.  We are really going to have two babies in like 5 months.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said as they headed out of the bedroom, going into the kitchen, “We should probably start doing stuff to get ready?  Right?  Like maybe plan the nursery or something?”  </p><p>“Or chose their names?” Carina said, raising an eyebrow.  </p><p>“You mean we can’t just call them Piccola and Patatina,” Maya said, nodding, “I was actually thinking about that the other day.  I was thinking, maybe, we could name one after your mom?” </p><p> “Cosa?” Carina said, whipping around and looking at her wife, “Are you serious?”  </p><p>“Only if you want,” Maya said, not sure if Carina was happy or furious with her suggestion, “I mean, we don’t have to, but…” </p><p>“No, I think it is a great idea,” Carina said, smiling, “Are you sure?” </p><p> “Yeah,” Maya said, nodding as she wrapped her arms around her wife’s shoulders, drawing her close, “Your mom had a beautiful name, and even though I never got the honor of meeting her, she made a pretty amazing daughter, and I know you had a complicated relationship, but also that she was important to you.”  </p><p>“Thank you Maya,” Carina said, wiping a tear off her cheek, “That means a lot to me.” </p><p>Maya kissed her wife, feeling Carina smile into the kiss.  </p><p>“The babies like when we do that,” Carina said, hand on her stomach again, “They keep moving when you kiss me.”  </p><p>“Good,” Maya said, kissing her again, “Because I like it too.”  </p><p> </p><p>“Miller, go home,” Maya said, looking at her sick lieutenant.  </p><p>“Captain, I’m fine,” Dean said, coughing into her elbow.  </p><p>“No, you are not,” Maya said, shaking her head, “You are coughing, you look feverish, and you sound like hell.  No one else wants this virus, and I cannot afford to take it home to Carina so get the hell out of my station.”  </p><p>Dean was too tired to argue so he grabbed his bag, leaving.  There was some nasty virus making its way through 19 and Maya was doing absolutely everything in her power not to get it. </p><p> Ben’s kids had brought home this virus from basketball camp, and Ben had been nice enough to bring it to the station.  So far, he had shared it with Herrera, Montgomery, Sullivan, and apparently Miller.  Maya had been trying to stay healthy because she didn’t want to get her wife, who was currently 20 weeks pregnant, sick. </p><p> Once she was sure Miller was leaving, Maya went down to her office, grabbing a tissue off her desk and wiping her nose which was running all of a sudden. </p><p> They got called not long after to a scene that they worked for close to ten hours.  </p><p>“Get some food and rest,” Maya barked as they got out of the truck, coughing a little. </p><p> “You alright Captain?” Andy asked, eyeing her friend.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya nodded, “Just need some water.”  </p><p>Maya went into her office, dropping her stuff before going up to the showers, washing the smell of smoke off as best as she could before heading back downstairs to her office. </p><p> “Cap,” Andy said, knocking on her office door, “Food’s here.”  </p><p>“I’ll be right up,” Maya said, nodding.  </p><p>Andy left, Maya finishing a few files before following her friend.  With Jack’s recent transfer to Captain at Station 42, and Sullivan and Miller both out sick, there were a lot of subs on the A shift tonight. </p><p> They had ordered in Chinese because today was long enough.  Maya sat down next to Andy, grabbing some food.  Maya realized she wasn’t really hungry, feeling a little off for some reason.  </p><p>“Maya,” she heard Andy saying next to her, “Earth to Maya.” </p><p> “Sorry,” the blonde captain said, snapping out of it, “Sorry.  Just spaced for a second.” </p><p> Andy looked at her best friend, not really buying it, but also knowing better than to call her out on it in front of their team.  </p><p>Maya ate maybe five bites of her food before going back down to her office.  She rubbed her temples as she sat at her desk, feeling the ache in her head that had been there all day getting worse.  </p><p>About twenty minutes later, there was a knock on her door.  </p><p>“Captain,” Andy said, coming in, “I have my reports from last week.  Sorry they took longer than normal.  That virus Warren brought in was terrible.”  </p><p>“Thank you for these,” Maya said, taking the reports, “How is Sullivan doing?”  </p><p>“Well, his fever is finally down,” Andy said, “And his cough is going away.  He should be back next shift.”  </p><p>“Good..” Maya started, but broke off into a coughing fit.  </p><p>“Oh Maya,” Andy said when her friend was finally quiet, “You caught it too, didn’t you?”  </p><p>“I’m fine,” Maya insisted. </p><p> “You have a cough,” Andy started, “Your face is flushed, you have been rubbing your temples since I walked in, and you barely touched your Chinese tonight which is one of your favorite foods.  Maya, you’re sick.  Go home.”  </p><p>“I can’t go home,” Maya said, shaking her head.</p><p>  “I’ve got things covered here,” Andy assured her, “You need to rest. Go home.”  </p><p>“I can’t,” Maya said, shaking her head, “I can’t give this to Carina.  She’s pregnant.”  </p><p>“Well, you shouldn’t be working,” Andy said, shaking her head, “Why don’t you crash in your bunk for the night, and I can take you home with me tomorrow.  We’ve all already had it.”  </p><p>“Fine,” Maya mumbled, her head truly pounding at this point.  </p><p>“Go change into pajamas, and I’ll bring you something for the fever,” Andy said. </p><p> Maya nodded, going into her bunk as Andy walked out.  Once Maya had been given some meds, Andy left her with a bottle of water and instructions to call her if she needed anything during the night.  </p><p>Maya spent the bulk of the night tossing and turning, going from too hot to too cold, her chest aching as she coughed.  </p><p>Finally, around 2 am, she drifted off, only to be woken up by the alarm a half an hour later.  She jumped out of bed before remembering she was sick and not technically working right now.  She thought about trying to go on the call, but she was so dizzy that she decided against it.  She climbed back into bed, spending another three hours trying to fall asleep before her mind and body finally decided to work together and let her get some rest.</p><p> </p><p>A few hours later, Carina was standing in front of the hospital, waiting for Maya for their big appointment.  It was the day of the full anatomy scan for the girls, and Maya had agreed to meet her at the hospital after work.  </p><p>Carina had been trying to text and call her for the past twenty minutes, not wanting to go to the appointment alone, but also knowing if Maya didn’t show up in the next five minutes, she would have no choice.  </p><p>As she was waiting, she saw Andy and Ben walking out of the ER.  </p><p>“Andy,” Carina called, getting the firefighter’s attention, “Have you seen my wife?  Were you guys out on a call?  She’s not answering, and I have my 20 week scans today, and she was supposed to be here.”  </p><p>“She didn’t text you?”  Andy asked, “Damn it Maya.  She’s sick.  This idiot brought a virus to the station last week, and Maya came down with it last night.  She’s hopefully sleeping in her bunk right now.  She was going to come stay with me and Robert until she got better because we both already had it, and she didn’t want to get you sick.”  </p><p>“Maya,” Carina said, shaking her head, “I will bring her home after this appointment.”</p><p>  “Are you sure?” Andy asked, “Because it’s really not a problem if you want her to stay with us.  This virus isn’t fun.  Both Robert and I were down for the count for like 5 days.”  </p><p>Carina bit her lip, looking at her watch, “I need to get to my appointment.  I will text you when I am done?”  </p><p>“Sure,” Andy said, “I’ll bring Maya to ours for now, and if you want to come get her, that’s fine.  But, really, she is welcome to stay with us.”  </p><p>“I will think about it,” Carina said, “Thank you.” </p><p> The brunette went upstairs to her appointment.  </p><p>“Hi Carina,” her OB and colleague Danielle said, walking in, “Where’s Maya?  I thought she was joining us today.”  </p><p>“She is sick,” Carina said with a sigh, “I was going to try to facetime her when you are ready to look at the babies if that’s ok?”  </p><p>“Of course,” Danielle said, “First, though, we need to do a few other checks.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, sitting down and letting her friend measure her belly, check the heartbeats, and do a few other things.  </p><p>“I’m going to go grab a few things,” Danielle said, “Now would be a good time to call Maya.” </p><p> Carina nodded, grabbing her phone and facetiming her wife.  </p><p>“Car?” Maya asked, rubbing her tired eyes as she answered the phone, coughing.  </p><p>“Oh Bambina,” Carina said, frowning when she saw how sick her wife looked, “I’m so sorry you’re sick.”  </p><p>“The appointment,” Maya said, bolting up, only to have her head start spinning and she laid back down, “I don’t think I’m gonna make it to the appointment.”  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, laughing a little, “I called so you could see the girls during the scan.  Danielle is just about to start.”  </p><p>“Hi Maya,” the OB said, waving as Carina turned the screen so Maya could see the doctor, “Sorry you aren’t feeling well.”  </p><p>Maya just nodded, sitting up a little in bed.  </p><p>“Alright,” Danielle said, “Here we go.”  </p><p>She squeezed some gel onto Carina’s belly, moving it for a minute before turning the screen so both Maya and Carina could see.  </p><p>“Here is baby A,” Danielle said, moving the probe to show the baby’s face. </p><p> “Look,” Carina said, smiling, “Piccola is sucking her thumb.”  </p><p>Danielle spent a while measuring different things on the baby, showing Maya and Carina different parts of their daughter.  </p><p>“She looks really healthy,” Danielle said, moving the probe down the baby’s legs, “Down to her ten toes.”  </p><p>“She’s perfect,” Maya said, coughing a little. </p><p> Just then, there was a knock on her bunk door.  </p><p>“Hey, Maya,” Andy said, “Are you ready to go?”  </p><p>“Only if you don’t mind watching our ultrasound,” Maya said. </p><p> “Of course not,” Andy said, going over and helping her friend up, “Hi Carina.”  </p><p>“Am I good to move on to Baby B?” Danielle asked.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, leaning heavily on Andy as they walked out to her car.  </p><p>“Alright,” the OB said, moving the wand to the other side of Carina’s belly, “Here she is.  This little munkin is flipped the opposite way of her sister.”  </p><p>“So, it’s her feet kicking my bladder,” Carina said, looking at the screen.  </p><p>“Probably,” Danielle said, laughing.  </p><p>Much the same as with Baby A, Danielle took all the standard measurements, Maya and Carina both watching. </p><p>“Is she flipping us off?” Maya asked as Danielle moved the wand over the baby’s hand, reveling the middle finger clearly up.  </p><p>“Apparently Patatina takes after her mommy,” Carina said, sticking her tongue out at Maya. </p><p> They had decided that Carina would go by Mamma and Maya would be Mom or Mommy.  </p><p>About half way through, they got to the Sullivan house, Andy guiding Maya to the guest room before leaving her to finish watching the ultrasound, promising to be back with some food in a little while.  </p><p>“And she looks really healthy too,” Danielle said, “They are both good sizes, their brains and hearts are healthy, everything else looks perfect.  You two have some amazing looking babies.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Carina said, finally allowed to sit up, wiping the gel off her belly, “Maya, I will call you back when I finish with this?” </p><p> “Thanks for calling me,” the blonde said, nodding, “It was really cool to see the girls.”  </p><p>“Feel better Maya,” Danielle called as Carina hung up the phone.  </p><p>Once she did, Maya climbed under the covers on the bed, rubbing her tired eyes.  About five minutes later, there was a knock on the door.  </p><p>“Hey, are you off the phone?” Andy asked, cracking the door.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, rolling over and looking at her friend, “I really wish I could have been there in person to see the girls.” </p><p> “I’m sorry you got sick,” Andy said, setting down a glass of water on the side table, “Is there anything I can bring you?  Anything at all?”  </p><p>“I’m good for now,” Maya said, coughing roughly.  </p><p>“Take these,” Andy said, handing her some pills, “It’s Tylenol PM so you should be able to sleep for a while.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya said, rubbing her eyes.  </p><p>“Are you sure I can’t get you some soup or something?” Andy asked, handing Maya the glass of water.  </p><p>“I’m fine,” Maya said, shaking her head, “I’m gonna try to sleep this off.  The last time I felt this sick was when I got pneumonia a few years ago.”  </p><p>“Yeah, this is a bad virus,” Andy agreed, “Well, I will have my phone on, and either Robert or I will be home for the new two days.  Just text us if you need anything.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya said, nodding, curling up under the covers as Andy left the room.  </p><p>About five minutes later, her phone rang again.  </p><p>“Hey babe,” Maya said, answering the phone, “How was the rest of the appointment?”  </p><p>“Good,” Carina said as she walked into her office, “I am healthy.  The girls are healthy.  You, on the other hand, are not healthy.” </p><p> “I’ll be alright,” Maya said, coughing.  </p><p>“I am going to come pick you up in a few hours,” Carina said, sitting down at her desk, “I just need to do a little charting first.”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, shaking her head, “Absolutely not.  I am not giving this to you.  This virus sucks, and the last thing you need right now is to feel any more awful than the babies are already making you feel.”  </p><p>“Maya, you should be comfortable while you are sick,” Carina said, “Not forced to stay in a friend’s guest room.”  </p><p>“I am choosing this,” Maya said, yawning, “And Andy has a nice guest room.”  </p><p>“Is there anything you need me to bring over for you?” Carina asked, knowing deep down that Maya was right, that she didn’t need to be sick while pregnant, “Pajamas?  Anything?” </p><p> “Could you bring over a few pairs of pajamas and clean underwear?”  Maya asked, struggling to keep her eyes open.  </p><p>“Of course,” Carina said, “I will drop them off later.  Feel better Bambina.  I wish I was there to take care of you.”  </p><p>“You just take care of Piccola and Patatina,” Maya said, “Andy gave me Tylenol pm so I am about to pass out.  I love you.”  </p><p>“I love you too,” Carina said, “Get some rest.” </p><p> Before Carina had even hung up the phone, Maya was already snoring, her body finally getting some much needed rest.</p><p> </p><p>The next time Maya woke up, it was to the bedroom door opening.  She rolled over, seeing Carina walking into the room.  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, “No.  Get out.  I don’t want to get you sick.” </p><p> “Bambina,” Carina said, looking at Maya, her face covered in an N95 mask, “I will be ok.  I am not staying.  I just was dropping off your clothes, and I grabbed one of these when I was leaving work so I could check on you.”  </p><p>Carina walked over to her wife, putting a hand on her forehead, wincing at how warm she was.  </p><p>“What time is it?” Maya asked, rubbing her eyes.  </p><p>“Almost 6 pm,” Carina said, “Andy said you have been sleeping all day?”  </p><p>“I guess,” Maya said, turning her head and coughing harshly into her elbow.  </p><p>“You sound terrible,” Carina said, “Can I get you anything?”  </p><p>“I’m ok,” Maya said, leaning into the pillows, “You should go, though.  Trust me, you do not want this bug.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, smoothing Maya’s wild hair, “Well, I will call tomorrow.  Feel better Bella.  I will miss you.”  </p><p>“I’ll miss you too,” Maya said, shivering a little, pulling the blankets closer.  </p><p>“Oh,” Carina said, grabbing the bag she had brought for Maya, “Here is your favorite blanket, and one of my sweatshirts. And the pictures from the ultrasound today so you could get a better look at Piccola and Patatina.”  </p><p>“You are the best,” Maya said, sitting up and taking the items from her wife, slipping on the sweatshirt, “Now go. I love you.”  </p><p>“I love you too,” Carina said, “Call if you need me.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, curling up under the covers.  She was still tired, but she was pretty sure sleep wasn’t going to happen any time soon.  About twenty minute later, Andy knocked on the door, letting herself in.  </p><p>“I have soup,” she said, “And bread.”</p><p>  “I’m not really hungry,” Maya said, shaking her head. </p><p> “Not even for Carina’s homemade soup and brioche from the bakery you two love?” Andy asked, setting the bowl down on the nightstand.  </p><p>“She made soup?” Maya asked, forcing her achy body to a somewhat sitting position.  </p><p>“She did,” Andy said, nodding, “She made a huge pot of that soup she always makes when someone’s sick.”  </p><p>“Minestrina,” Maya said, picking up the bowl.  </p><p>“Yes,” Andy said, nodding, “She said it’s the only thing you eat when you’re sick.”  </p><p>“It is literally the most delicious soup ever,” Maya said, shrugging as she took a bite, “And Carina’s is better than any I’ve had anywhere else.”  </p><p>Andy just smiled, looking at her friend.  </p><p>“What?” Maya said, seeing Andy staring at her. </p><p> “I just still can’t believe you are the same Maya Bishop I met in the Academy,” Andy said, “That you have a wife and two daughters on the way and you get excited about homemade soup when you’re sick.  Back then, you swore you would never marry, that being sick was for people who were too weak to embrace the pain, and then Carina walked into your life and all of that changed.”  </p><p>“I could say the same for you,” Maya said, coughing harshly, “You never wanted a family, never wanted to open up to anyone, but now, you and Robert and Luca.” </p><p> “I know,” Andy said, shaking her head, “We have become the women we always swore we never would, and I have never been happier to be proven wrong.”  </p><p>“Same,” Maya said, smiling.  </p><p>Suddenly, they both heard a distinct “Mami” coming from downstairs. </p><p> “Duty calls,” Andy said, “Just text me if you need me.”  </p><p>“Thanks Andy,” Maya said, leaning back into the pillows, grabbing the ultrasound pictures off the nightstand and studying them, trying to imagine what they were going to look like when they entered the world in twenty weeks or less.  </p><p>After she finished her food, Maya laid back down, throwing on an audio book before closing her eyes.  </p><p>About twenty minutes later, the bedroom door opened again.  Maya opened her eyes, not seeing anyone standing there.  However, when she looked over the side of the bed, she saw little Luca standing there.  </p><p>“Mai Mai,” he said, reaching up to her.  </p><p>Maya knew that he had already gotten this virus so she wasn’t worried when she reached down, lifting the newly turned two year old into the bed with her.  </p><p>“Hey little man,” she said, smiling at him.  </p><p>“Mai Mai ick?” Luca asked, looking at her.  </p><p>“Yes,” Maya said, “I am sick.”  </p><p>Luca frowned, patting her head roughly in what was clearly a toddler attempt to comfort her.  Maya winced, happy he stopped after a few whacks.  </p><p>She grabbed her phone, texting Andy “Did you lose something?”  </p><p>A minute later, Andy was running into the room.  </p><p>“Luca,” Andy said, picking up the toddler off the bed, “I’m so sorry Maya.  I thought he was watching football with Robert.  Luca, Tia Maya is sick so we need to leave her alone.”  </p><p>“He’s ok,” Maya said, shaking her head, “He was checking on me I think.”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Andy said, nodding, “He did that when I was sick, which is probably how he caught it.  Being sick with a toddler is much less restful than being sick before kids.”</p><p>  “Can’t wait,” Maya said sarcastically.  </p><p>“We will let you rest,” Andy said, “I will try to keep him out of here.  Oh, you should probably take more meds too.” </p><p> “Thanks,” Maya said, grabbing the bottle, taking two of the pills before drifting back off to sleep, realizing that being sick, just like everything else in her life, was about to drastically change once the babies were born.  </p><p> </p><p>It took Maya a full week to completely recover from the virus, meaning she and Carina were apart for way too long in both of their opinions.  Finally, a week after she got sick, Maya’s fever broke, and she finally started feeling human again.  </p><p>Once she had been fever-free for 24 hours, she packed her things and headed home.  Carina was there, waiting for her at the door.  </p><p>“Bambina,” Carina said, wrapping her arms around Maya as she walked into the house, “I missed you so much.”  </p><p>“I missed you too,” Maya said, kissing her wife.  </p><p>Carina smiled, pulling back, “I think the babies did too.  They are moving like crazy.”  </p><p>Maya put her hands down on Carina’s belly.  </p><p>“Wait,” Maya said, “What was that?”  </p><p>“The girls are kicking,” Carina said, smiling, “Can you feel it?”  </p><p>“A little,” Maya said, pressing a little, “I think I can, yeah.”  </p><p>“Here,” Carina said, lifting her shirt, placing Maya’s hands on her bare belly where the babies were kicking, “There, do you feel it?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, feeling her eyes well up with tears, “Is that really our babies?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, feeling her own eyes water, “Those are our babies.  They are so excited their mommy is home.”  </p><p>Maya just stood there, her hands on Carina’s belly as the babies kicked and kicked.  </p><p>“That is so cool,” Maya said, feeling the tiny movements.  </p><p>“I am so glad you get to feel it now too,” Carina said, capturing Maya’s lips on hers, the girls kicking more as she did so.  </p><p>“God, I love you so much,” Maya said as they pulled apart, “And I love them so much too.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  I'm trying to decide how many more chapters before the babies are born.  I'm thinking two, but if you have ideas you'd like to see, let me know!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Surprise</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“So what color are you thinking for the nursery?” Maya asked as they sat down for breakfast.  </p><p>Carina was 22 weeks pregnant, and they both were realizing that their little girls were going to be there before they knew it. </p><p> Maya had spent her last day off cleaning out a room that had been used as an office/workout room since they moved into this house almost two years ago.  They were planning on turning that room into the twins’ nursery.  Maya had gotten rid of the desk that they almost never used and moved her treadmill into the basement.  </p><p>“I was thinking maybe green?” Carina said, “Or maybe light grey?  Mason has told me probably 10 times that he will paint a mural if we want on the wall.”  </p><p>“He’s told me the same thing,” Maya said, nodding, “Do you think we should let him?”  </p><p>“His art is pretty incredible,” Carina said, shrugging, “And it would be nice.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, nodding, “Well, good, because I have an idea of what he could paint.”  </p><p>“What is it?” Carina asked, taking a bite of her peanut butter toast, a staple breakfast food for her these days. </p><p> “It’s a surprise,” Maya said, smiling at her wife, “But I promise you will love it.”  </p><p>“Fine,” Carina said, rolling her eyes playfully at the fire captain, leaning over and giving her a small peck on the cheek.  </p><p>“I need to get going,” Maya said, looking at her watch, “You work at noon, right?” </p><p> “Si,” Carina said, “Noon until 8.” </p><p> Maya nodded, going upstairs to finish getting ready for her day.  Once she had everything she needed, she grabbed her bag, heading downstairs.  </p><p>“Have a good day Bella,” Carina said, giving her a kiss, “Be safe.  I love you.” </p><p> “I love you too,” Maya said, smiling as she kissed her wife, her hands on the ever-growing bump, feeling the twins kick and punch as she did so. </p><p> They both smiled at each other, just enjoying the moment.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, “I’ll call you tonight if we don’t have too many calls.”  </p><p>Maya headed out the door, walking the five blocks to the station with a smile pasted on her face, thinking about how she was the luckiest woman in the entire world.  </p><p>“You cannot tell Carina about this,” Maya said as she and half her team arrived at Grey Sloan around 7 pm. </p><p> They had been called to a 4 alarm fire and just as they were about to leave the building, a ceiling had collapsed, injuring Maya, Travis, Vic, and Robert.  They were all sent to the ER to be checked out per station protocol, but also because they were all hurting pretty bad. </p><p>“I think that might be a little tricky,” Travis said as he limped into the ER.</p><p>  Carina was seeing a patient, but her eyes instantly widened upon seeing the 19 crew staggering in.  As they all walked up to the nurses station, Carina tried desperately hard to keep her attention on her patient and not on her wife who was clearly favoring her left arm.  </p><p>The firefighters were taken back to two rooms, all of them insisting they were fine and didn’t need to take valuable resources from anyone else.  Maya was paired in a room with Vic, and a nurse came in, taking their vitals and giving them a preliminary exam.  </p><p>Vic had been knocked in the head and had a laceration on her scalp along with a possible concussion because her helmet had been knocked off.  Maya’s shoulder was crazy sore, and probably dislocated. </p><p> They were both given gowns to change into and told to wait for the tests they were going to need.  Maya stood up, wincing as she pulled her suspenders off her sore shoulder.  Just then, there was a knock on the door, and Carina walked in.  </p><p>“What happened?” she asked, immediately going to her wife.  </p><p>“Four alarm fire,” Maya said, deciding to leave her turnout pants on because she didn’t want to be barefoot in the hospital, “We were leaving and the ceiling collapsed.  I’m alright.  My shoulder is probably dislocated, but other than that, I’m fine.”  </p><p>“Good,” Carina said, glad the babies had decided the smell of smoke was acceptable because otherwise she wouldn’t be able to be in this room, “And Vic?”  </p><p>“I’m alright,” the younger firefighter said, “My helmet fell off and I got hit in the head.  I’ve probably got some degree of concussion, but I didn’t black out or anything so it’s probably mild.”  </p><p>“Did anyone else get hurt?”  Carina asked, helping Maya into the gown, careful not to bump her shoulder which was turning a dark purple color.  </p><p>“Travis and Robert,” Maya said, nodding as Carina tied the gown, “Travis has some kind of ankle injury, and Robert probably broke his arm which is the last thing anyone needs right now, but everyone should be fine.”  </p><p>Carina nodded as a nurse walked in. </p><p> “Oh,” the nurse said, seeing Carina, “Dr. Deluca.  I’m sorry.  I didn’t know you were doing a consult.”  </p><p>“I am not,” Carina said, “This is my wife.  I was just checking in, but I am getting paged.  I am off in an hour.  Don’t discharge her before then?” </p><p> “We won’t,” the nurse assured as Carina let go of Maya, going back to the busier part of the ER, “Alright.  I have an order for a head CT for Victoria Hughes.”  </p><p>Within the next two hours, Vic was given a head CT and was diagnosed with a mild concussion by Amelia, Maya had her shoulder x-rayed and reset by Link, Robert had his arm casted by Nico, and Travis was strapped in an ankle boot for the next two weeks for his sprained ankle.  All of them were told to take two weeks off, except Robert who was going to be in a cast for at least a month.</p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, coming back into the room where all 4 firefighters were now waiting together, “I have the discharge orders for everyone.  Vic, you are not allowed to be alone tonight so you are coming over to ours.  Robert and Travis, I can give you both a ride home as well if you would like.”  </p><p>“Thanks Carina,” Travis said, nodding as they all headed out.  </p><p>They swung by the station so everyone could drop their gear, grab their street clothes, and talk to the rest of their team.  </p><p>“So, we are off rotation for the next two weeks,” Maya said, looking around, “You all can pick up shifts with other shifts, and I will be here in the office during the days.  I called in a few people for the OT for the rest of this shift, and Miller, you are in charge.”  </p><p>They all nodded, wishing everyone well as they left.  Once everyone else was dropped off at home, and Vic was safely tucked in the guest room, Maya and Carina got ready for bed.  The OB had been unusually quiet since they left the hospital, not saying more than two words to her wife, and once they were in bed, Maya decided to call her on it.  </p><p>“What’s wrong Babe?” Maya asked, brushing a piece of hair off Carina’s forehead with her good arm.  </p><p>“I’m just tired,” Carina said, pulling away.  </p><p>“I’m sure you are tired,” Maya said, “But that’s not what’s wrong.  Come on.  Talk to me.”  </p><p>“I could have lost you tonight,” Carina said, biting her lip as she looked down, “We could have lost you.  I don’t want our girls to grow up without their mom.”  </p><p>“Oh, Carina,” Maya said, wrapping her arm around her wife as Carina started to cry, “I don’t want that either.  I think about it all the time.  My job is dangerous, but I always do everything I can to come home to you every day.” </p><p> “I know,” Carina said, still crying, “But what if it’s not enough?  What if one day you don’t come home?” </p><p> “I will,” Maya said, “I promise.”  </p><p>“You cannot promise that,” Carina said, shaking her head, “It is impossible for you to promise that.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said with a sigh, “I wasn’t going to tell you this, because it’s a long shot and I might not get it and I don’t want to get your hopes up, but our battalion is in need of a new battalion chief since Chase is leaving at the end of the year for a job at the academy, and I put in my application last week.  I probably won’t get it.  I am years younger than anyone else who applied, and most of them are men which still stupidly gives them the advantage, but if I get the job, I will be doing a lot more paperwork and a lot less fires.” </p><p> “I thought you loved fighting fires,” Carina said, wiping a tear from her eyes. </p><p> “I do,” Maya said, “But I love you and the girls more, and I will still fight fires sometimes, but it will be better and the hours are more regular and less 24 hour shifts which will be better for having kids.  Plus, I would like to be Seattle’s first female fire chief one day, and this is the next step toward that.”  </p><p>“You’re serious about this?” Carina asked, wiping a tear from her cheek.  </p><p>“I am,” Maya said, nodding, “Like I said, I probably won’t get it.  I haven’t told anyone at my station about it either, so could you keep it just between us for now.”  </p><p>“Of course,” Carina said, nodding as she leaned over and kissed her wife, “I am glad you are safe tonight.”  </p><p>“So am I,” Maya said, holding Carina close, “I promise to always try to come home to you and the girls, no matter what.” </p><p>“Good,” Carina said, snuggling into Maya’s arms, “Now, let’s get some rest.”  </p><p> </p><p>Having a pretty free schedule for a few weeks proved to be very useful for something.  When Carina was at work, Maya would have Mason come over on the weekends to work on painting the nursery. </p><p> Maya herself had done the base coats on the walls, painting three of them a light green while painting the fourth white so Mason had a good canvas for his mural. </p><p> “Wow,” Maya said, walking into the nursery with some water and snacks for her brother one morning, “This looks incredible.  Carina is going to love it.” </p><p> “Thanks,” Mason said, grabbing the water, “It is a really pretty photo you asked me to paint.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, smiling as she watched Mason pick up his brush again, going back to his work.  </p><p>“I am so glad you went back to art school,” Maya said, watching Mason work, “You truly have an amazing gift.  For all the things I struggle to forgive Lane for, not letting you be the artist you are is close to the top of that list.” </p><p> “He’s an asshole,” Mason said, shrugging as he switched colors, “And we didn’t deserve what he did to us, either of us.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, watching her brother paint in silence for a minute.  </p><p>“I can’t believe you are painting a mural in my kids’ room,” Maya said, shaking her head, “Did you ever think we would be here? That either of us would ever be crazy enough to have kids to fuck up like Lane did to us.”  </p><p>“I honestly never thought I would let you back into my life,” Mason said, turning to look at her, “You were so much like him, but you have changed Maya.  I look at you now and I can see how amazing of a wife you are, and how amazing of a mom you are going to be to these girls.  You are nothing like him anymore.  These babies are so lucky to have you as a mom, Maya, just like I am so lucky to have you as a sister.”  </p><p>Maya felt tears pricking her eyes as she walked over, putting her hands on Mason’s shoulders.   </p><p>Four years ago, Maya never thought she would see Mason again.  But then the pandemic had hit, and living on the streets got so much harder.  Mason had gone to a rehab, gotten clean, and then found their mom.  He lived with her for the duration of the pandemic, becoming a UPS driver while taking classes online.  </p><p>After the pandemic ended, he went back to art school, earning his degree quickly before becoming an art instructor at the high school and becoming pretty successful in the local art scene.  He moved into his own place and had a steady girlfriend for the past year.  </p><p>During the pandemic, he had started talking to Maya again and was shocked at how different his big sister was.  She had gone from being a carbon copy of their father to someone he hadn’t seen since they were kids, caring, putting others first, much less controlling, and so much happier.  They had reconnected and gotten closer. </p><p> They didn’t have a normal sibling relationship, but they did still see each other and were a part of each other’s lives again. </p><p> “I need to get to work,” Maya said, “I’ll bring back lunch around 1?”  </p><p>“Sounds good,” Mason said, “How long until your officially back to work for real?”  </p><p>“Another three days,” Maya said, stretching her shoulder a little. </p><p> “Good,” Mason said, smiling at his sister, “Hey, when is Carina supposed to be home?”  </p><p>“Not until like 8 pm,” Maya said, “She’s on a 12 hour today.” </p><p> “Perfect,” Mason said, nodding, “Well, have a good day at work.”  </p><p>Maya headed out, groaning as she walked into her office for another day of paperwork.  She had reorganized her office at least twice in the past two weeks and had gone through her manuals and reviews.  She was not good at being on desk duty, and was ready to be back to active duty.  </p><p>She went home a few hours later, bringing sandwiches with her.  She toed off her shoes before going up to the nursery.  </p><p>“Mason,” she said, her eyes wide, “This is perfect.  Is it done?” </p><p> “I probably have about another hour worth of work to do, but I should be done this afternoon,” Mason said, taking the sandwich from his sister as they sat down on the floor together.  </p><p>“I can’t believe in the next four months, this is going to be my kids’ room,” Maya said, looking around, “I can’t believe I am going to have two kids.” </p><p> “I never thought you were going to be a mom, like ever,” Mason said, taking a bite of his food, “But now, I think you are going to be a great mom to these two little munkins.” </p><p> “Thanks,” Maya said, eating her own food, “I just hope I can be better to them than our parents were to us.”  </p><p>“You will be,” Mason said, nodding, “You have done the work to not be Lane or Mom.  Any kid would be lucky to have you as their mom.”  </p><p>Maya smiled her classic shy smile, looking at her brother.  As they ate, they chatted about Mason’s job and Maya’s work too, and Mason’s plan to propose to his girlfriend before the end of the year.  </p><p> After about an hour, Maya headed back to work for a little while, glad they only lived a few blocks from the station.  </p><p>When she got home at 5, she found Mason in their kitchen, cooking dinner.  </p><p>“So, I finished the mural,” Mason said, “And Lyla is working tonight so I decided to cook for you.”  </p><p>“You are a great brother, you know that?” Maya said, smiling as she looked into the pot on the stove, seeing he was making a rice dish their mom used to make when they were young.  </p><p>Mason smiled, dishing up dinner for both of them before they sat down, enjoying their second meal of the day together. </p><p> Mason headed out around 7, and Maya went upstairs to do some stretches for her arm.  </p><p>Carina came home a little after 9, having gotten pulled into an emergency surgery.  She was exhausted and her feet were aching from being on them all day.  She walked inside, finding Maya in the kitchen with food waiting for her.  </p><p>“Hey babe,” the blonde said, smiling as her wife walked in, “How was your day?”  </p><p>“Long,” Carina said, going to wash her hands, “I am so tired.” </p><p> “Well, have something to eat,” Maya said, guiding Carina to the table.  </p><p>“This looks awesome,” Carina said, taking a bite, “Thank you for cooking.” </p><p> “Don’t thank me,” Maya said, taking one of Carina’s feet and starting to rub it, the pregnant woman moaning with pleasure, “Mason made dinner tonight.”  </p><p>“What was Mason doing here?” Carina asked, confused.  </p><p>“I invited him over,” Maya said, shrugging.  </p><p>Carina was too tired to ask any more questions so she just ate as Maya rubbed her sore feet.  </p><p>“Can we go to bed?” Carina asked, yawning as she finished dinner.  </p><p>“Of course,” Maya said, nodding, “Come on.” </p><p> They got upstairs, Carina heading for the master bedroom.  </p><p>“Actually,” Maya said, “Let’s go in the nursery first.” </p><p> “Why?” Carina asked, rubbing her tired eyes, “I already saw that you painted it.” </p><p> “Just come on,” Maya said, dragging her wife into the room, turning on the light.  </p><p>“What is so… Oh my goodness, is that the park from Sicily my mamma used to take Andrea and I to?” Carina said, tears filling her eyes as she looked at Maya, “When did this get done?” </p><p> “Mason has been coming on the weekends since I got hurt,” Maya said, “And a few afternoons when he didn’t have work.  Do you like it?” </p><p> “I love it,” Carina said, tears running down her cheeks, “It is so perfect.  Thank you.” </p><p> “I thought it would be nice for the girls to get to have a little piece of Italy in their room,” Maya said, wrapping her arms around Carina, “And a little piece of their nonnina.”  </p><p>“It is perfect,” Carina said, giving Maya a kiss, “Thank you so much.  I love that I get to share a little piece of my home with Piccola and Patatina every day.”  </p><p> </p><p>“We don’t have to go if you don’t want to,” Maya said, walking over to her wife who was sitting on the edge of their bath tub, hand on her aching back, “Link and Amelia will understand if you aren’t feeling up to it.” </p><p> Carina was now 24 weeks pregnant and starting to really feel it.  It was only 10 am, but Carina had already cried twice, once because her back was so achy from all the extra weight the babies were starting to accumulate and a second time because she ate pizza for breakfast because that sounded good, but then she got heartburn from the tomato sauce.  </p><p>This kind of stuff did not happen every day, but it was becoming more regular as the pregnancy wore on.  Also, the girls had spent the night before kicking Carina both in the lungs and bladder, keeping her up for all but thirty minutes, leaving her feeling strung out and icky.  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, standing up and going back to the counter to finish her hair, “I will be fine.” </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, massaging Carina’s lower back gently to alleviate some of the pain, “But if you want to leave early, they won’t mind that either.  Amelia just had a baby a month ago so she understands better than probably any of our friends right now.” </p><p> Carina nodded, twisting her hair up into a messy bun, needing it off her neck.  They were going over to Link and Amelia’s to just spend some time with them and have lunch.  </p><p>Once Carina was ready, they headed out of the house, driving across town to the house Amelia and Link lived in with their almost 4 year old son Scout and their almost one month old Harper.  They pulled into the driveway, Carina taking a deep breath.  </p><p>“You alright?” Maya asked, rubbing her thumb on the back of Carina’s hand. </p><p> “Si,” Carina said, smiling, “Just tired.”  </p><p>“We don’t have to stay long,” Maya said, leaning over and planting a kiss on Carina’s lips, “Just tell me when you are ready to go.” </p><p> Carina nodded and they both got out of the car, knocking on the front door. </p><p> “Hey,” Amelia said, coming to the door with Harper in a sling on her chest, “Come on in.  We were hanging out out back.”  </p><p>Maya and Carina walked through the house and out to the back yard.  </p><p>As they walked out, suddenly, the yard was full of their friends yelling “Surprise.” </p><p> Both Maya and Carina froze, looking at the back yard.  There was food and balloons and all their friends standing there. </p><p> “Welcome to your baby shower,” Amelia said, smiling at both women, “Surprise.” </p><p> “Amelia,” Carina said, looking at her with tears in her eyes, “What?”  </p><p> “We thought a surprise baby shower was the best way to go,” Andy said, walking up to them.  </p><p>“Thank you,” Carina and Maya said at the same time, smiling at their friends.  </p><p>“This is incredible,” Maya said, “And you just had a baby, Amelia.  How did you even pull this off?”  </p><p>“Oh, all I did was provide the house,” Amelia said, bouncing a little as Harper fussed, Andy, Vic and Teddy did most of the planning.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Carina said, smiling. </p><p> “Come on,” Andy said, guiding them into the backyard as Amelia went to grab her nursing cover to feed her daughter.</p><p>  The next few hours were filled with food and games and chatting and opening gifts.  Maya kept a close eye on her wife, knowing she hadn’t been feeling her best that morning.  </p><p>“Hey,” Maya said, sitting down next to Carina who was sitting in a chair alone, “How are you feeling?” </p><p> “Tired,” Carina said, leaning her head on Maya’s shoulder, “Also so grateful we have this many people in our lives to care for our babies.”  </p><p>“We are really lucky,” Maya said, nodding as she planted a kiss in Carina’s hair, “Are you feeling ready to leave?”  </p><p>“Not yet,” Carina said, shaking her head, “I just needed a little break.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, just sitting there with the pregnant woman.  </p><p>“I can’t believe the station got us a crib,” Maya said, looking over at the boxes that they had opened about an hour earlier, “And that your friends got us the other one.”  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, sitting up, “And they got the ones we wanted.  Now, we can set up the nursery.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said, nodding, “It’s crazy.  These babies are going to be here in less than four months.”  </p><p>“They might be here in less than three,” Carina reminded her, “Remember, the average length of a twin pregnancy is 35 weeks.  That’s 11 weeks from now.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said with a sigh, “It’s crazy.  We are going to be parents probably before Christmas.” </p><p> “I know,” Carina said, shaking her head, “And we get to bring these girls into a world of people who love them so much.”  </p><p>“They are going to have so many aunties spoiling them,” Maya said, shaking her head as she watched some of their friends making baby onesies at a table on the other side of the yard.  </p><p>“And I can’t imagine it any other way,” Carina said, smiling as she moved to capture Maya’s lips on her own, “I love the love they are going to get to feel.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>And thus concludes the last chapter of 2020! There will be more in 2021 for sure.  I love this fandom and have loved being invited in with such open arms.  2020 has been a trip, and I can't wait to see what 2021 has to offer (genuinely hoping its better than 2020, but who the hell even knows anymore).  Happy New Year everyone!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Crib Building and Babymoon</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Can you believe the girls are going to be sleeping in here soon?” Maya asked as she carried the second crib box into the nursery.  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, folding another blanket, sticking it on a shelf in the closet, “We have so much to do before they come.”  </p><p>“Well, hopefully, today will take care of some of it,” Maya said, opening the box. </p><p> They had been washing the girls blankets, cloths, and other items over the past week when they had time in preparation for both of them being home on Friday all day to work on the nursery.  Carina was folding the little clothes and blankets while Maya was building the cribs, rocker, and dresser.  </p><p>“Why does this have more instructions than we give to probies on their first day at the station?” Maya groaned, pulling out first crib.  </p><p>“I believe in you,” Carina said, laughing as she folded another onesie, setting it in a laundry basket for when the dresser was done.  </p><p>An hour later, Maya threw the instruction book across the room.  </p><p>“This is literally impossible,” the blonde said, rubbing her hands over her face. </p><p> “Would you like some help Bambina?” Carina asked, putting the last of the blankets they had away.  </p><p>“I should be able to figure this out,” Maya said, “How the hell am I going to be able to be a good mom to these babies if I can’t even build them a place to sleep?”  </p><p>“Hey,” Carina said, frowning as she heard the crack in Maya’s voice, realizing the frustration was more than just about the crib, “Come here.”  </p><p>Maya stood up, looking at Carina with tears in her eyes.  </p><p>“What’s going on?” Carina asked, pulling her close.  </p><p>“I’m scared,” Maya said, “I’m scared that I am going to mess these babies up or not know what to do with them when they cry or are scared or get sick or anything because all I have as an example is Lane who only thought about winning and literally didn’t care about my well-being and my mom who just rolled over to whatever my dad wanted and now we are having two babies and the only thing I can think is that I don’t want them to ever hurt and I’m terrified I am going to be the one that causes them pain.” </p><p> “Hey,” Carina said, pulling Maya out of her spiral, “Listen.  You are probably going to do things that will hurt the girls.  I’m sure I will too because that is part of life, but the thing that is different, is that we will recognize when it happens and try to make it right.  I’m scared too Maya.  I had a mamma who moved across the world to be away from my papa, but left me there with him because she was too weak to stand up to him and take both of us.  And a papa who was too mentally ill to be a parent and whose favorite pastime was telling me how much of a disappointment I was.  Maya, we are both going into this without the kind of guidance we would like, but we know what we don’t want to do.  We can do this.  We will be better than our parents, but we are going to have to rely on each other.” </p><p> Maya nodded, wiping a tear off her cheek before leaning up and kissing her wife. </p><p> “Let’s take a little break from this,” Carina said, gesturing to the nursery, “We can go grab some food and then you can try again later.” </p><p> Maya nodded, both of them walking out of the nursery feeling a little better than when they had gone in.  Maya made them some food, the two of them enjoying it on the couch before Carina fell asleep.  </p><p>When the brunette woke up, she was alone on the couch.  She got up, stretching a little as the girls kicked.  She rested her hands on her 25 week baby belly for a second before walking upstairs. </p><p> “Maya,” she called, not sure where her wife was.  </p><p>“In the nursery,” Maya called.  </p><p>“Wow,” Carina said, walking in and finding not only the cribs, but also the rocker assembled with the dresser half way there as well, “How long was I asleep?”  </p><p>“Only about an hour and a half,” Maya said, “Did you know there are YouTube videos that explain all this stuff?” </p><p> “Good thinking,” Carina said as Maya stood up, walking over to her wife.  </p><p>“Well, Andy may have told me about it,” the blonde said, “I called her for advice on how to build a crib, and she said Robert just watched videos.  Turns out, it’s not as hard as I thought.”  </p><p>“Good,” Carina said, sitting down in the rocker, “This room is really coming together.  I was thinking, and if you hate it, we don’t have to, but we should get signs with their names on them for above their cribs.”  </p><p>“I think that’s an excellent idea,” Maya said, “Now all we have to do is name baby B and figure out their middle names.” </p><p> “We will,” Carina said, nodding as Maya continued working on the dresser.  </p><p>By the end of the afternoon, all the nursery furniture was together and ready for the babies.  Maya helped Carina put away the baby clothes in the dresser drawers.  </p><p>“These are so tiny,” Maya said as she put some onesies in a drawer, “Are they really going to be this small?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding, “Probably.  Maybe smaller depending on how early they are.  60% of twins are born premature so there is a good chance we are going to have very tiny babies.”  </p><p>“They need to stay in there for a good, long time,” Maya said, placing her hands on Carina’s belly, “Because if they are tinier than these onesies, I am going to be scared to hold them.”  </p><p>“You will not,” Carina said, laughing as she put her hands over Maya’s, “I guarantee I will not be able to get you to put them down, no matter how tiny they are.”  </p><p>“We’ll see,” Maya said, smiling as she looked up, kissing Carina.  </p><p>“Come on,” Carina said, “Let’s finish this.”  </p><p> </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, “So I think I have everything done that you need.  I did all the orders early this month so you shouldn’t have to worry about that and…” </p><p>“Maya,” Andy said, “Go.  We will be fine.  You and Carina are going out of town for four days, you are missing one shift.  I can handle it. Besides, who is going to take care of all of this when you are on maternity leave?  Go.  Enjoy your trip.  Pamper that wife of yours who is carrying your babies.  We will be fine here.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, nodding, “I know.  And if you need anything, I’ll just be a text or call away.”  </p><p>“We are going to be fine,” Andy said, pushing her toward the door, “Just like when you went on your honeymoon.  Wait, is that the last trip you went on?”  </p><p>“We went for a weekend to the mountains right before we started trying to have a baby,” Maya said, “But we didn’t have to take time off.  That was probably the last time.  We were going to go for our two year wedding anniversary, but Carina was like 10 weeks pregnant and too sick to be able to enjoy it.”  </p><p> “Well, now, she’s pregnant enough to not feel like puking all the time but not so pregnant that she’s too miserable to move,” Andy said, “So go enjoy some time with your wife because trust me when I tell you that after the babies are born, your relationship will never be the same.”  </p><p>“Thanks for covering for me, Andy,” Maya said, heading for the door.  </p><p>As she walked out of the station, she ran into the fire chief.  </p><p>“Chief Rodriguez,” Maya said, confused, “I’m sorry.  Did I forget about an appointment?” </p><p> “No,” the chief said, “But I was coming to talk to you?  I thought you were on shift?”  </p><p>“I took today off,” Maya said, “My wife and I are heading to Portland for a few days to get away before our girls are born.  Lieutenant Herrera is running point this shift.”  </p><p>“Do you have time for a quick chat?” Chief Rodriguez asked.  </p><p>“Sure,” Maya said, looking at her watch, seeing it was only 8 am and they didn’t plan to leave until 10, “We can talk in my office.”  </p><p>Maya walked into the station with her boss.  </p><p>“Lieutenant,” Maya said, knocking on the door, “Can we have the room, please?” </p><p> “Chief Rodriguez,” Andy said, shaking his hand, “Good morning sir.”  </p><p>“Good morning, Lieutenant,” the chief said, “When I am done with Captain Bishop, I need to speak with you as well.”  </p><p>“Yes sir,” Andy said, nodding as she walked out. </p><p> “Have a seat,” Maya said, gesturing to the seats in front of her desk, feeling very out of sorts in running clothes, “What can I do for you Chief?” </p><p> “Well, I wanted to come down here and formally tell you that we have made our choice for Battalion chief,” Chief Rodriguez said.  </p><p>Maya felt her heart rate speed up, trying to read the chief’s facial expressions.  </p><p>“I wanted to personally congratulate you, Captain Bishop,” the chief said, “We have decided that you are the best choice for chief of this battalion.”  </p><p>“Thank you sir,” Maya said, trying not to freak out at the news, “Thank you so much.” </p><p> “You have done incredible things with your station here,” Chief Rodriguez said, “And we expect you will do the same with the battalion.  You are welcome to take the office that Sullivan used when he was Battalion chief if you would like to stay in your house.” </p><p> “Thank you Sir,” Maya said, biting the inside of her cheek to keep showing her insane excitement.  </p><p>“We have also decided that Lieutenant Herrera will be promoted to Captain of this house,” Chief Rodriguez said, “And I was going to tell her after this.  You are welcome to stay for that.  I know you two are close.” </p><p> “Yes sir,” Maya said, “Would you like to me go get her?” </p><p> “Sure,” the chief said, watching the blonde get up and walk out of the office. </p><p> She returned a minute later with Andy.  </p><p>“Lieutenant,” the chief said, “Take a seat.” </p><p> Andy sat down next to the older man, looking between him and Maya.  </p><p>“Congratulations,” Chief Rodriguez said, “We have decided that when Captain Bishop is promoted to Battalion Chief at the beginning of the year, you will be promoted to Captain of Station 19.”  </p><p>“Thank you sir,” Andy said, throwing a quick glance at Maya before looking back at the chief.  </p><p>“We are going to make the formal announcement next week,” Chief Rodriguez said, “And we will discuss the particulars later as well, but I just wanted to inform you both.” </p><p> “Thank you sir,” both May and Andy said, standing up, shaking the Chief’s hand.  </p><p>“Enjoy your vacation, Captain Bishop,” the chief said, walking out.  </p><p>“Oh my god,” Andy said, turning and looking at her best friend, “Did that just happen? I didn’t even know you threw your hat in the ring for Battalion chief.”  </p><p>“I didn’t tell anyone,” Maya said, “Because it was such a long shot, and I didn’t want to deal with all the sad looks if I didn’t get it.  But with the babies coming and everything, being battalion chief will give me a little less risk of getting hurt and a little more time to be home with them at nights.”</p><p>  “That’s why I wanted captain, at least this time,” Andy said, nodding, “Not having both Luca’s parents running into fires all the time seems like a responsible thing to do.  And I would one day like the job I know you are gunning for too.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, smiling at her friend.  Their days of fighting for promotions against each other were over, both of them having realized it was better to fight for each other than with.  </p><p>“You need to go,” Andy said, “Carina is going to be mad if you are late.”  </p><p>“Woah, it’s already almost 9.  Yeah, I do need to go.  And so do you,” Maya said, “Congratulations again, Captain Herrera.”  </p><p>“You too, Battalion Chief Bishop,” Andy said, smiling, “Now go.  Enjoy time with your amazing wife.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, heading out the door and jogging home.  </p><p>“What took you so long?” a 29 weeks pregnant Carina asked as Maya came into the house, “It’s almost 9:30.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, giving her a small kiss, “Something came up at work that I will tell you about later.  Right now, I am going to grab a quick shower and then we can go.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, starting to pack their cooler for their trip.  Somehow, magically, they still hit the road at 9:58, Carina still impressed with how quickly her wife could get ready, even after over 5 years together.  </p><p>“So what happened at work?” Carina asked as they started driving.  </p><p>“We can talk about that later,” Maya said, shaking her head, “Right now, let’s try to think of a name for baby B.  We have three uninterrupted hours to do this, and then we don’t have to fight about it the whole trip.”  </p><p>“We haven’t been fighting about it,” Carina said, giving Maya a look. </p><p> “Ok, you’re right,” Maya said, “We have been either having heated discussions or ignoring it completely.  Either way, we need to figure it out.”  </p><p>“Fine,” Carina said, “What about Charlotte?”  </p><p>“Like the princess?” Maya said, scrunching her nose, “No way.” </p><p> “Fine,” Carina said, taking that one off her list, “How about Camilla?” </p><p> “Maybe,” Maya said, “Keep it on the list.  Oh, what about Robin?” </p><p> “I dated someone with that last name,” Carina said, shaking her head.  </p><p>“Oh, yeah, no,” Maya said.  </p><p>“We are naming baby A after my mom,” Carina said, “We could name baby B after your mom.”  </p><p>“First of all, we still see my mom so that would be confusing,” Maya said, “And Catherine is too much like Carina.  Too many of the same sounds.”  </p><p>“How about Nicole?” Carina asked.  </p><p>“I dated someone with that name,” Maya said, “And actually, Miller also dated her.”  </p><p>“Oh, I forgot about that,” Carina said, shaking her head.  </p><p>“Wait,” Maya said, “Remember that place we stayed on our honeymoon?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, confused, “We are not naming our child after a resort.”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, “Not that place.  The Air B&amp;B we stayed at on our way to our honeymoon, the name of the street it was on?”  </p><p>“Oh,” Carina said, “Si.  Oh, that would be the perfect name.” </p><p> “Did we just agree on the name of our second kid?” Maya said, smiling at her wife.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, “I think we did.”  </p><p>“Now for middle names,” Maya said, taking Carina’s hand and pressing a kiss to the back of it.  </p><p>They spent another hour talking about that, finally agreeing on a special set of middle names for their girls as they pulled into a rest area so Carina could use the bathroom, the twins pushing on her bladder more with each passing day.</p><p>  They made it to their place in Portland after two more stops, one of which Maya used to get them some lunch.  They arrived at their Air B&amp;B around 3, Carina exhausted.  </p><p>“Come on,” Maya said, guiding her into the house, “You need a nap.”  </p><p>“Only for a little bit,” Carina said sleepily, having come close to falling asleep in the car. </p><p> “Sleep as long as the girls let you,” Maya said, quickly finding the bedroom, “I will get the car unpacked.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, already almost asleep as Maya pulled off her shoes.  The blonde smiled, tucking a blanket lightly around her wife before going to unload their car.  </p><p>She brought in their bags and the groceries they had brought before deciding to start some dinner.  She decided to make some spaghetti, knowing Carina liked it.  She also decided to make tiramisu for dessert as a surprise.  She got the sauce going on the stove before starting on dessert. </p><p> About half way through her dessert making, she heard a toilet flush, and a minute later, Carina came out of the bedroom, rubbing her sleepy eyes.  </p><p>“Hey babe,” Maya said, wiping her hands on a towel before going to her wife, “Did you have a good nap?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding, “Are you making tiramisu?” </p><p>“I am,” Maya said, giving her a kiss, “I know it is one of your favorites.” </p><p> “I love you,” Carina said, smiling at her wife, “Can I help?”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, “Sit down.  Relax.  When I’m done here, I’ll rub your feet and we can watch trashy TV.” </p><p> “You are too good to me,” Carina said, shaking her head as she sat down on a barstool.  </p><p>“You are carrying our kids,” Maya said, shrugging, “This trip is all about spoiling you for that.”  </p><p>“This trip is for both of us,” Carina corrected, Maya giving her a small taste of the cream for the dessert, “For us to spend time together before Piccola and Patatina come.”  </p><p>“Should we start calling them by their actual names?” Maya asked as she layered the dessert together. </p><p> “No lo so,” Carina said, thinking, “Do you think we should?”  </p><p>“I think we should keep it a secret until they are born,” Maya said after a minute, “I like calling them Patatina and Piccola for now.”  </p><p>“I don’t think they are ever going to get rid of those nicknames,” Carina said, wincing a little as the babies kicked.  </p><p>“You alright?” Maya asked.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, “Just a little kicking and a Braxton-Hicks contraction.”  </p><p>“Are you sure they’re still just practice contractions?” Maya asked with concern as she put the tiramisu in the fridge.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding, “They are irregular.  I didn’t drink much today while we were driving so that’s probably part of it.”  </p><p>“Here,” Maya said, handing her a water bottle.</p><p>  The first time Carina had had a Braxton-Hicks contraction, she and Maya had been lying in bed, Maya’s arm slung around Carina’s waist, feeling the girls kick, when all of a sudden, Carina’s belly had tightened.  Carina insisted it was only a practice contraction, or Braxton Hick, but Maya freaked out.  </p><p>Carina calmed her down, sitting up and showing Maya that everything had relaxed.  When no more contractions came over the next hour, Maya calmed down, but still insisted on asking Danielle about it the next time they went to the doctor.  </p><p>“You know I am an OB, right?” Carina had asked in an annoyed tone when they left that appointment, “I know what is going on.  It is literally my job.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya had reassured her, “I’m sorry.  I just… I don’t know… I want the girls to be healthy and I’m not the baby expert.”  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, sighing, “But, Maya, I need you to trust me.  I want them to be healthy too, and I won’t do anything to risk that.”  </p><p>That had happened at 19 weeks and since then, Carina had gotten used to her uterus contracting pretty regularly as her due date got closer. </p><p>Often, she would have one every few hours, but sometimes, they were more frequent.  They weren’t painful yet and were more annoying than anything else.  </p><p>Once Maya was done in the kitchen, she guided Carina to the couch, rubbing her feet that were swollen from being in the car as they watched HGTV.  </p><p>After about an hour, Carina’s stomach grumbled.  </p><p>“I think the girls are hungry,” Carina said, laughing a little.  </p><p>“Are you ready for dinner?” Maya asked, “Or do you want something else?”  </p><p> “Dinner sounds good.  Although, these days, all food usually does,” Carina laughed and Maya knew it was true.  </p><p>Carina was always more of the foodie in their relationship, but since getting pregnant, she ate all the time.  </p><p>“I made spaghetti,” Maya said, “And I think it’s nice enough to eat on the porch if you want.” </p><p> “Sounds perfect,” Carina said as Maya pulled out plates and silverware.  </p><p>Maya dished up the food, handing Carina the plates as she went to grab something out of the bags.  Carina took the food out to the porch, smiling when she realized they could see the sunset from where they were going to sit.  The sun wouldn’t go down for another hour at least, but it was still beautiful.  </p><p>Maya came out a minute later with a bottle of sparkling cider and some wine glasses, along with two cups of water. </p><p> “Wow,” Carina said, “You pulled out all the stops tonight Captain Bishop.”  </p><p>“Well,” Maya said, “That’s actually part of the reason I did.” </p><p> “Cosa?” Carina said as Maya poured the cider into the glasses. </p><p> “I have some news,” Maya said, sitting down, “The reason I was so late getting home this morning was because Chief Rodriguez came to see me.”  </p><p>“Why?” Carina asked, concern filling her face.  </p><p>“Because your wife is no longer going to be Captain of Station 19,” Maya said, biting her lip.  </p><p>“Did you get fired?” Carina asked, worried until she saw Maya’s smile, “Wait, did you get the promotion?”  </p><p>“I did,” Maya said, a full smile breaking out on her face, “Come January, I will be Battalion Chief Maya Deluca-Bishop.”  </p><p>“Oh Bambina,” Carina said, getting up and giving Maya a kiss as the blonde stood too, “Congratulations.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Maya said, arms wrapped around Carina’s neck, “And Andy will be the new captain so our dreams of running the station are coming true.”  </p><p>“I am so proud of you Maya,” Carina said, kissing her again, “You are going to be an amazing battalion chief.” </p><p> They stood there for a minute, just enjoying being wrapped in each other’s arms before going back to their dinner.</p><p> They sat on the porch for the next hour and a half, and probably would have stayed longer, but they both realized spaghetti and a fizzy drink had been a bad idea for dinner when Carina started having terrible heartburn. </p><p>“I’m so sorry,” Maya said as she came back from the store she had run to to grab the tums they both had forgotten for this trip to find Carina on the couch with tears in her eyes.  </p><p>“It’s ok,” Carina said, accepting the tablets from Maya, chewing them, “I guess I will be avoiding tomatoes for the rest of this pregnancy.”  </p><p>Maya got Carina a cool rag, putting it on the back of her neck, something that was weirdly calming when her heartburn got this bad. </p><p> “I feel so sick,” Carina moaned as they sat there, her head on Maya’s shoulder.  </p><p>“I’m sorry babe,” Maya said, kissing her forehead, “Let’s put on some of that trashy TV and we can just chill for the rest of the night.”  </p><p>The next three hours were rough as Carina rode out the heartburn, almost getting sick twice, but managing to keep dinner where it belonged. </p><p> “You two better be less trouble when you come out,” Carina said, rubbing her hand over her belly as they got ready for bed, the heartburn finally easing enough that they could go to bed.  </p><p>“Babe, they are two girls,” Maya said, shaking her head as she grabbed her toothbrush, “They are going to be giving us heartburn for the rest of our lives.”  </p><p>The rest of the trip was much more relaxing than the first night.  </p><p>Maya had booked them a couples massage, found a pregnancy yoga class, and made them reservations at one of Portland’s nicest restaurants.  They also spent plenty of time just enjoying being together, curled up in front of the fireplace or in bed in their Air B&amp;B, enjoying what they knew would be some of their last quiet moments together before the twins were born.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  I think I need at least one, maybe two more chapters before the girls are born so if you have any ideas, let me know!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Not Easy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hey everyone! I'm sorry it's been so long since I updated.  I am currently taking the last 3 classes I have left before I can officially start my masters program in the fall and they are kicking my butt and taking all my time so updates on all my stuff is probably going to be slow for the next 2 months until those are over.  Now, on with the story!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The station was having their annual pancake breakfast to raise money for Christmas gifts for a local group home.  They had the breakfast the weekend before Halloween, every October in order to give the group home enough time to get everything they needed.  They normally had a good turnout from the community, everyone always wanting to rally to give kids who were in the shittest situation at Christmas, a slightly better time. </p><p>A shift was working the shift before the breakfast and then staying to help with it.  Their shift had been long and traumatic, with back to back calls the entire time with the last call of their shift involving a home burning completely to the ground with an entire family trapped inside.  </p><p>They were all worn thin by the time they got back, having gotten no sleep and feeling the pain of the loss deeply.  They had done everything they could to get the family out, but by the time they found them, no one was breathing, and the thirty minutes of CPR they tried proved to be useless.  </p><p>No one wanted to do anything but go either drink or hug their families, but they all knew how important the pancake breakfast was so they rallied as best as they could and got to work. </p><p> </p><p>Maya was in her office, finishing up her paperwork from the call, her head pounding with the grief of the day, when there was a knock on her door.  </p><p>“What?” she snapped, not wanting to have to work on this case any longer than she had to.  </p><p>“What’s wrong?” Carina asked as she walked in, closing the door behind her. </p><p> “Nothing,” Maya said, shaking her head, “Or nothing I want to talk about now.  Just a shitty shift.  What are you doing here?”</p><p>  “I’m here to help with the pancake breakfast,” Carina said, walking over to Maya and planting a kiss on her forehead.</p><p>  “You don’t need to,” Maya sighed, having already had this discussion about half a dozen times with her wife, “You’re 30 weeks pregnant.  You should be resting.” </p><p> “I am fine, Bambina,” Carina said, “I had my check up yesterday, and everything looks good.  My blood pressure is normal, the babies are still nice and cozy and not trying to come any time soon.  I told you all of this yesterday.  I have helped with the pancake breakfast for the past three years, and just because I’m pregnant, I’m not going to stop.”  </p><p>“Fine,” Maya said, “B shift was supposed to get the barn set up, but I’m sure there’s still plenty of cooking to do because no one on that shift likes cooking.” </p><p> “You need a shower,” Carina said, wrinkling her nose.  </p><p>“I’ll come with you,” Maya said, “I can shower later.”  </p><p>“No offence, Bambina, but you actually want people to give you money this morning, right?” Carina said, raising an eyebrow, “If you smell like that, you are going to make them run.” </p><p> “Fine,” Maya said, rolling her eyes at her wife playfully, “I’ll take you to the beanery where the cooking should be happening and then I will go shower.”  </p><p>Maya took Carina up to the beanery where Montgomery promptly put her on fruit cutting duty which made Maya happy because she had to sit to do it because the counters were covered in pancakes and bacon.</p><p>The blonde went into the showers, trying desperately to scrub the smell of their last fire off her body and out of her hair, but the screams from the neighbors they heard when they carried the bodies of the family out of the house wouldn’t leave her head.  There were fires that were harder than others, and this one was really hard for Maya.  </p><p>She managed to pull herself together, at least a little, before getting out of the shower, changing her clothes before heading to help her team.  She smiled when she walked into the beanery, finding Carina still cutting up fruit at the table while chatting with Vic and Travis who were on pancake duty. </p><p> “Hey, Cap,” Travis said, smiling at Maya, “Carina was just telling us about the trip you guys took last month since you are always, conveniently, too busy to tell us anything.” </p><p> “Yeah, like how you screamed when you saw a snake on the porch,” Vic laughed, flipping another pancake into the warming box.  </p><p>“In my defense, it was almost dark and I was not expecting it and I can give you both bathroom duty indefinitely,” Maya said, glaring at them. </p><p>Vic and Travis held their hands up in surrender as they continued making pancakes.  </p><p>“I’m going to head down to the barn to make sure everything going as planned, “Maya said before looking at Carina, “You good up here?”  </p><p>“I’m fine Bella,” Carina said, nodding as she squeezed Maya’s hand gently, “Go do your captainly duties.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya nodded before looking at her friends, “And you two, no more poking her for stories about me.”  </p><p>Maya left the beanery with a smile as she heard her wife and friends laughing behind her.  She went downstairs and got to work helping finish with setup and getting the food ready to serve.  People started coming by, and before Maya knew what was going on, almost two hours had passed and she had yet to see her wife.  </p><p>“Vic,” she said, going up to her friend, “Where’s Carina?”  </p><p>“She said she was going to go to the bathroom and then come down,” Vic said, brow furrowing, “But that was almost an hour ago.  Do you want me to go look…”</p><p> Before Vic had even finished, Maya was tearing out of the barn.  She ran upstairs, not finding her wife in the bathrooms, beanery, or longue.  She then went into her office, letting out a sigh of relief when she saw Carina in her bunk, sound asleep on her bed.  She smiled, walking in and just looking at her wife.  </p><p>“Stop staring,” Carina mumbled, eyes opening a little. </p><p> “I can’t admire how beautiful my wife is when she’s asleep?” Maya chuckled, sitting down on the bed next to her.  </p><p>“I am not feeling particularly beautiful these days,” Carina groaned, sitting up.  </p><p>“You are literally growing our children in your body,” Maya said, wrapping her arms around Carina, “You have never been more beautiful than you are now.”  </p><p>Carina smiled, leaning on Maya. </p><p> “I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” the brunette said, rubbing her eyes, “I was just going to come lay down for a minute before going to the breakfast, but I guess I was more tired than I thought.”  </p><p>“That’s ok,” Maya said, shrugging, “I’m glad you got some rest.”  </p><p>“We should probably get back to the breakfast,” Carina said, “After all, the future Battalion Chief should probably be there.”  </p><p>“You’re probably right,” Maya said, nodding, but making no moves to get up. </p><p> “Is everything ok Bambina?” Carina asked, noticing a slight pinching in her wife’s brow.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, “Or, it will be.  I don’t have time for it not to be right now.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, taking Maya’s hand.  She knew it wasn’t healthy to push whatever was wrong down, but for now, she was willing to let it slide because this was important to the station.  They went into the barn, hand in hand.  </p><p>They ended up getting separated fairly quickly when Maya got pulled into a conversation with one of the wealthier people from around the station, and Carina went to grab some food.  The people in the neighborhood were fairly familiar with all the firefighters at 19, and especially Captain Bishop so they were all thrilled when they saw Carina was expecting.  </p><p>“You two will make the best moms,” Edna, an older woman who was a fairly frequent visitor of the station said, touching Carina’s pregnant belly.  </p><p>Carina tried not to show how uncomfortable she was, but as it continued to happen with the hoard of other older women who lived near the station, she got fed up with it, sneaking off to Maya’s office after a while to just be alone. </p><p> As the event wore down and everyone started cleaning up, Maya made an executive decision after seeing how worn out everyone who had worked the night before looked.  </p><p>“Alright, everyone from C and D shift, you are on clean up,” she said, “A shift, go home.  You all look like hell.”  </p><p>“You need to go home too, Maya,” Andy said, walking up to her best friend, “I know that call was hard on me, and I can’t even imagine what I must have been like for you.  Take your wife home and decompress.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, taking the money they had made back to her office, finding Carina sitting in her desk chair.  </p><p>“Hey,” Maya said, locking the money in the safe before going to her wife, putting her hands on her shoulder.  </p><p>“Don’t touch me,” Carina snapped, glaring at her wife. </p><p> “Woah,” Maya said, removing her hands immediately, “What’s wrong?” </p><p> “Sorry,” Carina said with a sigh, “Sorry.  I just had my belly touched by all the old ladies who are always at these things and I don’t think I have ever been so uncomfortable in my life.  They didn’t not even ask if it was ok with me.”  </p><p>“Oh, babe,” Maya said, “I am so sorry.  You should have said something or told me.” </p><p> “I know,” Carina said, clearly frustrated with herself, “I just did not want to be rude because they are all so nice, but I already feel gross and being touched by people who are basically strangers made it worse and I didn’t want to cause a scene.” </p><p> “Next time, tell me and I will make a scene for you,” Maya said, clearly angry, “You have a right to your personal space.”  </p><p>“Can we just go home?” Carina asked, feeling drained from the event, “I have to work at 7 tonight, and I don’t want to spend our time off together in your office.  Unless you still need to do something?” </p><p> “No,” Maya said, shaking her head, reaching out her hand to help Carina up, “No.  I sent A shift home, and Andy told me I needed to leave to, and she’s not wrong.”  </p><p>“Ready to talk about it?” carina asked as they walked out to the car. </p><p> “When we get home,” Maya nodded, climbing into the driver’s seat.  </p><p>They drove the short trip home, Maya grabbing her bag out of the back seat before they both walked inside.  </p><p>“Can we go lay in bed?” Carina asked, just needing to be comfortable after the nearly two hours she spent getting touched by strangers.  </p><p>“Of course,” Maya said, nodding, “We worked the entire night last night so I’m probably going to need a nap at some point, although I’m not sure that’s gonna happen.”  </p><p>The brunette headed upstairs, deciding to wait to push her wife until they were both more relaxed.  Maya followed her upstairs a few minutes later with water for both of them and some dried fruit and granola for when Carina inevitably got hungry. </p><p> “Thank you Bambina,” Carina said, smiling as Maya set the items down.  </p><p>“Of course,” Maya said, offering an exhausted smile.  </p><p>The blonde changed while the pregnant woman went to use the bathroom before they both climbed into bed.  </p><p>“The girls are really moving,” Carina said, shifting a little, trying to get comfortable.  </p><p>“Can I?” Maya asked, gesturing to Carina’s belly.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, confused as to why her wife was asking her to do something she normally just did before the doctor realized what was going on, “Oh, Bambina.  I don’t mind when you touch my bump.  Actually, I love when you do, but really, only you.  I was uncomfortable today because people I did not invite into my personal space feel like they can enter it because I am pregnant.  When they do it, it feels uncomfortable and gross, but when you do it, it makes me feel like all four of us are more connected.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, putting her hands on Carina’s moving belly, smiling when she felt the twins kick and punch at her hands.  Before she knew what was happening, though, the smile turned into tears which turned into sobs.  Carina didn’t say anything, just pulling Maya close. </p><p> “Sorry,” Maya said after a while as the tears slowed, “I didn’t mean to do that.”</p><p>  “Maya, you have been holding something in all day,” Carina said, running her hands through Maya’s hair, “And I understand why because I know how important the fundraiser is to the station, but Bambina, we are home now.  It’s just me.  Tell me what happened.”  </p><p>“There was a house fire,” Maya said with a sigh, “A bad one.  Everyone was stuck inside, and we tried to get them out.  I went in with them but my tank wasn’t working correctly so Vic and I had to wait an extra minute and by the time we got in and found the toddler, he was barely breathing.  We took him outside and I worked on him with Travis, but we couldn’t get him back.  He died in my arms. If my stupid tank would have just been working, maybe, we could have gotten him out in time.”  </p><p>“Oh, Maya,” Carina said, pulling her wife close, “That must have been terrible, but Bambina, it is not your fault.”  </p><p>“It’s the first time a kid has ever died in front of me,” Maya said quietly, “Sure, adults have, and I’ve seen it happen to kids in fires or that my team was working on, but this one, I was holding his little hand when he died.  I just… it was…” </p><p> “I know,” Carina said, having been there for the last moments of more people, including children, than she cared to think about during the course of the pandemic a few years earlier.  </p><p>“I love my job, but sometimes, I can’t wait to be battalion chief and be off calls like this,” Maya said with a sigh, “I think a lot about how much I’m going to miss being in the field actively every day, but then days like today happen.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, just pulling Maya closer, kissing her forehead.  They sat there for another few minutes, Maya going back to feeling the babies moving before she yawned. </p><p> “You need to sleep,” Carina said, “Did you get any rest on shift?”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, “It was back to back calls.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, moving so Maya way laying down, “Well, I am exhausted too because the girls are taking all my energy so let’s try to nap?” </p><p> Maya nodded, moving closer to Carina as they both fell asleep.  However, for Maya, the sleep lasted all of twenty minutes before she woke up, heart racing from a nightmare.  Carina was still out cold so Maya slipped out of bed, needing to clear her head and calm down.  </p><p>In her dream, there had been another fire, but instead of it being the little boy from the night before, it was her daughters, or at least two little girls that in her dream were her daughters, and she held their little hands just like the little boy.  </p><p>It was terrible and for a second when she first woke up, Maya though she might be sick.  She went downstairs, making herself a cup of coffee and curling up on the couch.  Carina found her an hour later, just sitting on the couch, staring at the wall.  </p><p>“Maya,” the brunette said cautiously, “Are you alright?” </p><p> “Sorry,” Maya said, coming out of her daze, “Sorry.  Just thinking.” </p><p> “About what?” Carina asked, sitting down next to her.  </p><p>“About this stupid dream I had,” Maya said, blinking to keep the tears away, “It was like the fire from last shift, but instead of the little boy, it was the girls, Piccola and Patatina and I couldn’t protect them and I held their hands as they…”  </p><p>“Oh, Bambina,” Carina said, pulling Maya close, “I cannot promise nothing like that will ever happen, because we both know that freak accidents cannot be controlled, but Maya, we will do our best to protect them, and trust that that will be enough.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, nodding, “I know that, and most of the time, I believe that too, but apparently, my unconscious mind doesn’t want to let me believe that.” </p><p> “The sleeping brain is sometimes a mean place,” Carina nodded, knowing both of them struggled with nightmares that were pretty terrible sometimes. </p><p> They sat on the couch together for a few minutes, both trying not to think about all the terrible things that they had seen happen to children.  </p><p>Finally, Maya broke herself out of her spiraling thoughts, something that had taken her years to learn how to do, and looked at her wife, “Come on.  Let’s go out back and enjoy the weirdly warm October afternoon.”  </p><p>“That sounds like an excellent idea,” Carina nodded, reaching for Maya’s hand to pull her up.  </p><p>As they sat in their back yard, Maya rubbing Carina’s feet, both of them tried hard to think about all the amazing memories they could make in this yard instead of all the terrifying fears that had been plaguing them earlier.  </p><p> </p><p> </p><p> By Thanksgiving, Carina was nearing the 34th week of her pregnancy and was starting to feel it.  She was still working, because according to her OB, the twins were happily nestled in her uterus with no plans to leave any time soon, and Carina wanted to save as much time as she could to be off one the girls were born.  </p><p>She was still floored by America’s maternity leave policy because in Italy, women could take a year or more to be with their new babies.  Twelve weeks wasn’t even three months, and she wanted to use all of it for once she had two babies in her arms.  </p><p>They had worked it out so that Maya would take two weeks off whenever the babies came from her PTO she had saved up to help get everything settled, then she would go back to work while Carina was off.  </p><p>Once Carina went back to work, Maya was going to take maternity leave so the girls would be close to six months old before they were both back to working full time. </p><p> Today, however, Carina was not thinking about maternity leave.  Instead, she was in the kitchen with her wife as they were getting ready to leave to go to Andy and Robert’s for Thanksgiving.  </p><p>Carina and Maya had spent the morning making three crostatas, or more accurately, Carina had been giving Maya instructions on how to make it because the blonde insisted she could help and that Carina needed to rest.  </p><p>Normally, the Italian would have fought her, but she had spent the better part of the past week fighting a cold that had been going around the hospital, and she was still tired.  Shockingly to both of them, Maya ended up doing a really good job, and all three desserts had turned out beautifully.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, “I think I’m ready.  Are you sure you feel ok enough to go?  We can always just stay home, curl up on the couch, and relax if you want to.”  </p><p>“You just don’t want to share your perfect crostatas,” Carina said, giving Maya a look, “I am fine.  Really.  I mean, I am tired, but I have two babies who are consuming a lot of my energy at the moment.  Let’s go.”</p><p>  As they stepped out of the house, Maya’s brow furrowed at the car that was in their driveway.  </p><p>“Oh, hell no,” she said, eyes wide with rage, “Not today.” </p><p> “Who is…” Carina started only to watch as the door to the car opened and Maya’s father stepped out, “Oh.” </p><p> “Lane,” Maya said, stepping toward him, “You need to leave.”  </p><p>“Come on,” he said, “Is that any way to talk to your dad on Thanksgiving?” </p><p> “You need to leave,” Maya repeated, trying to keep her cool.  </p><p>“So it’s true,” he said, glancing around his daughter at Carina, “The woman you are with is really knocked up.  What, were you not good enough for her so she went and cheated on you?”  </p><p>“They are our kids,” Maya said, trying to keep her anger from exploding, “Together.”  </p><p>“So I’m going to be a grandpa?” he asked, raising an eyebrow, “To some other woman’s babies?  That’s rich.”   </p><p>“No,” Maya spat, “You are not.  You are never coming anywhere near my kids.”  </p><p>“Can you even call them your kids?” Lane countered, raising an eyebrow, “I mean, your wife or life partner or whatever other idiotic name you two have come up with is their real mom, right?” </p><p> “Go to hell,” Maya said, shaking her head, “They are our kids, and you will have no part of them.  You need to leave… NOW.” </p><p> “I am so disappointed in you, kid,” Lane said in his scary, flat voice, “I always had dreams of you growing up and having a husband and a couple of kids who could follow in your footsteps to the Olympics, and instead, you have decided to play house with this woman, you are out of shape, and you think you are somehow going to be what?  Some kind of step mom to these kids?”  </p><p>“Mr. Bishop, you need to leave,” Carina said, walking up next to her wife, “Maya has asked you several times, and if we have to ask again, I will call the police.”</p><p>  “Oh, look at you now, Maya,” Mr. Bishop said, “Now you need this woman to fight your battles.  Come on.  You are so weak and pathetic and…”</p><p>Before he could finish, Maya took the dessert that was in her hands and threw it, plate and all, at him.  The plate missed him, shattering on the driveway, but he ended up covered in sticky Italian tart.  </p><p>“Leave,” Maya said, voice shaking with rage, “Now.”  </p><p>He was going to protest, but Carina pulled out her phone and he conceded, getting back in his car and speeding off. </p><p> “Let’s go inside, Bambina,” Carina said gently, putting a hand on her shaking wife’s back.  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, “No, we need to get to Andy’s.  Come on.  We are going to be late.” </p><p> “Maya,” Carina said, “We don’t have to go.  We can stay here.  It’s ok.” </p><p> “No,” Maya said again, “No.  Come on.  Let’s go.”  </p><p>Carina sighed but knew that Maya was shutting down on her right now, and that fighting with her when she was like this was absolutely useless.  Carina knew she herself got like this too when she was overwhelmed to a point that Maya just had.  Carina’s own father had passed during the pandemic, but there were times when her brother’s meds would get unbalanced and he would get like that, mean and lashing out at everyone.  Carina knew that at some point, maybe later today or that week, Maya would be ready to process what had just happened, but pushing her to do it before she was ready did not ever end well.  </p><p>They drove to Andy and Robert’s house in silence, Carina holding Maya’s hand as the blonde drove, eyes squinted and body tense.  They arrived at the Herrera Sullivan house right on time, Maya helping her wife out of the car.  </p><p>“If you need to leave early, just let me know,” Maya said, offering a pinched smile. </p><p> “You too,” Carina said meaningfully, just rubbing her thumb on the back of Maya’s hand.  </p><p>They walked up to the door, Andy opening it a moment after they knocked.  </p><p>“Come on in,” she said, stepping aside, “I can take those.  Wow, Carina, they look great.”  </p><p>“Maya actually made them this year,” Carina said, handing Andy the plate she was holding. </p><p> “No way,” Andy said, looking down at the pastry.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding as she slipped off her shoes.  </p><p>“Nicely done Maya,” the hostess said.  </p><p>Maya half answered before walking away.  Carina went to use the bathroom and when she came back, she didn’t see her wife.  </p><p>“She’s playing with Luca and Pru in the playroom,” Travis said, walking up to Carina, “Which is still so crazy to me because she always tried to avoid kids, but now she chooses to spend time with them instead of us.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, half smiling because she knew that while, yes, Maya did love the kids, that it was probably more part of her coping with how she was feeling right now.  Carina decided to give her wife the space she was looking for and, after grabbing a glass of water, she sat down next to Vic.  </p><p>About an hour later, Maya came wandering into the living room, sitting down next to Carina.  </p><p>“Hey Maya,” Vic said, smiling at her friend, “Happy Thanksgiving.”  </p><p>“Happy Thanksgiving,” the blonde said, nodding. </p><p> Carina glanced at her wife, Maya giving her a small, reassuring smile.  Carina just took her hand before turning back to Vic.  </p><p>Soon enough, it was time for dinner.  They all sat down, everyone chatting happily as they passed food around the table.  </p><p>“That’s all you’re eating?” Andy said, looking at Maya’s plate that only had a little food on it, “It’s Thanksgiving.”  </p><p>“I’m not hungry,” Maya shrugged, picking up a fork.  </p><p>“Come on, Captain,” Ben said, “You didn’t even take any of my famous cheesy potatoes.”  </p><p>“I said I’m not hungry,” Maya snapped, pushing back her chair, “I need to use the bathroom.”  </p><p>Everyone was silent as she left before looking at Carina.  </p><p>“I… It… I’m going to go check on her,” Carina said, getting up from the table.  </p><p>Carina slowly walked down the hall to the bathroom, knowing what had set her wife off.  Her dad had commented on her weight earlier, something Maya was beyond self-conscious of that had created such an unhealthy relationship with food.  The blonde had worked hard in therapy on this, but having someone tell you that you were out of shape was pretty triggering.   Carina took a breath before walking up to the door, knocking gently. </p><p>“Maya,” she called, “It’s me.  Can I come in?” </p><p> She heard the door unlock and took that as a yes.  </p><p>“Oh babe,” Carina said, walking in and finding her wife sitting on the toilet, tears running down face, “Come here.”  </p><p>The blonde stood, just letting her wife hold her as tears streamed down her cheeks.  </p><p>“I just…” Maya tried to say, finding it almost impossible to get a full breath, “He said… I don’t…”</p><p> “Hey,” Carina said, moving Maya so she was looking at her, “Maya, eyes right here.”</p><p>  The blonde took a while, but eventually, she called down.  </p><p>“Ok,” Carina said, “This is what we are going to do.  I am going to go out there, tell everyone you weren’t eating because you are sick, and then we are going to go home and talk about this.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, knowing her wife was right. </p><p> “Alright,” Carina said, “I will meet you at the front door?”  </p><p>Maya nodded again, rubbing her eyes.  Carina left the bathroom, everyone staring at her as she walked back into the dining room.  </p><p>“Maya isn’t feeling well,” the brunette said with a sigh, “I’m sorry, but we are going to head out.” </p><p> “Let me make you a plate of food to take with you,” Andy offered and Carina nodded, knowing better than to try to refuse food from her wife’s best friend.  </p><p>Andy walked with Carina to the front door, finding Maya already there, shoes on, arms crossed.  </p><p>“I hope you feel better,” Andy said, although both of them knew that Andy knew Maya wasn’t sick.  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya mumbled.  </p><p>“Thank you for dinner,” Carina said, Andy handing her the plate.  </p><p>“Of course,” Andy said, “Let me know if you guys need anything.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Carina said as they left. </p><p> “I’m driving,” Carina said, putting out her hands for the keys.</p><p>  “I’m fine to drive,” Maya said.  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, “No, I am driving.”  </p><p>Maya was too drained to fight anymore so she handed over her keys, climbing into the passenger seat.  They drove home, heading inside, Maya going directly upstairs.  </p><p>Carina decided she needed to eat something because the girls were demanding it so she grabbed some frozen fruit, making herself a smoothie, deciding to save the Thanksgiving food for when Maya was feeling better. </p><p> She drank some of the smoothie, bringing the rest of it with her upstairs.  She found Maya laying in their bed, dressed in pajamas, staring at the ceiling.  Carina quickly changed her own clothes before climbing into bed next to her wife.  </p><p>“You know everything he said today was total bullshit, right?” Carina said, laying on her side both to face her wife and because it was the only comfortable position for her body at this point in her pregnancy.  </p><p>“Logically, yes,” Maya nodded, “But… I don’t know…”  </p><p>“It still hurts,” Carina said, nodding, “These girls, they are ours.  Not just mine, not just yours, but ours, and we are going to raise them to know that we both love them so much.  And I love you so much.” </p><p> “I love you too,” Maya said, “I’m sorry I snapped at dinner tonight.” </p><p> “You had a rough day,” Carina said, brushing a piece of hair off Maya’s forehead, “I mean, I wish you would have just stayed home and let me take care of you.” </p><p> “I thought I would be ok enough to make it through Thanksgiving,” Maya sighed, “I thought I was over letting him have this kind of power over me.”  </p><p>“Maya, I don’t know if you can ever get over this,” Carina said, “I know I never did with my papa.  I would work so hard, and every time he came into town, I would be back in the same place.  And you have gotten so much better at dealing with this.  You are letting me be here with you.  And you are talking about it.  And even if it is still impossibly hard when he pulls what he did today, you know that is not who you are.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, letting Carina hold her as she promised herself, over and over again in her head that she would never make her daughters feel like this, ever.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>There it was! What did you think?  I'm thinking maybe in the next chapter, we should finally meet these babies?  Are you ready?  AS always, any ideas for this or other stories are always welcome!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. They're Here</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Ok, so I know I said it would be a while between updates, but then I remembered, I had already written this chapter close to a month ago so I decided to share it with you all tonight!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They decided not to make any plans with anyone for Christmas.  By that point, Carina was 38 weeks pregnant, and the girls could literally come at any time.  They didn’t want to make plans because they didn’t want to have to cancel them last minute. </p><p> Also, Carina was to a point that she was extremely uncomfortable all the time.  Her back ached from all the extra baby weight, her feet and ankles often were swollen and sore by the afternoon, she wasn’t sleeping more than an hour at a time, breathing was getting harder as the girls grew, and her heartburn was to the point that she thought she was going to throw up at least twice a day.  </p><p>She was also having Braxton-Hicks contractions often, but when she went for her appointment on December 22, she wasn’t even one centimeter dilated so the contractions were for practice and nothing more.  </p><p>She had officially gone on maternity leave on Christmas Eve, and somehow, Maya had managed to get Christmas Day off this year, so their plan was to spend a quiet day together unless the girls decided to show up.  </p><p>“I am officially done working until after these bambinas are born,” Carina said, walking through the door at 7 pm on Christmas Eve.  </p><p>“Welcome home,” Maya said, smiling as she walked up to her wife, wrapping her arms around her and kissing her deeply.  </p><p>“It smells good in here,” Carina said, pulling away, “What are you cooking?”  </p><p>“I just made some simple soup,” Maya said, shrugging, “Hopefully, it won’t make the heartburn worse.  I was going to make lasagna because I know it’s Deluca family tradition, but I know tomatoes are really not agreeing with you these days so I thought I would make that after the girls are born instead so you could enjoy it.” </p><p> “Thank you Bella,” Carina said, “You are always so thoughtful.” </p><p> “I try,” Maya said, shrugging, “Now, go change into something more comfortable, while I finish dinner, and then we can curl up and watch all those cheesy Christmas movies you love.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, going upstairs to their room while Maya went back into the kitchen.  The pregnant woman smiled when she saw a gift on the bed that said “open me on Christmas Eve” on the tag.  </p><p>“Maya,” Carina called downstairs, “Am I supposed to open this?”  </p><p>The next thing Carina heard was footsteps coming up the stairs.</p><p>  “Oh, yeah,” Maya said, nodding, “I forgot.  Go ahead.”  </p><p>Carina opened the package, finding a new pair of pajamas in the box, along with a box of Carina’s favorite tea and her favorite Christmas movie on DVD.  </p><p>“So Andy was telling me the other day that they get Luca a Christmas Eve box every year and they give him pajamas, and a Christmas book, and a Christmas movie and a special snack, and I thought it might be fun to do with Piccola and Patatina, and I had pajamas and a book for them this year, but clearly they are enjoying a relaxing Christmas Eve without us so I thought I would spoil you a little this year instead, and start it with them next year,” Maya said, biting on her lip, not sure what Carina would think.</p><p> “Oh Bambina,” Carina said, tears filling her eyes which she 100% blamed on the hormones of late pregnancy, “I love that idea.”  </p><p>Carina knew that Christmas had never been something Maya enjoyed before they were together, and watching her be excited about the holiday made Carina’s heart soar.</p><p> The traditions in the Bishop house on Christmas were not at all something Maya looked forward to as a kid.  While her friends were eating special breakfasts and opening presents, she was out on the track with her dad, running laps because no one else was there on Christmas morning so it was the perfect time to train according to Lane. </p><p> They also never got presents that weren’t clothes or shoes because that would only discourage them from training which would make them lazy losers.  Maya hated Christmas because 100% of the time, there was an epic screaming match between her parents, and more years than not, this meant that Maya had to run extra because her mom would stop arguing, meaning Lane needed somewhere to put his rage, and for whatever reason, that place was always her.</p><p>  Once she became a firefighter, she always worked on Christmas, allowing her coworkers with families and children to spend the day with them.  </p><p>The first Christmas she and Carina were together was in the middle of a pandemic, and both of them worked that day because it was all hands on deck.  However, Carina had insisted on decorating the apartment, something Maya had never done in her entire life because what was the point. </p><p> Carina loved Christmas because before her mom and Andrea moved to the States, it was a time that her mom would teach her how to bake, and she and Andrea would help decorate cookies, and put up the tree, and dance around to holiday music. </p><p> Once her parents split, Christmas was the time of year Carina was sent to the US to be with her mom and brother which made it the only two weeks of solace she got often.  They would go ice skating and bake Italian desserts for the neighbors and attend candle light Mass which was the one time Carina enjoyed church.  Christmas was filled with the happiest memories Carina had of her mom, and after she died, it felt like a part of her was still there at the holidays.  </p><p>Having the apartment full of Christmas things was overwhelming to Maya, and she had snapped at Carina within two days.  Carina had looked incredibly hurt when Maya called the apartment a Christmas explosion that hurt her eyes.  </p><p>Maya had stopped, taken a few deep breaths, and finally talked to Carina about why she felt the way she did about Christmas.  The Italian woman had listened patiently, telling Maya she understood where she was coming from, but also explaining why Christmas was so important to her.  Tears were shed by both of them, but they ended up compromising, Carina agreeing to keep all but a few Maya-approved decorations out of the bedroom while Maya agreed she could put up as much as she wanted in the living room.  </p><p>The next year, once vaccines had been distributed, and the world felt a little less like the walls were falling in on them, Carina had suggested they start some of their own traditions.  She taught Maya how to make her mom’s traditional Italian cookies and Maya took Carina to a Christmas light show that she had found thanks to Andy and Vic.  </p><p>The following year, they were engaged and spent Christmas in Italy.  That year had been beyond stressful for both Maya and Carina because it was the first time Maya met any of Carina’s family, except her brother, in person.  The pandemic had made traveling so tricky, causing them to put off traveling to Carina’s home country.  After several mental breakdowns from both of them, they agreed on the plane ride home that they would never again spend the holidays in Italy, deciding some other time of year would be better because Carina’s family was enough without the extra stress of a holiday.  </p><p>They had managed to keep up a few traditions the following year, but an unfortunate five alarm fire at a set of buildings that included a birthing center had them both working the entirety of Christmas day and Christmas eve.  </p><p>Last year, Carina had been pregnant at Christmas time, and pretty miserable because of it.  Then, they lost the baby and that felt like the end of Christmas.  </p><p>This year, they had both been expecting to have two newborns on Christmas morning, but unless the girls got moving, they would be spending a quiet Christmas with just the two of them.  </p><p>“Go change,” Maya said, planting a gentle kiss on Carina’s lips, “I’ll have dinner ready when you’re done.”  </p><p>Carina nodded as Maya left the room.  Carina put on the pajamas Maya had gotten her before heading downstairs.  She was exhausted and sat down on the couch.  Maya brought two bowls of soup over to the couch.  </p><p>“Would you like me to make you some tea?” Maya asked, handing Carina her food.  </p><p>“Not yet,” Carina said, shaking her head, “Come sit.” </p><p> “Let me put the movie in first,” Maya said, going over to their DVD player and putting in It’s a Wonderful Life before sitting down next to her wife.  </p><p>They spent the rest of the night on the couch, Carina dozing on Maya’s shoulder after a while, exhausted from her pregnancy and her last day of work.  </p><p>Maya sat there, rubbing her wife’s back, thinking that she didn’t even know it was possible to be as happy as she felt right now for most of her life and looking forward to all the Christmases to come that they were going to get to spend with their daughters.  </p><p> </p><p>Christmas came and went, and the twins were still happily in Carina’s belly, much to her chagrin.  She knew that inside was the best place for the girls, but she was now 39 weeks pregnant with two humans who really enjoyed punching and kicking her in both the lungs and the bladder, making breathing difficult and causing her to pee her pants on more than one occasion.  She knew that at this point, the babies would be just fine if they came, and she was hoping they would decide to do it soon. </p><p>She had another doctor’s appointment on the 29th and was told that the girls were still happy and not attempting to escape yet, although both of them were now head down which meant Carina would hopefully be able to have the natural birth she wanted.  </p><p>Maya was starting to drive her up the wall with all her worrying, and Carina could not have been happier that Maya had a shift on December 30th that she was going to work because the girls still showed no signs that they were ready to be evicted from their cozy home in their mamma’s belly.  It was Maya’s last shift before her official promotion and Carina was happy her wife was going to be able to be there with her team one last time before everything changed.  </p><p>Carina spent the bulk of that day resting, missing Maya’s massaging hands on her back and feet because even though her wife was making her crazy, she still enjoyed the time they had together.  </p><p> She went to bed early, absolutely exhausted, and much to her surprise, she fell asleep quickly and managed to stay that way for several hours.   </p><p>Around 3 am, she woke up from a dead sleep to a pain in her stomach.  She sat up, rubbing her tight belly.  She had been having Braxton hicks contractions for close to three months at this point, and this didn’t feel any different, so she got out of bed, using the bathroom before going to grab herself something to drink.  She was now wide awake so she sat down on the couch, watching some late night TV. </p><p> Every fifteen or so minutes, her stomach would tighten, and after about two hours, Carina started to time exactly how long these contractions were lasting.  She realized over the next two hours that they had gone from being 15 minutes apart to 13 to 11 and they were getting more intense.  She realized, much to her relief, that finally, finally, she was in labor. </p><p> However, with the contractions still pretty far apart and only lasting about 45 seconds, she knew she had time.  Maya had the car, which also conveniently had their hospital bag in it.  She decided to take a shower and then walk the five blocks to the station to meet Maya at the end of her shift which was in about an hour at this point. </p><p>Once she was clean, she filled her favorite water bottle, pulling on her only shoes that still fit along with her winter jacket before heading to the station.  She stopped once for a contraction, timing it carefully, before continuing on.  </p><p>She arrived at a quiet station, letting herself into Maya’s office.  She was grateful that Maya had decided she like having alternative seating options and always had an exercise ball in the corner of her office.  </p><p>Carina bounced on the ball, keeping track of her contractions which were now about 9 minutes apart and lasting close to a full minute.  She knew if Maya didn’t get back soon that she was going to have to walk to the hospital because she did not plan on giving birth in the fire station.  </p><p>However, about an hour after Carina got to the station, she heard the engines pulling back in.  Maya walked in 5 minutes later, startled to see her wife there.  </p><p>“Carina, what’s going on?” Maya asked, setting her paperwork down.  </p><p>“It’s time,” Carina said, smiling as she kept bouncing.  </p><p>“Time for what?” Maya asked, confused.  </p><p>“Time for Piccola and Patatina,” Carina said, another contraction hitting her right then.  </p><p>Maya ran to her, holding Carina’s hand as she breathed through the pain.  </p><p>“What are you doing here?” Maya asked, eyes wide with panic, “Shouldn’t you be at the hospital?  How long has this been going on?  We need to go!”  </p><p>“Maya,” Carina said, evening her breathing after the contraction, “Calm down.  The contractions started at 3 am.  They are still 8 minutes apart.  You need to go shower and then we can go.”  </p><p>“3 am,” Maya said, “Car, why didn’t you call me?  I would have come home.”  </p><p>“Because we have time,” Carina said, “Go shower and we can go.”   </p><p>“We can just go now,” Maya said, clearly starting to panic a little.  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, taking both of Maya’s hands in hers as she continued to bounce on the ball, “You stink, and there is no reason to rush to the hospital.  Go shower, get on some clothes, and we can go.  Your office is not a bad place to labor in.” </p><p> Just then, there was a knock on the door.  </p><p>“Hey Maya…,” Andy said, walking in and stopping when she saw Carina, “What’s going on?”  </p><p>“Carina’s in labor,” Maya said, looking at her friend, “And she doesn’t want to go to the hospital.” </p><p> “I did not say that,” Carina said, shaking her head, “I said I want you to go shower and then we can go.”  </p><p>“She’s right Maya,” Andy said, nodding, “Go get cleaned up.  Trust me, you are going to want to.  Robert came to the hospital straight from a call when I had Luca, and having to smell the smoke off him made me want to throw up the entire time I was in labor.  If it will make you feel better, I will stay here with Carina.” </p><p> “Fine,” Maya said, “I’ll be back in 5, 10 minutes tops.” </p><p> “I will be fine,” Carina said, smiling, “Go.  I will be right here when you get back.”  </p><p>Maya gave Carina a quick kiss before running up to the showers.  </p><p>“How are you feeling?” Andy asked, sitting down in one of Maya’s chairs, “How far apart are the contractions?” </p><p> “I am feeling alright for now,” Carina said, nodding, “The pain is not too bad.  My contractions are still about 9 minutes apart.”  </p><p>Just then, another contraction started, Andy going behind Carina as the doctor tried to breath.  The lieutenant knelt down, putting her hands on Carina’s back, applying pressure.  As the contraction eased, Andy stood up. </p><p> “That felt amazing,” Carina said, taking a sip from her water bottle, “You need to show Maya how to do that before we leave.”  </p><p>“Sounds good,” Andy said, nodding, “You are really a champion.  I was screaming so much the whole time until they gave me an epidural.”  </p><p>“I am trying to avoid that,” Carina said, bouncing again, “The epidural.  As long as the girls are in a good position, I want to deliver them without medication.”  </p><p>“You are planning on pushing two babies out without pain meds?” Andy said, jaw dropping, “Damn Carina, I knew you were a badass, but that is crazy.”  </p><p>“Well, I have natural pain relief I plan to use,” Carina said, shrugging, “You know I researched using masturbation for pain relief right?”  </p><p>“And now I am much less interested in your birth plan,” Andy said, laughing a little, “Can I get you anything?  Something to drink?  A snack? A cool cloth?”  </p><p>“I am good,” Carina said, moving from bouncing to standing, needing to walk around. </p><p> However, as she took a step, there was a gush of fluid. </p><p> “I think my waters just broke,” Carina said, looking down at her wet leggings and the growing puddle under her.  </p><p>“That’s ok,” Andy said, guiding Carina away from the wetness on the floor, “Do you have any extra clothes in Maya’s bunk?”  </p><p>“Maybe,” Carina said, nodding, “If I do, they would be in the top drawer on the left.” </p><p> Andy went into the bunk, coming up empty handed.  </p><p>“We have extra pairs of sweats upstairs,” Andy said, “They are stretchy and will at least get you to the hospital in something dry.”  </p><p>Just as Andy was about to go grab the fresh clothes for Carina, Maya walked in.  </p><p>“What’s going on?” she asked, “Why are you all wet?”  </p><p>“My waters broke,” Carina said, pointing to the puddle, “Sorry.”  </p><p>“We need to go to the hospital,” Maya insisted, starting at her wife.  </p><p>“I am gonna go grab her a change of pants,” Andy said, “You get packed up.”  </p><p>Maya frantically packed her bag as Andy ran upstairs. Andy reappeared less than a minute later with some pants, handing them to Carina.  Maya took her into her bunk, helping her change.  </p><p>As they walked out, there was another knock on the door. </p><p> “Hey, Cap, you coming to the New Year’s party to…what’s going on?” Vic asked, confused at the sight in front of her.  </p><p>“Carina’s in labor,” Maya said, “We aren’t gonna make the party tonight.”  </p><p>“Yeah, obviously,” Vic said, nodding as she went to Carina’s other side, helping her out of the office as Andy grabbed her best friend’s bag, following them.  </p><p>Just as they were about to go out to the car, another contraction started and Carina stopped, grabbing onto the front desk. </p><p> “Just breathe Babe,” Maya said, replacing Carina’s hand that was digging into her back with her own, gently massaging the area that seemed to be causing her the most discomfort.</p><p>  “They are getting closer together,” Carina said, slightly out of breath, “That was only 8 minutes since the last one.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, offering Carina her arm as Vic got on the other side and Andy grabbed Maya’s bag, “Let’s go.”  </p><p>Within fifteen minutes, they were at Grey Sloan and Carina was being taken to her floor, but this time, instead of being the doctor, she was going to be the laboring mom for the first time. </p><p> “Alright, Carina,” their OB, Danielle said, coming in, “Let me do a check and we will have a better idea of what’s going to happen.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, moving so Danielle could examine her. </p><p> “So you are about 4 centimeters,” Danielle said, pulling off her glove, “I want to grab a quick ultrasound to see how these two are doing.”  </p><p>At Carina’s last appointment, both girls were head down which was good.  </p><p>“It looks like the ladies have stayed in their perfect positions,” Danielle said, “So I am comfortable letting you proceed with a vagina birth as planned.  It will have to be in the OR, as you know, but unless they drastically change their positions, you are good to go.”  </p><p>“Grazie,” Carina said, nodding as Danielle left.  </p><p>“We are going to meet the girls today,” Maya said, smiling at Carina, “We are going to be moms.”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, body tensing as another contraction started.  </p><p>For the next eight hours, Carina labored relatively peacefully.  She and Maya walked around the labor and delivery floor, all the doctors and nurses excited for her.  </p><p>Carina progressed to 6 centimeters, but then, her labor stalled.  She tried everything to get it started again naturally, including convincing Maya to give her an orgasm, but nothing worked and after two hours and two rounds of sex, she still wasn’t progressing at all.  </p><p>Danielle finally stepped in and told Carina she needed meds to start labor again because the longer the babies were in with her waters broke, the higher the chance of infection. </p><p> Carina knew she was right and relented.  After a small amount of medication, and a few more hours, Carina was fully dilated at 11:30 pm. </p><p> “Alright, Carina,” Danielle said, “We are going to move you to the OR, and then it’s time for these little girls to be born.”</p><p> Carina nodded, holding Maya’s hand as her contractions came back to back, barely having a minute between them to recover. </p><p> “It hurts,” Carina said, breathing shaky as she panted.  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, dabbing Carina’s head with a wet cloth, “You’ve got this babe.”  </p><p>“I don’t know why I tell moms to masturbate to get through this,” Carina said, back arching, “That sounds awful right now.”  </p><p>Maya chuckled a little as she tried her best to make Carina comfortable. </p><p> By 11:45, they were in the OR and Carina was getting ready to push.  </p><p>“Just a few more minutes, and we get to meet these babies,” Maya said, nodding, “You’ve got this babe.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, getting ready to push.  After fifteen minutes of pushing, Carina was spent, having been laboring for close to 21 hours at this point. </p><p> “Get behind me,” Carina begged Maya, her entire body feeling like it was being ripped in half. </p><p> Maya quickly climbed into bed behind her wife, holding her body up.  </p><p>“Come on Babe,” Maya said, “You can do this.”  </p><p>“One more push and the first baby will be here,” Danielle said, “Come on Carina.  You can do it.”  </p><p>Carina screamed, pushing as hard as she could. </p><p> “She’s here,” Danielle said, making sure the baby was breathing before putting her on Carina’s chest, a nurse immediately wiping her off a little, “12:04 am.”</p><p> “She’s here,” Carina said, bursting into tears, “Oh, Maya, she is perfect.  Look at her.”  </p><p>“I see her babe,” Maya said, tears streaming down her own cheeks as she looked down at their beautiful daughter who was screaming on Carina’s chest.  </p><p>Just then, another contraction started, Carina feeling her entire body tense. </p><p> “Alright,” Danielle said, “Jen, can you take the baby?  Carina, it’s time to push again.” </p><p> Ten minutes later, Carina pushed their second daughter out.  </p><p>“Oh my goodness,” Carina said, looking at the baby.  </p><p>“She is so perfect,” Maya said, putting her hand on the baby’s back, “They both are.”  </p><p>“We have two babies,” Carina said, tears running down her cheeks. </p><p> “Look at the time,” Maya said, “They were both born after midnight.  They are our New Year’s babies.” </p><p>Carina smiled, leaning back and kissing her wife before both of them went back to staring at their newborn daughter. </p><p> Maya got out of the bed after the nurses took the second baby, Carina still have two placentas to deliver which were much easier than the two babies and insisted Maya go check on the babies.</p><p>“Here is your oldest,” one of the nurses said as Maya walked over to the warmers where the babies were, “She is a healthy 7 lbs.  8 oz.  20 inches long.”  </p><p>“She’s perfect,” Maya said, putting her finger into her daughter’s hand, tiny fingers closing around it immediately as the baby looked around. </p><p> “Hi,” Maya said, tears filling her eyes, “I’m Mommy.  I love you so much Piccola.” </p><p> Maya spent another minute with her before going to the next warmer.  Unlike her quiet sister, their younger daughter was screaming.  </p><p>“Her lungs are obviously healthy,” one of the nurses said, laughing a little, “She is 7 lbs. 2 oz. 19 inches long.”  </p><p>“They are so perfect,” Maya said, putting a hand on the squirmy baby, calming her a little, “Hi Patatina.  It’s ok.  I know this is a lot, but you are ok.” </p><p> Ten minutes later, the babies were back on Carina’s chest, the doctor exhausted but beyond happy as she was wheeled back to recovery with her girls.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>They're here! So Exciting! I already have their names picked out and will share them in the next chapter.  Also, this story is getting close to 10,000 hits which is insane! Thank you all so much for reading, commenting, and giving kudos.  It really will probably be a little while before I update again, but I hope this tides you over until I have time to write the next chapter.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Names</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So, I know I said it was going to be a while, but this chapter ended up being more done than I thought, and I had less work to do today than I anticipated, so here you go! Baby names coming up!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“They are truly perfect,” Maya said around 8 the next morning after they had gotten a few hours’ sleep while the twins were in the nursery, the nurses bringing them in once around 4 am so they could nurse before bringing them back at 7 am both so they could eat and so their moms could spend time with them.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, looking down at the little baby who was sleeping in her arms, “But they look so different.” </p><p> Maya nodded, looking between their two daughters as she and Carina both sat on the bed.  They had purposely picked an Italian donor who had similar features to Carina so the girls would look a little like both of them. </p><p> Baby A looked a lot more like Carina with a lot of dark hair and eyes that were a darker gray they both of them were convinced would turn brown as she grew.  Baby B had a small amount of blonde hair on her head and eyes that were so blue.  </p><p>“I can’t believe they are ours,” Maya said, planting a small kiss on her younger daughter’s forehead.  </p><p>“Are you guys up for visitors?” Amelia said, knocking on the door.  </p><p>“Of course,” Carina said, smiling as her best friend walked in.  </p><p>“Oh my goodness,” Amelia said, walking over to the bed, “They are precious.” </p><p> “Do you want to hold one of them?” Maya asked, breaking her eyes away from the sleeping baby in her arms to look at the neurosurgeon.  </p><p>“Yes please,” Amelia said, walking over to the sink, washing her hands quickly before taking the baby from Maya, “Oh my goodness, they are so small.  They make Harper seem huge.” </p><p> “They are not small,” Carina said, shaking her head, “They are each over 7 lbs., and I had to push out two of them.”  </p><p>“Ok, but Harper started rolling over and cut a tooth in the past week so these two are tiny,” Amelia said, cooing at the baby in her arms, “I can’t wait for you two to meet your future best friend.  She is pretty cute even though she doesn’t like to sleep through the night.  Do they have names yet?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding as the baby in her arms opened her eyes, making a face that made Carina laugh a little, “You are holding Rowan Andrea and this is Elenora Mason.”</p><p>  “Those are beautiful names,” Amelia said, not looking up from the sleeping newborn in her arms, “I like the nod to both of your brothers.”  </p><p>“And Carina’s mom,” Maya said, “Her name was also Elenora.”</p><p>  “That is so special,” Amelia said, looking at her friends, “And Rowan?” </p><p> “It’s the name of the street we stayed on during our honeymoon,” Carina said, shrugging a little.  </p><p>“Well, I like it,” Amelia said, her pager suddenly going off, “Duty calls.  I will be back later for more baby snuggles?” </p><p> “Of course,” Carina said, nodding as Maya took Rowan back from Amelia. </p><p> Because it was New Year’s Day, it was relatively quiet for the next two hours.  Carina took a little nap while Maya held the girls until it was time for them to be fed.  </p><p>Carina was determined to breast feed them, at least for a little while so she was trying to figure out tandem feeding.  However, Elenora, or Nora, as they had decided to call her, wasn’t great at latching and Maya ended up bottle feeding her.  Carina asked to see a lactation consultant later in the day to see if maybe she had some pointers, but as a doctor, she knew that as long as the babies were fed, they were fine.  </p><p>At 10, there was another knock on the door, just after they finished feeding the babies. </p><p> “Come in,” Carina called, pulling her gown back up as she burped Rowan. </p><p> “Is now an ok time?” Andrew asked, walking in with two stuffed animals. </p><p> “Si,” Carina said, smiling at her brother, “Come meet your nipoti, your nieces.” </p><p> “These are for them,” Andrew said, setting a penguin and a polar bear on Carina’s bed, “Oh wow, they are so cute.”  </p><p>“Wash your hands and you can hold them,” Carina said, gesturing to the sink.  </p><p>“Hi,” Andrew said, taking the baby from Carina, “Oh my goodness.  You are perfect.  I am your Zio Andrea.  I love you so much.” </p><p> Carina smiled as she watched her brother hold her daughter as Maya sat back down on the bed next to her.  </p><p>“Here,” the blonde said, handing Nora back to Carina, “Let me get some pictures.” </p><p> Maya went into their hospital bag, pulling out her camera.  </p><p>“Smile Zio Andrea,” Maya said, getting Andrew to look at her with a huge grin plastered on his face.  </p><p>“How are you feeling Carina?” Andrew asked, looking at his big sister.  </p><p>“Sore,” Carina said, “And exhausted, but so happy.” </p><p> “I can’t believe you had the first babies of the year,” Andrew said, shaking his head.  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, moving Nora up to her shoulder as the little girl fussed, “I honestly thought we would have them by Christmas, but they had their own plans.”  </p><p>“Just like their moms,” Andrew said, “Never doing what people expect.  What are their names?” </p><p> “You have Rowan Andrea,” Maya said as Carina adjusted Nora again, “And your sister has Elenora Mason.”  </p><p>“You named her after Mamma?”  Andrew said, tears filling his eyes, “And wait, did you say Rowan Andrea?” </p><p> “Si,” Carina said, Maya taking Nora as she continued to fuss, walking around the room with her a little, “After you.”  </p><p>“Wow,” Andrew said, “That’s… wow.  Thank you.” </p><p> “You are their Zio,” Carina said, smiling at her brother with tired eyes, “And my baby brother.”  </p><p>“I need to get back to work,” Andrew said, begrudgingly handing the baby back to Carina, “I will be back later.  Congratulations, both of you.”  </p><p>Andrew left as Nora continued fussing in Maya’s arms.  Finally, the blonde unwrapped the baby, noticing her diaper was wet.  </p><p>“I think I know why she’s so fussy,” Maya said, “Where are the diapers?” </p><p> “Under the bassinet,” Carina said, knowing where everything was kept because normally, she was being asked that by patients.  </p><p>As Maya laid Nora in the bassinet, there was another knock on the door and in walked Andy and Vic.  </p><p>“Hey guys,” Carina said, smiling as Vic placed a bouquet of flowers down. </p><p> “Congratulations,” Andy said, going over to Carina and giving her a small hug as Vic did the same.  </p><p>“Is Maya changing a diaper?” Vic said, looking over and seeing their new battalion chief with a package of wipes. </p><p> “I know how to change diapers,” Maya said, carefully wiping the baby up before getting a fresh diaper on her.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, “I taught her the first time we babysat Scout.”  </p><p>“Also, I have watched everyone’s kids, including yours, Andy,” Maya said, smiling at her friends.</p><p> Maya quickly got the new diaper on the red faced, screaming baby before rewrapping her blanket and scooping her up, bouncing her a little to settle her. </p><p>“There you go Nora,” Maya said, smiling as the baby settled against her chest, worn out from her diaper change. </p><p> “Nora?” Vic said, walking over to Maya, “That’s adorable.”  </p><p>“Her full name is Elenora Mason Deluca-Bishop,” Maya said, trying to hand the baby to Vic only to have her start screaming again, “Hang on.  Let me try to get her settled, and then I’ll give her to you.”  </p><p>“No,” Vic said, shaking her head, “She clearly wants her mom, and I am not going to be the one to deny her that, especially when she’s not even a day old.”  </p><p>Maya smiled as Nora nuzzled closer to her, eyes starting to close.  </p><p>“And who is this?” Andy asked as Carina handed her the other baby who was sound asleep and not nearly as needy as her sister at the moment.  </p><p>“Rowan Andrea Deluca-Bishop,” Carina said.  </p><p>“Hey,” Vic said, jokingly “How come she gets a baby named after her?” </p><p> “Because I am going to be her favorite Tia,” Andy said, laughing.  </p><p>“Actually,” Maya said, “Their middle names are after our brothers.” </p><p> “I figured,” Andy said, smiling at her best friend, “But I might just pretend it’s after me.  God, they are so cute.  They make me want another baby.” </p><p> “You should have one,” Carina said, nodding, “Then the twins can have someone to play with.” </p><p> “I’ve been trying to talk Robert into it for the past few months,” Andy admitted, “He says we just got Luca out of the baby stage with the potty training and big boy bed, but I told him that’s the exact reason we need another one.  Maybe Nora and Rowan will change his mind because they are so precious.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Vic said, rubbing her hands together, “My turn with the munkin.” </p><p> Maya smiled as she walked back over to the hospital bed, handing Nora back to Carina, the baby fussing for a second before cuddling up inside Carina’s hospital gown, her head directly on her mamma’s heart.  </p><p>“You doing alright, Babe?” Maya asked, leaning over and kissing her wife’s forehead. </p><p> “Si,” Carina said, nodding as she looked up at Maya, “I don’t think I have ever been so happy to be so tired.” </p><p> “You can rest if you need to,” Maya said. </p><p> “No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “I am alright for now.  I have slept more since they have been born than I think I did the last week of my pregnancy.”</p><p>  Maya nodded, knowing sleep had not been easy for Carina for the past few months, but the past week, Carina’s sleeping patterns made insomniac Maya look like she was a champion sleeper.  </p><p>“Did you have them naturally?” Andy asked. </p><p> “She did,” May answered, “Like the amazing champion she is.”</p><p>  “Well, it helped that the girls decided to both miraculously be head down,” Carina shrugged, “And they decided to make their birth extra special and be the first babies born in Seattle this year.” </p><p> “Wait, they weren’t born until after midnight?” Vic said, “But you went into labor…”</p><p> “At 3 am yesterday,” Carina nodded, gently rubbing Nora’s back as the baby squirmed a little, “Si.  It was a long labor.  These two are just as stubborn as their Mommy, only giving into change when they absolutely have to.”  </p><p>Maya shot her a look, but quickly followed it with a smiled. </p><p>“You must be exhausted,” Andy said, shaking her head.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, “But they are worth it.”  </p><p>“We ca go if you want to sleep,” Vic said, not taking her eyes off Rowan who had just woken up.  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “I am fine.”  </p><p>Rowan decided she was over being held by Vic apparently because she started crying just then.  </p><p>“I’ll take her,” Maya said, walking over to Vic and scooping the baby out of her friend’s arms. </p><p> “I remember when you used to run from any crying baby,” Andy said, shaking her head, “Or really any crying adult too.”  </p><p>Maya rolled her eyes at her friends before giving her full attention to her daughter.  Maya changed her diaper, but Rowan still wouldn’t settle.  Maya walked around the room, just gently bouncing the little girl.  The baby let out a loud burp before settling down. </p><p> “Oh, that was the problem,” Maya said, laughing a little as Rowan laid her head against Maya’s neck.  </p><p>Vic and Andy stayed for a while longer, Nora deciding she would let her Aunts hold her for a little while before both firefighters had to leave.  </p><p>“Congratulations again,” Vic said, smiling as they left.  </p><p>“And text us if you need anything,” Andy said, “I’ll bring by dinner once you guys are home.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Maya and Carina both said as their friends left. </p><p> The lactation consultant came in not long after their friends left and gave Carina some help getting the girls to latch.  It was a process, but eventually, she made it happen, and Carina burst into tears when it did.  Maya didn’t quite know what to do, but she put a hand on her wife’s back, pressing a kiss into her temple.  </p><p>“They’re really doing it,” Carina said, looking at Maya.  </p><p>“You’re doing it,” Maya said, “I’m so proud of you Babe.”  </p><p>The girls knocked out after eating and so did Carina.  Maya decided to run to the deli near the hospital to grab some food for both of them because the girls were in the nursery for a few tests.  </p><p>Maya came back, smiling when she saw Carina still asleep in bed.  She walked down to the nursery, finding the girls in their basinets.  </p><p>“Can I take them back to our room?” Maya asked one of the nurses.  </p><p>“Of course,” the nurse said, helping Maya bring the twins back to their room.  The blonde scooped up Rowan who was awake, looking around.  </p><p>“What are you looking at?” Maya asked, kissing Rowan’s little forehead. </p><p> The baby fussed a little, squirming in Maya’s arms.  The blonde pulled off her t-shirt before stripping the baby down to only a diaper and settling her on her chest inside her tank top, covering her with a blanket.  Rowan sighed, eyes closing almost immediately.  </p><p>“I promise, I will always hold you when you need me to,” Maya said, kissing the baby’s head that was covered in a hat, “And I will love you forever.  I will listen to you and let you make the choices you want and you are never going to the Olympics, unless that’s what you want.  Then, I will be there to cheer you on every step of the way.  Your mamma and I love you and your sister so much.”  </p><p>“Yes we do,” Carina said, startling Maya a little.  </p><p>“Hey, I didn’t know you were awake,” the blonde said, making sure the baby was in a good position before looking at her wife.  </p><p>“You are such a great mom to our girls,” Carina said, smiling, “I didn’t think it was possible for me to fall more in love with you, but watching you with them, no lo so, it makes me love you in a new way.”  </p><p>“I feel the same way,” Maya said, carefully getting up and walking over to the bed, sitting down next to her wife. </p><p> “Someone clearly likes cuddling with Mommy,” Carina said as she pulled the blanket down a little to see Rowan’s tiny, sleeping face, “She is smart.  That is the best place to sleep.” </p><p> Maya smiled, leaning over and kissing Carina gently.  Just then, Nora decided she needed to join the party and started squawking from the bassinet.  </p><p>“I’ve got her,” Carina said, stopping Maya from moving, “I need to be walking around anyway.” </p><p> The brunette slowly got out of bed, walking over to the bassinet and picking up their older daughter.  </p><p>“Buongiorno Piccola,” Carina said, “Avete dormito bene?”  </p><p>Maya smiled listening to her wife speak in her native language to their daughter.  The blonde had picked up bits and pieces of Italian in the past five years, but she was nowhere near fluent.  They had decided that they wanted the girls to at least be bilingual so they could talk to their Italian family members, although if Andy had her way, the twins would be speaking English, Italian, and Spanish before they turned two.</p><p>  Carina brought the baby over to the bed, settling her against her in the same way Maya had Rowan.  </p><p>“I didn’t know it was possible to love someone I just met this morning this much,” Carina said, kissing Nora’s cheek.  </p><p>The four of them just sat there together until there was another knock on the door.  This time, it was Mason and his now fiancé, Lyla.  </p><p>“Is now an ok time?” Mason asked, not wanting to intrude.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, after looking at Carina for conformation, “Come meet your nieces.”  </p><p>Maya carefully moved Rowan off her chest, wrapping the baby in a blanket while Carina did the same with Nora.  Mason and Lyla quickly washed their hands before walking back over to the bed.    </p><p>“Here you go,” Carina said, handing the baby to her brother-in-law as Maya gave Lyla the other one. </p><p> “Wow,” Mason said, looking down at the tiny baby, “She is beautiful.”  </p><p>“What are their names?” Lyla asked, staring at the baby in her arms.  </p><p>“You have Rowan Andrea,” Maya said, “And Mason has Elenora Mason, or Nora.”  </p><p>“You named her after me?” Mason said, looking at his big sister, “Why?” </p><p> “Because you are my little brother,” Maya said, pulling her t-shirt back on, “And you are important to me.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Mason said, staring back down at the baby who held his namesake.  </p><p>“They are precious,” Lyla said, smiling as Rowan yawned, sticking out her tongue a little.  </p><p>“I hear congratulations are in order for you both,” Carina said, having not seen either of them since the engagement.  </p><p>“Oh, yeah,” Mason said, “Thanks.”  </p><p>The four of them chatted for a while until the babies got hungry.  </p><p>“We will leave you to feed them,” Lyla said, handing Nora, who she had ended up with after she and Mason switched babies, back to Carina.  </p><p>“Thank you for stopping by,” Maya said as she took Rowan.  </p><p>“Congratulations to you both,” Mason said, giving his sister a small hug which still felt incredibly weird to both of them.  </p><p>“You as well,” Carina said, smiling as they left.  </p><p>The rest of the afternoon and even were pretty much spent feeding and holding the twins.  People kept dropping by to see them because they all knew Carina and wanted to see how she was doing.  </p><p>Around nine, the babies were taken to the nursery so their moms could get a little rest.  </p><p>“I am going to run home for a little bit,” Maya said, kissing Carina’s cheek gently, “I want to get in a quick run because my body needs it, unless you want or need me to stay?” </p><p> “No,” Carina said, shaking her head sleepily, “Go take care of yourself.  I will be fine here.” </p><p> “I will try to be back before the girls’ next feed,” Maya said, giving her wife a kiss, “I love you.”  </p><p>“I love you too,” Carina said, her eyes already starting to close.  </p><p>Maya went home, running on the treadmill for about five miles before taking a quick shower.  She then went into the kitchen, smiling when she saw that Andy had dropped off what she had asked for.  Maya got to work making lasagna, knowing it was something Carina had been missing during her pregnancy, but because of her heartburn, it had been off the table for the past four months.  Maya planned to have it ready for when Carina was released from the hospital, which would hopefully be the following day according to her doctor. </p><p> By the time she had the dish done and in the fridge and the kitchen back in order, it was almost 11:30.  She knew the girls would need to be fed again around 12 so she headed out.  </p><p>She got back to the hospital, carefully and quietly going into Carina’s room, smiling when she saw that her wife was still sound asleep.  Maya sat down on the bench that doubled as her bed, knowing she wasn’t going to go to sleep until after the babies had been fed.  </p><p>Sure enough, twenty minutes later, a nurse came in with the babies, Maya gently waking Carina up.  Once the girls were fed, burped, and back in the nursery, Carina fell back to sleep, and Maya tried to get some rest as well. </p><p> The girls had another feed at 3 am and after their 6 am feed, Maya asked if they could just stay in the room.  Carina and Nora were both sleeping, but Maya was wide awake, and apparently, so was Rowan.  </p><p>“Are you going to be like me?” Maya asked as she sat doing skin to skin with the little baby, “Not sleeping like a normal person?  I hope not, for your sake, and for ours.  Although, it might not be the worst thing in the world to have another morning person in the house because your mamma would sleep all day if I let her.” </p><p>Rowan just nuzzled closer to Maya, letting out a little sigh.  </p><p>About ten minutes later, Nora started waking up.  Maya got up, carefully maneuvering the babies so she ended up with both of them on her chest.  She just stared at them, smiling when Nora grabbed Rowan’s hand, the two of them just snuggling with each other and her.  </p><p>When Carina stirred an hour later, she smiled as she looked over, seeing her wife with both their daughters.  </p><p>“Good morning Babe,” Maya said, looking up and seeing her wife was awake, “How are you feeling this morning?”  </p><p>“Better,” Carina said, stretching a little, “Still sore, but less tired.  I’m ready to take these little bambinas home.”  </p><p>“Me too,” Maya said, nodding as she got up, going over to the bed and letting Carina take Rowan.  </p><p>They stayed there for a little while until the pediatrician came in, giving the girls a quick exam before declaring them both healthy and signing their discharge papers.  After the pediatrician left, the new moms held their babies who were both rather disgruntled from being poked and prodded by the doctor.   About a half an hour later, there was a knock at the door and a nurse came in.  </p><p>“It’s time for the babies to have a bath,” the nurse said, bringing in a cart with supplies.</p><p>  “Alright,” Maya said, not quite sure what to do.  </p><p>“You can help, Bella,” Carina said, looking at her wife, “And then we can put some clothes on them.”  </p><p>“Ok,” Maya said, getting up and moving Nora, who had just woken up, out from where she had been cuddled in Maya’s tank top, the little girl squealing a little.  </p><p>“I know Piccola,” Maya said, keeping the blanket on the baby, “You are going to have a bath.  I don’t really like them, but your mamma is a big fan.” </p><p> “You don’t ever complain when I suggest we take a bath,” Carina said, looking at her wife.  </p><p>“Well, yeah, I like them with you.  I like everything with you,” Maya said, “But I would never take one alone.” </p><p> Carina rolled her eyes as Maya brought the baby over to the sink.  </p><p>“Now, we can’t give her a real bath until the umbilical stump falls off,” the nurse said, “But we can wash her hair and the rest of her body.”  </p><p>Maya helped wipe down the baby, who seemed to enjoy the warm water and towels that were draped over her.  Maya washed her hair which had been stuck to her head since she was born from all the goop.  Maya smiled as the hair came unstuck from the baby’s head, showing how much she really did have.  </p><p>Once the baby was cleaned up, the nurse wrapped her up in a blanket, handing her to Maya.  Maya carried her over to the bed, handing her to Carina while she grabbed a diaper and the going home outfit they had picked out for the girls.  </p><p>They both had little white onesies, one that said “Ciao World” and the other said “Hello Mondo” which Maya found to be incredibly cheesy, but Andy had gotten them made special for the girls and Carina loved them so when Carina suggested them for coming home outfits, Maya obliged.  They also each had a little pair of stretch pants, one a mauve and the other a mustard color along with matching hats. </p><p> “Put her in the mustard ones,” Carina said as Maya brought both outfits over to the bed.  </p><p>“Dr. Deluca, would you like to bathe your other daughter?” the nurse asked.  </p><p>“Only if you call me Carina,” the doctor said, getting up and carrying Rowan over to the sink. </p><p> Maya got Nora dressed quickly before setting the baby in the bassinet and grabbing the camera, snapping a few pictures of Carina bathing Rowan.  Unlike her sister, Rowan was pissed about having to take a bath, screaming the entire time.  </p><p>“Come here Patatina,” Carina said, taking the baby from her nurse, “I know.  That was rough.  Let’s get you dressed.”  </p><p>Carina sat down, Maya handing her a diaper which she quickly put on the screaming baby before pulling on her onesie and pants.  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, scooping the now red-faced infant up, “It’s ok.  The bath is done.”  </p><p>Rowan continued whimpering for a little longer before settling in Carina’s arms.  Both girls were asleep so Carina decided to get a shower herself.  </p><p>“Do you want my help?” Maya asked as Carina got up, clearly still aching from giving birth.</p><p>  “Maybe,” Carina said, “But the girls…”  </p><p>Just then, there was another knock on the door and Teddy stuck her head in. </p><p> “Are you guys up for visitors?”  the cardio surgeon asked. </p><p> “Perfect timing,” Maya said, “Come on in.  Meet the babies, Elenora Mason and Rowan Andrea.  Carina was just about to take a shower and now I can help her.”  </p><p>“Oh,” Teddy said, laughing as Maya handed her one of the twins, “Alright.”  </p><p>“Grazie Teddy,” Carina said, shaking her head a little.  </p><p>In all honesty, she was glad to have Maya’s help.  Her body was so sore that help sounded nice.  Once Carina had showered and put on some real clothes, they went back into the room, finding Teddy sitting in the chair, holding Rowan.  </p><p>“They are precious,” Teddy said, smiling at her friends.  </p><p>“Thanks,” Carina said, sitting back down on the bed.  </p><p>Just then, Danielle came in.  </p><p>“Hello Carina, Maya, Dr. Altman,” she said, smiling at all of them, “I just came to do a quick check on Carina, and if everything looks good, I am going to let you go home before lunch.”  </p><p>“Really?” Carina said, face lighting up. </p><p> “Of course,” Danielle said before beginning her questions.  </p><p>She knew most of this was just a formality, that Carina was very well versed on what was typical or not after child birth. </p><p> “Alright,” Danielle said, “I am going to send a nurse in her with your discharge papers.  I will see you in six weeks for your next appointment?”  </p><p>Carina nodded, smiling at Maya.  </p><p>Teddy got paged just as Danielle left, leaving the two new moms alone with their daughters with a few words of congratulations.   </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, “Well, the girls were cleared by the pediatrician so I guess this means we are busting out of here.”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding.  </p><p>“I’ll go grab the car seats,” Maya said, grabbing the car keys.  </p><p>Within an hour, the twins were loaded in their car seats and the new family was heading home for the first time.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What do you think?  I actually have noting else written for this.  I plan to do more, but I don't know when I will have time to.  The next two weeks are crazy both for work and school, but who knows because this is my favorite distraction from doing what I am supposed to so stay tuned.  And if you have any adventures you would like to see for this little family, let me know!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Welcome Home Anxiety</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“This is our house,” Carina said as Maya carried the girls car seats into the house.  </p><p>“Nora’s sound asleep,” Maya said, laughing, “And I’m sure Rowan has no idea what you are saying.” </p><p> “You are probably right,” Carina said, smiling a little, “Come on.  Let’s get them out.”  </p><p>Maya set the car seats down on the ground, unstrapping Rowan, handing her to Carina before getting Nora out too.  They took the babies upstairs to the master bedroom where they had two little bassinets set up for them to sleep in for the first few weeks or months, depending on when they started sleeping through the night.  </p><p>Carina sat down on the bed, laying Rowan down in the middle of the bed.  Maya set Nora down next to her sister before changing into some more comfortable clothes.  She then went and grabbed some swaddles from the nursery before rejoining the family in the master bedroom.</p><p>  Rowan was just looking around the room, little eyes blinking as she yawned.  </p><p>“God, they are so cute,” Maya said, staring down at the babies. </p><p> “Si,” Carina said, leaning her head on Maya’s shoulder, “I can’t believe they are ours.”  </p><p>Maya smiled, turning her head and kissing the top of her wife’s.  </p><p>“How are you feeling babe?” Maya asked, rubbing her back. </p><p> “Sore,” Carina said, “And tired. Can we just do nothing all day?”  </p><p>“You mean, besides take care of our babies?” Maya chuckled.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, “Speaking of which, they need to eat soon.”  </p><p>“Should we wake Nora?” Maya asked, knowing that her friends always yelled if she threatened to wake their kids.  </p><p>“Probably,” Carina said, “They need to be on the same schedule if we ever want to get any sleep.”  </p><p>“Good point,” Maya said, nodding as Carina got ready to feed the girls while Maya woke Nora.  </p><p>The baby made a face when Maya tried to wake her, letting out a soft whimper. </p><p> “Just like your mamma,” Maya said, shaking her head as she continued to try to rouse the sleeping infant. </p><p> The baby opened her eyes, looking pissed at the world as Maya handed her to Carina.  Once Nora realized there was food involved in this little wake up call, she seemed a little less perturbed.  Rowan had already latched and was getting her fill of milk.  </p><p>“How does it feel?” Maya asked, watching Carina adjust the babies a little.  </p><p>“Weird,” Carina admitted, “It kinda hurts a little still, but not so much.  It’s strange.” </p><p> “I’m sure,” Maya said, nodding, “Do you want me to get you anything?  Something to eat or drink?” </p><p> “Some tea?” Carina requested. </p><p> “Of course,” Maya said, nodding as she got out of bed. </p><p> She came back ten minutes later with a mug of tea and some of Carina’s favorite cookies.  </p><p>“Grazie,” the Italian said as her wife set the items down on the nightstand.   </p><p>Once the babies finished eating, each of them took one, burping them before laying them down on the bed between them, just watching them.  They were both awake, just blinking their little eyes, arms and legs moving in an uncoordinated, newborn way. </p><p> “I am much happier they are doing this in the bed instead of in my belly,” Carina said, reaching out and putting her finger in Rowan’s hand, the tiny fingers instantly curling around her larger one.  </p><p>“I’m sure,” Maya said, laughing as Nora yawned, “God, I still cannot believe we have two daughters.”  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, running a finger over Rowan’s soft cheek, “And they are so perfect.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, pulling off Nora’s hat, touching the baby’s soft hair.  The two of them just sat there for close to an hour, staring at the babies as they slowly fell asleep and then watching their funny facial expressions as they slept. </p><p> After an hour, Maya’s phone went off.  </p><p>“Andy wants to know if she and Robert can stop by and drop off a meal for us around 3?” Maya asked, glancing at her phone and seeing that it was about 1. </p><p> “Sure,” Carina said, nodding, “Only if I don’t have to get dressed.” </p><p> “Absolutely not,” Maya said, shaking her head, “You can wear whatever you want.” </p><p> “Then they can come,” Carina said, “Andy always brings good food.”  </p><p>“True,” Maya said, nodding as she texted her best friend back.  </p><p>Carina ended up nodding off for a little while, Maya grabbing her camera again and taking a photo of the three of them asleep on the bed.  Maya was never one for pictures, but she was desperate to remember all these little moments with the girls.  Carina woke up after about forty minutes, looking sleepily at her wife.  </p><p>“I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” the brunette said, rubbing her eyes.  </p><p>“You need it,” Maya said, giving her a small kiss, “I was just about to change the girls before Andy and Robert get here.” </p><p> “Do you want help?” Carina asked, stretching a little, her entire abdomen aching.  </p><p>“I’ve got it,” Maya said, “You just relax.  Do you want some Advil?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, all the meds she had gotten in the hospital having worn off. </p><p> Maya went into the bathroom, getting her wife the pills before going back into the bedroom, picking up Nora and bringing her to the changing station they had set up on their dresser.  </p><p>“When does baby poop start to look normal?” Maya asked, wrinkling her nose as she wiped Nora’s little bottom while the baby screamed. </p><p> “Well, the newborn poo normally ends in a few days, but until they start eating solids, it won’t be what you would call normal,” Carina said, shrugging as she picked up Rowan who had just woken up.  </p><p>Maya shook her head, getting a new diaper on the baby before redressing her.  </p><p> “I’ll trade you,” Maya said, handing Nora to Carina as she took Rowan.  </p><p>“I know Piccola,” Carina said, “Mommy is so mean, making sure you have a clean diaper before we have guests.” </p><p> “Alright Patatina,” Maya said, laying down the baby, “Let’s do this before Tia Andy gets here.”</p><p>  Carina smiled as she watched her wife take care of their daughter, grabbing Maya’s camera and snapping a picture. </p><p> “Alright,” Maya said, Rowan much less pissed about having her diaper changed than her sister, “Should we go downstairs?”  </p><p>Carina nodded, getting up slowly.</p><p>  “I need to use the bathroom before I do,” Carina said, walking slowly to the bathroom, “I will meet you downstairs?” </p><p> “We can wait for you,” Maya said, seeing how much pain her wife was in just by how she was walking. </p><p> “I am fine,” Carina said, “I gave birth, I didn’t have my leg amputated.  Take them downstairs.  I will join you in a few minutes.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, heading downstairs with a baby in each arm.  She put both of them in the bouncy seats Maya’s mom had gotten for them, neither baby happy they had been set down.  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, strapping them in, “I just need to go get some water from the kitchen.”</p><p>  By the time she got back with a pitcher of water and some glasses, both babies were screaming their head off. </p><p> “What’s wrong?” Carina asked, slowly coming down the stairs.  </p><p>“I had the audacity to set them down to get water,” Maya said, picking up the babies. </p><p> “Here,” Carina said, finally making it downstairs, “Let me have one of them.”  </p><p>Maya handed her Nora, the little girl settling quickly once she had been picked up.  Her sister, however, was less easily soothed.  Carina sat down on the couch while Maya paced the room, trying to calm her daughter.  </p><p>Finally, the baby settled, resting her head on Maya’s shoulder just as there was a knock on the door.  </p><p>“Hey,” Maya said, answering it and seeing Robert and Andy standing there, “Come on in. Where’s Luca?”  </p><p>“He’s with my cousin and her girlfriend today.  We didn’t want to overwhelm you guys with a crazy toddler today,” Andy said, coming in, Robert close behind her, “We brought enchiladas, some chicken soup, and apple streusel, Robert’s Oma’s recipe.” </p><p>“Thank you so much,” Maya said, going to take the pan from Andy.  </p><p>“We can do put it in the fridge,” Andy said, “You’ve got your hands full.” </p><p> Maya nodded, leading them into the kitchen, both Robert and Andy washing their hands before they all went into the living room.  </p><p>“Carina,” Andy said, coming around the couch, “Hey, how are you feeling?” </p><p> “I am alright,” Carina said, smiling as Andy sat down on the couch, “Just normal postpartum pain.”  </p><p>Andy nodded, knowing what her friend was talking about. </p><p> “Congratulations to both of you,” Robert said, sitting down next to his wife.  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya said, smiling at him, “Would you like to hold one of them?”  </p><p>“I… Sure,” Robert said, holding out his hands.  </p><p>Maya handed him Rowan, the baby fussing a little before settling into his arms.  </p><p>“Wow,” he said, smiling as he looked at the baby while Carina handed Nora to Andy, “I forgot how tiny they are.” </p><p> “Well, your son who was two weeks late and over 10 lbs.,” Andy said, shaking her head, “So he was never actually this small.” </p><p> Robert shrugged, clearly mesmerized by the baby.  </p><p>“Kinda makes you want another one, doesn’t it?” Andy said, staring down at Nora who was looking around.  </p><p>“You just got the promotion you have been gunning for since I met you,” Robert said, “You really want to give it up?”  </p><p>“I wouldn’t have to give it up,” Andy said, shaking her head.  </p><p>“We can talk about this later,” Robert said, clearly not wanting to have this conversation again, “So, Andy tells me they were the first babies born this year in Seattle.”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding, “Their pictures will probably be in the paper tomorrow or the next day.” </p><p> “That is crazy,” Robert said, shaking his head.  </p><p>“Oh my goodness,” Andy said, looking at the babies’ outfits, “They’re wearing the onesies I got them.”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, “We brought them home in them.”  </p><p>“Really?” Andy said, looking at her friends.  </p><p>“Carina insisted,” Maya said, nodding.  </p><p>Andy smiled, looking down at the baby in her arms.  </p><p>The four of them chatted for a while before the babies got hungry, Rowan making it very well known that she was not in the mood to wait for her food.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, bouncing the baby a little as Andy and Robert got ready to leave, “You will get some food soon.  Bye guys.  Thanks for stopping by.”  </p><p>“And thank you for the food,” Carina said, standing up to see them out. </p><p> “Congratulations again,” Robert and Andy called, leaving.  </p><p>Once they left, Carina got herself situated, Maya bringing her the nursing pillow from upstairs as she got the babies latched.  Both girls ate, Carina sighing.  </p><p>“You alright?” Maya asked, putting a hand on Carina’s back.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, “Just feeling a bit overwhelmed.” </p><p> “About what?” Maya asked, concerned. </p><p> “Being a mamma,” Carina said, adjusting Nora a little, “Having two babies.  I don’t know.  It is all just postpartum hormone changes I’m sure.  It is just a lot.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, kissing Carina’s cheek before seeing the tears in her eyes, “Hey, don’t cry.  We are going to figure this out together.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, wiping the tears off her face, “I know.  I don’t even know why I’m crying.”  </p><p>“You have been through a lot in the past two days,” Maya said, kissing her wife’s cheek, “You gave birth to two babies and became a mother.  That is reason enough.”  </p><p>“How did I get so lucky to have you as my wife?” Carina asked, smiling at her before kissing her. </p><p> The rest of the night was fairly quiet.  Maya surprised Carina with the lasagna she had made the day before, the Italian bursting into tears yet again when her wife gave her the plate of her favorite food that she hadn’t been able to eat for the past four months.  </p><p>That night, they brought the twins upstairs, taking them into their nursery for the first time.  </p><p>“This is where your nonnina used to take me and Zio Andrea when we were bambinos,” Carina said, showing Nora the painting Mason had done, “You won’t ever get to meet your nonnina, but she would have loved you so much.”  </p><p>Maya smiled, walking up behind her wife with a freshly changed and dressed Rowan. </p><p> “She would be so proud of you,” Maya said, wrapping an arm around her wife while juggling her newborn daughter in her other arm.  </p><p>“You never even met her,” Carina said, shaking her head, “How do you know she would be proud?”  </p><p>“Because you are an incredible woman,” Maya said, “And everything you have done is amazing from your work to our daughters and any good mom would be incredibly proud.”  </p><p>Carina looked at Maya with tears in her eyes.</p><p> “Ti amo tanto,” the emotional woman said, “Baciami.”  </p><p> </p><p>Over the next month, all the happy feelings of having two newborns started to wear off and Carina was struggling.  She had barely been sleeping at all since they were born, too worried about what might happen to them.</p><p> At first, it was manageable, but the older the babies got, the more she worried.  She would lay awake at night, thinking about all the terrible things that could happen.  She checked on them, compulsively, every thirty minutes, just making sure they were still breathing, despite the fact that they both slept with smart socks that would alert Maya and Carina if anything was abnormal with the babies. </p><p> Maya had been back at work for two weeks, leaving Carina home with the babies by herself a lot of the time during the day.  When she was alone with them, she never slept.  When they napped, she would just sit by their bassinets, staring at them.  </p><p>At night, she was up checking on them constantly.  Maya had noticed that Carina seemed a little off, having been snapped at more than once for how she was burping the twins or how she dressed them, but she also knew that Carina was more experienced with babies and extremely hormonal because she had just given birth, so she tried not to start a fight.  </p><p>She also knew she was getting up in the middle of the night to check on the girls but didn’t realize that she wasn’t waking up every time Carina got up.  Maya tried her best to support her wife, trying to give her time to nap when she was home and helping with as much as she could with the girls.  </p><p>However, things were starting to get out of hand.  For instance, Maya had always helped give the girls a bath since their first bath, but recently, Carina had started doing it exclusively when Maya was at work, claiming it worked better for their schedule.  Maya was disappointed because she loved giving them baths but didn’t think much of it until she had a three day stretch of not working. </p><p> “Hey, Car,” Maya said, having just wiped spit up off Rowan for the 4th time, “I think the girls could use a bath.  I’ll go give Rowan one while you finish up feeding Nora.”  </p><p>Rowan had proven herself to be a much more efficient eater than she older sister and always finished a few minutes earlier. </p><p>“No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “No, I want to give them a bath.”  </p><p>“But you always do it,” Maya said, confused, “Let me this time.  I miss giving them baths.” </p><p> “No,” Carina said, “I will do it.” </p><p> “Come on,” Maya said, starting to get a little frustrated, “I’ll do Ro and you can do Nora.”  </p><p>“Maya, I said I would do it,” Carina snapped angrily, “You haven’t given them a bath in a long time and you might have forgotten how.”  </p><p> </p><p>“Carina, I know how to bathe our daughters,” Maya said angrily, “It’s only been like 2 weeks.”  </p><p>“No,” Carina almost yelled, startling Nora who started to cry, “Now look what you did.  You made Nora cry.  I will give them a bath.”  </p><p>Maya was incredible hurt, picking up Rowan and taking her to the nursery, needing space from her wife.  She was confused.  She knew how to take care of the babies.  She had spent a lot of Carina’s pregnancy learning how to do things with a newborn, even spending a few afternoons with Amelia and Harper when the neurosurgeon was on maternity leave so she could be around a baby that small and get some practice taking care of her.  </p><p>Carina knew this and had told Maya how proud she was of her, but now, it was like she didn’t trust Maya.  The blonde took some space, just holding Rowan who fell asleep in her arms quickly.  She didn’t want to fight with Carina and she knew she would if she stayed with her.  </p><p>About ten minutes later, she carried Rowan back to the bedroom, finding Carina still sitting on the bed with little Nora.  </p><p>“Car,” Maya said softly, “Is everything ok?” </p><p> “Si,” Carina said, nodding, “I am fine.  Sorry I yelled.  I just have a routine with them and I don’t want to mess it up.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya nodded, sitting down next to her wife, “But Babe, I can be a part of it too.”</p><p>  “You can help me give them a bath,” Carina said, nodding.  </p><p>Turns out, helping looked a lot like standing by and watching Carina do it, but Maya just wrote this incident off to exhaustion.  However, over the next two weeks, things like that became more and more prevalent until Maya felt like she couldn’t even pick up the babies without Carina criticizing her.  </p><p>It all came to a head when Maya had picked Nora up from her bassinet, holding her out in front of her as she smiled at the baby.  </p><p>“Don’t hold her like that,” Carina snapped at her wife, “You could drop her.”  </p><p>“I’ve got her,” Maya said, looking at the brunette, “She’s fine.  I hold her like this all the time.”  </p><p>“Well, then maybe you shouldn’t hold her at all,” Carina said, getting up and walking over to Maya, taking the baby from her arms.  </p><p>“Carina, what the hell?” Maya said, floored at what her wife had just done, “I can hold my own daughter.”  </p><p>Just then, Rowan started crying and before Maya could get her, Carina picked her up to.  </p><p>“Just go Maya,” Carina said, “You clearly don’t care about keeping our daughters safe so just go.”  </p><p>Tears pricked Maya’s eye, but she walked out, sensing something else was going on with her wife.  She grabbed her phone, trying to call Andy, but getting her voicemail, so instead, she tried Amelia.  </p><p>She knew she really needed to talk to. Carina, but right now, she was too frustrated and worried to be able to do that efficiently so she wanted to find out from someone else who had had a baby if this was normal or not and what she could do to help.  </p><p>“Hey Maya,” the doctor said, answering, “What’s up?”</p><p>  “I think something’s wrong with Carina,” Maya said, having stepped out onto their porch to have this conversation.  </p><p>“Why?” Amelia asked, worried. </p><p> “She won’t even let me hold the babies anymore,” Maya said, “It’s like she doesn’t trust me or something.  And the other day, when Vic came over to see them, she wouldn’t let her hold them either, claiming they were too tired and when I tried to change her mind, she snapped at me.  I don’t think she’s really sleeping and I just don’t know what to do.”  </p><p>“I think I know what this is,” Amelia said, sighing, “When is her 6 week postpartum appointment?”  </p><p>“Tomorrow I think,” Maya said, rubbing her hand over her face.</p><p>  “Ok,” Amelia said, “Good.  It sound to me like she had postpartum anxiety.  One of my friends had it really bad after she had her second baby and it got to a point that she didn’t put the baby down for like a week I think because she was worried that he would stop breathing.”  </p><p>“Well, what am I supposed to do to help her?” Maya asked.  </p><p>“She’s probably going to need some professional help,” Amelia said, “You should talk to her about it tonight if the appointment is tomorrow, and then talk to her doctor tomorrow.  Is she still on her anxiety meds?” </p><p> “Yeah,” Maya said, “But she had to change them when she got pregnant.”</p><p>  “They might need adjusting,” Amelia said, “I don’t know because I’m not her doctor, but talk to her and her doctor about it.  She’ll be ok, but she’s going to need support.” </p><p> “Thanks Amelia,” Maya said, feeling tears in her eyes, “Thanks for your help.”  </p><p>“Of course,” Amelia said, “I’m here for both of you.  Just let me know if you guys need anything.”  </p><p>Maya sighed, hanging up the phone.  She took a few deep breaths.  She knew Carina had anxiety and had seen her have pretty bad episodes with it, but Carina had been diagnosed at 15 and diligently worked on managing it since with medication and therapy so by the time she met Maya, she had at least somewhat of a handle on it. </p><p> Carina and Maya were both in therapy, varying how often their appointments were from between once a week and once a month depending on how they were feeling. However, since the twins were born, neither of them had been to therapy because there just wasn’t time.  </p><p> This, however, was so much more than Carina’s normal anxiety.  Maya was worried, but she pushed that aside, going back into the house, brewing a pot of Carina’s favorite tea before going upstairs, knocking gently on their bedroom door before going in.  She found Carina sitting on the bed, tears running down her cheeks, one baby in each arm.  </p><p>“Oh babe,” Maya said, setting down the tea before going to her wife, “Hey, what’s wrong?” </p><p> “I don’t know,” Carina said, tears streaming down her face as Maya put a hand on her back, “Everything just feels so overwhelming and hard and what if something happens to them?  And I’m so tired, but I can’t sleep because what if they stop breathing or something. I’m sorry I snapped at you.  I’m just so tired.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, pulling Carina as close as she could with where the babies were, “I know.  Babe, I think there’s more going on here than just some exhaustion.  This is like when you have bad anxiety attacks but worse.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, knowing her wife was right, “Lo so.  I just don’t know what to do.”   </p><p>“I will help you,” Maya said, pressing a kiss into Carina’s temple, “Tomorrow, at your appointment, we can talk to Danielle and see what she can do and then, we are going to find time for you to go back to see your therapist, and I can work from here if you need me to some of the time.  It’s going to get better, Babe.  I promise.” </p><p> Carina nodded, letting out another sob. </p><p> “Can I take the girls?” Maya asked, “I promise I will stay right here.” </p><p> Carina nodded slowly, Maya taking Nora out of Carina’s arms. </p><p> “Alright,” Maya said, getting the baby settled before wrapping her other arm around her wife, “Now, what do you need from me right now?”  </p><p>“Just… don’t leave,” Carina said, voice shaky. </p><p> “I won’t,” Maya said, “Promise. I’m not going anywhere.”  </p><p>The rest of that night was rough.  Maya decided not to go to sleep until Carina did which meant neither of them slept because Carina didn’t sleep.  </p><p>“How long has it been since you slept?” Maya asked as they laid in bed, the girls in their bassinets having just been fed.  </p><p>“I don’t know,” Carina admitted, “A long time.”  </p><p>“I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you,” Maya said, heart hurting for her wife as she mentally kicked herself for not keeping a better eye on Carina’s mental health. </p><p> “I didn’t really let you,” Carina said, shrugging as she moved, going to check the babies. </p><p> Maya knew Carina had been up a lot to check on the girls, but tonight she saw just how often she did it.  Carina could physically not stay in bed for longer than fifteen minutes without checking on the babies.  </p><p>“They are alright,” Maya reassured as Carina studied the babies for what was the twenty fourth time that night, the blonde having been keeping track. </p><p> “Logically, I know that,” Carina sighed, putting her hand on Rowan’s chest, feeling the movement, “I just… I don’t know. I know it’s not normal.”  </p><p>“It’s ok, babe,” Maya said, opening her arms for her wife, “We are going to get you help.  This is going to get better.” </p><p> The two of them stayed up all night, Carina checking on the girls a total of 37 times during the night, Maya realizing just how bad this was and kicking herself for not seeing it earlier.  </p><p>They got up after the girls’ 8 am feeding, Maya going and getting some cute outfits for the girls who were going with them to the doctors today.  Maya knew it was going to probably be a long day both because they needed to figure out what to do to help Carina and because everyone at the hospital loved seeing the girls. </p><p> Once they were dressed, Carina got dressed, realizing she hadn’t changed her clothes in almost four days.  Maya also got dressed before making breakfast, pouring both of them a large cup of coffee because she knew they both needed it.  </p><p>By 10, they were all loaded up in the car after Maya helped Carina through a panic attack while they were loading the babies.  The Italian woman insisted on sitting in the back, just in case something happened, and Maya was not about to argue with her.  </p><p>They got to the hospital quickly, each of them putting a baby in a carrier before walking into the hospital.  </p><p>“Oh my goodness,” Amelia said, walking up to them, having been at the main desk talking to a nurse about a transfer she was expecting, “Babies!”  </p><p>Maya smiled, moving a little so Amelia could get a better look at Nora who was snoozing on her chest.  Amelia went to touch the baby’s fuzzy head but stopped short, remembering her conversation with Maya the day before, looking at Carina.  The look on her friends face told her everything, and she backed off.  </p><p>“Do you have your postpartum appointment today?” the neurosurgeon asked.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, Maya taking her hand, rubbing soothing circles on it, “We need to get going.”</p><p>  “Good luck,” Amelia said, exchanging a look with Maya as they turned away, the blonde just nodding.  </p><p>They made their way upstairs, getting taken back pretty quickly.  Carina was clearly nervous and Maya stood next to her, rubbing her back and just being there for her.  </p><p>“Babe, it’s going to be ok,” Maya said, pressing a kiss into Carina’s hairline as she rubbed her back, “We are going to get you the help you need.”  </p><p>“I should be able to handle this,” Carina said, rubbing her eyes, “I should be able to take care of our kids without being crazy.  I feel like I’m failing them and you.”  </p><p>“Babe,” Maya said, cupping Carina’s face in her hands, meeting their eyes, “You are not failing.  You are not crazy.  Your body just went through one of the most intense hormonal, emotional, and physical changes that a body can experience so it makes perfect sense that the mental changes would follow suit.  You are the most amazing person I know.” </p><p> Carina nodded, leaning on Maya’s shoulder as her wife rubbed her back.  Just then, there was a knock at the door and Danielle walked in.  </p><p>“Uh, oh,” she said, seeing both of their faces, “What’s wrong?”  </p><p>Carina went to speak but found herself unable, turning to her wife.  It was weird for Maya to see Carina being the one who struggled to talk about her mental health, the brunette having always been way more open about the topic while Maya normally was the one to shy away from it with most people.  </p><p>“Carina’s been having a little bit of a hard time,” Maya said, just rubbing her wife’s back, “She hasn’t been sleeping and she’s been checking on the babies constantly and she’s really struggling with thoughts that something bad might happen to them if someone else takes care of them.”  </p><p>Danielle nodded, typing on her iPad, “Sounds like postpartum anxiety, which is something plenty of moms go through, as I know you know.  Can I give you a quick physical exam and then we can talk more about that?”</p><p>  “Si,” Carina said, nodding.  </p><p>“Do you want me to take her?” Maya asked, gesturing to the baby attached to her wife’s chest.  </p><p>“I’ve got her,” Carina said, laying down carefully with the baby.  Danielle was able to give Carina a full exam, giving her a clean bill of health physically.  </p><p>“Now,” Danielle said as Carina got resituated, “I’m going to give you the normal postpartum mental health exam.  Are you ready?  And Maya, you can jump in too if you need to.”  </p><p>Both women nodded, Maya rubbing calming circles on the back of Carina’s hand.  </p><p>“Now, have you been sleeping?” Danielle asked.  </p><p>“Not really,” Carina said, shaking her head as she looked down at Nora who was sleeping soundly in the baby carrier, “Maybe 30 minutes.”  </p><p>“At a time?” Danielle asked. </p><p> “Total in 24 hours,” Carina said quietly, Maya trying her hardest not to react, just squeezing her hand a little tighter.  </p><p>“Ok,” Danielle said, writing that down, “And what’s keeping you up?”  </p><p>“I’m worried that the girls are going to stop breathing or something will happen to them if I fall asleep,” Carina said, tears pricking her eyes.  </p><p>“So you’re up checking on the girls?” Danielle asked, trying more.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded. </p><p> “It was 37 times last night,” Maya said quietly, Carina looking at her.  </p><p>“You kept track?” Carina asked, giving her wife a look.  </p><p>“I’m worried about you, babe,” Maya said, nodding, “And I thought it might be useful for her to know.”</p><p>  “It is helpful,” Danielle said, nodding. </p><p> They went through more questions, both Maya and Carina telling Danielle about how she was struggling to let anyone, even Maya, do so much as hold the babies.  Carina admitted that sitting in the exam room with Maya holding Nora was putting her on the edge of a panic attack, and Maya immediately took the baby out, handing her to Carina just to help her calm down a little. </p><p> By the end of it, Danielle had prescribed Carina a new antianxiety medication along with something to help her get some rest, and Carina had agreed to call her therapist as soon as they got home to start appointments again. </p><p> Maya had decided she was going to work from home as often as possible for the next little bit in order to give Carina the extra support she was going to need.  </p><p>Both of them left feeling a little bit better about the situation, and while they knew that it was probably going to be a long road, they at least had some kind of game plan to guide them through the rough time.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  I debated for a while which one of them was going to have to deal with the postpartum mental health issue because it's not always the person who has the baby who has the problem, but I decided it would be better for it to be Carina.  Any ideas you have for this little family, either with the girls as babies or as they grow, let me know!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. I Want To</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Just a disclaimer: I do not have kids so everything I am writing about is either looked up on google or based on things I have experienced as a babysitter/nanny so if there are mistakes, I'm sorry.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Over the next month and a half, Carina slowly started to feel more like herself as her meds started working and she went to therapy often, for the first few weeks it was twice a week to help her with her postpartum anxiety.   She was now down to once a week and was getting ready to go back to work in a week which was making her super anxious, but she was working on it.  It made her feel a little better that Maya was going to be home with the girls and not some nanny or daycare worker. </p><p>Maya was getting better at being there to support her too, helping her through the irrational panic when someone else wanted to hold the babies or when she woke up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, thinking something was wrong with the twins.  Sleeping was getting better in the past few weeks finally which was helped by the fact that the girls dropped their midnight feed, meaning they slept from 8 pm to 4 am most of the time, and then would go back down from 4:30 until 8 am.  </p><p>Maya had been working in her office again at least a few days a week, needing to get things in order before she went on leave.  Her battalion was relatively used to having no battalion chief in charge, having lost Sullivan right before the pandemic and then having to function without any battalion chief for eleven long months because of the pandemic.  Maya was still going to be around and doing work here and there when she could, but most of her time was going to be spent with her daughters.  </p><p>Today, however, she was at work, trying to get through all her captains one-on-ones before her leave started.  </p><p>Carina was at home with the girls, finally feeling like she was starting to enjoy her time with them.  </p><p>At almost 3 months old, they were getting bigger and more fun. They were both smiling, especially at their Mommy and Mamma, and they were so close to laughing too.  Rowan had started rolling over the week before and Nora was getting close, although she hated tummy time so much that she screamed through most of it every day. </p><p>Carina was feeling particularly tired, although she was blaming at least some of that on the fact that Nora had a hard time sleeping the night before, spending 2-5 am up fussing, not even wanting to eat much at her 4 am feed.  Maya and Carina had taken turned trying to soothe the baby but nothing worked until finally, at 5 am, the little girl had a massive blow out, covering both herself and Maya, who was trying to calm her down, in baby poop.  After a quick shower, Nora had finally settled, just in time for Maya to get up for her run.  </p><p>Carina had never gotten back to sleep after that so after feeding the girls at eight and playing with them for about an hour, she put them in their bassinets before laying down in her own bed, falling asleep quickly.  </p><p>When she woke up, she knew something was wrong.  She had terrible chills, her left breast was beyond painful, and she just felt sick.  She knew immediately what was going on and she grabbed her phone, calling her OB and friend.  </p><p>“Carina,” Danielle said, “Is everything alright?”  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, body protesting as she forced herself to stand up, “I think I have mastitis.  I feel terrible.”  </p><p>“Red and inflamed breast tissue?” Danielle asked, already going to her computer, knowing her colleague knew what the infection looked like. </p><p> “Si,” Carina said, lifting her shirt to confirm, “And a fever I think. And the chills and body aches.”  </p><p>“I’ll put in an antibiotic for you,” Danielle said, “And if the fever doesn’t go away in the next 48 hours or goes over 103 and won’t come down with meds…”  </p><p>“I will come in,” Carina said, “Thank you.”  </p><p>“Of course,” Danielle said, “Feel better.”  </p><p>Carina had had patients complain about this kind of infection before, but experiencing it herself gave her a whole new level of empathy.  </p><p>Her wife was at work and Carina didn’t want to bother her, but she knew Teddy was off today so she called her friend, knowing that she needed someone to go pick up the meds for her because dragging two three month olds out when she felt like this sounded miserable.  Teddy answered on the second ring. </p><p> “Hey Carina,” the cardiothoracic surgeon said, “How are you?”</p><p>  “Well, that’s actually why I’m calling,” Carina said, checking that both babies were still sound asleep in their bassinets before going to grab a glass of water, “I have mastitis and I need someone to pick up the antibiotics.”  </p><p>“And your wife is…?” Teddy asked, confused.  </p><p>“She’s working,” Carina said with a sigh, “And I don’t want to bother her.  This is her last week before maternity leave.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Teddy said, “What pharmacy?” </p><p> Carina told her the information and thanked her before handing up.  She slowly made her way back upstairs, hearing Rowan crying before she even got to the bedroom. </p><p> “I know Patatina,” Carina said, scooping the baby up, “It’s time to eat, isn’t it?” </p><p> Rowan was still crying and Carina could hear Nora stirring in her bassinet too.  As much as it sounded like torture, Carina knew that feeding the girls through this would probably help.  She got set up to feed them, Rowan howling by the time she was ready.  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, getting the babies in position.  </p><p>She actually started crying as she fed the girls, the pain getting worse.  Twenty minutes later, she had just finished feeding the babies and was in the process of getting Nora to burp when she heard someone walking downstairs.  She was a little alarmed for a second before the footsteps approached the bedroom and Maya walked in.  </p><p>“What are you doing home?” Carina asked as Nora let out a big burp, bringing up a little milk.  </p><p>“Well, some little birdie called and told me my wife was sick,” Maya said, raising an eyebrow, “So I canceled my meetings, picked up your meds, and came home.  Babe, why didn’t you call me?”  </p><p>“It’s just mastitis,” Carina said with a sigh, “It’s super common and won’t kill me and you are trying to get everything done before you go on leave.”  </p><p>“Yeah, but Babe, I want to be here for you,” Maya said, walking over to her wife, kissing her forehead, wincing at the heat, “You shouldn’t have to do this alone.”  </p><p>“But you said you had meeting with your captains all week this week,” Carina said as Maya went to change her clothes.  </p><p>“And this afternoon, I was supposed to meet with Andy and Jack,” Maya said, “And luckily, my two former lieutenants understand that when my wife is sick, I need to be with her.”  </p><p>Carina nodded as Maya came back over to the bed, scooping a squirmy Rowan our of Carina’s arms.  Nora was also awake, but much less busy than her sister.  </p><p>“Now, what can I do to help you?” Maya asked.  </p><p>“Can you get me some Tylenol?” Carina asked, yawning, “And a warm compress?”  </p><p>“Warm?”,” Maya asked, confused, “Wouldn’t you want cold for the fever?”  </p><p>“No,” Carian said, shaking her head and lifting her shirt, Maya gasping at how painful the infection looked, “For this.” </p><p> “Oh, babe,” Maya said, frowning, “Yeah.  Of course.”  </p><p>Maya came back a minute later with the requested items, Carina taking the pills before taking the warm wash cloth.  Just then, Nora started crying.  </p><p>“Shhhh,” Carina said, picking up the baby, “She has been unsettled all day.” </p><p> “Let me take them,” Maya said, holding out her hand for Nora, “You look beyond exhausted.”</p><p>  Carina thought about arguing with her, but she actually felt like she had been hit by a truck so she just nodded, handing Nora to Maya.  </p><p>“We will just be downstairs,” Maya said, pressing a kiss into her wife’s too warm forehead, “Just text me if you need me.”  </p><p>“Bring them up at four for their feeding?” Carina asked, “If I’m asleep, wake me up.”  </p><p>“You should sleep if you’re sick,” Maya said, shaking her head, “Plus, doesn’t it hurt to nurse them with an infection?”  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, burying herself under the covers, “I mean, it does hurt, but it is actually advised to nurse through mastitis, it helps it clear faster and it’s not bad for the babies.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, rubbing Carina’s back, “I will bring them up at 4. Like I said, text me if you need me before then.” </p><p>Carina nodded, curling up under the blankets, realizing the days of her wife being able to curl up in bed with her when she felt like complete and utter garbage were over because someone had to watch the babies.  </p><p>Maya thought about offering to stay until Carina was asleep, just to help with her anxiety about not being near the girls, but Nora was really fussy, and the blonde knew Carina wouldn’t be able to fall asleep with all the crying.  </p><p>Carina was asleep within minutes, the fever and lack of sleep the night before taking over quickly and beating the anxiety of the girls being out of her sight.  </p><p>Downstairs, Maya had both girls doing some tummy time.  Nora normally only made it a few minutes, but today, as soon as Maya laid her down, she started screaming.  Maya got Rowan settled before picking Nora up again, the baby still fussy.  </p><p>“Are you not feeling good today either?” Maya asked, frowning as she rubbed the baby’s back.  Nora burped, bringing up more milk. </p><p> “Is your tummy hurting?” Maya asked, wiping the spit up off her shoulder.  </p><p>Nora was still having a hard time settling down so Maya decided some skin to skin would probably help, knowing that almost always calmed their girls down when they weren’t quite themselves.  </p><p>Maya sat on the floor next to Rowan who was looking at her play mat while Nora continued to squirm on her chest, passing gas every once in a while.  Maya ended up changing another nasty diaper before trying to settle the baby again.  </p><p>“I’m sorry you don’t feel good Piccola,” Maya said as Nora burped, this time bringing up a lot of milk before crying.  </p><p>Nora just curled her little legs up to her body, trying to get comfortable on Maya’s chest.  She didn’t feel warm or anything so Maya wasn’t super worried, but to say she wasn’t concerned would be a lie.  </p><p>Rowan eventually had enough of tummy time, rolling herself onto her back and falling asleep on her play mat not long after. </p><p> While Rowan napped, Maya walked around the house with Nora, trying to comfort the baby.  Finally, Nora fell asleep against her mommy, little fingers in her mouth, a habit the baby had started earlier that month that seemed to be sticking around.  Maya sighed, sitting down on the couch where she could keep an eye on both her daughters.  </p><p>As she sat there with Nora curled up on her chest, she grabbed her phone, trying to figure out what might be wrong with her older daughter.  She knew google was no substitute for a doctor, but the doctor in the family was currently upstairs sound asleep and feeling bad herself so Maya settled on trying to figure it out on her own.  </p><p>It was then that she realized that last night, they had ordered one of Carina’s favorite spicy Thai soups for the first time since the babies had been born and according to everything she was reading, that could cause tummy issues in babies.  The good news was, it would work itself out of both Nora and Carina’s systems soon and then, hopefully, Nora would be feeling better.  </p><p>The girls both work up around 3:30, Rowan demanding to be held as soon as her little eyes were open.  Nora seemed to be feeling a little better and even gave Maya a few smiles as she talked to them.  </p><p>“Alright signore,” Maya said, “Let’s go wake up Mamma and get you both fed.”  </p><p>Maya carefully carried them upstairs, opening the master bedroom door.  She found Carina sound asleep, looking miserable.  She hated to wake her but wanted to do everything to help her feel better and that meant feeding the girls. </p><p> “Car,” Maya said, setting Nora down in her bassinet, “IT’s time to feed the babies.”  </p><p>“Non mi sento bene,” Carina mumbled, rolling away.  </p><p>“Lo so,” Maya said, rubbing Carina’s back, “But you said you need to feed the babies to feel better.”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina mumbled, looking at her wife, “You are right.  Can I have the bambinas?”  </p><p>“Sure,” Maya said, handing Carina Rowan, “Although, I’m not sure you should nurse Nora this evening.  Her tummy’s been feeling bad all day and I think it might be the Thai food from last night.”  </p><p>“Oh,” Carina said, kicking herself for not thinking of it, “Yeah.  It should be out of my system soon, though.  It’s been twenty four hours. It should be ok?”  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, handing her their other daughter.  Carina winced, biting her lip as Rowan latched to her infected side. </p><p> “I’m so sorry babe,” Maya said, sitting down next to her and putting a hand on Carina’s back, “Is there anything I can do? Would you like something to eat or drink or anything?”  </p><p>“Maybe something light?” Carina asked, trying to breathe through the nursing pain, “Like some crackers or soup or something?” </p><p> “Sure,” Maya said, “I was going to try to make some soup while you were sleeping, but Nora was so fussy I just couldn’t.” </p><p> “Poor little Piccola,” Carina frowned, rubbing the baby’s back, “I’m sorry Mamma made you feel sick today.”  </p><p>Maya went downstairs, grabbing Carina some crackers and a mug of tea before bringing it upstairs.  </p><p>“I will bring you real dinner later,” Maya said, setting the tea down on the nightstand, “I’m going to order Nonna’s for dinner.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Carina said, handing Maya Rowan to burp.  The baby smiled at her mommy as Maya held her to burp her.  </p><p>“You have been in such a good mood today, Patatina,” Maya said, making a face at the blonde haired baby.  </p><p>Rowan looked at her and Maya thought she was going to smile, but instead, she let out a loud burp. </p><p> “Nicely done,” Maya laughed, settling her daughter into her arms.  </p><p>Carina finished up with Nora, letting Maya burp her too so she could eat some crackers and take some Advil.  </p><p>“We will let you get some rest,” Maya said, giving her wife a kiss as she scooped up the twins, “I’ll bring dinner up in a few hours?”  </p><p>“Can you guys stay?” Carina asked, “I’m not tired enough to sleep right now.  I need to be with them.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, setting Rowan back down on the bed, knowing it had probably been a lot for Carina to go several hours without seeing the girls this afternoon.  </p><p>Within ten minutes, however, Nora was fussy again.  </p><p>“Do you think it wasn’t all out of your system?” Maya asked, trying to comfort her daughter as she whimpered, legs drawn up to her chest.  </p><p>“No lo so,” Carina said, rubbing her eyes, “It takes a while for it to leave her system too so it could be from earlier or it could be new.  I don’t know.  I feel bad I made her sick.” </p><p>“She’ll be ok,” Maya said, rubbing Nora’s back, “According to the internet, she will be uncomfortable for a little while, but nothing bad will happen.”  </p><p>“You were googling what was wrong with our daughter?” Carina asked, brow raised as Maya stripped herself and Nora down again, hoping the skin contact would help ease some of the tummy pain.  </p><p>“I was worried,” Maya said, “She’s still so little, and I was scared she might be sick or something.”  </p><p>“Poor Nora,” Carina said, putting a hand on her daughter’s cheek.  </p><p>“I always thought you would be the one to take care of them when they were sick,” Maya said, rubbing Nora’s back as she let out a little gas, grunting.  </p><p>“Why?” Carina asked, making a face at Rowan who was staring up at her.  </p><p>“I don’t know,” Maya said, “Because you are so nurturing and caring and always have been, and I don’t know how to take care of sick people.”  </p><p>“You have always done a good job taking care of me,” Carina said, looking at her wife, “And I know you helped Andy through the flu while Robert was out of the country.  You are good at taking care of people, and Nora clearly agrees.”  </p><p>Nora had settled into Maya’s chest, clearly still not feeling well, but at least a little comfortable on Mommy.  </p><p>“But this isn’t anything serious,” Maya said, “It’s just an upset tummy from food.  It’s not like she needs much and it’s not going to hurt her.”  </p><p>“But you are giving her the one thing she does need,” Carina said, “Which is someone to hold her and try to help her get comfortable.  You are excellent at that.”  </p><p>Maya smiled, looking at her wife, “Thank you.”  </p><p>Just then, Nora had another massive blowout all over Maya’s bare chest. </p><p> “And apparently, she needs me to poop on too,” Maya groaned as Carina laughed. </p><p> Just then, they heard another sound and looked down, seeing Rowan laughing.  </p><p>“You think this is funny Ro?” Maya asked cheekily, looking down at the baby, “You think Mommy getting pooped on twice in one day is funny?” </p><p> Rowan just laughed more as Carina grabbed her phone to capture the sweet sounds.  Maya made some faces at Rowan, the little baby laughing more.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, standing up with Nora, “We are going for shower round two.  You got her?”  </p><p>“You mean the laughing machine?” Carina said, tickling Rowan and getting another laugh, “Si.  Go get you two cleaned up.”  </p><p>In the shower, Nora spit up again, Maya just letting the warm water run over them, knowing that when she had an upset stomach, warm water always felt good.  </p><p>Nora eventually settled more, just about falling asleep as they got out.  Maya quickly dressed the baby, Nora falling asleep in Carina’s arms while Maya got dressed in clean pajamas.  </p><p>“I’m glad she finally settled down,” Carina said, looking at the sleeping little girl in her arms, “It’s so hard seeing her like that.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said, “I am not looking forward to them getting sick for real.”  </p><p>“Me neither,” Carina said, shaking her head as she yawned.  </p><p>“Do you want me to take her?” Maya asked, bringing Carina another warm compress.</p><p>“Maybe,” Carina said, “Sorry.  I am starting to feel bad again.” </p><p> “Don’t apologize,” Maya said, taking Nora, “You’re sick.  We can go so you can sleep.”  </p><p>“They are both asleep,” Carina said, gesturing to Rowan who was stretched out asleep in the bed, learning how to laugh apparently exhausting, “Can you stay?” </p><p> “Sure,” Maya said, knowing Carina was very clingy when she didn’t feel well, “Let me just move Ro and then you can cuddle.”  </p><p>Maya carefully scooped Rowan up, putting her in her bassinet before sitting down on the bed, Nora still in her arms, Maya deciding that an upset tummy warranted napping in Mommy’s arms, something she and Carina normally tried to avoid.  </p><p>Carina cuddled closer to her wife, Maya rubbing her back. </p><p> “Thank you for staying,” Carina said sleepily.  </p><p>“Of course,” Maya said, “There is nowhere else I would rather be.”  </p><p>That night was rough even after Maya gave Nora a bottle of pumped milk.   Nora was clearly still not feeling well, leaving Maya to change several more messy diapers and pace the hallway for half the night, trying to give the little girl some comfort as her tummy continued to rumble.<br/>
Carina also didn’t sleep great, both because Nora wasn’t feeling well and because of her fever that sent her through terrible rounds of chills and hot flashes. </p><p> By the next morning, Carina’s fever was going down, Nora’s tummy was feeling better, and both of them were resting peacefully.  Maya, however, was up with Rowan who had slept like a champ and was ready to play.  </p><p>“Mamma and Nora are sleeping,” Maya said, holding Rowan as they walked into the kitchen, “They were both not feeling good last night, but they are better today, but for now, it’s just me and you, Ro.  What should we do?”  </p><p>Rowan just kicked her little legs, smiling at Maya.  </p><p>“Coffee?” Maya said, looking at the baby, “Perfect idea.  And then, I am going to make some soup for Mamma.”  </p><p>Rowan just stared at her, spitting a little.  Maya grabbed a bouncy seat, something the girls had grown to like more in the past few months, bringing it into the kitchen so she could keep an eye on Rowan while she cooked.  The baby was happy, chewing on her hands and batting at the toys above her as Maya made soup.  </p><p>Once she was done, she picked Rowan up, going upstairs to check on Carina and Nora.  Carina was still out cold, but Nora was awake in her bassinet.  </p><p>“Come here Piccola,” Maya said, picking her up, “Are you feeling better today?” </p><p> Nora smiled at Maya as they left the bedroom.  Maya took the girls downstairs, laying them on their play mat, deciding to try tummy time with Nora again today.  While the little girl was disgruntled, she didn’t start crying immediately which Maya took as a good sign.  She went into the kitchen, grabbing herself another cup of coffee before coming back into the living room, surprised when she saw Nora on her back. </p><p> “Did you roll over while I was gone?” Maya said, looking down at the baby who was happy on her back. </p><p> The baby gurgled, kicking her legs and moving her arms as she looked up at Mommy. </p><p> “You are too much,” Maya said, sitting down next to the play mat. </p><p> She rolled Nora back over onto her belly, turning the girls so they could look at each other.  That’s how Carina found them ten minutes later when she made her way downstairs.  </p><p>“Hey babe,” Maya said, getting up to meet her, “How are you feeling?” </p><p> “Better,” Carina said, walking into Maya’s arms, “I’ve had two doses of antibiotics now so it’s helping.  I still don’t feel great, but better than yesterday.”  </p><p>“Good,” Maya said as they both walked into the living room, “The girls are just doing tummy time.” </p><p> “They are both on their backs?” Carina said, confused. </p><p> “They weren’t a minute ago,” Maya said, “Nora learned how to roll over this morning.”  </p><p>“I’m glad she is feeling better,” Carina said, smiling as they both sat down near the playmat.  </p><p>“Me too,” Maya said, nodding, “Though I think it would be wise if you avoided spicy food until you’re done nursing them.  Or at least not nurse her when you eat it.”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, nodding as she leaned her head on Maya’s shoulder, “I felt so bad that I made her feel sick yesterday.”  </p><p>“You didn’t know,” Maya said, shaking her head, “And now that you do, you can change it.”</p><p>  Carina smiled at Maya before they both looked down at the babies who were kicking happily on their play mat.  </p><p>“As terrible as I felt yesterday,” Carina said, “Having all four of us home together right now almost makes it all worth it.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, leaning over and kissing her wife, knowing they only had days before the whole dynamic of their house was going to shift when she went on leave and Carina headed back to work.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  The next chapter is going to be Carina going back to work and Maya going on leave.  If you have any suggestions of things you want to see for this story, or any other Marina prompt, let me know because I don't have any firm plans for anything past the next chapter.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. One Starting One Ending</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Their maternity leaves were overlapping for two days.  Maya had gone back to work for two days after Carina started feeling better, working late both days as she got ready to go on leave.  </p><p>She was still planning on doing a little work when she had time, but that was going to be minimal because she wanted to spend as much time as she could with the girls and Carina when she wasn’t working.  </p><p>As the day arrived for her to go on leave, however, Maya found herself getting more and more anxious about what would happen.  She knew everything would be fine, but because she had just earned this promotion, she worried about being judged by others, worried about letting her boss down, and worried about what would happen in her absence.  </p><p>On her last day in her office, Andy came in as she was working long after she should have gone home.  </p><p>“Why are you still here?” her best friend asked, sitting down.  </p><p>“I’m just trying to make sure I have all my files in order,” Maya said, shrugging. </p><p> “You’re having a hard time with this, aren’t you?” Andy asked, “Going on leave I mean.”  </p><p>“I’m excited about the time I am going to get with Nora and Rowan,” Maya said with a sigh, “But leaving all of this… I don’t know… Do I sound like a bad mom because I’m having second thoughts about being off for 3 months?  That I’m kinda starting to dread just being the babies 24/7?”</p><p>  “No,” Andy said, shaking her head, “You are allowed to love your kids and your job.  And it’s a change, a big one for the next few months.” </p><p>Maya nodded, putting another file on her shelf.  </p><p>“I promise to keep you in the loop with everything happening here,” Andy said as Maya put one last binder on her shelf, “Now, come on, your desk is immaculate, your files are away.  Go home.  It’s almost midnight.  I’m sure Carina is waiting for you.”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, “I texted her and told her it was going to be late tonight.  Hopefully, she and the girls are all asleep when I get home.  Why are you up?”  </p><p>“Couldn’t sleep,” Andy said, shrugging, “Robert and I were going over adoption paperwork before shift today, and it’s all a lot.”  </p><p>Robert and Andy had finally decided that they were going to adopt to grow their family which would let Andy keep working instead of going through another pregnancy.  Also, for as much as Andy wanted another baby, her pregnancy with Luca had been rough on her body, ending up with her on bed rest for the last two months of being pregnant so not going through that again seemed like a good idea. </p><p>“How is it going?”  Maya asked as she packed her bag.  </p><p>“We’re in the middle of background checks right now,” Andy said, “Which means we are going to have to explain Robert’s arrest from during the pandemic which our lawyer insists won’t be an issue because he wasn’t officially charged, but it’s still nerve racking.  And his trial here and his addiction which hopefully won’t be an issue.  It shouldn’t according to Washington rules.  I mean, he’s been clean for almost five years and he goes to AA and does everything he’s supposed to.” </p><p> “Well, if there’s anything you need, let me know,” Maya said, “I was there during that whole thing, and I still can’t believe what happened.” </p><p> Andy nodded, not particularly enjoying thinking back to that time in their lives.  </p><p>“Actually, I was going to ask, could you write a letter for us,” Andy said as Maya stood there, “Like a letter of recommendation basically, just saying we would be good parents.  I can send you the official thing.”  </p><p>“Of course,” Maya said, nodding, knowing she knew Robert and Andy better than just about anyone, “I would be happy to.  Any kid would be lucky to have you two as parents, and Luca as a brother.  He’s so sweet with the girls.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Andy said, “I’ll send it to you.  Now, go.  Get home to your wife and daughters.  I’ll bring Luca by for a playdate soon.”  </p><p>“Bye Andy,” Maya said, smiling at her friend, “Get some sleep.”  </p><p>Just then, the alarm started going off, sending the captain running downstairs.  Maya watched as A shift loaded into their vehicles before she went out to her car, driving home.  </p><p>Maya quietly walked into the house, putting her bag away before going up to their bedroom, finding all three of her girls sleeping.  She walked over to the bassinets the girls were in, leaning down and kissing each of them on the forehead before changing into her pajamas, getting ready for bed before slipping in next to Carina.  </p><p>The brunette rolled over, eyes cracking open. </p><p>“You’re home,” she smiled sleepily.  </p><p>“I am,” Maya said, leaning over and giving her a kiss, “For the next three months.  Now, go back to sleep.” </p><p> Carina nodded as Maya wrapped her arms around her wife as they both drifted off.  </p><p>The following day, they just spent time together as a family, the day feeling much like a normal day that Maya had off.  They took the girls on a walk, went out for lunch, and just enjoyed time as a family.  Carina had therapy around 2, but other than that, the entire day was spent together. </p><p> The day after, however, was much different.  Carina woke up in the middle of the night having a panic attack, practically jumping out of bed to check on the babies, collapsing into Maya’s arms once she realized they were alright.  </p><p>“I’m right here,” Maya said softly, holding Carina as she struggled to get her breath back.  </p><p>“It was terrible,” Carina said after she calmed down, “I dreamed I woke up and they had both stopped breathing.”  </p><p>“They are ok,” Maya said, pulling her close, “They are breathing and their hearts are beating and they are sleeping.  They are safe and you are safe.” </p><p> Carina nodded, holding onto Maya.  It took almost two hours, but eventually, Carina fell back to sleep.  That didn’t last long, however, the girls waking up at 4 am for their feeding.  Neither mom fell asleep after that, just sitting in bed, Maya’s arm wrapped around Carina.  </p><p>“It is going to be ok,” Maya said, pressing a kiss behind her wife’s ear.  </p><p>Carina nodded, just leaning into Maya’s arms.  The girls woke up for the day at 8, Carina feeding them again before the entire family went downstairs.  Normally, the girls would do tummy time first thing in the morning, but today, all Carina wanted was to hold the girls.  </p><p>“I don’t know if I can go back tomorrow,” Carina said, looking down as Nora stuck her hand in her mouth.  </p><p>“Babe,” Maya said, drawing her attention up to her face, “You can do it.  You want to go back.  You love your job.” </p><p> “But what if something happens while I’m gone?” Carina asked, feeling her anxiety rise.  </p><p>“Then I will be right here with them,” Maya said, “I will be here if anything happens.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, trying to let that make her feel better.  Carina held the girls for most of the day, just needing to be with them.  </p><p>“You need to eat,” Maya said around the girls 2:30 nap time, “Let’s put them in their bassinets and have some lunch.”  </p><p>“I… alright,” Carina said, handing Nora to Maya.  </p><p>They carried them upstairs, laying them down.  Carina just watched them, feeling like she did when they were newborns.  </p><p>“They are ok,” Maya said, strapping on the monitors to the babies’ feet, “We can watch their heartrates and oxygen levels.  Come on.  Let’s go eat.” </p><p> Carina took a deep breath, pulling herself away from the sides of the bassinets.  Maya made them lunch before they both sat down to eat.  </p><p>“Carina, they are going to be fine,” Maya reassured her, “I will send you pictures all day and we can facetime when you are free, and you are only working during the days for now, and it’s only parttime for the first two weeks.  Everything will be alright.” </p><p> “Logically, I know that,” Carina sighed, stirring the soup Maya had made around her bowl, “But… No lo so… It’s like every time I start thinking about the babies, my brain turns it into something scary that could happen to them and I can’t make it stop.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said, nodding, “I know it’s hard, but you can do it.” </p><p> “Maybe I should just quit my job,” Carina said, biting her lip. </p><p> “If that is what you want, we will find a way to make it work,” Maya said, “But I don’t think that’s really what you want.”  </p><p>“How do you know what I want?” Carina said angrily, “I want my babies to be safe.”  </p><p>“Our babies,” Maya mumbled, knowing it didn’t really matter, but she wanted to remind her wife that they were in this together, “You want our babies to be safe, and they will be.  They will be here with me, their very capable other mother who happens to be a trained EMT and fire fighter.  I can keep them safe, Car.  And I know that if you quit your job, you would be miserable in a few years when the girls are in school because you love what you do, saving moms and helping women with issues that don’t get nearly enough attention.  You will get bored around here and eventually, you will start to resent our kids and you can ask Andy what it feels like to be resented by a parent.” </p><p> “I know,” Carina said, looking down at her hands, tears filling her eyes faster than she could blink them away and soon, she was sobbing, “I just want to be there for them.  I don’t want them to think I abandon them.” </p><p> At that moment, it clicked for both of them, what was causing the bulk of Carina’s anxiety about going back to work.  Sure, she was still dealing with her postpartum hormones and the anxiety that was creating, but really, at the root of it, Carina was terrified to become her mother, to make her kids feel how she felt as a child when she was left.  </p><p>“Oh babe,” Maya said, getting up and wrapping Carina in a hug, “The girls won’t think you abandon them because you will still be here.  You will be home with them plenty, and if you are gone some of the time, it will just make them miss you a little which will make them happier to see you when you come home. It is good for you to work too, so you can miss them and not resent them.  You aren’t abandoning them when you go to work.  You are just showing them that Mamma is a badass who saves lives and still comes home to them and loves them so hard.  You working does not make you a bad mom, Car.  I personally think it will make you a better mom because you will have something that you can do outside of the girls so they don’t wear you down.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, still sobbing into Maya’s chest.  They moved to the couch, lunch forgotten as Maya just held Carina, trying to help her calm down.  About an hour and a half after the girls went down, they heard a cry coming from upstairs.  </p><p>“I bet it Rowan,” Maya said, getting up. </p><p> “That girl sleeps like her mommy,” Carina nodded, laughing a little, “Not a lot.” </p><p> “She sleeps way more than me,” Maya said, shaking her head, “But you’re right.  Compared to Nora, Ro is not great at sleeping.”  </p><p>Maya’s insomnia was something she had struggled with since she could remember, having vivid memories of being 7 or 8 and lying in bed wide awake for hours at a time, too anxious to sleep.  She was pretty sure it started when her dad started training her a lot, causing more stress on little Maya than her brain could handle. </p><p> Maya hated her dad for destroying her ability to sleep through the night even as an adult, yet another lasting effect from his decades of abuse, and she was determined to never let that happen to her daughters.  They went upstairs, finding that actually, both babies were awake.  </p><p>“Good afternoon,” Maya said, scooping Rowan up while Carina grabbed Nora. </p><p> They took them downstairs, Carina feeding them before just holding them tight, talking to them while they just sat there.  Maya sat there with them, just watching her wife interact with their daughters, realizing this was going to be her life, full time, for the next three months.  </p><p>She wasn’t sure she was going to feel the same way as her wife about returning to work.  She felt a little guilty already thinking about going back to work when she had been on maternity leave for all of 36 hours, but she pushed those thoughts out of her head for now, hoping that once she got into a groove with the babies, that she would enjoy being home with her daughters. </p><p> “How am I going to leave them tomorrow?” Carina sighed as Rowan smiled at her.  </p><p>“It’s probably going to be hard,” Maya said, putting an arm around her wife, “And however you feel about it tomorrow, that’s ok, but you are going to do it because you need to.”  </p><p>“Lo so,” Carina said, leaning down and kissing Nora’s fluffy brown hair, “I will do it.”  </p><p>“And then you will come home and snuggle with them and they will know how much you love them,” Maya said, kissing Carina’s cheek. </p><p> The rest of the day was mostly spent just hanging out on the couch, Carina holding the girls except for when they had their late afternoon nap.  Maya made dinner then while Carina grabbed out her work bag, checking what her schedule was for the following day, smiling when she saw one of her favorite patients was on the schedule. She did a little bit of paperwork she needed to get done before the girls woke up again.  They had dinner and spent a little more time with the girls before going upstairs to get ready for bed.  </p><p>They gave the girls a bath before dressing them in pajamas, Carina giving them their last feed before putting them to bed at 8 pm.  The two moms then went downstairs, watching part of a movie before going to bed.  </p><p>The night was not the least bit restful for Carina, the brunette waking up about an hour after falling asleep because her thoughts were racing.  She tried to calm down, but it just wasn’t happening and she spend the entire night awake. </p><p> She fed the twins around four, Maya waking up a little, but quickly falling back to sleep once the girls were settled.  Carina, however, had been nauseous all night, and around 5, got up and went into the bathroom, feeling like she was about to be sick.  </p><p>When Maya woke up at 5:30, she was a little confused about where her wife was, but she saw the bathroom door closed, figuring she had just gotten up to use the bathroom.  Maya got out of bed, pulling on her running clothes.  </p><p>However, once she was completely ready for her run, Carina was still in the bathroom.  </p><p>Concerned, she quietly knocked, “Car, babe.  Are you ok?”  </p><p>“I don’t know,” Carina mumbled, and Maya slowly opened the door, gasping a little when she saw her wife sitting on the floor next to the toilet, looking terrible.  </p><p>“Are you sick babe?” Maya asked, kneeling down next to her, hand on her forehead, noting the lack of a fever. </p><p> “Just really really anxious,” Carina said, shaking her head, “I just can’t stop thinking about going back to work and how I am going to leave the babies and…”  </p><p>Carina was cut off by her stomach, leaning over the toilet and retching while Maya held her hair and rubbed her back.  </p><p>“It’s ok, babe,” Maya said, “Take deep breaths.  You are going to be alright.”  </p><p>Carina’s stomach calmed again and the woman leaned back, Maya flushing the toilet before grabbing her a cup of water.  </p><p>“I hate when this happens,” Carina mumbled, rubbing her eyes.  </p><p>“I know,” Maya nodded, having gone through this with her wife before, once the night before her father’s funeral, another time the night before she proposed which Maya didn’t know at the time, but figured out later, “But you will be alright.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, leaning her head on Maya’s shoulder.  Eventually, Carina’s stomach calmed and they got up, going back into their bedroom.  They spent the next hour and a half curled up in bed, Maya just trying to help her wife calm down.  </p><p>“I need to get ready,” Carina groaned, seeing it was already 7, “I have work at 9, and I want to feed the babies before I go.”  </p><p>“What can I do?” Maya asked as Carina got up.  </p><p>“I don’t know,” the doctor said, pulling out some clothes, “Coffee?  I didn’t really sleep last night.”  </p><p>“You should have woken me up,” Maya frowned, getting out of bed. </p><p> Carina just shrugged, going to get a shower while Maya went to make coffee and toast to help calm Carina’s anxious stomach.  </p><p>Once it was ready, she brought it upstairs, finding Rowan awake in her bassinet. </p><p> “Good morning Patatina,” Maya said, picking up the little girl as she smiled, “Did you sleep well?”  </p><p>Rowan cooed a little, smiling again at Maya.  The two blondes went into the bathroom, finding Carina drying her hair.  </p><p>“Coffee, toast, and baby kisses,” Maya said, setting down the plate and cup before holding Rowan so Carina could give her a kiss, “I’ll keep her entertained until you’re ready.” </p><p> Carina nodded as Maya walked out of the bathroom.  She went and dressed Rowan, having plans for the morning.  She then went and found Nora awake too, quickly getting her ready before going back into the master bedroom, Carina just coming out of the bathroom.  </p><p>“Why are they already dressed?” Carina asked, sitting down on the bed to get ready to feed them.  </p><p>“Well, I was thinking,” Maya said, handing her Rowan then Nora, “I still need to get a run in, and the hospital is only 7 blocks from here, and it’s not too cold so we are going to walk you to work today, and then I am going to take them on a jog.”</p><p>  “Seriously?” Carina asked, looking at Maya.  </p><p>“Yeah,” the blonde said, not quite able to read her wife’s expressions, “If that’s ok?” </p><p> “That is perfect,” Carina nodded, tears welling up in her eyes, “Si.  Grazie Bambina.”  </p><p>“I just thought it might make you feel a little better about leaving them,” Maya said, nodding, “And we have that nice jogging stroller that I have only used once, but now that I’m on leave, I think it’s time to break it in.”  </p><p>“Baciami,” Carina said, unable to move because there were two babies attached to her.  </p><p>Maya obliged before going downstairs, getting everything she would need to take the girls on a run including blankets, their jackets, booties, and hats.  </p><p>Once everything was ready and Carina was done feeding them, they family of four headed out.  The walk to the hospital only took about 15 minutes and soon enough, they were walking in and heading up to Carina’s office.  </p><p>“Why is my light on?” Carina wondered, confused.  </p><p>“Welcome back,” Amelia, Teddy, Andrew, Bailey, and Maggie called as they walked in.  </p><p>“What…” Carina said, startled a little before smiling, “Thank you.”  </p><p>Everyone walked over to the door, cooing over the babies.  Carina took them out, handing Rowan to Teddy and Nora to Maggie.  They all went over to the couch, Maya smiling as she watched her wife talk to her friends. </p><p> “Amelia,” Maya said before the neurosurgeon could walk away, “Thank you for this.  She’s been so anxious about coming back.”  </p><p>“This was a good idea,” Amelia nodded, “I’m glad you asked me to do it.  I know how hard it is to come back to work after having a baby and I wasn’t struggling like she had been.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, sighing as she watched their friend pass the girls around, knowing she was about to have to leave. </p><p> Just then, Teddy, Amelia, and Bailey’s pagers started going off, all of them running for the pit.  </p><p>“I need to go too,” Maggie said, “Winston and I have our cake tasting in an hour.” </p><p> “Have fun,” Carina called as her friend left.  </p><p>This left Andrew and Carina holding the girls.  </p><p>“I need to go too,” Andrew said, kissing his niece before handing her to Maya, “Welcome back Carina.”  </p><p>“Grazie Andrea,” she said, smiling, “See you later.”  </p><p>The younger Deluca nodded before leaving.  </p><p>“I have my first patient in five minutes,” Carina sighed, looking down at the baby in her arms, “I don’t want to say goodbye.”  </p><p>“You can do this,” Maya said, “Give them both a kiss, and then we are going to go.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, kissing both her daughters before helping Maya strap them into the jogging stroller, tears welling up in her eyes.  </p><p>“You’ve got this babe,” Maya said, giving her a gentle kiss, wiping the tear off her cheek, “The girls and I are going to be fine today and we will see you at 1.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, giving the girls one more kiss.  </p><p>“Ciao,” Carina called as Maya walked out of her office, “Ti amo tutti.”</p><p>  “We love you too,” Maya called, pushing the girls to the elevator.  </p><p>Carina then went into her office, going through a breathing technique she had done with her therapist to calm down.  </p><p>Just then, a nurse knocked on her door, alerting her that her first patient was there.  Carina took one more deep breath before putting on her white coat for the first time since she had had the babies, walking out of her office to see her first patient.  </p><p>The day went a lot faster than Carina thought it would which was good.  She even ended up delivering a baby unexpectedly when two women were ready to deliver at the same time.  </p><p>She walked back into her office, exhausted from her day and from not sleeping the night before.  </p><p>She was startled for the second time that day when she saw her wife sitting on the couch, Rowan in her arms and Nora asleep in the stroller.  </p><p>“What are you doing here?” Carina asked, smiling as she quickly washed her hands before taking Rowan from Maya. </p><p> “Well, I thought you might be hungry considering you ate half a piece of toast this morning,” Maya said, “So the girls and I stopped by Nonna’s and got some soup and sandwiches.  </p><p>“I love you so much,” Carina said, sitting down and kissing her wife.  </p><p>“I love you too,” Maya said, smiling, “How was your first day back?”  </p><p>“It went really well,” Carina smiled as Rowan looked up at her, smiling, “I even delivered a bambino.”  </p><p>“So it was good to be back?” Maya asked, picking up Nora who had started to fuss.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, “You were right.  I needed this.  How was your day?”  </p><p>“Well, I went for a run which they slept through,” Maya said, opening the soup containers, “And then they did some tummy time and I washed their laundry.  I made dinner for tonight, and then fed them before loading them up again and bringing them here.  It was not a super thrilling day, but it was good.”  </p><p>The four of them had lunch together before heading home, Carina finally feeling like maybe, just maybe, she would actually be able to do this.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  I have been working on future chapters of this story, but I still need something to connect this one to those.  Any ideas for that, or any ideas at all you have for this story in general would be happily accepted! Thanks for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. I'm Failing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been a month since Carina had gone back to work, and Carina was adjusting well.  Maya’s updates throughout the day made it easier.  </p><p>Maya on the other hand, was not having as easy of a time.  Carina was now back to normal schedule, and got stuck with the night shift for two weeks, leaving Maya alone at night with the girls four nights a week, which was more in the past week because there was some virus going around that had the hospital short staffed.  </p><p> Maya loved her daughters, she truly did, but it was all getting to be a lot.  There were days that Maya couldn’t remember the last time she showered and nights when the girls wouldn’t sleep for her while Carina was working meant she was getting next to no sleep. </p><p> It had also been raining non-stop since a week after Carina went back to work, meaning taking the girls out was impossible and Maya was barely finding three days a week to run anymore. </p><p> Rowan was stubborn and refused to take her bottle at least once a day, much preferring to nurse meaning Maya had a hungry, agitated baby on her hands who was impossible to soothe.  Nora, on the other hand, now refused to nurse and only had a bottle even when Carina was home. </p><p> The girls were also going through some sleep regression that was apparently normal at their age, but that didn’t make being up with them at 3 am every night for three days any easier.  Maya was starting to have a hard time with all of it and there were days when she felt like she didn’t know what to do with the girls.  She felt like she was drowning in babies and bottles and laundry and diapers, and even on nights the girls slept, Maya’s insomnia was starting to get bad again, but she couldn’t take anything on nights when Carina was gone.  </p><p>She had been to therapy a total of one time since the girls were born which meant she wasn’t doing well processing anything. </p><p> Carina came home from the night shift one morning to find Maya in bed, the twins lying next to her as tears rolled down the blonde’s cheeks.  </p><p>“What’s wrong Bambina?” Carina asked concerned.  </p><p>“I can’t do this,” the blonde said, “I am not cut out to be a mom.  Rowan wouldn’t take her bottle last night and wouldn’t sleep and I don’t know what to do and I can’t do this.”  </p><p>“Oh Bambina,” Carina said, climbing into bed with her girls, “It’s going to be ok.  You are a great mom.”  </p><p>Maya just sobbed as Carina held her.  Eventually, the babies started fussing and Maya moved to get them.  </p><p>“No,” Carina stopped her, “I’ve got them.”  </p><p>Carina picked up the twins, knowing it was time for them to eat.  </p><p>“I’ll be right back,” Carina said, “Just relax.” </p><p> Carina went downstairs, grabbing a bottle for Nora before taking the girls back upstairs. </p><p> “Let me feed Nora,” Maya said, sitting up as Carina came in the room.  </p><p>Carina nodded, handing the bottle and baby to Maya.  </p><p>“What’s going on, Maya?” Carina asked after both babies started eating. </p><p> “I don’t know,” Maya admitted, “I’m just so tired and I don’t know how to help them and I don’t feel like a person anymore.” </p><p> “Oh Bambina,” Carina sighed, wrapping her arm around her wife, “It’s going to be alright.”  </p><p>“I am failing at being a mom,” Maya said, starting to cry again.  </p><p>“You are not,” Carina said, shaking her head, “You are doing a great job.  The girls are happy and growing and doing everything they should be because you are here with them.  And you know I wouldn’t leave you with them if I didn’t think you were taking care of them.  The only reason I can keep my anxiety in check while I am working is because I know you are with them, taking care of them.”  </p><p>“Can we talk about this after we put them down for a nap?” Maya asked, burping Nora before laying the baby down to finish her bottle, “I can’t do this right now.”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, readjusting Rowan before putting her hand back on Maya’s back.  </p><p>Within twenty minutes, both babies were burped, changed, and napping in their cribs.  They were having them nap in their cribs so they got used to it because Carina was convinced that once they got over this sleep regression, they would be ready to sleep through the night in their own room.  </p><p>After the babies were down, Maya and Carina went back into their room, Maya immediately burrowing under the covers.  </p><p>“Bambina,” Carina sighed, sitting down next to her, “Come on.  We need to talk about this.  What is going on?” </p><p> “I can’t do this,” Maya said, pulling the covers off her head, “I can’t be their mom.  I don’t know how and I feel like I’m drowning and I just can’t do it anymore.  I shouldn’t have been so stupid to think that I would ever be able to be a mother.”  </p><p>“Hey,” Carina said, pulling Maya close as the blonde sobbed, “Hey.  It is going to be ok.” </p><p> Maya cried for a long time, Carina rubbing her back and trying to help her calm down.  Maya eventually cried herself to sleep, Carina just sitting there with her, realizing that her wife needed her more than the charts and laundry she had wanted to get done this morning.  </p><p>Carina knew Maya had been having a little bit of a hard time with not working, but she hadn’t realized it had gotten this bad.  She grabbed her phone, texting Vic to see if maybe the firefighter would want to come spend a few hours with the twins so Carina and Maya could talk.  Vic said she would love to, and that she would be over in about half an hour.  </p><p>Carina leaned down, pressing a kiss into the blonde hair that clearly hadn’t been washed in days.  The doctor had been trying so hard to make sure Maya was doing alright with being home, but clearly she had missed some warning signs because this didn’t just happen overnight.  She had noticed that Maya seemed a little distance and tired, but she was taking care of two infants who were not sleeping great.  </p><p>How her wife was right now reminded her of when the blonde had first been diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression not long after they got back together and moved in together during the pandemic.  There was a stretch of two weeks where Maya only left the bed to go to work.  </p><p>She was on medication and had been in therapy until the girls were born, both of which helped, but Maya would go through periods of time where her depression would get overwhelming, though the episodes were now much more uncommon.  However, it was still fairly common for Maya to have what she deemed a  “bad day” where her depression won and she struggled to function about four to six times a year.  </p><p>This, though, seemed to be more than just one bad day, like it had been building for a while now.  It had been hard to watch then, and it was hard now. Carina was kicking herself for not thinking about that.  She just sat there with Maya, rubbing her back. </p><p> She got a text from Vic, saying she was there.  Carina shot her a message with their garage code in it, telling her they were in the bedroom.  She debated getting up to greet Vic, but Maya was laying on her chest, and she had no desire to move the woman who was clearly exhausted.  Vic appeared in the doorway a few minutes later. </p><p> “Is she alright?” Vic asked, motioning to Maya.  </p><p>“Not really,” Carina said, shaking her head, “But she will be.  The girls will probably be up soon.  They should be good to just play and be held for like 3 hours before they need to eat again.  Hopefully, we won’t need longer than that.”  </p><p>“Well, I am free until this evening,” Vic said, “And even that is just pizza and movies with Travis so it’s not a big deal if you still need me.” </p><p> “Thank you so much for coming, Vic,” Carina nodded, smiling.  </p><p>“Of course,” Vic said, “Let me know if you guys need anything.”  </p><p>About half an hour later, Maya stirred in Carina’s arms.  </p><p>“Where are the babies?” Maya asked, suddenly wide awake.  </p><p>“They’re downstairs with Vic,” Carina said, pulling Maya close.  </p><p>“Why?” Maya asked, rubbing her eyes. </p><p> “Because we need to talk,” Carina said, looking at her wife.  </p><p>“About what?” Maya asked, confused.  </p><p>“About the fact that you are not ok,” Carina said, “And that you haven’t been telling me that you are not ok.”  </p><p>“I’m fine,” Maya mumbled, looking down at her hands, “I just need to sleep.”  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “You and I both know that is not what is going on here.” </p><p> “I just didn’t think it was going to be this hard,” Maya said, tears starting again, “I feel like nothing I do is enough, and I don’t even know what I’m doing and I feel so alone in all of it.”  </p><p>“Maya, I’m right here with you,” Carina said, “I’m in it with you, all the way.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said, “But you know about babies.  Maybe you were right.  Maybe you should have just stayed home.”  </p><p>“Bambina,” Carina said, pulling Maya close, “You are doing a good job, a great job, with the girls.  You are a great mom.”  </p><p>“They don’t sleep and Rowan won’t eat for me and I don’t sleep,” Maya cried, “And I don’t see anyone except the babies most of the time and I don’t know.  I just… I am…”  </p><p>“Maya,” Carina said, hugging her tighter, “I know.  I know it is so hard and frustrating with how little the girls are sleeping, but bambina, that is not on you.  Amelia went through the same thing with Harper a few months ago, and my patients complain about it all the time.  And Rowan is just stubborn, just like her mommy.  She is still growing so missing one feed here and there is not the end of the world.  Maya, you are doing an amazing job taking care of our babies.  However, there is one thing you are not doing an amazing job at.”  </p><p>“What?” Maya asked, more tears streaming down her face, “At taking care of the laundry and cleaning because I know I have been slacking on both and I’m sorry.”  </p><p>“No, bambina,” Carina said, shaking her head, “No.  You are not responsible for taking care of everything.  We are partners in this.”  </p><p>“But I am home all day doing nothing,” Maya said, “I should be taking care of it.  It’s my job.”  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, “Absolutely not.  Where did you get these ideas from?”  </p><p>“I…” Maya started, thinking about why she thought that before more tears filled her eyes, “Lane.  He used to say it to my mom all the time.”  </p><p>“Oh Maya,” Carina said as her wife broke down again.  </p><p>After this round of sobbing ended, Carina pressed another kiss into Maya’s temple.  </p><p>“What am I not doing well?” Maya asked, wiping her eyes.  </p><p>“Cosa?” Carina asked, confused.  “You said there’s something I’m not doing a good job at,” Maya said, “What is it?  Just tell me so I can fix it.”  </p><p>“Oh,”  Carina said, “Si.  You are not taking very good care of my favorite person.  Maya, you are not taking care of you, and I know I haven’t been doing a good job being here for you either, and I’m sorry.  Bambina, when you start to feel like this, you have to talk to me.  You always used to talk to me about it.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said, tears streaming down her face, “But I know that you were having a hard time going back to work and I didn’t want to make it any harder or make you think I can’t take care of the babies.  I want you to be able to do your job and not worry about our daughters.  I should be able to take care of them.”  </p><p>“Maya, I know you are completely capable of taking care of our daughters,” Carina said softly but firmly, “I have always known that.  And they are happy and growing and hitting all their milestones and proving to me what I knew, but it is not just our daughters who need to be taken care of.  Maya, your well-being is just as important to me as theirs.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, wiping at the tears that refused to stop.  </p><p>“When was the last time you had a shower?” Carina asked, holding Maya close, “Or had something to eat?”</p><p>  “I can’t remember,” Maya said, “On either thing.” </p><p> “Alright,” Carina said calmly, knowing better than to chastise her wife while she was in the middle of a depressive episode, “This is what we are going to do.  I am going to go start a bath and while you are soaking, I am going to go make some food.  Sound good?”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, “Will you… will you take a bath with me?”  Maya knew it was a big ask. </p><p> They hadn’t been intimate at all since the girls were born, Carina struggling with her body image, not even wanting Maya to see her naked, and with everything else going on, Maya hadn’t pushed it.   </p><p>“Ummm,” Carina said, biting her lip.  </p><p>“Never mind,” Maya said, “I know… Yeah, that sounds great.”  </p><p>“Sorry,” Carina said, looking down.  </p><p>“Hey, babe, no,” Maya said, getting Carina to look at her, “I understand that you aren’t comfortable yet and that’s ok.  Take all the time you need.”</p><p>  Carina nodded, getting up and going into the bathroom, starting the tub.  She stood there for a minute, just watching the water fill it.  After looking back into the bedroom at Maya who was just lying in bed, clearly trying to force herself up, she made a choice. </p><p> When the blonde finally found the energy to get out of bed and walk into the bathroom, she was surprised by what she found.  Carina was laying in the tub waiting for her.  </p><p>“Babe, you didn’t have to do that,” Maya said, pulling off her spit up stained shirt.  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, opening her arms to her wife, “But I wanted to.” </p><p> Maya got into the tub, settling against Carina.  The two of them just sat in the tub, Carina washing Maya’s hair and body, just helping the blonde get clean.  They stayed in the tub until the water was cold.  </p><p>After they got out, Maya deciding to brush her teeth before getting back into bed.  When she walked back into the bedroom, she found Carina changing the sheets on the bed.  </p><p>“Thank you,” Maya said as. Her wife patted her side of the bed, telling Maya to lay down.  The blonde got into bed, Carina putting some blankets on top of her.  </p><p>“I am going to go get you some food,” Carina said, “What would you like?”  </p><p>“I don’t know,” Maya shrugged, “I’m not that hungry.”  </p><p>“Si, but you need to eat, bambina,” Carina said, rubbing her back, “I will get you whatever you want.” </p><p> “You chose,” Maya said, burying herself into the blankets.  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina sighed, “I will be back soon.” </p><p> Carina headed downstairs to the kitchen.  </p><p>“Hey,” Vic said from where she was playing on the floor with the twins, “How’s she doing?”  </p><p>“It’s been rough,” Carina said, joining Vic on the floor next to the babies, “She’s having a hard time right now.  She’ll be alright.  How are the girls?”  </p><p>“They have been happy,” Vic said, smiling down at Nora, “We read some books, played with some toys, and now they are just chillin.” </p><p> “Good,” Carina smiled, tickling Rowan a little bit, “I need to grab some food for Maya.  Are you still good to hang out with them?” </p><p>“Yeah,” Vic nodded, “They are pretty great.  So much better than my empty apartment.” </p><p> “Thanks again for playing with them,” Carina said, giving both girls a kiss before getting up.  </p><p>Vic nodded as Carina went into the kitchen, deciding on just some pasta.  She made it quickly from some pasta she had dried earlier that month, boiling it while whipping up a simple sauce Maya loved.  </p><p>“Would you like some pasta?” Carina asked, poking her head into the living room.  “Sure,” Vic nodded, smiling, “Thanks.”  Carina dished up three bowls, handing one to Vic before taking the other two upstairs, finding Maya still awake, but curled up under the covers.  </p><p>“I made pasta,” Carina said, handing Maya the bowl as the blonde sat up, “Eat what you can.”</p><p>  They both ate, Maya only getting through about half her bowl before deciding she was done.  </p><p>“Bambina, when was the last time you slept?” Carina asked as Maya laid back down, “Not just for an hour, but actually slept?” </p><p> “I don’t know,” Maya shrugged, “The babies don’t like to sleep and my insomnia had been really bad.” </p><p> “Why didn’t you take something the last time I was home?” Carina asked, not judgmentally, but concerned.  </p><p>“I wanted to be able to help you when the girls woke up,” Maya said, rubbing her eyes.  </p><p>“You need to sleep, Maya,” Carina said, moving to get up, “I am going to go get you your meds and you are going to get some sleep today while I take care of the twins.”  </p><p>“You must be exhausted too,” Maya said, shaking her head, “You worked all night last night.  I’ll be fine until tonight.”  </p><p>“I actually got quite a bit of rest last night,” Carina said, “And Vic said she can stay until this evening so I am going to feed the babies and put them down and then she can watch then when they wake up.”</p><p>  Maya nodded, not having any desire to get out of bed.  </p><p>“Also,” Carina said, “You need to call Diane and get back into some kind of regular appointment schedule.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, tears filling her eyes, “I have been meaning to, but… I don’t know…”  </p><p>“It’s ok,” Carina said, grabbing Maya’s phone, “Just call now.”  </p><p>Maya took several deep breaths as she stared at her phone.  </p><p>“You can do this,” Carina said, taking one of Maya’s hands, “I am off tomorrow and Tuesday so those would be good days for you to go, but whenever she can fit you in, we will make it work.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, finally pressing send.  It only took a few minutes for her to get an appointment for the following day, letting out a sigh when she hung up.  </p><p>“I’m proud of you, Bella,” Carina said, kissing her cheek.  </p><p>“It was stupid that I stopped going,” Maya said, shaking her head, “I know I need to go, and with all the changes that have been going on in our lives… I should have been better about it.  I’m sorry.” </p><p> “Hey,” Carina said, “None of that.  I stopped too for a while.  Everything just seems so much more complicated now with the babies, like we have no time, but we have to both remember to make time for this because our family will not function if we don’t.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said as Carina got out of bed, coming back a few minutes later with Maya’s sedative medication to help her sleep.  </p><p>“I am going to go feed the babies once you fall asleep,” Carina said, looking at the time, “But for now, I’m right here with you.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, throwing back the pill before laying down, Carina’s arms snaking around to hold her. </p><p> Carina felt her wife’s breathing calm and steady out, indicating she was asleep.  The Italian knew she still had about twenty minutes before the girls needed to be fed so she just laid there with her wife, rubbing her back pressing chaste kisses to her cheeks.  </p><p>She sighed as she thought about how hard the past few months had been for both of them, but thinking about their daughters, she knew she would do it all again to have them, and she was pretty sure Maya would too.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  I know this one was heavy, but I promise the next one will be lighter.  If you have any ideas about what else you would like to see happen with the family, let me know!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0016"><h2>16. Going Out</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>About two weeks after Maya’s episode, she was feeling a little bit better.  Therapy had been helping and the girls finally started sleeping again, and Carina was right, they were now sleeping from 8 pm to 6 am which seemed like a miracle to both moms.  This gave Maya the chance to run either before the babies got up in the morning  or after they went down at night which helped her mental health a lot.  </p><p>Carina also got herself back on a regular day shift which meant that she was there at night to help with the babies if that was needed or to help Maya sleep and allow her to take her meds if she needed to to be able to sleep.  It all helped, and while they still felt like they were adjusting to life with kids, both of them felt like maybe, they had finally turned a corner.  </p><p>Another big plus was that the weather finally had eased a little, meaning Maya could get out of the house with the girls.  </p><p>One morning after the twins were fed and happy, Maya decided to go to the station.  She had some paperwork to drop off and just needed to see her friends.  She got the twins loaded up in their stroller, tucking blankets around them before heading out of the house.  </p><p>She walked to the station, knowing she would make it during shift change because it was just about 7:30.  A shift would probably be getting there around the same time she did, and she was thinking maybe she could steal breakfast with them if the twins were in a good mood. </p><p> She pushed the stroller up to the station, Finch seeing her as she walked up, helping her with the door.  </p><p>“Thanks,” she said as she pushed the double stroller into the station.  </p><p>“Of course Chief,” he said, nodding a little, “Are these your daughters?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya nodded, pulling the sunshades down so the babies could be seen, “This is Nora and this is Rowan.”  </p><p>“They are adorable,” Finch said, smiling at the babies, “Congratulations Chief.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya smiled as he headed upstairs. </p><p> She looked over, seeing Andy’s door was open.  She knocked on the door, Andy’s head popping out of her bunk as she finished buttoning her shirt. </p><p> “Maya,” she said, smiling as her friend pushed the baby stroller into her old office, “What are you doing here?”  </p><p>“I needed to drop off some approved budget forms,” Maya said, shrugging, “And I needed to get out of the house and was hoping maybe to join you all for breakfast?” </p><p> “Of course,” Andy nodded, smiling as she looked at the babies in the stroller, “How are you doing?”  </p><p>“Better,” Maya said, having talked to Andy about everything she was going through almost two weeks ago, but not having talked to her much since, “These munkins have started sleeping through the entire night which has helped, and I feel like maybe I’m starting to adjust to this whole stay at home mom gig.  I’m glad it’s not my life forever, but spending time with them is getting to be more enjoyable.” </p><p> “Good,” Andy said, smiling, “Oh, thanks again for the letter for Robert and me.  I know you had a lot going on so it really means a lot that you did it.”</p><p>  “How is that all going?” Maya asked as Rowan started fussing, clearly over being in her seat.  </p><p>“Can I?” Andy asked, moving toward the baby.  </p><p>“Of course,” Maya nodded as Andy got Rowan out, bouncing her a little, getting a smile out of the baby. </p><p> “It’s going well,” Andy said, “We should be hearing if we are approved sometime in the next two weeks and then, if we are, we will be but in a book for perspective moms and can be chosen from there.” </p><p> “That’s so exciting,” Maya smiled as she watched her friend hold her daughter.  </p><p>Andy nodded, making a face at Rowan before looking at the clock, “Oh, it’s time for breakfast.  Ready?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya nodded, “I need to run to my office first, but I’ll meet you in the beanery in a few minutes.”  </p><p>“Sounds good,” Andy nodded as they got into the elevator, “Do you mind if I take Rowan with me?” </p><p> “Nope,” Maya said, shaking her head.  </p><p>“Actually,” Andy said, suddenly getting a whiff of something bad, “I think she needs to be changed.  Maybe I’ll just let you take her.”  </p><p>Maya laughed, taking the baby from Andy and going to her office while the captain went to the beanery.  Maya put the paperwork where it needed to be, leaving the items for other stations pinned to her bullitain board where she told the other captains they could pick them up.  </p><p>She then changed both babies which she had done before she left the house, but the girls were experts at dirtying diapers almost as soon as they were on these days.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, attempting to put both girls back in the stroller, only to get yelled at by both babies, “Fine.  I’m sure you two are about to get passed around anyway.”  </p><p>Maya walked down the hall and into the beanery.  </p><p>“Chief,” Montogmery said, looking up and seeing her.  </p><p>“Lieutenant,” Maya said, smiling, “Congratulations on your promotion.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Travis said.  </p><p>The A shift had had a lot of shake ups in the past few months with Jack’s transfer out after Miller’s promotion, followed by Maya and Andy’s promotions and most recently, Travis taking a lieutenant position.  They also had a new probie who had been at the station for almost five months.  </p><p>“Babies,” Vic said, getting up and going over to Maya, “Can I have one, please please please please please?” </p><p> “They’re not puppies,” Maya laughing as she handed Rowan to Vic.  </p><p>Ben also walked over and Maya handed him Nora.  They all sat down at the table, Maya enjoying some time with her friends as her daughters were passed from person to person.  </p><p>“Man, I forgot how tiny babies are,” Miller said, shaking his head as he looked at Nora in her arms, “It seems like just yesterday, Pruitt was this size and now she’s in kindergarten.”  </p><p>“Yeah, I like her better in kindergarten,” Vic said, looking at him, “I mean, no offense to these munkins, but I think I like kids better when they talk and use a toilet and actually sleep.”  </p><p>“They sleep,” Maya said, wiping a little drool off Rowan’s chin as Travis held her, “They have slept the entire night every night for the past week.” </p><p> “Wow,” Andy said, looking at her with a grin, “So they clearly do not take after you in the sleep department.”  </p><p>“No they do no,” Maya said, “Thank goodness.  I was a little worried for a while, but I think they will be more like Carina in that reguard.”  </p><p>Maya’s sleep issues were well known at the station.  Everyone knew the blonde never slept on shift and struggled to sleep off shift too.  Only Andy and Vic actually knew how bad her insomnia really was and how it impacted her, but Maya was ok enough with her sleep issues to joke with everyone about it.  </p><p>About forty minutes later, the girls were getting fussy.  </p><p>“They’re hungry,” Maya said, “I have bottles in my office.  I’ll be right back.” </p><p> Maya went into the office, grabbig the two bottles of milk out of the bag.  When she got back, she found Andy already had a pot of water boiling to heat them up.  Rowan was wailing Sullivan’s arms.  </p><p>“I can take her,” Maya offered, going over to him.  He handed her the red faced baby.  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, bouncing her a little as she went into the kitchen where Andy handed her a bottle, taking the other one to the table, handing it to Travis who was holding Nora.  </p><p>“Oh, no,” he said, handing both the bottle and the baby to Andy, “I don’t know how to feed babies.”  </p><p>“Fine,” Andy said, popping the bottle in Nora’s mouth. </p><p> Rowan fought her bottle for a minute before taking it and settling into Maya’s arms.  The blonde then went back over to the table, sitting back down.  </p><p>Before they would continue talking, however, the alarm started, calling for the aid car.  Ben and Miller got up, saying a quick goodbye to Maya before heading down to the barn.  The noise scared Nora, causing the little girl to start crying.  </p><p>“Shh,” Andy cooed, trying to calm her back down.</p><p>  Once the station was quiet again, Nora settled.</p><p> “They really are so different,” Vic said, shaking her head, Rowan not bothered at all by the noise.  </p><p>“And as they get older, it just gets more and more apparent,” Maya nodded, burping Rowan.  Once the girls finished eating, they both passed out. </p><p> “Alright,” Andy said, “You’ve all had an easy start of shift and I’m going to skip line up this morning.   Go get to work on chores.”  </p><p>“But babies,” Vic said, looking over at Nora who was sleeping in Andy’s arms.  </p><p>“If you want to see the babies, you can come over on your day off,” Maya offered as everyone got up, “We are home most of the time.”</p><p>  “Fine,” Vic grumbled, “It was good to see you.”  </p><p>“You all too,” Maya said as everyone said good bye and headed downstairs for chores.  </p><p>“I need to get back to work too,” Andy sighed, looking down at the sleeping baby in her arms, “I don’t want to put her down though.”  </p><p>“I probably should get going anyways,” Maya said, “If the alarm goes off again, they will not stay asleep.”  </p><p>“True,” Andy nodded, getting up as Maya grabbed the bottles, heading back to the Battalion Chief’s office.  </p><p>Maya and Andy carefully set the babies in the stroller, Maya tucking blankets around them before pulling the sun shades down.  </p><p>“Thanks for stopping by,” Andy said as they headed to the elevators. </p><p> “I needed to get out of the house,” Maya said.  </p><p>“Well, maybe you should make this a regular thing,” Andy said, “I know the team would like it.  They will happily take the occasional easy morning.” </p><p> “Maybe I will,” Maya nodded, smiling at her friend, “Well, I’m gonna get these two home.  Have a good shift.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Andy nodded as Maya pushed the stroller out.  </p><p>Just as Maya started walking away from the station, she heard the faint sound of the alarm, smiling as she watched her old team haul out of the station quickly.  </p><p>Maya watched as the trucks disappeared down the street, half wishing she was going with them. However, she shook the idea from her head, instead heading home to do some laundry before the twins woke up.  </p><p> </p><p>Later that month, Carina was at work when Maya got a text from Teddy asking what she was up to.  Maya texted her back, saying she was just hanging out with the girls, wondering why the cardiothorasic surgeon needed to know.  Teddy then texted, letting her know that Carina had lost a mom and baby about an hour ago and that she was having a hard time with it, having shut herself in her office.  Maya texted her back, saying she would be there soon.  </p><p>She quickly packed the diaper bag, changing both babies’ diapers before putting them in their stroller.  It was almost time to feed them, but she knew that could be done at the hospital.  She covered the babies up in blankets before jogging to the hospital.  </p><p>Once she was there, she headed immediately to the elevators.  Amelia walked up next to her just as she did so.  </p><p>“Hey,” the neurosurgeon said, “What are you doing here?” </p><p> “Carina lost a patient,” Maya said, shifting back and forth, anxious to get up to Carina, “Teddy texted and said she’s taking it pretty hard.”  </p><p>“Damn,” Amelia said, shaking her head, “I’ve been in the OR all day.  Let me know if there’s anything I can do.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya nodded as they stepped into the elevator.</p><p>  As they waited for it to go up, Maya look the sunshades down from the babies, Amelia smiling at them.  </p><p>“Man, I feel like they are bigger than when we were over on Saturday,” the dark haired woman said, shaking her head.  </p><p>“They are growing really fast,” Maya agreed, smiling as Nora looked up at Amelia, giving her a big smile, “And Harper is too.  She’s going to be walking before long.”  </p><p>“Don’t remind me,” Amelia said, shaking her head, “I feel like Scout was just this size and now he’s about to start preschool.”  </p><p>“Well, this is me,” Maya said, getting off the elevator, “See you later Amelia.”  </p><p>“Yeah,” she nodded, “And like I said, anything at all, let me know.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, pushing the twins stroller down the hall to her wife’s office, knocking gently on the door.   </p><p>“Carina,” she called, trying the handle and finding the door locked, “Hey, it’s me.  Can I come in?”  </p><p>Maya heard a shuffling and a minute later, the door unlocked and Carina pulled it open, looking at Maya with her tearstained face.  </p><p>“Oh, babe,” Maya said, coming into the office with the babies, Carina shutting the door behind her, “Come here.”  </p><p>Carina was instantly in Maya’s arms, sitting on the couch as she cried.  </p><p>“I should have been able to save her,” Carina sobbed, “And the baby.  I should have been able to… And now her husband has to raise their one year old alone… It’s not fair.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, rubbing Carina’s back, “I know.  It never is when someone dies.  But I know you did everything you could.”  </p><p>Carina had lost her first patients during the pandemic, where people were dying constantly which took a heavy toll on everyone.  However, since then, the brunette had only lost one mom before today, and this was the first patient she lost since coming back from maternity leave which was making this so much harder.  </p><p>They could have sat there longer, but Rowan started fussing.  </p><p>“They need to eat,” Maya said, looking at the time, “I brought bottles.”  </p><p>“I can nurse Rowan,” Carina said, wiping her eyes and nose as Maya got up, “It will save me from having to pump one side.”  </p><p>Maya grabbed a bottle of pre-pumped milk for Nora, hoping the baby would take it not warmed up.  They sat down on the couch, Carina feeding Rowan while pumping on the other side as Maya gave Nora her bottle.  </p><p>“God, I can’t believe another family is not going to get to do this,” Carina said, tears welling up in her eyes as she looked at Rowan, “That dad will never get to feed his son and their little girl is going to grow up without a mom and brother because I wasn’t fast enough…”  </p><p>“Babe,” Maya said, wrapping one arm around her wife, “There was nothing you could have done.  Teddy told me the woman came in with abdominal pain and had a ruptured uterus.  You did everything you could.”  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, “But still…”  </p><p>“Babe, but nothing,” Maya said, shaking her head, “There was nothing you could have done to save her.  And it is alright to be sad that your patient died, but you cannot beat yourself up over it.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, brushing tears from her eyes.  Just as Carina finished feeding Rowan, her pager went off.  </p><p>“I have a mom who is close to delivering,” Carina sighed, taking off her pump, “Thank you for coming by.  It was good to see you and the girls.  I needed it today.”  </p><p>“Of course,” Maya nodded, giving her a kiss as she took Rowan.  </p><p>Carina grabbed her coat, heading to the delivery room.  It was currently around 10 am, and Maya knew the girls were about to fall asleep for close to an hour so she decided to hang out in Carina’s office for a while and then go grab lunch for her wife, knowing on days like this, she forgot to eat.  </p><p>Maya laid both babies down in the stroller, deciding to walk them around the hospital a little to get them to go to sleep. It didn’t take much, and before long, both girls were passed out in the stroller.  </p><p>The blonde then headed back to her wife’s office, running into Bailey on her way.  </p><p>“What are you doing here Bishop?” she asked, confused.  </p><p>“The girls and I came to visit Carina,”  Maya said, “She’s having a rough shift, and I thought she could use some company.”  </p><p>“Oh,” Bailey said, nodding, “I heard she lost a patient right at the start of her shift today.  Is she alright?”  </p><p>“She will be,” Maya nodded.  </p><p>“How are the babies doing?” Miranda asked, looking in the stroller and seeing both of them sleeping, “They are getting so big.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya said, “They’ll be five months old tomorrow.”  </p><p>“How are you holding up on maternity leave?” Bailey asked, raising an eyebrow at the blonde, knowing they were very similar when it came to work.  </p><p>“It’s been… interesting,” Maya said, shrugging, “I mean, I love them, but I also cannot wait to get back to my job.  I feel kinda bad saying it though.”  </p><p>“I was the same way when I had Tuck,” Bailey nodded, “It was like torture being away.  It didn’t mean I loved him any less, and just because you can’t wait to get back doesn’t mean you love them any less.  Working makes me a better mom, and I’m sure it’s the same for you.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, knowing she and Miranda were a lot alike.  </p><p>“Well, we are going to go hang out in Carina’s office while she delivers a baby and these two nap,” Maya said, “See you later.”  </p><p>“Maybe I’ll stop by later and steal some baby time,” Bailey said, stealing one more peak at the sleeping twins.  </p><p>Maya smiled as she went into the office, making sure the girls were still sleeping before sitting down on the couch.  She listened to some music softly, just enjoying some time to herself.  About an hour later, Nora started to stir, letting out a little cry as her eyes opened.  </p><p>“Hey Nora,” Maya said, picking her up, “Did you have a good nap?”  </p><p>Nora smiled as she looked at her mommy, cooing a little.  </p><p>“Once your sister wakes up, we are going to go get some lunch for Momma,” Maya said, pulling her hair out of Nora’s grasp.  </p><p>Nora put her two fingers in her mouth, just cuddling close.  Ten minutes later, Rowan woke up too.  Maya cuddled with both of them on the couch for a little while before getting ready to put them back in the stroller to go get lunch for Carina when there was a knock on the office door.  </p><p>“Hey, I heard about the mom from this morning and just wanted to…” Andrew said, coming in before stopping short, “You’re not Carina.”  </p><p>“I am not,” Maya nodded, smiling as Andrew came over to the couch, “She’s delivering a baby.  The girls and I just stopped by to cheer her up, and then I was going to take them to grab her some lunch.”  </p><p>“Carina is so lucky to have you three,” Andrew said, smiling at Rowan who was blowing bubbles in the stroller, “I’ll stop by later and check on her.”  </p><p>Maya was about to offer for Andrew to join them for lunch when his pager went off. </p><p> “Incoming trauma,” he said, “I’ll see you guys later.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, finishing getting the babies strapped in, heading out the door.  She went to one of their favorite delis near the hospital, getting soup and sandwhiches before going back to the hospital, finding her wife back in her office.  </p><p>“What are you doing back?” Carina asked, confused as her family walked in the door.  </p><p>“We just ran to grab you lunch,” Maya said, “I know you are bad at eating when you’re working so I thought this might help, and some extra cuddles with the girls would probably be good too.”  </p><p>“I love you,” Carina said, tears welling up in her eyes as she walked over to her wife, kissing her deeply.  </p><p>“I love you too,” Maya said, smiling at her.  Just then, Nora yelled, causing both moms to look down at her.  </p><p>“I think she’s saying she loves you too,” Maya laughed as Carina bent down, picking the baby up.  </p><p>“Ti amo tanto, Piccola,” Carina said, kissing the baby’s head as Maya scooped up Rowan.  </p><p>The family sat on the couch, the moms eating while the girls sat on their laps, gurgling away.  After the twins next feeding, Maya loaded them back up to go home.  </p><p>“I’ll see you tonight,” Maya said, kissing her wife.  </p><p>“Thank you for coming,” Carina said, wrapping her arms around the blonde, “I didn’t know how much I needed to see you all today.”  </p><p>“We will always come,” Maya said, pressing her forehead to Carina’s, “Have a good rest of your shift.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, giving both babies a kiss before walking them out.  </p><p>“Bye,” Maya called as she and the twins headed home.  </p><p>Carina waved as she watched them leave, grateful that, especially on days like today, she had such an amazing family to lean on.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  A little happier and lighter than the past few chapters.  Let me know if you have any ideas for this story, or anything else you'd like me to write.  I have 2 more weeks left of my classes and then I'm done with school until I officially start grad school in August so hopefully I'll have more time to write.  Anyway, thanks for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0017"><h2>17. Shots</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Taking Rowan and Nora to the doctor was a two man job, at least when they had to get vaccines.  Neither girl enjoyed getting poked with multiple needles, obviously, and it usually required each of them to hold a crying baby.  After their two and four month shots, both girls were fussy the rest of the day, but nothing more.  </p><p>However, both moms knew that 6 months meant a lot of shots.   They had purposely planned their appointment on a day that Carina was off the entire day so she could help out, just in case, and made the appointment for the week before Maya headed back to work.  </p><p>They got the girls checked, Rowan weighing 16 lbs. 10 oz. and Nora 15 lbs. 13 oz.  At birth, Ro had been smaller, but that girl loved food more than just about anything.  Nora was much less interested in eating than her sister, but both of them were healthy, on the small side for their age, but healthy all the same.  </p><p>The doctor gave them a thorough check before declaring both of them perfect.  Then came the part both moms knew was necessary, but it didn’t make it any less hard. </p><p> They found that feeding the girls during their vaccinations made it a little easier, so Carina was going to nurse Rowan while Maya fed Nora a bottle in order to try to keep them both semi calm.  They got lucky and two nurses were available to do the vaccines, meaning they could get this over quickly.  </p><p>As soon as the first needle pierced Nora’s skin, she spit the bottle out, screaming.  Rowan did the same thing and after the five shots each, both babies were beyond pissed and both moms were desperate to calm them down.  </p><p>Luckily, both girls decided they were hungry enough to be soothed by food, taking milk after a few minutes.  Once they had eaten, they both fell asleep quickly. </p><p> “I wish there was some way to give them these vaccines without the pain,” Maya said as she secured Nora in her car seat.  </p><p>“Me too,” Carina said, nodding, “I hate when they are hurting.”  </p><p>They drove home and after they carefully transferred the girls into their cribs, Maya and Carina went downstairs.  Carina had charts to catch up on and Maya some budget reports to approve for her stations, something that couldn’t wait until she was back the following week.  </p><p>About an hour later, they heard crying over the baby monitor, Maya running upstairs to get the girls so Carina could finish her charts.  </p><p>“Good morning Patatina,” Maya said, scooping up Rowan, who was always mad when she woke up, “Let’s get you a fresh diaper.”  </p><p>Once Rowan was changed, Maya put her back in her crib with a toy for a minute so she could change Nora who was always much more chill when she woke up, often just laying in her bed, sucking on her fingers quietly. </p><p> Once both girls had fresh diapers, Maya carried them downstairs. </p><p> “Bonjorno bambinas,” Carina said, smiling as Maya walked into the room with the girls, “Did you have good sleep?”  </p><p>The four of them spent the next hour hanging out on the floor, the twins playing and cooing, Rowan up on her hands and knees, clearly thinking about crawling.  Then, they took the girls out for a walk, each of them opting to wear the girls in carriers because it was a chillier day. </p><p> By the time they got back, it was time to feed them again and after that and a little more play time, both babies were grumpy and tired.  The next time the twins woke up, it was obvious their shots were starting to bother them.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, picking Rowan up as soon as she walked into the nursery, “Oh, Ro, you feel warm.  Are you not feeling good, Patatina?”  </p><p>The baby just let out a whimper, burying her face in Maya’s neck.  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, bouncing her a little, “Let’s check on your sister and then we will get you feeling better.”  Nora was still asleep so Maya ducked out of the bedroom.  </p><p>“Car,” Maya called downstairs, “Can you come up here?” </p><p> Within a minute, the Italian was upstairs.  </p><p>“What’s wrong?” she asked, voice full of concern.  </p><p>“I think Rowan has a fever,” Maya said, turning so Carina could see the baby.  </p><p>“Oh, poor Ro,” Carina said, putting a hand on the baby’s head, feeling the warmth, “It’s probably just from the vaccines.  She will be ok.”  </p><p>“Should I give her a bath or something?” Maya asked, rubbing Rowan’s back.  </p><p>“Maybe later,” Carina said, “For now, we can just take her downstairs with us and hold her.”</p><p> Just then, they heard a soft cry from the nursery, Carina going in and picking up Nora.  </p><p>“Looks like we are two for two on the fevers,” Carina said, carrying Nora out of the bedroom.  </p><p>“Let’s take them downstairs and try to keep them comfortable,” Maya sighed, rubbing Rowan’s back as the baby fussed.  </p><p>It was time for the girls to eat, but Rowan basically refused, crying after her first few sucks, pushing away.  </p><p>“It’s ok Ro Ro,” Maya said, taking the baby while Carina went to get her pump, “Are you not feeling good?” </p><p> Rowan just cried, snuggling closer to Maya as the blonde juggled feeding Nora and holding Rowan.  Just as Carina came back with her pump, Rowan let out a burp, throwing up all over Maya’s neck and back.  </p><p>“Oh, Rowan” Maya said, wincing as she felt it, the baby crying more, “It’s ok.”  </p><p>“That explains her not wanting to eat,” Carina frowned, “She’s probably got an upset stomach from the shots.  Let me have Nora.  Go take her up for a shower.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, handing Nora off before standing up, taking Rowan upstairs.  The little girl was clearly not feeling good, throwing up on Maya again in she shower.  </p><p>“Ok,” Maya said, letting the water run over them, “It’s gonna be ok.  Upset stomachs are the worst, but you’ll feel better soon.”  </p><p>Rowan settled down after her second time getting sick, just laying on Maya’s chest.  Maya just held her in the shower for a little while before getting them both out, dressing Rowan in a loose onesie before grabbing a blanket to put over her, not wanting to overheat her.  She also noticed that the places she had gotten she shots were red, swollen, and a little hot to the touch, and when she touched them, Rowan whined.  </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Maya said, laying Rowan down on the master bed, pulling on some sweatpants and a sports bra, deciding that no shirt was probably best for the evening.  </p><p>She then scooped Rowan up, rocking her in her arms a little.  The sick baby was basically asleep on Maya by the time they got downstairs, another sign she wasn’t feeling well.  </p><p>“She got sick again in the shower,” Maya said, sitting down next to where Carina was taking off her breast pump, Nora laying on the couch next to her, “She seems pretty miserable.”  </p><p>“Nora ate her entire feed,” Carina said, setting the pumped milk on the table, “But she doesn’t seem like herself either.”  </p><p>Just then, Nora pulled her legs up to her chest, starting to cry. </p><p> “What’s wrong?” Carina asked, picking up the baby, “Are you not feeling good either?”  </p><p>Nora just kept crying, rubbing her face on Carina’s shoulder. </p><p>“Shhh,” Carina said gently, rubbing her back before smelling something bad, “Oh, I think I might know what’s wrong.”  </p><p>Carina took Nora off her shoulder, going to change her diaper and finding that she also clearly had an upset tummy.  As Carina took the diaper off, Nora pooped all over the changing mat, crying as she did so.  </p><p>“It’s ok,” Carina said, grabbing wipes, “Lo so.  Non ti senti bene.  Mamma e qui.”  </p><p>Carina got Nora cleaned up, pulling off her clothes before bringing the crying baby to Maya.  </p><p>“She made a mess of the changing pad,” Carina said, grabbing a blanket from the basket under the table, putting it over Nora, “I need to go clean it up.”  </p><p>“Poor Piccola,” Maya said, settling the baby against her, “Are you feeling sick too?”  </p><p>Nora whimpered a little, sticking her fingers in her mouth.  Maya looked down at her two sick daughters, pressing kisses onto each of their heads which were too warm.  </p><p>“Should we give them something for the fevers?” Maya asked as Carina came back into the room, following Maya’s lead and pulling off her shirt before taking Rowan.  </p><p>“Maybe,” Carina said, settling Rowan against her, the little girl not waking up thankfully, “They’re sleeping now though, so maybe we wait.  If they seem uncomfortable, we can give them something.”  </p><p> “I hate that they are feeling bad,” Maya said, rubbing Nora’s back as the baby shifted against her.  </p><p>“Me too,” Carina nodded, “But I would rather have them feel a little sick for a day or two than have them catch what the vaccines are protecting them against.” </p><p> “Me too,” Maya agreed. </p><p> They spent the rest of the evening trying to keep the girls comfortable.  Rowan, luckily, ate her evening feed and kept most of it down.  Nora ate about half of hers as well.  </p><p>The night was rough.  Both girls were clearly exhausted but uncomfortable.  They would manage to get one of them to sleep only to have the other one wake up within twenty minutes.  They gave them some tylonal which seemed to help for about three hours, but then they were both up again. </p><p>“Maybe I should call in today,” Carina said as her alarm went off at 6 am for work, both of them still awake.  </p><p>“If you are too tired, yes,” Maya said, nodding, “But I’ve got the girls today if that’s what you are worried about.  They will be fine.  Hopefully, they will start to feel a little better and get some sleep.”  </p><p>“Are you sure?” Carina asked, biting her lip.  </p><p>“I am sure, babe,” Maya said, leaning over, careful not to disturb Nora who was asleep on her chest, “We will be fine.  I will send you hourly updates if that will help.”</p><p> “Really?” Carina said, looking at Maya.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, nodding, “Of course.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Carina said, eyes filling with tears, “I only work an 8 hour shift today so I should be home this afternoon, but I can come home sooner if you need me.”  </p><p>“We will be ok,” Maya said, smiling at her, “Now go or you’re going to be late.”  </p><p>Carina got out of bed, knowing Maya was right.  Before she left, Rowan was awake and fussy even in Maya’s arms, a place she was normally calm.  </p><p>“We will be fine,” Maya said, giving Carina a kiss, “Now go so you can come back.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, leaning down and kissing Rowan’s warm forehead. </p><p>“Spero che tu guarisca Patatina,” Carina whispered, rubbing Rowan’s back, “Toreno presto.  Ti voglio bene.” </p><p>The baby sighed, rubbing her face on Maya.  </p><p>“Love you,” Maya said, giving her a kiss.  </p><p>“Love you too,” Carina said, smiling, “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”  </p><p>“We will be fine,” Maya said, nodding as Carina left.  </p><p>Once Carina was gone, Maya took Rowan downstairs, starting a pot of coffee.  Just as the coffee finished, she heard a cry from upstairs. She went up, finding Nora awake and mad.  </p><p>“I’m right here,” Maya said, picking her up, rubbing her back.  </p><p>Just then, Nora threw up all over Maya’s back.  </p><p>“Ok,” Maya said with a sigh, “It’s ok.”  </p><p>She set Rowan down, the little girl too tired to be mad, just whimpering a little.  As Maya moved Nora, the baby threw up again, this time all over the front of Maya’s shirt.  </p><p>“Oh, Piccola,” Maya frowned as the baby cried, “I’m sorry you feel so bad.  It’s gonna be ok.”  </p><p>Maya set Nora down for a second to pull off her shirt before picking the baby back up.  </p><p>“Mommy is right here,” Maya said as Nora whimpered, clearly not feeling well, “It’s going to be ok.”  </p><p>Nora’s tummy seemed to be calmed down, at least for now, so Maya went back to pick up Rowan, finding the blonde haired little girl sound asleep.  Maya smiled, leaving Rowan for a minute, carrying Nora downstairs, pouring herself a cup of coffee.  Nora fell asleep on Maya quickly, fingers in her bmouth while her other hand grasped Maya’s bra strap.  </p><p>Maya went back up to the nursery, deciding that she wanted to be close if and when Rowan needed her.  She rocked in the chair, shooting Carina a text, updating her on how the girls were before seeing she had a message from Andy, asking if she and the girls wanted to join her and Luca at the park.  Maya snapped a picture of the sleeping baby on her chest, telling Andy the girls had just had their shots and were not feeling well, but maybe later in the week.  The captain texted her back quickly, saying she hoped the girls felt better soon and asking if they needed anything.  </p><p>Maya was about to respond when Rowan started crying again.  Maya went over to the crib, picking her up before settling in the chair with both girls.  The rest of the morning was rough as both babies dealt with upset stomach and fevers, but around noon, they both took their bottles and then fell asleep with Maya in the master bed.  </p><p>Maya didn’t have the heart to move them to their cribs so she just sat there with them on her chest, texting Carina a picture along with an update before putting on a podcast, just relaxing.  </p><p>She must have nodded off because she woke up when she felt movement on her chest.  The next thing she felt was that she was wet and her eyes flew open, worried someone had gotten sick again.  </p><p>However, when she looked at the girls, she noticed Nora’s hair was damp and Rowan’s onesie was as well.  She put her hands on their foreheads, smiling when she felt how cool they were.  </p><p>“Good morning bambinas,” Maya smiled, “Are you both feeling better?”  </p><p>Nora gurgled, smiling at Maya.  </p><p>“You both need a bath,” Maya said, “Apparently, you are both just like me, sweating out those nasty fevers.”  </p><p>Rowan looked up at her, wrinkling her nose. </p><p> “Alright,” Maya said, laying them both down in the middle of the bed surrounded by pillows and each other, “Let me go get the bath ready.”  </p><p>The blonde quickly got the baby bath set up, grabbing a bouncy seat to put in the bathroom to keep an eye on whoever wasn’t in the bath.  She then gathered up the babies, sticking Rowan in the bouncy seat and Nora in the tub.  </p><p>She got them both cleaned up pretty quickly, dressing them in comfy outfits before taking them downstairs to play.  Nora was all about the play mat this afternoon, but Rowan was still on the fussy side, not wanting Maya to set her down.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya conceded, “I will hold you.”  </p><p>About twenty minutes later, Maya heard a knock at the door.  She was confused, but went to answer it.  </p><p>“Andy?” she said, looking at her friend, “What are you doing here?”  </p><p>“Well, you said the girls weren’t feeling well,” she said, “And I asked if you needed anything and you didn’t answer, but I figured it’s always nice to not have to worry about food for you when they aren’t feeling well so I made some tortilla soup and cookies.” </p><p> “Thanks,” Maya said, smiling at Andy, “Do you want to come in?”  </p><p>“Are you sure?” Andy asked, “It looks like you’ve had a rough day.  You aren’t even wearing a shirt.”  </p><p>“Oh,” Maya said, looking down, “Yeah.  They were a mess this morning and Nora threw up on me, but their fevers broke like an hour ago.  I just forgot to get redressed.”  </p><p>“You are such a mom,” Andy laughed, coming into the house, “So they’re feeling better?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, “At least I think so.  Nora is back to her happy self.  This one, however, is still a little grumpy.”  </p><p>“Are you still feeling bad?” Andy asked, looking at Rowan. </p><p> The baby rubbed her eyes, cuddling closer to Maya.  </p><p>“Want to see Nora?” Maya asked, holding Rowan close.  </p><p>“Sure,” Andy said, nodding.  </p><p>The two of them chatted for a little bit, Andy playing with Nora and filling Maya in on everything at the station.  It was nearing 3 when Andy left and Maya knew Carina would be home soon. </p><p> Rowan was still having a hard time getting comfortable and refused to let Maya set her down, which was fine.  Nora eventually got tired of being on the floor and Maya ended up on the couch with both of them, just talking to them about firefighting. </p><p> That’s how Carina found them when she got home.  </p><p>“How are they feeling?” she asked, coming into the room, earning a big smile from Nora and a smaller one from Rowan.  </p><p>“Better,” Maya said, Carina taking Nora, “Ro is still not quite herself, but Nora is much happier after her exorcist routine this morning.”</p><p>  “Poor baby,” Carina said, kissing Nora’s cheek, “I am glad you are feeling better.”  </p><p>Nora smiled at her again.  </p><p>“How are you?” Carina asked, looking at Maya who was still lacking a shirt and looked like she had been through hell.  </p><p>“I’m fine,” Maya shrugged, “Exhasuted, but fine.  And I learned today that the girls take after me when they have fevers.”  </p><p>“They pretend they do not until they almost pass out?” Carina questioned, raising an eyebrow.  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, rolling her eyes, “They sweat buckets when they break them.  They both woke up from their last naps drenched.”  </p><p>“Great,” Carina said sarcastically, “Now when you all get sick, we are going to have three wet beds.” </p><p> “Hopefully that is a rare occurrence,” Maya said, shaking her head, “How was work?”  </p><p>“Work was fine,” Carina said, “I would have rather been home with you three, though.”  </p><p>“You were smart to go to work,” Maya said, “Most of the day was filled with puke and diarrhea and crying.  Now, you get to have happy babies.”  </p><p>Carina smiled as she went to pick up Rowan, the little girl’s lip trembling as she started to cry.  </p><p>“Oh Patatina,” Carina frowned, “What’s wrong?”  </p><p>“She has been grumpy all day,” Maya said, “I still think she’s feeling bad.” </p><p> Just then, Rowan threw up again, this tim all over Carina.  </p><p>“Oh Rowan,” Carina said, just holding the baby close, “Your poor tummy.” </p><p> “Go take a shower with her,” Maya said, “It really helped yesterday.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, heading upstairs.  </p><p>“You are getting yourself an awful lot of showers these days Patatina,” Carina said, stepping under the spray with the baby.  </p><p>Meanwhile, downstairs, all of a sudden, Nora started crying too.  </p><p>“What?” Maya said, adjusting her position, “Are you getting hungry?”  </p><p>Nora just kept crying, suddenly passing terrible gas.  </p><p>“Oh, is your tummy still hurting too?” Maya asked, moving Nora so she could rub her belly.</p><p>  Soon enough, Nora needed a diaper change.  However, once she had a fresh diaper, she seemed to be feeling fine again.  </p><p>“Upset tummies are the worst, huh Nora?” Maya said, making a face at her, getting a laugh out of the baby, “But I’m glad you are feeling better.”  </p><p>Nora batted at Maya’s face with her hands, smiling at her.   Once Carina was done in the shower, they fed both girls without incident before putting them down for another nap.  </p><p>“Their sleep schedule is going to be a mess,” Maya said, shaking her head as she looked at the clock.  </p><p>“Maybe not,” Carina said as they sat down on the couch together, “They both slept poorly last night so maybe tonight, they will make up for it.”  </p><p>“Hopefully,” Maya nodded as they turned on the TV. </p><p> The rest of the evening went smoothly.  Both girls were clearly happier when they woke up from their nap, and while they still had some terrible diapers, they were pretty much back to their normal selves.  </p><p>“I’m so glad they are feeling better,” Maya said as they tiredly climbed into bed, “I hate seeing them feeling bad.”  </p><p>“Me too,” Carina nodded, shaking her head, “Hopefully though, those shots will help minimize anything too bad.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, wrapping her arms around Carina as they both fell asleep quickly, hoping that tonight went better than the last.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you liked it! If you are against vaccines, I don't care to hear it.  I chose to believe in science.  Anyway, if you have any ideas for this little family, let me know.  I have chapters about the girls first day at daycare, a date night, and an exciting family vacation already in the works, but other than that, I could use some ideas! Thanks so much for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0018"><h2>18. Daycare</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Alright,” Maya said, pulling a clean onesie onto Rowan, “Now, if you could just not spit up again before daycare, that would be great.  You want to make a good first impression on everyone on your first day, and spit up covered clothes is not going to cut it.”  </p><p>Rowan babbled, blowing spit bubbled at Maya as she pulled her up.  </p><p>“Come on,” Maya said, “Let’s go try to calm Mamma down.”  </p><p>The two blondes headed downstairs where Carina was going over her list for the fifth time that morning.  </p><p>“Babe, we have everything they need,” Maya said, putting her hand on Carina’s back, “And probably more.”  </p><p>“Did we remember…” Carina started.  </p><p>“Nora’s favorite blanket, yep.  It’s in her bag,” Maya nodded, setting Rowan down on the play mat so she could properly calm her wife down, “They are going to be fine.  And if we forgot anything, I can always run it to the hospital when I have a free minute.  The girls are going to be fine.  They are literally going to be in the same building with you.  It is going to be fine.” </p><p> “But what if they get hurt or something by a bigger kid?” Carina asked, biting her lip.  </p><p>“They are going to be watched all the time,” Maya said, “And Scout is almost as protective of the girls as he is of Harper so they have a mini bodyguard.  Everything is going to be fine.”</p><p>  “How can you be so calm about this?” Carina said, pacing the kitchen, “We are about to go leave our daughters with virtual strangers.”  </p><p>“I would hardly call them strangers,” Maya said, shaking her head, “Five of them are patients of yours.  Now, we need to get going because I have a meeting at 42 this morning that I cannot be late for, and I would like to be able to be there when we drop them off.” </p><p> “Fine,” Carina sighed, going to grab the babies as Maya loaded the car with the babies’ bags as well as hers and Carina’s. </p><p> Soon enough, the four of them were heading to Grey Sloan.  </p><p>“I don’t think they’re ready,” Carina said as they walked into the hospital, each of them holding a baby.  </p><p>“They are ready,” Maya nodded, “This will be good for them.  It will teach them how to make friends.  And it’s only for like 5 hours today because you are only working a half day so it will be fine.”  </p><p>“But what if…” Carina started, but Maya stopped her.  </p><p>“Babe, they are going to be fine.  They are safe here.”  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, taking a deep breath as they walked up to the day care.  </p><p>“Dr. Deluca,” Tammy, one of the daycare workers said, “And Chief Bishop.  Good morning.  And good morning Rowan and Nora?”  </p><p>“Correct,” Maya nodded as Tammy pointed to each of the girls, making sure she had the right name with the right baby, “And you can call me Maya.  We brought their bags, and a copy of what they eat and when they normally nap and stuff like that.”  </p><p>“Perfect,” Tammy said, gesturing for Maya and Carina to come in, “Every kid has a cubby we keep their stuff in.  Here is Nora’s, and this one is for Rowan.  You are welcome to leave stuff here if you want to, like extra clothes, bottles, whatever just in case.” </p><p> “Thank you,” Carina said, putting down one of the baby bags.  </p><p>They had been here about a week ago just to check it all out so they were familiar with everything.  </p><p>“Alright,” Tammy said, “Any questions?”  </p><p>“I don’t think so,” Maya said, shaking her head.  </p><p>“If there is a problem, you will page me?” Carina asked, rubbing her hand up and down Rowan’s back.  </p><p>“We will,” Tammy said, “And we can call you too Maya.” </p><p>“Thank you,”  the blonde said, smiling, “That would be great.  Car, they are going to be fine.”  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, hugging Rowan tightly, “I just worry.”  </p><p>“And that is perfectly normal,” Tammy said, nodding, “I promise, they are in good hands here.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, wiping a tear from her eye as she kissed Rowan, Maya doing the same to Nora, before they both leaned over and kissed the other baby.  </p><p>“I should be off around 1 today,” Carina said, “I will pick them up.” </p><p> “Sounds good,” Tammy said, holding out her hands. </p><p> Both moms handed the babies to Tammy, Rowan instantly starting to fuss. </p><p> “They will be just fine,” Tammy said, walking toward the daycare playroom, “I promise.”  </p><p>Maya took Carina’s hand as the brunette bit her lip, trying not to run and take the baby back. </p><p> “Come on,” Maya said, pulling Carina out of the daycare.  </p><p>“That was so hard,” Carina said, trying not to cry as she looked over at Maya, seeing the tears running down her face, “Oh, Bambina.”  </p><p>“It’s fine,” Maya said, wiping furiously at her face, “I know.  They’ll be fine.  I don’t know why I’m so emotional.”  </p><p>“This is a big step,” Carina said, wrapping her arms around Maya’s shoulders.  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, nodding before looking at her watch, “Damn it.  I need to leave like five minutes ago.  I love you.”  </p><p>“Love you too,” Carina said, pressing a quick kiss to Maya’s lips, “Be safe.”   </p><p>“I should be home for dinner tonight,” Maya called as she left.</p><p>The blonde had been back at work for about a week, but this was the first time she and Carina were working at the same time since she went back.  </p><p>As she drove across town, Maya mind was running at about a thousand miles per hour.  She had been telling herself she was fine with leaving the  twins at daycare, but now that they had done it, she was anxious and worried.  She somehow made it through her meeting at 42 with minimal distraction, but by the time she was back in her car, she actually felt like she might have a panic attack.  </p><p>She started driving, planning on going to 19 to work, but when her car stopped, she found that she had driven to Grey Sloan.  She shook her head, not really even remembering driving there.  </p><p>Since she was there, however, she got out of the car, deciding to go and just take a peek at the babies.  She went to the daycare, biting her lip as she walked up to the door.  </p><p>“Hi Maya,” one of the daycare workers said, “I thought Carina was picking up the girls today.”  </p><p>“She is,” Maya said, nodding, “I was just in the area and wanted to see how they were doing.”</p><p>“Well, they are both currently sleeping,” the daycare worker said, looking at Maya’s body language, “Would you like to see them?”</p><p>  “Please,” Maya nodded, “I won’t wake them up, I promise.”  </p><p>“I know how hard it is to leave them,” the daycare worker said, “I had to put both of mine in daycare when I was teaching.  Of course, now they’re older than you and have kids of their own, but I can still remember what it was like.  Here are your girls.”  </p><p>Maya smiled as looked through the window and saw Nora curled up with her favorite green blanket, two fingers in her mouth.  Rowan was in the bed right next to her, her little butt sticking up in the air like it always was.  Maya jumped a little when she felt a hand on her shoulder.  </p><p>“What are you doing here?” Carina asked.  </p><p>“I was going back to my office and somehow I ended up here,” Maya said, looking down at her hands. </p><p> “Uh huh,” Carina said, raising an eyebrow.  </p><p>“Ok, leaving them here has been a lot harder than I thought,” Maya admitted, looking at Carina, “I just needed to see them.” </p><p> “Me too,” Carina nodded, wrapping her arms around Maya as they both looked at the girls, “They are so adorable when they sleep.” </p><p> “They take after you,” Maya said, turning her head and smiling at her wife. </p><p> Carina laughed a little, shaking her head as she captured Maya’s lips for a quick kiss. </p><p> “We both need to get back to work,” Carina said, looking at the babies.  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said sighing, “I have so much paperwork to do.”  </p><p>They looked at the babies again.  </p><p>“Maybe just one more minute,” Maya said, smiling as Nora started sucking her fingers again.  </p><p>Eventually, they both managed to pull themselves away, Carina getting paged, and Maya realizing she had a meeting at 88 that she needed to grab some files for before she went. </p><p> After her meeting, she headed back to 19, only having paperwork to cover for the rest of the day.  There was a knock on her door around 11, Andy coming in.  </p><p>“Hey,” the captain said, smiling at her friend, “I have our incident reports from last month.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya said, half smiling.  </p><p>“What’s going on?” Andy asked, sitting down in one of the chairs.  </p><p>“It’s Rowan and Nora’s first day of daycare,” Maya said, shaking her head, “And leaving them is a little harder than I thought.”  </p><p>“You’ve been back for a week?” Andy said, confused.  </p><p>“Yeah, but Carina was on nights and our days off were opposites so the girls got to be home an extra week,” Maya said, “Our days off conflicting used to be the worst thing ever, but now, it means the babies get to spend more time at home.”  </p><p>“I remember leaving Luca for the first time,” Andy nodded, “It was so hard.  You remember.” </p><p> “Yeah, you cried in your bunk for almost an hour,” Maya nodded.  </p><p>“In my defense, I was running on very little sleep and a lot of hormones,” Andy said, “Hopefully, this time will be a little easier.” </p><p> “This time?” Maya said, looking at Andy, “Did you guys get chosen?” </p><p> “We did,” Andy said, smiling, “We got the call this morning.  A birth mom who is pregnant with a little girl and due in two weeks picked us.”  </p><p>“Andy!” Maya said, getting up, “Congratulations!” </p><p> “Thanks,” she said, smiling as Maya gave her a hug, “We are pretty excited.  Although, this means I am going to need maternity leave soon.” </p><p> “Of course,” Maya nodded, “I can cover for you as captain, or Miller and Montgomery could take turns with it.”  </p><p>“You should probably take it,” Andy said, “We are strapped for people on A shift right now.” </p><p> “You should probably do it,” Andy said with a sigh, “A shift is still trying to get their legs under them after all the shake ups this year.  Plus, we still barely have enough people.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya sighed, “I’ve been trying to get you some new people.  Academy graduation is in a few months, and hopefully, we will get a new probie.”  </p><p>“Just what we need,” Andy said, shaking her head, “Another probie.” </p><p> “Has she gotten any better?” Maya asked, knowing Andy and the rest of the A shift had been struggling with their new probie who was not good at taking instruction and was overeager with everything.  </p><p>“She’s getting there,” Andy nodded, “Robert is ready to kill her by the end of most shifts, but she’s getting better.”  </p><p>Robert was in charge of training her as the shift’s last probie, which was hard on both Robert and the newest member of the station.  </p><p>“Well, I can work with her once I get everything back in order here,” Maya said, “Maybe by the time your maternity leave is done, you will have a proper firefighter.”  </p><p>“Hopefully,” Andy said, “By then, she will have been here almost a year.  Are you going to join us for lunch today?”</p><p> “Probably not,” Maya sighed, “I have so much work to do and instead of doing it this morning like I should, I went and watched the babies sleep at daycare.”  </p><p>“You are such a mom,” Andy said, laughing, “Alright.  I will leave you alone with your work.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya said, sitting back down at her desk, “And congratulations again.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Andy said, smiling as she left, closing the door behind her.  </p><p>The alarm went off about an hour later, and Maya still jumped up every time before remembering she was staying here.  She continued working until there was another knock on her door.  She was pretty sure the entire station was out, but it could have been anyone.  </p><p>“Come in,” she called, getting up and opening her office door, “Carina.  What are you doing here?” </p><p> “Well, I thought maybe you could use a little lunch and maybe some snuggles with the babies,” Carina said, pushing the stroller into Maya’s office, “Who, by the way, did great in daycare, according to everyone there.”  </p><p>“Good job girls,” Maya smiled, going over to the stroller and picking Rowan up while Carina got Nora, “How was work today?”  </p><p>“Routine,” Carina said, shrugging, “Just back to back patients all morning.  I saw a mom who found out today that she was expecting twins.  Ever since we got pregnant with these two, I always feel so much more connected to twin moms.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, smiling at the little girl in her arms, “You said you had food?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, pulling out a bag, “I got soup and sandwiches.  The girls are at daycare.”  </p><p>“Was it fun to eat lunch with a bunch of other kids?” Maya asked Rowan as they sat down at Maya’s desk to eat, the blonde moving some paperwork to make room. </p><p> Lunch was nice as just as they finished, Maya heard the barn doors open.  </p><p>“Do you think these two will last to say hi to their aunts and uncles?” Maya said, looking down and seeing that Rowan still looked pretty awake.  </p><p>“Nap time isn’t for half an hour,” Carina said, shrugging, “Nora might complain, but she loves Travis so much that she will probably let it go.” </p><p> Maya laughed, nodding.  Recently, they had had their friends over for a get together and Nora fell in love with Travis, shrieking every time anyone else tried to take her.</p><p>  “Let’s go surprise them,” Maya said, taking one last bite of her lunch before they got up, each of them carrying one of the babies down the stairs. </p><p> They walked into the barn just as everyone climbed out of the trucks.  </p><p>“That was maybe the stupidest call we have ever had,” they heard Andy say from the other side of the barn, “Why did they need all of us.  It was literally a stovetop fire that we could have put out with an extinguisher.”  </p><p>“Babies,” Vic said, spotting Maya and Carina as she climbed out of the aid car.  </p><p>“What?” Travis said, coming around, “Oh, babies.  Hey Carina.” </p><p> “Hello,” Carina smiled as Travis took Nora, the little girl lighting up in his arms.  </p><p>Before long, everyone was standing around them, chatting and passing babies around.  Rowan got fussy with Ben, and Carina took her, gently rocking her as they talked.  Travis looked down at Nora, who again, refused to let anyone by Travis hold her, smiling when her saw she was sleeping.  </p><p>“Umm, I think I may have put your kid to sleep,” Travis said, walking over to Maya, the blonde carefully taking the sleeping baby. </p><p>“It’s nap time,” the blonde said, looking at her watch.  </p><p>“Yeah, I probably should take them home,” Carina nodded, “It was good to see everyone.”  </p><p>“You all need to get the trucks back in order,” Andy said, walking out of the barn with her friends, going into her office as Maya and Carina headed upstairs.  </p><p>“Thanks for coming today,” Maya said as she carefully put Nora into her car seat. </p><p> “Of course,” Carina said, “I know leaving them was just as hard for you as it was for me, but you have to work a full day today so I thought you could use a little reassurance.”  </p><p>“I knew they would be fine,” Maya said, shrugging, “I just… I don’t know.”  </p><p>“You worry,” Carina said, knowingly, “We are mothers now.  I think worry is built into that, at least into good mothers.” </p><p> “Yeah,” Maya nodded, smiling as she walked over to her wife, “I think you might be right.  Get these two home.  I should be home by 6.” </p><p> “Alright,” Carina said, giving her a kiss, “Love you.”  </p><p>“I love you too,” Maya said, going back to her desk.  </p><p>The rest of her shift was much easier, and she got through everything she needed to in record time.  </p><p>Once she was done, she headed home, finding Carina cooking in the kitchen while the girls played in the newest addition to their kitchen, high chairs.  </p><p>“Hey,” Maya said, walking over and giving Carina a quick kiss before going to say hi to the twins.  </p><p>“How was the rest of your work?” Carina asked, stirring a pot on the stove. </p><p> “It was good,” Maya said, “I mostly just did paperwork, but I got so much done.”  </p><p>“Good,” Carina smiled, “Dinner is almost ready.”  </p><p>“It smells great,” Maya smiled, “Do you need any help?”  </p><p>“You could get out bowls and forks,” Carina said, “And you could get something else for the babies to eat.  They already had avocado.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, going to the fridge.  </p><p>Food was a relatively new thing for the girls, and they had decided to do baby led weaning so they were just giving the girls regular food.  It had been about a month, and both girls were doing well.  Rowan had three teeth already, but Nora was still all gums so both of them were pretty much only getting soft foods.  </p><p>Maya decided to give them some cheese and some banana.  Both girls were already messy, Maya shaking her head as Rowan rubbed her green hand in her hair.  </p><p>“This girl is determined to get a bath every night,” Maya said, shaking her head as she put a slice of cheese and half a banana on their trays. </p><p> “I know,” Carina said, shaking her head, “At least she always smells good now.” </p><p> “True,” Maya nodded, watching as Nora picked up the banana, sticking out her tongue and licking it, “It is so funny to watch them eat.”  </p><p>“Lo so,” Carina said as Maya went and grabbed out bowls and forks, setting them on the counter before getting two glasses of water.  </p><p>Carina dished out some pasta for both of them and put a small amount in a bowl to cool so the girls could have it too before they sat down.  </p><p>After dinner, they gave the twins a bath before getting them ready for bed.  </p><p>Once the girls were down, Maya and Carina went into the their bedroom, changing into their pajamas before going downstairs to work and spend some time together. </p><p> “I think the girls are going to like daycare,” Carina said as they got comfortable.  </p><p>“Me too,” Maya said, “Which is good, becuae I think they are going to be there more than we planned in the next few months.”  </p><p>“Why?” Carina asked, confused. </p><p> “Well, I am going back to being acting captain of 19 in a few weeks,” Maya said.</p><p>  “What happened to Andy?” Carina asked, worried for their friend. </p><p> “She and Robert got chosed by a birth mom this morning,” Maya said, smiling, “And she is due in two weeks and A shift is strapped for people so I am taking her place while she’s on maternity leave.”  </p><p>“That is so exciting,” Carina said, smiling, “For Andy and Robert, I mean.  For us, it is stressful.” </p><p> “I will be fine, Babe,” Maya said, taking Carina’s hand in hers, “It is going to be extra work, but I think I can get Montgomery and Miller to do the paperwork side of things, or at least some of it.  It will be hard, but it’s only temporary.  And then, by the time Andy’s back, it will be almost time to go it Italy.” </p><p> “I almost forgot about that,” Carina said, shaking her head, “Si.  It will be good.”  </p><p>“I know having me back as acting captain is probably not your favorite idea,” Maya said, looking at her wife, “But I will be safe.  And it’s my team.  They have my back.”  </p><p>“I know,” Carina nodded, I just worry.  But I always worry about you.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya nodded, “I wish you didn’t have to.” </p><p> “But then you would have a job you did not like,” Carina said, smiling at Maya, “And the way you love your job makes the worrying worth it because of how happy it makes you.” </p><p> “I love you, you know that?” Maya said, setting her laptop down on the table.  </p><p>“Maybe you can show me a little?” Carina said, setting down her own laptop as Maya leaned over and kissed her deeply.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Up next: Date Night! What did you think of this chapter?  I hope you're enjoying this story.  As always, any prompts you have either for this cute little family or for anything else you'd like to see me write, just let me know!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0019"><h2>19. Date Night</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The girls had officially been in daycare for a month, and apart from a little bit of fussiness every day at drop off for the first two weeks, they were doing well.  The staff at Grey Sloan loved the girls and both babies seemed happy.  It made it easier for Maya and Carina to leave them when they had to.  </p><p>Andy and Robert’s newest addition, Veronica “Ronnie” Ryan, had come into the world about three days after they were selected meaning that for almost a month, Maya had been acting captain of Station 19, making her work schedule was back to what it had been pre babies, but luckily, they had managed to work their schedules so when they were both working overnight, it wasn’t on the same night.  </p><p>Now that they had fallen into a good routine, Maya decided it was time for them to have some time to themselves.  She checked with Vic and Travis, making sure they were both free on Friday night, knowing both she and Carina were off then too.  She got reservations at a restaurant they went to often before the girls were born before telling Carina about it. </p><p> They were lying in bed after putting the girls to bed on Tuesday night just cuddling.  </p><p>“I have a surprise for you,” Maya said, looking at Carina. </p><p> “Cosa?” Carina asked. “We are going on a date,” Maya said, smiling, “I made plans for Friday night.  We are both off and Vic and Travis agreed to babysit and I made us reservations at Roma and the drive-in is playing one of our favorite movies and we can finally go on a date for the first time since the babies were born.”  </p><p>“Oh,” Carina said, biting her lip anxiously, “Yeah,  maybe.” </p><p> “What’s wrong?” Maya asked.  </p><p>“We’ve never left the girls before,” Carina said, playing with her hands.  </p><p>“We leave them at daycare all the time,” Maya said, confused.  </p><p>“But I am in the building with them.  If something happens, I am right there,” Carina said, “We will be leaving them here and we will be… not here.”  </p><p>“Babe, Vic and Travis are both know how to take care of babies,” Maya said, “Or at least Vic does, and she can help Travis.  The girls love them and Vic  helped raise Pru when she was a baby, and let’s be real, all Travis has to do is smile at Nora and she’s happy.”  </p><p>“I guess,” Carina said, knowing Maya was right.  </p><p>“Come on,” Maya said, “We haven’t been out in so long, and it’ll only be a few hours.  I bet I could even convince Vic to send us updates every hour.”</p><p>“Alright,” Carina agreed reluctantly, “I guess that would be fine.  And it would be nice to have a date.  We haven’t left the house together without the babies since they were born.” </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, “And it will be good for us to leave them and just be together for a little bit.”  </p><p>“And you said you got reservations at Roma?” Carina asked, circling back.  </p><p>“I did,” Maya nodded, “I know you always say it’s the best Italian in Seattle, and it’s by the Sound so we can enjoy that too, if we want.”  </p><p>“Fine,” Carina said, “Let’s do it.” </p><p> “Really?” Maya said, eyes lighting up a little. </p><p> “Si,” Carina nodded.  Maya smiled, giving Carina a kiss.  </p><p>Maya was hoping that maybe, a date would be the thing their relationship needed to start getting back on track. Their sex life since becoming moms had been lacking to say the least.  </p><p>Carina, along with her PPA, was having a really hard time with her body and all the changes it had gone through when she was pregnant.  She loved that her body was able to carry two babies for as long as it had, but she was still trying to get comfortable in her own skin that was now a little looser than she was used to and had stretch marks.  </p><p>She hadn’t gained much extra weight while she was pregnant, and nursing combined with forgetting to actually put calories in her body while she was worrying about the babies had brought her weight back down quickly, but she was carrying it differently now.  She knew Maya loved her no matter how she looked, but she had been finding it hard to love herself.  </p><p>Maya deeply respected what Carina needed and was not going to push her in the slightest, but she also wanted to reassure her wife that she loved her and her body even though it was different than before.  She told her this often and tried to help her feel more secure, but they had yet to actually have sex since they were trying to help Carina’s labor progress, and that was far from the hot, steamy sex they were used to.  </p><p>They had had a moment in the bathtub, but that was not at all sexual, Maya too depressed to think about anything like that. </p><p> The days leading up to their date were stressful.  Maya ended up working a double from Wednesday to Friday morning, leaving her exhausted because she got no sleep.  </p><p>It was her day to be home with the girls because Carina had to work, Maya barely making it home before Carina had to head out. </p><p> “Oh, Bambina,” Carina frowned as her wife walked through the door, “You look exhausted.  Do you want me to put the girls in daycare so you can rest?” </p><p> “No,” Maya said, shaking her head, “I’ll try to grab a nap while they nap.  Try to be home on time tonight?  Our reservations are for 7, but Vic and Travis are coming over at 6 just in case you get off early.”  </p><p>“Are you going to be up for that?” Carina asked, pouring herself some coffee as Maya went over to the high chairs, smiling at Nora and Rowan who were both eating a banana.  “</p><p>Yep,” Maya nodded, “Hopefully these two will take two good naps for me.”</p><p>  “Alright,” Carina nodded, planting a kiss on Maya’s lips before giving both the girls a quick kiss before heading out the door, “Love you.”  </p><p>“Love you too,” Maya called as she tried to mentally prepare for her day.  </p><p>Once the babies finished eating, Maya cleaned them up before bringing them into the living room to play.  </p><p>Rowan was extremely mobile at this point, crawling and pulling up on furniture.  Nora had just started crawling about a week ago, but she was getting pretty fast.  </p><p>Maya had installed baby gates before she had gone back to work because Rowan was already crawling at that point.  They had the living room completely baby proofed so all Maya had to do was close the gate, and she knew the babies would be safe.  She sat on the floor, reading a few books before the girls decided to go play with their toys.  </p><p>About a half an hour later, Nora crawled over to Maya, sticking her fingers in her mouth as the blonde picked her up.  </p><p>“It’s nap time,” Maya said, smiling at the little girl, “Let’s go get some milk and go upstairs.”</p><p>  Once Maya got the girls down, she turned the baby monitor all the way up before crawling into bed.  She managed to fall asleep quickly, waking up when she heard crying.  </p><p>She groaned as she got up, going to get the twins up.  They played for a while before Maya made some lunch for the twins.  The girls were excellent eaters, and despite Nora’s lack of teeth, they both ate just about everything that was put in front of them. </p><p> Today, Maya made them peanut butter sandwiches, mango, tomato, and some boiled carrots.  </p><p>“I am so tired today girls,” Maya said as she started making herself a smoothie, “And I am supposed to take your mamma out tonight, so I need you both to take a good nap this afternoon, ok?”  </p><p>Rowan just screeched, smiling at Maya as Nora started babbling “mamamamama.”  </p><p>“Yes, Mamma,” Maya smiled, knowing she wasn’t really talking about Carina, but it was still pretty cute, nonetheless.  </p><p>Once the babies had eaten, Maya decided to take them for a run, knowing it would help her feel better and get the girls outside which was always good.  They went for a short run before Maya took them to a park near their house, pushing the girls in the swings for a while before they started getting tired.  </p><p>She then took them home, putting them down for another nap before crashing again herself.  Unfortunately, Nora decided she wasn’t feeling the nap that afternoon, and less than a half an hour after Maya put them down, the little girl was awake and crying. </p><p> Maya quickly got up, hoping she could keep Rowan asleep, but unfortunately, that did not happen, and by the time Maya got to the bedroom, both girls were crying.  </p><p>“What’s going on?” Maya asked, picking both girls up, “Nap time isn’t over yet.” </p><p> She tried to sit in the rocking chair with them, attempting to coax them back to sleep.  She almost had Rowan asleep, but Nora kept kicking her and yelling, keeping her sister up.  </p><p>After twenty minutes, she gave up, taking the twins downstairs.  She set Nora down, Rowan still in a bad mood because she had been woken up and demanding to be held.  </p><p>Maya brought the baby into the kitchen with her, starting a pot of coffee.  She needed to wake up because it was currently 3 pm, and she felt like she was going to pass out from exhaustion.  She was determined that tonight was going to be special, but in order for that to happen, she had to actually be awake for it. </p><p> Once the coffee was made, she poured herself a cup, carrying it and Rowan back to the living room where Nora was sitting, chewing on a teething toy while dancing to some music from a toy. Rowan sighed, rubbing her face on face on Maya’s shoulder.  </p><p>“I know, Ro,” Maya said, rubbing her back, “I wanted you two to sleep longer too.”</p><p>Eventually, Rowan woke up enough that she wanted to go play.  Maya got down on the floor after she finished her coffee, stacking up blocks and letting the girls knock them down which was apparently the funniest thing ever.  </p><p>At 5, Maya went into the kitchen, starting dinner for the girls, feeding them one of their favorite foods, pasta with sweet potatoes, black beans, and shredded cheese and berries for dessert.  By the time the girls were done eating, it was 5:45, and both of them were covered in food.  </p><p>“I guess you are both getting a bath before Aunt Vic and Uncle Travis get here,” Maya sighed, looking at the clock.  </p><p>As she pulled the girls out of their high chairs, the doorbell rang. </p><p> “Who is that?” Maya wondered out loud as she went to open the door.  </p><p>“Hey,” Vic said, smiling at her friend.  </p><p>“What are you two doing here?” Maya asked, confused.  </p><p>“We decided to come a little early,” Travis said, smiling as Nora reached for him, “Give you some time to get ready.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya said, “I was about to go give these two a bath because they are firm believers that dinner is meant to be worn as well as eaten.”  </p><p>“Let us do it,” Vic said, taking Rowan, “You look like you could use a shower and a few minutes alone.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya smiled, guiding them upstairs to the twins’ bathroom.  </p><p>“Did you get any sleep today?” Travis said, realizing that Maya had worked a double and then come home to her kids.  </p><p>“Like an hour and a half,” Maya shrugged, “Nora decided to boycott afternoon nap and take me and Rowan with her so they will probably go down early.”  </p><p>“How are you functioning?” Travis asked, shaking his head.</p><p> “I am magic,” Maya said jokingly.  </p><p>“Alright,” Vic said, “Go shower.  I see their towels, and I am an expert at giving babies baths so don’t worry about anything.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya said, smiling as she went down the hall.  She showered quickly, and as she got out, Carina walked into the room.  </p><p>“You’re home,” Maya smiled, walking over to her still wrapped in a towel.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, pressing a kiss to her lips.  </p><p>“How was work?” Maya asked as she dried herself off.  </p><p>“Good,” Carina nodded, “Two emergency C-sections, but other than that, nothing special.  How were the girls?  Did you get any sleep?” </p><p>“They were good,” Maya said, “Although, Nora decided she did not want an afternoon nap and woke Rowan up too, but I got about an hour and a half during their first nap.”  </p><p>“I’m sorry they didn’t nap this afternoon,” Carina frowned as she started to change her own clothes, “Are you still feeling up to going out?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, “Of course.”  </p><p>Both of them got dressed, Maya opting for black pants and a flowy blue shirt, Carina choosing grey slacks and a pink, yellow, black, and white striped shirt.  They both did their makeup, ready to go in about forty minutes.  </p><p>“You look beautiful,” Maya said as Carina came out of the bathroom after curling her hair.  </p><p>“So do you,” Carina smiled, walking over to Maya, pressing a kiss to her lips.  </p><p>Maya deepened it, kissing Carina’s jaw.  </p><p>“Not now,” Carina laughed, pushing her off, “We have reservations.” </p><p> “Fine,” Maya said, knowing Carina was right, “Shall we?”  </p><p>“We shall,” Carina nodded, laughing a little. </p><p> They left the bedroom, finding Vic, Travis and the girls downstairs, Travis reading to Nora on the couch while Vic stacked blocks with Rowan.  </p><p>“Look at you two,” Travis whistled as Maya and Carina walked into the room, “Sexy mom’s night out.” </p><p> Carina laughed, shaking her head.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, “There are bottles ready to go in the fridge, green is Nora, yellow is Rowan.  They usually go down around 7:30, but they didn’t nap this afternoon so if they act tired or cranky, just put them down early.”  </p><p>“Oh, and at bed time, Nora needs her green blanket, and Rowan needs her penguin with the blanket attached. We usually read them two books and then sing a song and then put them down,” Carina continued, “Here is money for takeout, or you can have whatever is in the fridge. Call us if you need anything.  We won’t be out late.”  </p><p>“Have fun,” Vic said, smiling, “We have them taken care of so don’t worry about anything.”  </p><p>“Thanks so much for doing this,” Maya smiled as they gave the girls kisses, “Bye Piccola.  We will be back soon.”  </p><p>“Ciao Patatina,” Carina said, “Have fun with Zia Vic and Zio Travis.” </p><p> “Come on Car,” Maya said as Carina held Rowan, “They will be fine.”  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said as Vic held out her arms for the blonde haired baby, “Just one more hug.”  </p><p>“Come on,” Maya said, plucking Rowan out of Carina’s arms, giving her one more kiss before handing her to Vic, “We will be back by 10.”  </p><p>“But…” Carina said as Maya pulled her toward the door.  </p><p>“Let’s go,” Maya said, opening the garage door. </p><p> They climbed into their car, Maya driving.  </p><p>“Maybe we should just check on them one more time,” Carina said as Maya started to back out.  </p><p>“Carina, they are going to be fine,” Maya said, shaking her head, “Vic and Travis are both EMTs, and all they have to do is play with them and then put them down for the night.  Everything will be fine.  Let’s go enjoy our evening.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, taking a deep breath. </p><p> “And Vic promised me she would send us an update every hour,” Maya said, taking Carina’s hand in her, “They are going to be fine.  Sometimes, I am convinced Nora likes Travis more than us anyways.” </p><p> “She does really love her Zio Travis,” Carina laughed, nodding, “I am glad she has someone like him in her life.”  “I am glad our girls have a lot of strong men and women in their lives to be there for them and make them into good people,” Maya smiled, “They are really lucky.”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina agreed, kissing the back of Maya’s hand, “And they have a pretty amazing Mom too.”  </p><p>“And an incredible Mamma,” Maya said, leaning over and giving Carina a quick peck on the lips as she stopped at a red light.  </p><p>They made it to the restaurant right on time.  </p><p>“It’s so strange to be out of the house without the babies,” Carina said as they sat down, “To not have to worry about a bottle or bib or diaper.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, as their waiter came over, Maya ordering a bottle of Carina’s favorite wine for them to share.  </p><p>They enjoyed their time together, Carina filling Maya in on her latest research breakthrough, something that had slowed down a lot since the girls came around, but Carina still found some time to work on it here and there.  Maya told Carina about an interesting call they had gotten during her crazy double shift, but both of them found it hard to talk about anything but the girls after that.  They got an update from Vic once the girls were down, both of them just staring at the pictures of Rowan asleep in her crib and Nora curled up on Travis.  </p><p>“Why is it so hard to be away from them?” Maya sighed, stifling a yawn.  </p><p>“Because we love them,” Carina said, watching her wife yawn again, “We can go home if you’re too tired.”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, shaking her head, “I’m good.”  </p><p> They ordered dessert before going to walk by the Sound.  </p><p>“This is beautiful,” Carina said, smiling as they sat down on a bench, grateful the weather was warm and dry tonight.  </p><p>“You’re beautiful,” Maya said, smiling as she captured Carina’s lips on hers.  </p><p>They enjoyed a little more time together before deciding to head home.  They got home, finding Travis and Vic watching movies on their couch.  </p><p>“How was your date?” Vic asked as they walked in. </p><p> “It was nice,” Carina smiled, “Thank you for watching the girls.  Were they good?”  </p><p>“They were tiny terrors,” Travis said, “Running all over, smearing peanut butter on everything, swinging from the chandeliers.”  </p><p>Carina and Maya both laughed, shaking their heads.  </p><p>“They were great,” Travis said seriously, “Don’t tell anyone, but your kids are my favorites.”  </p><p>“That’s just because Nora is literally in love with you,” Vic said, shaking her head, “She’s gonna be so sad when she grows up and realizes you bat for the other team.”  </p><p>“Gross,” Travis said, shaking his head.  </p><p>“Seriously, thank you so much for watching them,” Maya said, laughing, “It was good to get out just the two of us.”  </p><p>“Anytime,” Vic said, “Seriously.  Your kids are angels.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Carina said as they walked Vic and Travis out.  </p><p>“See you both on Sunday morning,” Maya called, yawning as Vic and Travis left.  </p><p>“Come on,” Carina said, pulling Maya toward the stairs, whispering in her ear, “I have something planned for you.”  </p><p>Maya’s eyes widened as they went upstairs, checking in on the babies quickly before going into their room.  </p><p>“I will be right back,” Carina said, nipping at Maya’s ear.  </p><p>The blonde nodded as Carina went into the bathroom.  Carina changed into a new set of lingerie she had bought after Maya had told her about date night.  She still wasn’t as confident as she had been in her body, but she was ready to reintroduce sex into their relationship.  </p><p>She stepped out of the bathroom, expecting to see Maya waiting for her in bed.  However, when she opened the bathroom door, she couldn’t help but laugh.  Maya was laying on the bed in only her underwear, fast asleep.  </p><p>“Oh Bambina,” Carina said, pressing a kiss to Maya’s temple.  </p><p>She went and changed into a t-shirt before turning off the lights and climbing into bed next to Maya.  </p><p>“Car,” Maya said, stirring a little as the bed shifted, “Wait, what?”  </p><p>“Sleep, Bambina,” Carina said.  </p><p>“But you had a surprise,” Maya said, already starting to fall asleep again.  </p><p>“And you can have it tomorrow,” Carina said, “After you sleep.”  </p><p>“I love you,” Maya mumbled, moving into Carina’s arms.  </p><p>“I love you too, Bambina,” Carina said, pressing a gently kiss to her lips, “So much.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  This story is honestly so enjoyable to write, so thank you for giving me a place to put it besides just on my computer.  As always, any prompts for this story are happily accepted! Thank you for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos.  Also, less than one week until we finally get Station 19 and Grey's back, and I am so ready!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0020"><h2>20. Teething and Periods</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Rowan had been such an easy teether.  She cut her first tooth at five months, and apart from the insane amount of drool she produce that soaked all her clothes, and the rash on her chin, there were very few signs Rowan was cutting teeth.  The only other thing was one night of terrible sleep, usually resulting in either Maya or Carina pacing the hall with the baby.  The first tooth Rowan had cut was discovered by Carina when she was bitten by the little girl while she nursed. </p><p> The twins were now nine months old and Rowan had four teeth with two more looking like they might break through any day.  Nora, however, had no teeth.  She had been drooling just as long as Rowan had, but there were no other signs that there were teeth coming.  </p><p>One day, while Carina was home with the twins and Maya was working, Nora was in a mood.  She was crying, wouldn’t eat, and just seemed miserable.  She sucked on her fingers, and just wanted to lay on Carina all day.  She was pulling on her ear, which worried Carina because she knew ear infections were common in babies this age.  Nora didn’t feel too warm, but her clinginess was very abnormal for her.  She was so fussy, and nothing seemed to make her feel any better.  </p><p>“Are we going to end up at the doctor tomorrow?” Carina asked as she paced around the house, Nora just lying in her arms, pulling on her ear as she fussed, “Is your ear hurting?”  </p><p>Nora just sighed, finally closing her eyes.  Carina just let her nap on her, not daring to put the little girl down in fear of waking her up.  </p><p>Maya got home not long after, having worked the night before.  </p><p>“What’s going on?” the blonde asked quietly, seeing the baby napping on her wife instead of in her bed.  </p><p>“Something is bothering her,” Carina sighed, “I think she might have an ear infection or something.  She has barely eaten all day, she’s pulling at her ear, and she’s super fussy.”  </p><p>“Do you want to take her in?” Maya asked, frowning.  </p><p>“I don’t know,” Carina said, “I’ll see how she is when she wakes up.  How was work?”  </p><p>“It was good,” Maya said, “Andy is back next week, and I am so ready.  I like being back out in the field every day, but all the extra paperwork, plus trying to still get around to all the other stations is a lot.”  </p><p>“Well, you have been doing an excellent job,” Carina said, carefully leaning over and giving Maya a kiss so as not to disturb the sleeping baby on her chest.  </p><p>They two of them just sat there talking for a little while before both girls woke up.  Nora was still fussy and needy, going to Maya so Carina could breastfeed Rowan.  </p><p>“Come on Nora,” Maya said, offering her a bottle, “Eating might make you feel better.”  </p><p>Nora eventually took about half her bottle, mostly just chewing on the nipple.  She spit it out, grabbing her ear as she started to cry.  </p><p>“Hey, Car,” Maya said, getting a look in the little girl’s mouth as she screamed, “Do you see what I see?”  </p><p>“Her gums,” Carina said, eyes wide, “Now it all makes sense.  She’s teething.”  </p><p>“Rowan was never like this,” Maya said, getting up and pacing, trying to help Nora calm down.  </p><p>“Getting teeth doesn’t bother some babies,” Carina shrugged as she adjusted Rowan, “And some it bothers a lot.  Apparently, it bothers Nora a lot.” </p><p> “You don’t think she’s got an ear infection or something else going on?” Maya asked as Nora finally settled with her fingers in her mouth. </p><p> “She could,” Carina said, “But she doesn’t have a fever, and all her other symptoms can be from getting teeth.  If she’s still this miserable tomorrow, we can take her to the doctor.  We can give her some Tylenol though.”  </p><p>“I’ll go grab it,” Maya said, going into the kitchen. </p><p> “Would it be alright if I took Rowan for a run?” Maya asked as she gave the medicine to Nora, the baby making a face as she took it, “If you want me to stay and help with Nora, that’s fine.  I can get on the treadmill once they go down.”  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “No, go for your run.  Hopefully, the Tylenol will help her feel better soon.”  </p><p>“I’ll pick up dinner on our way home,” Maya said, heading upstairs. </p><p> Once Maya was ready, she loaded Rowan into the stroller before heading for a run.  An hour later, she got home to find a much happier Nora reading books with Carina.  </p><p>“Hey Piccola,” Maya said as she set Rowan down, “Are you feeling a little better?”  </p><p>“She still doesn’t want me to put her down,” Carina said, “But at least she seems a little more comfortable.”  </p><p>“Good,” Maya smiled, “Well, I have pho whenever we want to eat.  I need to stretch and grab a quick shower first.” </p><p> “Take your time,” Carina said, “We will just be here, reading books.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, going into the kitchen to stretch.  Rowan crawled in after her, climbing all over Maya as she laid on the floor stretching.  </p><p>“You are making this very hard,” Maya laughed as Rowan sat on her face, “Also, you need a diaper change.” </p><p> Rowan just laughed as Maya finished up her stretching, taking the baby into the living room to change her diaper.  </p><p>“She apparently needed to stretch after her run too,” Maya said as she quickly changed Rowan’s diaper.  </p><p>“She loves her Mommy,” Carina smiled as she watched Maya blow raspberries on Rowan’s belly, the baby laughing hysterically.  </p><p>“I’m gonna go hop in the shower,” Maya said, “I’ll be quick.”  </p><p>“I am probably going to start them on some food,” Carina said, “It’s almost dinner time.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, “I won’t take too long.”  </p><p>Within twenty minutes, Maya was back downstairs, helping Carina with the babies who she was just getting into their chairs.  Rowan was excited to eat some noodles and pieces of chicken, but Nora was not having it, fussing every time Maya tried to put her in the high chair.  Eventually, she gave up and sat down at the table with Nora in her arms.  </p><p>“Poor Piccola,” Carina cooed, brushing her hand over Nora’s cheek that was bright red, but cool to the touch before handing the baby a teething toy, “This might help.” </p><p> Nora immediately put the toy in her mouth, chewing on it vigorously.  They all ate dinner, Maya coaxing a little bit of pho into Nora eventually.  Soon enough, it was time for the girls to have a bath and then go to bed.  </p><p>Nora, however, was having none of it.  She cried a little in the tub and screamed every time Carina tried to put her in her crib.  </p><p>“Let’s just take her with us for a little while,” Maya said, knowing Rowan was already out, “She clearly needs a little extra attention tonight, and she’s not feeling well.”  </p><p>Carina agreed, and they left the nursery with Nora.  </p><p>“What is supposed to help with teething?” Maya asked, trying to remember what she had been told by Andy and Amelia  and what she had read, “I think Andy said something about a cold wash cloth?”  </p><p>“For her to chew on, si,” Carina nodded as she held Nora, swaying a little to calm her down.  </p><p>Maya went into the bathroom, running a baby washcloth under the coldest water she could, ringing it out before bringing it into the master bedroom where Carina was sitting in bed with Nora.  </p><p>“Here you go Piccola,” Maya said, handing the cloth to her daughter.  </p><p>Nora took it, putting it right into her mouth, chewing on it. Maya and Carina spent the next three hours trying to coax Nora to sleep, the little girl only falling asleep for 20 minutes at a time, waking up fussing each time.  </p><p>Finally, it was time for her to have more medicine, and that made her comfortable enough to fall asleep for about five hours.  </p><p>However, at 3 am, she woke up screaming, both moms waking immediately.  </p><p>“I’ve got her,” Carina mumbled, getting up.  </p><p>She went into the nursery, picking Nora up.  </p><p>“Shhhh,” she said, walking out of the room in hopes of keeping Rowan asleep, “It’s ok.”</p><p>  Nora stopped screaming, but was still very upset, rubbing her ear on Carina’s shoulder, pulling on the other one with her hand.  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, frowning as she hand her hand over Nora’s forehead, feeling the heat coming off her, “Oh, you are really not feeling well, are you?”  </p><p>Nora just whimpered. Carina walked around downstairs, trying to calm Nora down.  Finally, she fell asleep, Carina opting to just lay down on the couch with her, hoping she would stay asleep.  </p><p>The next morning, Maya found them both there when she got up to go for a run, opting to go get on the treadmill just in case Carina needed her.  Just as she finished her run, she heard Rowan on the baby monitor.  She quickly went upstairs, grabbing Rowan.  As she changed the baby’s diaper, she heard footsteps.  </p><p>“Hey,” she said as Carina walked into the nursery with Nora, “How’s she doing?”  </p><p>“I think she might actually have an ear infection,” Carina sighed, “She has a fever now.  I’m going to call the pediatrician when they open.” </p><p> “Poor Piccola,” Maya frowned, “So you don’t think she’s getting teeth?” </p><p> “I don’t think she’s getting teeth,” Carina said, shaking her head, “I think she has teeth.  Two actually.  I saw them when we woke up, but I think she also has an ear infection.”  </p><p>“Two teeth?” Maya said, picking Rowan up, “Wow.”  </p><p>“I know,” Carina smiled, “Our babies are getting big.”  </p><p>Carina managed to get Nora an early appointment with the doctor, the baby getting diagnosed with a double ear infection that the doctor said could have been caused by the teething, but it also could have just been a coincidence.  Nora was put on antibiotics and some ear drops, neither of which seemed to do a lot for the first day.  Nora spent the night in their bed that night. </p><p> The next morning, however, when Maya and Carina got up for the say, Nora was back to her normal, smiley self plus two teeth.  </p><p> </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, double checking their diaper bag one last time, “We’ve got their food, bottles, extra clothes, diapers, wipes.  I think that’s everything.  Car, are you ready to go?”  </p><p>“I’m coming,” Carina called, coming down the stairs.  </p><p>“You alright?” Maya asked, having been waiting for her wife for the past five minutes, the babies crawling around the kitchen, trying to open every cabinet that had all been baby proofed by Maya prior to the twins’ arrival.  </p><p>“Just not feeling great,” Carina sighed, picking up Rowan, “I’ll be fine.”  </p><p>“Are you sure you still want to go to Amelia’s?”  Maya frowned, “If you aren’t feeling well, we can just stay home.  Amelia and Teddy will understand.” </p><p> “No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “I’m fine.  Come on.  Let’s go.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, grabbing Nora and the diaper bag before heading out to the car. Soon enough, they were on their way to Amelia and Link’s house where they were having a play date with Scout, Harper, Alison, and Leo.  For Carina and Maya, it was really just an excuse to hang out with their friends because the twins were still pretty little to play with other kids.   </p><p>They got there right on time, getting the girls out before going up to the front door, Carina knocking because Maya’s hands were full.  </p><p>“Hey,” Amelia said, opening the door, “Come on in.  Teddy texted. She’s running late, as always.  Harper and Scout are in the living room.”  </p><p>“Thanks for having us over,” Carina smiled as they took off their shoes.  </p><p>“Rowan, Nora,” Scout said, looking up and seeing the girls. </p><p> Maya and Carina smiled as they set the girls down to play, Harper toddling over to them too.  Harper was only a few months older than the twins, they would even eventually be in the same grade in school, but the difference between nine months and thirteen months seemed like a lot.</p><p> However, Scout was the perfect little mediator, making sure the twins had toys and telling Harper to share her toys.  Scout was four at this point, and the master of telling everyone else to share. </p><p> “Can I get you guys anything?” Amelia asked as Maya and Carina sat down.  </p><p>Both of them declined, and Amelia sat down, the three of them just talking and keeping an eye on the kids.  About twenty minutes later, there was a knock on the door, and Teddy came in with Leo and Alison in tow.  </p><p>“Sorry we are late,” Teddy said as Leo and Alison ran to play with the other kids, “Alison would not chose an outfit and then Leo lost his shoes.” </p><p> “It’s fine,” Amelia said, chuckling, “That is a walk in the park compared to what our mornings normally look like.” </p><p> The kids all played as the moms chatted.  After a while, Nora crawled over to Maya, the blonde scooping her up.  </p><p>“They are getting so big,” Teddy said, smiling as Nora looked at her. </p><p> “They are nine months old already,” Carina nodded, reaching over and smoothing down a piece of Nora’s hair that had escaped from the pig tails they were now able to get it into.  </p><p>“It feels like Alison was just that age,” Teddy said, “And now, she’s in kindergarten.” </p><p> The four women chatted until Scout walked up, announcing he was starving and needed food immediately or he would die.  </p><p>“He is so your and Link’s kid,” Maya laughed as they went into the kitchen, Maya grabbing the diaper bag which had the twins food in it. </p><p>“Hey, we both love food, what can I say?” Amelia shrugged as she pulled out the peanut butter and jelly, making sandwiches for Scout, Harper, Alison, and Leo.  </p><p>Carina and Maya each sat with one of the girls in their laps, letting the babies eat their food.  The moms all tried to corral their kids into eating, and as soon as the food was gone, the older kids raced outside to play on the epic playset Link had built for Scout a few years ago.   Nora, Harper, and Rowan were all still eating. </p><p> “I need to use the bathroom,” Carina said, handing Nora to Maya as she left.  </p><p>Maya continued talking to Teddy and Amelia.  Eventually, Amelia started cleaning up the table once Harper finished, the babies all playing on the floor.  It was then that Carina walked back in.  </p><p>“You alright?” Maya asked her quietly, noticing something seemed off.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, “But do you have any pads?”  </p><p>“Oh no,” Maya frowned, knowing Carina hadn’t gotten her period since the girls were born, “I think I have some tampons in the diaper bag, will that work?” </p><p> “No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “It is advised not to use tampons the first cycle back after babies.  I’ll just as Amelia.”  </p><p>“Care to share with the class?”  Teddy asked, noticing the two women were off to the side whispering to each other.  </p><p>“I need a pad,” Carina said, looking at her friends.  </p><p>“Oh, that bites,” Teddy said, frowning, “First one since the girls?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded.  </p><p>“I’ve got some upstairs,” Amelia said, “I’ll be right back.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Carina said, nodding.  </p><p>Soon enough, Amelia had given Carina what she needed, and they all went outside, Harper, Rowan, and Nora crawling around on the screened in porch that had some toys on it.  Harper toddled over to some cars, picking one up and walking over to Rowan, handing it to her.  Rowan smiled, taking the car and hitting it against the floor.  </p><p>“That was so sweet,” Carina smiled, watching Harper do the same thing for Nora, “It seems like Harper is taking Scout’s advice.”  </p><p>“Now if only I could get Scout to take Scout’s advice,” Amelia said, shaking her head, “He will not share with anyone, well, except maybe Rowan.  He loves her more than anyone.”  </p><p>“I mean, she is pretty cute,” Carina said, smiling as Rowan pulled herself up to standing using the couch.  </p><p>“Hi beautiful,” Teddy said, picking the blonde haired baby, “Man, sometimes, I look at all these babies, and it makes me want another one.”  </p><p>“Teddy, you hated being pregnant and having a baby,” Carina said, shaking her head as she laughed, “I mean, I know you loved baby Alison, but…” </p><p>“Oh, I don’t actually want another one,” Teddy said, shaking her head, “I am good with the ones I have.  And I think  Rowan just reminded me of another reason why.  Someone needs a diaper change.”  </p><p>“I’ve got her,” Maya said, standing up and taking the baby, going inside.  </p><p>She was almost finished when she heard the door open and Carina walked in with Nora.  </p><p>“Someone else also needs a clean diaper,” the doctor said, kneeling down next to her wife.  </p><p>“Are you feeling alright?” Maya asked, noticing Carina wince a little.  </p><p>“Si,” the brunette said, taking Rowan as she handed Nora to Maya, “Just cramping.  I will be fine.”  </p><p>“We can go whenever you want,” Maya said, skillfully changing Nora’s diaper, “And when we get home, I can do some of the things I used to do when you had cramps.” </p><p> “Maybe,” Carina said, “We will see when we get home.”   </p><p> She gave Maya a quick kiss before taking Rowan back out to the porch.  Once Nora was cleaned up, Maya grabbed her favorite blanket, knowing it was almost nap time, before taking her back out to the porch.  Nora stuck her fingers in her mouth, reaching for Carina as soon as she saw her.  </p><p>“We should probably go so they can nap,” Carina said, taking the little girl, “Nora can nap anywhere, but Rowan sleeps so much better in her bed.”  </p><p>“True,” Maya nodded, “Thanks so much for having us Amelia.”  </p><p>“Of course,” Amelia said, standing up to walk them out, “Thanks for coming.  This was fun, getting to see each other outside of the hospital.”  </p><p>After goodbyes, Maya and Carina got the twins loaded up, giving the twins their bottles which they had just learned how to hold themselves, before heading home.  </p><p>When they got there, Nora was asleep, and Rowan’s little eyes were clearly fighting sleep.  They took them upstairs, laying them down in their cribs.  </p><p>“I think I might go lay down too,” Carina said, “I am really not feeling well.”  </p><p>“Do you want me to help you feel better?”  Maya asked, wrapping her arms around Carina’s neck, pressing a kiss to her jaw.  </p><p>“Maybe if you just want to lay with me?” Carina asked, “I’m really not feeling up for anything else.” </p><p> “Of course,” Maya nodded, “Just give me a minute.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, heading into their bedroom.  Normally, her periods were no big deal, and with a little help from either Maya or her collection of toys, she was able to make it through relatively pain free.  </p><p>However, it had been a year and a half since she had had her period last, and everything hurt way more than normal.  She knew this was normal, but it didn’t make her feel any better, and the thought of being intimate right now actually made her feel worse. </p><p> A few minutes later, Maya came back up with a few things in her hands. </p><p> “Alright,” she said, “I have some hot chocolate, a hot rice bag, and some salt and vinegar chips.” </p><p> “You are the best,” Carina said, smiling as Maya climbed into bed next to her.  </p><p>“Now, just relax,” Maya said, pressing a gentle kiss to Carina’s lips.  </p><p>The brunette nodded, taking a sip of the cocoa, moaning a little when she realized it was her favorite, special Italian hot chocolate. </p><p> “Thank you,” Carina said, smiling at Maya, “For always knowing exactly what I need.”  </p><p>Maya just leaned over, kissing Carina again.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This chapter felt kinda disjointed when I was writing it, but I hope you liked it anyway! Neither part felt like they could stand alone so I just combined them.  Up next: First big family trip!! If you have any suggestions for scenarios for this little family, let me know!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0021"><h2>21. Off to Italy</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“I think this might be the stupidest idea we have ever had,” Carina said, pulling out 10 onesies from the drawer, adding them to the suitcase that was on the twins’ bedroom floor. </p><p> “It might be,” Maya nodded, grabbing a few blankets and adding them to the suitcase, “But it will be good for the girls to meet your family, and we will have Andrew to help us.” </p><p> “Si,” Carina nodded, grabbing out some dresses, “I know.” </p><p> “Hey,” Maya said, looking down on the floor and seeing Rowan and Nora pulling the blankets she had just put in the suitcase out, “What are you two bambinas doing?  I just packed those.” </p><p> Nora smiled as Rowan reached back into the suitcase.  </p><p>“Ok,” Maya said, scooping up the blonde haired little girl, “You cannot undo all the work Mamma and I are doing.  How about you two go play in your crib while we pack?”  </p><p>Maya plopped Rowan in the crib before putting Nora in as well, handing them some books and a few toys that would hopefully keep them busy.  That worked for about fifteen minutes before the girls started getting fussy.  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, picking up Nora, “Should we go get you two some lunch?”  </p><p>Each of them picked up a baby, taking them down to the kitchen. </p><p> They were leaving for Italy the following day for two weeks with Carina’s family.  Andrew was going with them.  It was going to be close to 20 hours of travel from Seattle to Sicily with two lay overs, something neither woman was looking forward to with two 10 month olds.  However, it was important for the girls to meet Carina’s family, and this seemed like the easiest time to do it.  The girls weren’t walking yet so containing them should be easier, but they weren’t so little that they were fussy a lot.   </p><p>After feeding the girls and putting them down for a nap, Maya and Carina continued packing for themselves, managing to get most of that done during the girls two hour afternoon nap.  Carina had made lists of what they needed to bring so they wouldn’t forget anything which Maya was grateful for because if Carina hadn’t, she would have. </p><p> Once the babies were awake, Carina finished packing their stuff while Maya played with the girls.  By the time they put the girls down that night, they had mostly finished packing and getting ready. </p><p> “Are we really doing this?” Maya asked as she worked on packing the diaper bag.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, packing her own backpack. </p><p>They finished with packing around midnight, Carina crawling into bed and falling asleep quickly.  For Maya, however, sleep did not come so easily.  </p><p>The last time they had been in Italy had been the Christmas before they had gotten married, and the trip had been beyond stressful.  Carina’s family was big and loud and nosy and overwhelming.  They all had a million questions for Maya about her life and her family and her work, and after just two days, Maya was on edge, irritable, and beyond anxious.  </p><p>She ended up having three panic attacks on Christmas Eve, one before they went to Carina’s aunt’s house and another one in the middle of dinner, both of which she hid from Carina, not wanting to ruin the first Christmas her fiancé had had with her family in three years.  However, when the third panic attack came during opening presents, Maya hadn’t gotten away from the group before Carina saw the look on her face.  Carina was slightly mad that Maya had hidden the earlier attacks from her and quickly got them out of the rest of the evening, claiming jetlag was really doing a number on them which wasn’t far from the truth.  </p><p>Two days after Christmas, they had a service for Carina’s father because this was the first time she and Andrea had been back to Italy since he died.  That had also been a lot, and by the time they headed home on New Year’s Day, both of them were emotionally drained. </p><p> Thinking about that made Maya nervous to go back, both for herself and Carina and because now they were brining two babies with them.  </p><p>However, this time, they didn’t have plans with Carina’s family every day and planned to spend a lot of time at various parks that Carina used to go as a kid, just wanting to have a somewhat relaxing time.  </p><p>Maya found herself entirely too wound up to sleep, resorting to going downstairs around midnight so as not to bother Carina.  She ended up falling asleep there sometime between 3 and 4 am, waking up at 5 when her alarm went off.  </p><p>She wanted to get a run in before they started their travels, knowing it was going to probably be a high stress day.  She checked on the girls, finding both of them still asleep.  She went into the bedroom, quietly pulling on her running gear before heading out.  She got 5 miles in before going home, knowing the babies would probably be up by 6:30 or 7.  She stepped inside, quickly stretching and hydrating before going upstairs. </p><p> Vic was coming at 9 to drive them to the airport so they didn’t have to pay to park a car for 2 weeks, their flight scheduled for noon.  It was already a little after 6 so Maya decided to wake Carina, knowing they needed to get going.  </p><p>“Babe,” Maya said, “It’s time to get up.” </p><p> “Fine,” Carina mumbled as Maya pressed a kiss into her lips, “What time is it?”  </p><p>“A little after 6,” Maya said, “I am about to go shower.  Care to join me before the girls wake up?” </p><p> “Si,” Carina nodded, getting out of bed.  </p><p>They enjoyed their time in the shower before Rowan started crying. </p><p> “I’ve got her,” Maya said, grabbing her towel, “You finish washing your hair.”  </p><p>Carina nodded as Maya got out, going into the nursery still wearing her towel.  </p><p>“Good morning Patatina,” Maya said, picking Rowan up.  </p><p>The baby smiled at her.  Maya checked on Nora who was just starting to wake up. </p><p> “Come here,” Maya said, scooping up the baby who was sucking on her fingers. </p><p> She carried them back to the master bedroom, setting Rowan on the floor to play and Nora on the bed to finish waking up.  Nora was so much like Carina in the mornings, wanting to take it slow, be allowed to take her time waking up, whereas Rowan was much more like Maya, ready to be up the second her eyes opened.  </p><p>Maya quickly dressed in her favorite clothes for traveling, yoga pants and a t-shirt.  While she was dressing, Carina came out of the bathroom, hair wrapped in a towel.  </p><p>“Bonjourno Rowan,” Carina said, laughing as the baby crawled over to her, reaching up, “Are you hungry?” </p><p> Rowan whined a little as Carina pulled out her clothes. </p><p> “I’m going to take Nora downstairs for a bottle,” Maya said, picking up the baby off the bed, “Feed Rowan and I’ll have breakfast ready when you’re done?” </p><p> “Sounds perfect,” Carina nodded as Maya left the room.  </p><p>Maya got Nora a bottle, holding the baby with one arm while making smoothies with the other.  She knew they were probably going to be eating not great during their travels and hoped this would maybe help with the upset stomach she always got when they spent the day traveling.  </p><p>Once the smoothie was made, Maya sat down on the couch to finish feeding Nora, the baby waking up a little more after her bottle. </p><p> Around the time Nora finished, Carina and Rowan also came downstairs.  They put the twins in their high chairs, giving them some cheerios, strawberries, and cheese along with some smoothie in sippy cups before they sat down at the table. </p><p> “Why did you sleep on the couch last night?” Carina asked, looking at her wife, “I woke up at 3:30 am and found you sleeping down here.” </p><p> “That was the only time I was asleep last night,” Maya confessed, “I don’t know.  I was too anxious about today to sleep.  I maybe got an hour last night.”  </p><p>“Oh, bambina,” Carina frowned, “I’m so sorry.  Today is going to be rough with no sleep.”  </p><p>“I’ll be ok,” Maya shrugged, “I will be fine.  I’m good at functioning without much sleep.  Plus, maybe the babies will sleep on the flight, and I can sleep then.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, reaching over and rubbing the back of her wife’s hand.  They finished breakfast before going to get ready.  </p><p>Juggling the girls while trying to get ready was crazy, both of them getting into everything.  They finally resorted to sticking them in their activity chairs just to keep them in one place. </p><p> Vic pulled up right on time.  The car was packed and the girls were in their seats by then so they hit the road.  </p><p>“Thanks for doing this,” Maya said to Vic. </p><p> “Of course,” the younger firefighter said, nodding. </p><p> They met up with Andrew at the airport, Maya and Carina opting to wear the babies because they were going to be checking the car seats. </p><p> “Ready?” Maya asked after they got the bags checked.  </p><p>“Let’s do this,” Carina nodded.  </p><p>Luckily, the girls were both sound asleep at the moment and they made it through security without much fuss. </p><p> “You two are killing it,” Andrew said, shaking his head as they walked to their gate, “I would think you two have traveled with these two before.” </p><p> “Let’s see if their impressively good behavior continues on the flight,” Maya said, looking down at Nora who was just starting to wake up on her chest, “Hi beautiful girl.  Did you have a nice nap?”</p><p>  Nora just stuck her fingers in her mouth, laying back against Maya’s chest.  The three of them went to their gate, having about a half an hour before boarding.  </p><p>“I’m going to go change Nora,” Maya said, looking down at the little girl who was now more awake.  </p><p>“Sounds good,” Carina nodded, “When you get back, I’ll do Rowan.”  </p><p>“Or, you both can go and I will stay with your stuff,” Andrew said, looking at his sisters.</p><p>  “Grazie Andrea,” Carina said, getting up and going with Maya to the bathroom.  </p><p>Soon enough, the babies were changed, both Maya and Carina had used the bathroom, and they were back at their gate.  They kept the girls in their carriers while they waited, both of them seemingly content to be snuggled up to their moms.  Rowan babbled some to Carina and Andrew who was sitting next to her. </p><p> They were in the first boarding group because they had two infants, and they quickly found their seats in first class.  Carina had insisted they fly first class always when they flew to Italy because the flights were so long and now with babies, thinking of flying that far holding a baby in a regular seat sounded like a literally nightmare.  They sat down, taking off their carriers and sitting the girls in their laps.  </p><p>Both babies were happy and smiled at everyone that walked past, Nora waving at a few people, a skill she had picked up in the past week or so.  Everyone commented on how cute the girls were, some people asking if they were related and thinking it was even cuter that they were twins. </p><p> Finally, the plane was full and both the girls were starting to get fussy because they were hungry.   However, they wanted to wait to give them milk until they were taking off to try to help their little ears.  </p><p>Maya pulled out some cheerios, giving them to Nora while Carina gave Rowan some puffs.  That seemed to be enough to satisfy the girls for a little while and as the plane started moving, Maya pointed out the window. </p><p> “Look Nora,” she said, “We are about to start flying.”  </p><p>As Nora stood with her hands on the window, Maya pulled out a bottle, adding the powdered formula before shaking it up, getting it ready for takeoff.  She looked over, seeing Rowan standing on Carina’s lap, laughing at Zio Andrea who was sitting in the seat behind them. </p><p> Soon enough, they were heading down the runway, Carina starting to nurse Rowan while Maya popped the bottle into Nora’s mouth.  </p><p>As they took off, Nora started fussing, spitting out her bottle and just crying.  </p><p>“It’s ok,” Maya soothed, trying to get the bottle back into her mouth, “I know, it feels weird.  You are going to be ok.”  </p><p>Nora let Maya put the bottle back in her mouth after two minutes of crying, settling into her chest, one hand pulling on her ear. </p><p> “I know it hurts,” Maya said, leaning down and kissing Nora’s forehead, “It will feel better soon.”  </p><p>Once they reached cruising altitude, Nora seemed to be a little calmer, looking out the window.  </p><p>“Is she ok?” Carina asked Maya as the blonde looked over at her. </p><p> “Yeah,” Maya nodded, “I think she just didn’t like the ear popping.  How is Ro?” </p><p> “She’s good,” Carina said, nodding.  </p><p>About an hour later, both babies fell asleep against their moms.  The flight was fairly uneventful.  Both girls were happy when they woke up and liked all the cuddling with their moms.  They got to JFK, Maya and Carina changing the twins into pajamas for their long flight to Rome. </p><p> “This is going to be a long flight,” Maya said with a sigh as Rowan bounced on her lap. </p><p> “Maybe they will sleep,” Carina said hopefully, pulling out two packet for food they used when they were in a pinch, handing one to Nora, “It’s almost 5 pm in Seattle, by the time we take off, it will be bedtime.”  </p><p>“Maybe,” Maya nodded, smiling as Andrew walked over with three cups of something.  </p><p>“I got everyone some hot chocolate,” he said, handing a cup to each of them, “I wanted coffee, but it’s too late for that so I figured this was the next best thing.”  </p><p>“Grazie,” Carina said, taking a sip. </p><p> They chatted a little, multiple people coming up and talking at the girls, asking Maya and Carina questions about them.  </p><p>“They’re twins,” Maya said as one older woman asked how old they were.  </p><p>“Oh, are they yours?” she said in a think Italian accent, pointing to Maya and Andrew. </p><p> “No,” Carina said, pointing between herself and Maya, “They are ours.”  </p><p>“Lesbiche?” the woman said, facial expressions changing from smile to hard, brow furrowed, “Sacrilego.” </p><p> She then turned and walked away, leaving Maya and Carina in shock.  </p><p>“I will go…” Andrew said, starting to get up to chase after the lady before Carina grabbed his arm. </p><p> “Sit back down,” Carina said, shaking her head, “It’s fine.”  </p><p>“No it’s not,” Andrew said, shaking his head. </p><p> “You’re right,” Maya said, “It’s not, but causing a scene never helps anything.  This is not the first time something like that has happened, and it won’t be the last.  People are ignorant and stupid and bigots.”  </p><p>“You guys deal with that a lot?” Andrew said, looking between them.  </p><p>“Not a lot,” Carina said, shrugging, “But a few times a year, si.  Less often in Seattle, but it does happen from time to time.”  </p><p>“That sucks,” Andrew said, sitting back in his chair, having not even thought about the fact that this was something two of his favorite people had to deal with.  </p><p>“Just forget about it,” Carina said, turning her attention back to Nora.  </p><p>The rest of the layover was uneventful and soon enough, they were on the plane again.  They fed both the babies as they took off again, and Nora fell asleep quickly.  Maya looked over, seeing Carina fighting sleep while Rowan bounced in her lap. </p><p> “Car,” Maya said, “Trade with me.  Take Nora and sleep.  I’ll take Rowan and when she falls asleep, I’ll sleep.”  </p><p>“You didn’t sleep last night,” Carina said, “You should get some sleep.” </p><p> “I will,” Maya said, “When Rowan decides to fall asleep, I’ll sleep too. I’m too wound up to sleep right now anyways.”</p><p> “Fine,” Carina said, getting up, handing Rowan to Maya before taking Nora.  </p><p>Carina crashed pretty quickly after that while Rowan just babbled and bounced in Maya’s lap.  </p><p>“Ro, it’s almost 10 pm at home,” Maya said sleepily, “You need to go to sleep.” </p><p> Finally, around 11, Rowan curled up on Maya’s chest, falling asleep.  It took Maya another hour to fall asleep, meaning that she only got about two hours of sleep before they had to get ready to land.  Luckily, Rowan and Nora both stayed asleep through landing and getting off the plane.  </p><p>“Bambina,” Carina said, looking at her wife, “Are you alright?”  </p><p>“I didn’t get much sleep on the plane,” Maya said, “And my body is feeling it.  I’ll be ok.” </p><p> “I’ll go get everyone coffee,” Andrew offered.  </p><p>“Thanks Andrew,” Maya said, nodding as he left. </p><p> “We have nothing planned when we get in,” Carina said, leaning over and kissing Maya’s cheek, “You can take a nap and we can all just relax all day.”  </p><p>“We need to try to adjust to Sicilian time,” Maya said, leaning her head on Carina’s shoulder.</p><p> “Bambina, you haven’t slept in days,” Carina said, shaking her head, “You need to rest.”  </p><p>Maya just shrugged, looking down at Rowan who was still out cold.  </p><p>“By the time we get there and get settled, it will be close to 4 pm in Sicily,” Maya said, “I can last until 9.  It’ll be fine.” </p><p> Andrew was back within ten minutes with coffee, Maya sighing as she took a long sip.  They got on their next flight, Maya and Carina both incredibly happy that the babies were still sleeping as they took off for the short flight to Sicily. </p><p> Just before they landed, Nora woke up, letting out a little cry before realizing she was in Carina’s arms, simply popping her fingers into her mouth and cuddling close.  </p><p>After they landed, Rowan’s eyes popped open too. </p><p> “Welcome to Italia, Patatina,” Maya smiled down at her daughter, “Mamma is so excited that we are here with you.” </p><p> Rowan fussed a little, clearly not enjoying where she had woken up.  </p><p>“It’s ok,” Maya said as they got up to deplane, “We will get you some food soon.”  </p><p>They got off the plane, heading down to baggage claim as soon as they made it through customs.  While Andrew grabbed the bags, Carina found a bench to nurse Rowan and Maya joined her, feeling Nora.  </p><p>“Alright,” Andrew said, bringing the last bags over to them, “Whenever you guys are ready, I’ll go grab us a cab.”  </p><p>“You could probably get one now,” Carina said, “They’re almost done.  By the time it’s loaded, we will be ready.” </p><p> Andrew nodded, going out to get a cab.  He helped get the car seats and luggage in before everyone loaded up.  </p><p>“I know, Patatina,” Carina cooed as Rowan started to cry in her car seat, “We will be there soon and then you can get down and play.” </p><p> The little girl didn’t stop crying until they got to the hotel, clearly pissed about her current situation.  They had their car seat stroller with them for ease, but Maya pulled Rowan out of her seat once she was out of the car, trying to calm the baby down.  </p><p>“She’s probably exhausted and overwhelmed,” Maya said, “She didn’t sleep until like 11pm Seattle time last night, and currently at home, it’s barely time for them to be awake.” </p><p> “Poor baby,” Carina frowned as they got everything into the hotel.  </p><p>Once they were checked in, they headed to their rooms, Andrew in one directly next to Maya and Carina. </p><p> “You better hope the walls are thick,” Maya said, looking at the younger man. </p><p> “Oh, come on,” Andrew said, “I do not want to hear you two enjoying your vacation.”</p><p>  “That’s not what she’s talking about,” Carina said, shaking her head, “The girls are going to be up all night with the time change and they are loud.” </p><p> “Oh,” Andrew said, blushing a little, so used to his sister talking about sex that he didn’t even think of his nieces being up, “Yeah.”  </p><p>Maya smiled, rolling her eyes as they each went into their rooms.  As soon as they were in the door, Maya set Rowan down, letting the baby crawl around for the first time in almost 24 hours.  Carina got Nora down too, both girls clearly happy to be out.  </p><p>“You need to sleep,” Carina said, looking at her wife.  </p><p>“I should try to adjust to Italy time,” Maya said, shaking her head. </p><p> “Maya, you have barely slept in three days,” Carina said, “I know you aren’t feeling well because of it.  Sleep.”  </p><p>“Carina, I’m ok,” Maya said, shaking her head, “Let’s unpack.”  </p><p>Carina sighed, but knew better than to argue with Maya when it came to sleep.  They got their things put away, trying to keep the girls from pulling out all the cords. </p><p> “Andrea wants to know if we want to go out and get pizza,” Carina called to Maya who was in the bathroom.  </p><p>“Sure,” Maya called back, washing her hands before coming out to her wife. </p><p> They got ready, opting to wear the girls instead of use the stroller.  They walked down to the lobby, hand in hand, finding Andrew waiting for them. </p><p> “Come on,” he said, smiling at them.  </p><p>The girls were facing out, able to see everything around them.  They made it to the restaurant quickly, Maya and Carina laughing a little when they realized both babies had fallen asleep.  </p><p>They ordered pizza and wine, Andrew and Carina chatting expressively, Maya interjecting occasionally.  Carina noticed something was off with her wife, but waited until Andrew excused himself to use the bathroom before asking her about it. </p><p> “What’s wrong, bambina?” Carina said, “You barely touched your dinner and you’ve been quiet.”  </p><p>“I don’t feel well,” Maya said, tears filling her eye that she desperately tried to blink away, “It’s just from traveling and being tired, but I just feel terrible and the pizza is making me feel nauseous and I should have listened to you and just taken a nap.” </p><p>“Oh, Bambina,” Carina said, wiping a tear off her cheek, “We can go back to the hotel and you can sleep.  You need to rest.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, getting the tears off her cheeks.  Andrew came back a minute later. </p><p> “Let’s call it a night,” Carina said, “We are all tired.” </p><p> “Ok,” Andrew said, nodding. </p><p> They paid before walking back to their hotel, Andrew going to his room while Carina and Maya went to theirs.  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, carefully taking the sleeping baby off her chest, laying her in one of the cribs in their room, “Shower and then sleep?”</p><p>  Maya nodded, pulling out a pair of pajamas.  It was barely 6 pm in Sicily, but all of them clearly needed sleep.  After a quick, but efficient shower for both of them, Maya and Carina climbed into bed.  </p><p>“Sleep, Bambina,” Carina said, rubbing Maya’s back as the blonde finally gave into sleep.  </p><p>Unfortunately, the babies did not get the memo about sleeping and were both up and hollering an hour and a half later.  </p><p>“They’re probably hungry,” Maya groaned as she sat up.  </p><p>“Lay back down,” Carina said, getting up, “I will take care of them.”  </p><p>“I can help,” Maya said, forcing her body out of bed, picking up Rowan while Carina got Nora. </p><p> Both babies were clearly out of sorts, much fussier than they normally were when they woke up. </p><p> “We need food for them,” Maya said, looking in their bag and realizing they didn’t have much left.  </p><p>“I will run out after I nurse Rowan,” Carina said, yawning a little before shushing a still very fussy Nora. </p><p> Maya quickly whipped up a bottle while Carina started feeding Rowan, grabbing her phone.  </p><p>“Andrea texted and asked if we need anything,” she said, looking over at Maya who was trying to get Nora to take her bottle, the baby pushing it away and fussing, “Is it wrong that I want to send him out for groceries so we don’t have to?”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, shaking her head, “Make him go.  We have two fussy babies.”  </p><p>“True,” Carina said, texting her brother a list of what they needed for the girls.  </p><p>“What’s wrong Piccola?” Maya asked, the baby again refusing the bottle, “Is this jet lag thing kicking your butt too?  I understand.  I feel pretty bad too, but if you have some milk, it might help.”  </p><p>Nora just pushed her bottle away, curling up against Maya’s chest, still crying.  </p><p>“Oh, sweet girl,” Maya said, rubbing her back, “It’s ok.  You’ll feel better soon.”  </p><p>“Poor Nora,” Carina frowned, reaching over and rubbing the baby’s back. </p><p> Nora just cried, Maya getting up and walking around the room.  Honestly, she was feeling miserable so she couldn’t imagine how her 10 month old daughter was feeling.  Maya tried singing to Nora as they paced, hoping maybe the little girl would calm down. </p><p> However, the more she walked, the worse Maya felt so she eventually ended up sitting back down in the bed, still trying to rock Nora.  </p><p>“Are you alright?”  Carina asked, reaching over and rubbing Maya’s back. </p><p> “I will be,” Maya nodded, “Just nauseous like always after long traveling.  I’m wondering if that’s what’s bothering Nora too.”  </p><p>Just then, Nora cried a little louder before having a massive blow out.  </p><p>“Oh, Piccola,” Maya groaned, “Is that what was bothering you?” </p><p> Nora just fussed, rubbing at her little eyes.  </p><p>“I’ll get you changed,” Maya said, taking a deep breath. </p><p> “I’ve got her,” Carina said, finishing up with Rowan, “Take Rowan.  You are not looking great right now.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, switching babies with Carina.  Rowan was also very fussy, trying to get comfortable on Maya but seemingly unable to. </p><p> “They are both so miserable,” Carina frowned, shaking her head, “Maybe this was a mistake.” </p><p> “They’re just tired,” Maya said, rubbing Rowan’s back, “And they don’t feel good.  It’ll get better.  We are here for two weeks for a reason.  So we have a few rough days at the beginning, and then we have at least 10 days to spend exploring and seeing family and enjoying ourselves.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, putting clean pajamas on Nora before bringing her back to the bed, taking the bottle  and trying it again.  This time, Nora took her bottle, clearly her tummy feeling at least a little better. </p><p> “Do you think they’ll sleep for us tonight?” Maya asked, Rowan still crying a little. </p><p> “Hopefully,” Carina said, wiping a tear off Nora’s cheek, “They are exhausted.” </p><p> “We don’t have plans tomorrow right?” Maya said, rubbing Rowan’s back. </p><p> “No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “I was thinking we could go to the park that is down the street if we are feeling up to it, but if everyone is still miserable, we can just stay here.”  </p><p>About half an hour later, both babies were still cranky and not settling down when Andrew knocked on their door. </p><p> “Thank you so much,” Carina said, letting him in.  </p><p>“Are the girls alright?” Andrew asked, hearing the crying from the bedroom and seeing how cranky Nora looked on Carina’s hip. </p><p> “They are having a hard time with the time change,” Carina sighed, “No one is feeling very well tonight.  Hopefully, they will fall asleep.  I want to try to give them something to eat, although Nora’s tummy has been upset tonight so we will see.”  </p><p>“So they take after Maya when it comes to traveling then,” Andrew said, knowing his siter-in-law struggled with time changes and long travel days.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, “She is also pretty miserable tonight.”  </p><p>“Do you want me to take the girls for a few hours so you guys can rest?” Andrew asked, “I got good sleep on the plane.”  </p><p>“Grazie, Andrea,” Carina said, “But when they get overtired, they do not like people besides us.”  </p><p>“Well, let me know if you guys need anything else,” Andrew said, putting the food in the fridge, “Hopefully they sleep for you.” </p><p> “Grazie Andrea,” Carina said as her brother left. </p><p> Carina grabbed a banana and some crackers from what her brother had bought, bringing it into the bedroom where Rowan was finally calming down a little.  </p><p>“I have some food for them,” Carina said, handing half the banana to Rowan.  </p><p>The baby took it, taking a bite.</p><p>  “Is that good, Ro?” Maya asked, turning the little girl so she was sitting up in her lap. </p><p> “Do you want to eat anything?” Carina asked as Nora took a bite of her banana. </p><p> “No,” Maya said, shaking her head, “I’m debating taking some Pepto, but other than that and water, I don’t think I could stomach anything else tonight.” </p><p> “Sorry you feel bad,” Carina frowned, leaning over and giving Maya a small kiss. </p><p> “I’ll be ok,” Maya said, putting her head on her wife’s shoulder. </p><p>After the babies finished eating, Carina gave them a quick bath, just to get all the grim of traveling off them, Maya taking Rowan from her after only about 3 minutes, the baby in a mess of tears which was very abnormal for the little girl who normally loved baths.  </p><p> It took the twins another two hours to fall asleep, and they only stayed asleep for about four hours before waking up again, fussy, grumpy, and in need of being held.  </p><p>“I can take them out to the living room so you can sleep,” Carina said, looking over at Maya. </p><p> “I’m ok,” Maya said, shaking her head.</p><p>  The twins went back down after another two hours, and luckily the next time they woke up, it was almost 8 am. </p><p> “We need to get up for the day,” Maya moaned, rubbing her eyes as Carina got up, grabbing the girls, “We need to try to shake this jet lag.”  </p><p>“How are you feeling this morning?” Carina asked as Maya got out of bed, picking up Nora.  </p><p>“Better than last night,” Maya said, smiling as Nora laid her head down on her shoulder, sticking her fingers in her mouth, “Still not great, but less like I might throw up.”  </p><p>“Good,” Carina smiled, “Well, I was thinking I could run out and grab us some breakfast and then we can decide what to do from there?  After I feed Rowan, obviously.”  </p><p>“Sounds good to me,” Maya nodded, opening the blinds, knowing sunlight was a good way to work on getting their internal clocks to reset.  </p><p>Once the girls had had some milk, Carina headed out to a bakery to grab some breakfast and coffee while Maya played with the girls.  </p><p>After some breakfast, they got dressed and decided to go out for a little while before the twins’ morning nap.  They texted Andrew to see if he wanted to join them, but he had plans with a friend so the family headed out just the 4 of them.  The girls were much more awake this morning, both of them kicking happily in their carriers, cooing and babbling.  </p><p>“I think they like it here,” Maya smiled as Nora laughed at a woman walking a dog. </p><p> “They are smart babies,” Carina smiled, taking Maya’s hand in hers. </p><p> For Carina, it felt like a dream, walking around a park she had spent time in as a kid with her own daughters and wife.  There was a large portion of Carina’s life before Maya where she thought having a family just wasn’t in the cards for her, that she was too broken and damaged.  The last time they had been here, they had been engaged but hadn’t opened the possibility of having kids. </p><p> Looking down at the blonde haired baby strapped to her chest and over at her wife and other daughter, Carina felt overwhelmed with emotions.  </p><p>“Hey,” Maya said, looking up and seeing the tears in Carina’s eyes, “What’s wrong?”  </p><p>“Nothing is wrong,” Carina said, wiping a tear from her eye, “Quite the opposite actually.  I was just thinking about being here as a bambina and how I wish that little girl could see how lucky she would grow up to be.”  </p><p>Maya smiled, leaning up and planting a kiss on Carina’s lips, feeling her own eyes get misty.  They walked around the park for a little bit, taking the girls out of their carriers and holding their tiny hands, helping them practice walking around in the park.  </p><p>After about an hour, Rowan started getting fussy so they started back to the hotel.  As soon as they got back, they changed the girls before laying them down to sleep in the bedroom before going out into the living room to hang out.  </p><p>“You can nap too, if you need to,” Carina said as Maya yawned.  </p><p>“I’m ok,” Maya said, shaking her head, “I need to keep my normal schedule if I’m going to feel better any time soon.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, knowing her wife was right.  The rest of the day was a little rough.  </p><p>Rowan was in some kind of mood when she woke up from her nap, not happy on the floor but also not happy in either Maya or Carina’s arms and she cried for close to an hour, completely inconsolable before she finally calmed down in Carina’s arms.</p><p>“I’m sorry this is so hard Ro Ro,” Maya said, leaning over and kissing the baby’s cheek.  </p><p>Rowan just sighed, still agitated, but out of energy to yell about it.  They spend the rest of the afternoon and evening in their room, just trying to help both girls adjust to everything.  </p><p>Carina ordered some pasta for dinner which the twins were crazy about, causing both moms to laugh as they tried to feed them fast enough to avoid the squawks from the babies. </p><p> Maya opted to just eat a banana and some yogurt Andrew had brought the day before, still not feeling very well. </p><p> By 8, the entire family was passed out.  The girls didn’t do much better this night though, spending long stretches of time wide awake in the middle of the night.  </p><p>The following day, Carina’s jet lag started kicking her butt too and they spend much of the morning in their room, the babies fussy and the parents exhausted.  They went to the pool that afternoon, enjoying time in the sun, both babies loving the water. </p><p> By their fourth night there, the girls only woke up once and only stayed awake for an hour, much to Maya and Carina’s relief.  Maya was also feeling better, and Carina was too, forever grateful that she her body adjusted to time changes quickly, and they were finally ready to start enjoying their Italian vacation.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  I based their jet lag experience on one I had when I traveled to Ghana a few years ago, except mine lasted like 10 days which was kinda miserable.  Anyway, the next one or two chapters are going to be their time in Italy.  If there's anything you'd like to see them do, let me know.  Or any other ideas! It's Station/Grey's night, and for literally the first time every, I think I get to watch Station 19 live if I get off work on time!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0022"><h2>22. Family and Friends</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So writing this has felt a lot harder in the past week week because of how sad and heartbreaking the show has been, but I hope you like this!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>On their fourth day, they had plans to meet two of Carina’s old co-workers who were also married and had a four year old.  Maya had met Stefano and Gia the last time she was in Italy along with their son Mateo who at the time was a baby.  </p><p>They walked to the park, Carina looking around for her friends.</p><p>  “There they are,” Carina said, guiding Maya over to where her friends were by a little playground.  </p><p>“Ciao Bella,” Gia called, standing up and walking towards her friend. </p><p> “Gia,” Carina smiled before noticing the obvious baby bump on her friend, “Sei Incinta?”  </p><p>“Si,” Gia smiled, giving Carina a hug, “Quattro mesi.  And these are your figlie?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, pulling back the sunshades from the car seats where both girls were sleeping, “Gia, Stefano, this is Rowan Andrea and Elenora Mason, Nora.”</p><p>  “They are even more beautiful in person,” Gia said, “And Maya, nice to see you again.”  </p><p>“You too Gia,” Maya smiled as the pregnant Italian gave her a hug.  </p><p>“Come,” Stefano said, “Mateo is playing.”  </p><p>The four of them sat and chatted for a little while, Mateo running over when he saw that Carina and Maya were there, excitedly telling them in Italian about the baby in his mom’s tummy, Carina translating for Maya, although the blonde could figure out about 80% of what the little boy was talking about.    </p><p>After about an hour, the twins both woke up and wanted out.  Their moms happily obliged, Maya holding Rowan’s hands while she practiced toddling around the playground while Carina pushed Nora in a swing, chatting with Gia.  Stefano chased Mateo around, talking with Maya as he did so.</p><p>  The four of them talked often on facetime, although now that they all had kids, it was tricky. </p><p> “So how is the new job Maya?” Stefano asked as Mateo ran up the steps to the slide. </p><p> “Good,” Maya said, “The hours are much better for having a family, and I enjoy the work, even if the paperwork is boring sometimes.  How is your work going?  I think you told us you were about to start some new research?”  </p><p>“Si,” Stefano said, nodding, “Into a better stem cell transplant protocol.  It has had some promising preliminary results.”  </p><p>Stefano was a hematologist/oncologist and Gia a pediatric surgeon.  Gia was one year ahead of Carina in their residency and Stefano a year behind, but the three of them had been incredibly close.  </p><p>Maya and Stefano chatted a little more before Mateo came running up, motioning for his papa to bend down.  Stefano obliged and the little boy whispered in his ear. </p><p> “Si,” Stefano said, nodding, “di a tua mama.” </p><p> Mateo grinned and ran off.  </p><p>“He wants to know is it’s time for lunch,” Stefano said, seeing Maya’s confused look.  </p><p>“Oh,” Maya said, “Yeah, I guess it is.” </p><p> Soon enough, they were all at a little pizzeria that was a favorite spot of the trio during their time working together. </p><p> “I think it’s time the girls had their first taste of pizza in Italy,” Carina said, sitting Nora in her lap.  </p><p>“You have been here four days and haven’t had pizza yet?” Stefano said, eyes wide.  </p><p>“We did our first evening here,” Carina nodded, “But the girls fell asleep and everyone has been having a hard time with the time changes so eating has been not great. They did have some pasta ‘ncasciata which we could not feed them fast enough.”  </p><p>“They are Italian,” Gia said, “A love for pasta is in their blood.” </p><p> Mateo was sitting between Stefano and Maya, who had Rowan on her lap, and the little boy was having a blast talking to the baby, trying to make her laugh with his funny faces and voices.  </p><p>“He is going to be an amazing big brother,” Maya said, smiling as Rowan giggled before reaching out and bopping Mateo’s nose.  </p><p>“Si,” Gia said, nodding, “He is so excited for this baby.  He is counting the days until she comes.”  </p><p>“It’s a girl?” Carina asked, catching her friends slip.  </p><p>“Si,” Gia said, “We haven’t really told anyone yet, but we are having a bambina.”  </p><p>“Congratulations,” Maya and Carina said at the same time.  </p><p>Soon enough, their food was there.  Maya and Carina each cut a small piece of the pizza for the babies to chew on, watching as they put it in their mouths.  Rowan was always the better eater and immediately starting chewing/gumming the pizza while Nora was a bit more timid, tasting a little bit at first before realizing it was good and eating it.  </p><p>“I think it’s safe to say they are at least half Italian,” Carina laughed as she wiped sauce off Nora’s face, the baby grabbing for more food.  </p><p>The rest of their time with Gia, Stefano, and Mateo was nice.  They walked around a little before stopping and getting some gelato, another treat the girls apparently loved.  They hadn’t had a ton of sugar up to this point because they were so young, but this was a special trip to a special place.  Soon, Mateo was getting grumpy and the twins were tired too.</p><p>  “It was so good to see you both,” Carina said, hugging her friends, “We will see you next week at Giovanni’s engagement party?”  </p><p>“Si,” Gia said, giving Carina and Maya both hugs, “It was good to see you both and finally meet your girls.”  </p><p>“Ciao,” Carina called as they headed out.  </p><p>Once they were back to the hotel, they put the girls into their cribs before going to relax on the couch.  </p><p>“It was good to see them in person,” Carina said as she yawned.  </p><p>“It was,” Maya nodded, “I always forget how much I like your friends from here.”  </p><p>Carina put her head on Maya’s shoulder, exhaustion hitting her hard and fast.  </p><p>“Go take a nap,” Maya said, kissing her temple.  </p><p>“I don’t want to get up,” Carina mumbled sleepily and Maya move and adjusted them so Carina was laying in her lap.  </p><p>The two of them just sat there, Carina dozing while Maya checked her emails.  The girls woke up an hour and a half later, and they just played with them in their room before joining Andrew for dinner.  </p><p>“How were Gia and Stefano?” Andrew asked as they walked down the street toward a deli where they were going to grab sandwiches before going to the park to eat. </p><p> “Good,” Carina said, “They are having another baby.”  </p><p>Once they had their food, they went to a park, sitting down.  </p><p>“So tomorrow we are having lunch with Zia Sofia and Zio Francesco,” Carina said as she fed Nora a bit of cheese, “And then a bigger family get together tomorrow night.” </p><p> “I’m not going to lunch tomorrow,” Andrew said, shaking his head, “Remember, I told you I have plans with Marco and Leonardo tomorrow.  I already talked to Zia and told her we would all be there tomorrow night.”  </p><p>“I forgot,” Carina nodded, looking at Maya, “Are you still feeling up to all of that?”</p><p>  “I think so,” Maya nodded, taking a bite, “But the next day, we don’t have any plans, right?”  </p><p>“Correct,” Carina nodded, “We can just take it easy.” </p><p> Maya nodded, glad she and Carina had talked about this before they came this time.  They finished dinner, Andrew walking with Nora holding his hands a little while Rowan cuddled with Maya. </p><p> “This,” Carina said, watching Andrew pick Nora up and throw her in the air, the baby laughing, “Is everything I never dreamed of.  Thank you for making us take this trip.” </p><p> “Of course,” Maya said, taking Carina’s hand, “This is your home.  It is important to show the girls, even if they are too little to remember it, and it is important for your family to meet them.  They don’t get to have much of my family, but you have a big, beautiful family here, and it is important for them to know where they come from.”  </p><p>“Ti amo,” Carina smiled, leaning over and kissing Maya gently, Rowan squealing a little. </p><p> “I love you too, Patatina,” Carina laughed, tickling Rowan a little, the baby laughing.  </p><p>The three of them went and joined Andrew who was showing Nora the pond.  They walked around for a little while before going back to their apartment, Maya and Carina bathing the girls before getting them ready for bed.  </p><p>“You two need to get good sleep tonight,” Carina said as she put Rowan down, “Tomorrow, you get to meet lots of people who are very excited that you are here.” </p><p> “See you in the morning,” Maya said as they both kissed the babies before slipping out into the living room.  </p><p>“How are you feeling about going to see my family tomorrow?” Carina asked, wrapping her arms around Maya. </p><p> “Eh,” Maya shrugged, “I mean, I love your Zia Sofia, and Carlo and Betto and Ari and Elena are all fun.  There are just a lot of them and they are loud.  I will be fine.  I love your family.  I really do. And I am feeling much better this time because we’ve been here more than two days.” </p><p> “Well, if it gets to be too much, you just have to tell me,” Carina said, pressing a kiss to Maya’s lips.  </p><p>“Thank you for being so amazingly understanding,” Maya said, smiling at her wife.  </p><p>They spent some time just talking and enjoying their uninterrupted time alone before heading off to bed.  </p><p>Unfortunately for them, Rowan decided she wasn’t quite on Sicilian time, and Maya spent four hours up with her.  Carina offered to take her more than once, but Maya was having a hard time sleeping herself so she just sat up with her, the little girl unsettled and fussy. </p><p> Nora joined them from 1-2 am, but then she went back down.  </p><p>Finally, around 4 am, Maya got Rowan to sleep before crawling into bed.  </p><p>At 7, Nora woke up crying and before either mom could get her, Rowan was awake too.  </p><p>“She is going to be a mess today,” Maya groaned as she picked Rowan up, the little girl crying hysterically. </p><p> “Maybe she will just sleep all day?” Carina said, taking Rowan who was looking for breakfast.  </p><p>“We’ll see,” Maya said, getting a bottle for Nora, “She’s not going to want anyone else to hold her though.” </p><p> “I know,” Carina sighed, sitting down to nurse Rowan, “Good thing we have two babies, one of whom decided to actually sleep most of the night last night.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, sitting down with Nora and her bottle.  Rowan fell asleep nursing, something that almost never happened.  Carina carefully put her in her bed before sneaking out of the bedroom where Nora and Maya were already playing in the living room.  </p><p>“I’m going to get her dressed,” Carina said, “My Zia Elisa sent us those little dresses, and she will be very unhappy if they don’t wear them today.”  </p><p>“Maybe we should wait and dress them later, right before we leave, just in case,” Maya said, rubbing her tired eyes.</p><p>  “Good idea,” Carina nodded, smiling as Nora crawled over to Maya, climbing in her lap, “Well, I don’t know about you, but I need coffee.”  </p><p>“Yes,” Maya said, “The strongest coffee you can find, please.”  </p><p>“I will be back soon,” Carina said, giving Maya and Rowan a quick kiss before leaving. </p><p> Carina brought back breakfast and coffee, Rowan waking up not long after in a terrible mood.  </p><p>“Oh, Patatina,” Carina said, bouncing the little girl, “It’s ok.”  </p><p>Rowan settled down eventually, just in time for Nora to need her morning nap.  After Nora woke up, it was time to get ready to go, Maya and Carina going through their normal juggling of watching babies and getting ready. </p><p> “Alright,” Carina said, going to the drawer, “They have to wear these today.”  </p><p>“Not my favorite outfits,” Maya said, shaking her head at the frilly white dresses with bows that Carina’s Zia Elisa had sent for the girls.  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, pulling the dress on Rowan, “But it will make her happy to see them wear them.  Every little girl in our family has had one of these dresses.” </p><p> “I know,” Maya nodded, scooping Nora’s dark hair into a pony tail on top of her head, “It’s fine.  I guess they look a little cute.  Just not my style.”  </p><p>“Mine either,” Carina said, putting a pair of shoes on Rowan, “But it’s just one day.”  </p><p>Maya made sure they had extra clothes in the diaper bag, knowing white mixed with ten month olds was not a great combination.  They usually dressed the girls in neutral earth tones, and dresses were not part of their regular outfits at this age because they got stuck on them when they were crawling.  </p><p>“Ready?” Carina asked as Maya held Rowan who was still fussy and probably needed another nap.  “I guess,” Maya said, biting her lip, “I just… I don’t know…I think I’m a little more anxious than I thought I was going to be.” </p><p> “Oh, bambina,” Carina said, guiding Maya to the couch, deciding this was worth being a few minutes late for, “It is going to be fine.  I know your lack of sleep is probably not making any of this easier, but my family really is excited to see us.  If this is too much, we can leave.  Rowan gave us the perfect excuse because she is going to be fussy.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, Carina wrapping her arm around her, just offering her some reassurance.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, taking a deep breath, “Let’s do this.”  </p><p>They opted to bring the stroller and the carriers, not sure what would be best for the girls today.  Nora went in the stroller, but Rowan would not let Maya put her down so Maya just put a baby carrier on, hoping she would fall asleep.  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, grabbing the diaper bag, “Let’s go.”  </p><p>They were walking to meet Carina’s aunt and uncle because the place they were meeting them was not too far.  </p><p>“Carina,” Zia Sofia called as they walked up to the restaurant, “Maya.  Ciao! Oh, it is so good to see you both! And these must be your figlie.”  </p><p>“Ciao Zia Sofia,” Carina said, hugging her aunt, “And Zio Francesco.”  </p><p>Maya also gave them both a small hug, careful not to disturb the baby who was sleeping on her chest.  They went into the restaurant, Carina taking Nora out of her stroller so her aunt and uncle could see her, Nora smiling at them after a few minutes of warming up.  </p><p>“When I heard you named her Elenora, I think I cried for at least thirty minutes,” Zia Sofia said as she held the little girl, smiling at her, “Not a day goes by that I do not think about my big sister.”  </p><p>“Me too,” Carina smiled as she blinked tears out of her eyes watching her Zia with her daughter, thinking what it would be like if her mom was there with them.  </p><p>“She would have loved being a nonnina,” Zia Sofia said, kissing Nora’s cheek, “When you kids were young, we used to talk about what it would be like when you grew up and had children, and she was always so excited for it.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, looking up as she blinked, Maya squeezing her hand gently.  </p><p>“Not a day has gone by since they have been born that I have not though about how much my mamma would have loved getting to meet them,” Carina said, offering Zia Sofia a watery smile, “And I am glad they get to know you so they can have a piece of her.  And you too, Zio.  These babies are going to grow up without any nonninos, but you are like their nonnino.”  </p><p>“Grazie Carina,” Zio Francesco said, smiling at his favorite niece.  </p><p>Carina has spent a lot of time with her Zia Sofia and Zio Francesco when she was growing up, first because her mom and Sofia were extremely close and then because her dad was too unstable to actually help her with things she needed as a young girl. <br/> Her aunt and uncle had five kids, the second and third oldest, a set of twins Elena and Carlo, were Carina’s age, and the three of them were inseparable for many years.  Zia Sofia had been the one to help Carina through her first period and first breakup.  Zio Francesco had helped her through her applications for medical school and the humiliation that came with her father’s worst manic episodes.  The reason Carina was able to survive without her mom and brother was largely thanks to her zio and zia.  </p><p>“Sorry Rowan is asleep,” Maya said, looking down at the baby who was currently had one hand under her little head, her other hand clutching at Maya’s shirt, “She had a bit of a rough night.”  </p><p>“Oh, don’t worry about it, Bambina,” Zia Sofia said, “Time changes with little ones are hard.  I went with Carina’s mamma when she was about two on a trip to the US, and I think she was up every two hours at night for the first week we were there.”  </p><p>“So she hasn’t always been amazing at time changes,” Maya said, smiling at her wife. </p><p> “As a baby, no,” Zia Sofia laughed. </p><p> Lunch was calm until Rowan woke up angry as they were finishing.  </p><p>“I’m going to go take her outside,” Maya said as Rowan started wailing, “I’ll be back soon.” </p><p> Maya took Rowan out of the carrier, leaving it behind in favor of just holding her in her arms.  </p><p>“Are you having a hard day sweet girl?” Maya said as she walked down the street with Rowan, the little girl calming in the open air, “It’s ok.  Meeting Mamma’s family really stressed me out the first time too.  It still does, actually, but they mean well.  But I completely understand wanting to cry about it.”  </p><p>Rowan started to wake up a little more, seeming much less agitated as they headed back to the restaurant.  </p><p>“Alright,” Maya said, “Let’s go meet your Zia and Zio.”  </p><p>Maya walked back in, Carina smiling at them.  </p><p>“There you are Patatina,” the doctor said, “Are you ready for some food?”  </p><p>Rowan ate some pasta, still very clingy to both Maya and Carina.  After lunch, they went to a park, Nora sleeping in a carrier on Maya while Carina pushed Rowan in the stroller.  </p><p>“It’s almost time to go to Zia Elisa’s,” Carina said, looking at her watch, “Is Nora still asleep?” </p><p> “She’s just waking up,” Maya said, looking down as Nora’s eyes fluttered open, “Hi Piccola.  Did you sleep well?”  </p><p>Nora made a face, rubbing her eyes.  A few minutes later, Nora started fussing in the carrier, Maya pulling her out only to realize they had a big problem.  </p><p>“Um, Carina, how long before we have to be at Zia Elisa’s?” Maya asked. </p><p> “About twenty minutes wh… oh no,” Carina said, seeing the blow out that covered both Nora and Maya. </p><p> “Oh no,” Zia Sofia said, shaking her head, “You two go back to your hotel.  Get cleaned up.  Elisa will not care if you are late.”  </p><p>“Tell her we are sorry,” Carina said as they stood, knowing her Zia Elisa would, in fact, care very much if they were late, “We will be there soon.”  </p><p>“This is so gross,” Maya said, deciding to keep Nora in the carrier because it was the best way to contain the mess. </p><p> “You can shower while I give her a bath,” Carina said, shaking her head.  </p><p>They made it back to the hotel, Carina carefully taking off the white dress that was not irreprovably stained. </p><p> “I guess she hated this dress as much as we did,” Maya said, laughing as she pulled off her own messy clothes.  </p><p>Just as they were getting ready to go, Rowan threw up all over her dress.  </p><p>“Maybe this is a sign,” Maya said, carefully taking the white dress of Rowan, “Maybe we should just skip the family get together.”  </p><p>“Maya,” Carina sighed, “We brought them here to meet my family.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, cleaning Rowan up a little before putting on clean clothes, “I know.  Let’s go.”  </p><p>They headed back out the door.  Maya had been trying to shove down how anxious she was about this get together all day, but as they walked, she felt her heart start beating faster, the familiar tightness of anxiety filling her chest.  </p><p>“We don’t have to stay long,” Carina said, leaning over and giving Maya a gentle kiss on the cheek, sensing how anxious her wife was getting.  </p><p>“I’ll be fine,” Maya said, “We are here to spend time with your family.”</p><p>  They arrived at Elisa’s, almost twenty minutes late.  </p><p>“Carina, Maya, come in,” Carina’s cousin, Elena said, coming in, “Oh my goodness, your daughters are even cuter in person.”  </p><p>“Grazie,” Carina said, smiling. </p><p> “Come on,” Elena said, “Everyone has been waiting for you.” </p><p> They walked into the yard, Carina’s large family engulfing them.  Carina tried to stay by Maya, but they somehow ended up separated.  Carina ended up talking to some of her cousins, Nora getting passed around as they talked, the little girl tolerating the strangers much better than Carina had thought she would.  Carina was about to go find her wife when Andrew walked up to her.  </p><p>“I think you need to go find Maya,” he said, pulling Carina aside, “Zia Elisa was going on and on about how the girls weren’t wearing their special outfits and how Rowan was too clingy and that babies needed to be used to other people and a bunch of other stuff, and Maya tried to talked to her, but Zia was being her usual unreasonable self and when she finally left her alone, Maya went inside.  That was like 10 minutes ago.” </p><p> “Damn it,” Carina said with a sigh, “Um, can you keep an eye on Nora for me, and if she gets fussy, bring her to me.” </p><p> Andrew nodded as Carina turned to go inside. </p><p> “Maya,” Carina called as she knocked on the bathroom door, “Are you in there?”  </p><p>The door slowly opened, Maya standing there holding Rowan, both of them looking somewhat miserable.  </p><p>“Oh Bambina,” Carina said, going into the bathroom with them, “What’s wrong?” </p><p> “I’m fine,” Maya said, “Just needed some space.”  </p><p>“Did you have a panic attack?” Carina asked, seeing that Maya seemed off.  </p><p>Maya didn’t look at her, instead just looking down at Rowan.  </p><p>“Maya,” Carina said.  </p><p>Just then, there was another knock on the door.  </p><p>“Carina,” Andrew called, “Maya.” </p><p> “What Andrea?” Carina asked, opening the door, finding her brother standing there with a clearly upset Nora.  </p><p>“Sorry,” he said, seeing that there was clearly something going on, “She started fussing, and apparently Zio Andrea is not good enough.”  </p><p>“Grazie Andrea,” Carina said, the baby reaching for her, “Sorry.” </p><p> “Is there anything I can do?” Andrew asked.  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “Thank you.”  </p><p>“Let me know if you do,” Andrew said as Carina closed the door, heading back to Maya.  </p><p>“Bambina, we can go,” Carina said, “You are clearly miserable.”</p><p>  “I just needed a minute,” Maya said, holding Rowan close and breathing in her baby scent, trying to calm herself down, “I love your family.  I really do.  I don’t want to keep you from seeing them.”  </p><p>“Maya, my family is loud and nosy and a lot for me often and I grew up with them,” Carina said, putting a hand on Maya’s shoulder, “I need you to be very honest with me right now.  Do you want to leave?”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, “Not yet.  As long as I don’t have to talk to Zia Elisa anymore because no offense but she is crazy.” </p><p> “Oh, Mamma thought that too,” Carina laughed, “Even as a little girl, I remember my mom complaining about how her big sister tried to tell her how to raise Andrea and me.  They didn’t speak after Mamma moved to the US with Andrea.  I will protect you from her.” </p><p> “Thank you,” Maya said, smiling a little, “Alright.  I think I am good, but maybe, could we stay together out there?”  </p><p>“Of course,” Carina nodded, giving Maya a small kiss, “But first, we need to change some diapers.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, the two of them quickly got the girls into fresh diapers before going back out to join Carina’s family.  They spent the next two hours talking to cousins, aunts, and uncles, each of them taking turns with Rowan who was grumpy and mad at the world.  </p><p>Finally, after they couldn’t get her to calm down, they decided to leave after making plans to meet up with Elena and Carlo in a few days. </p><p> Rowan was in a full blown melt down by the time they were walking out, Zia Elisa tutting after them about how they needed to have better control over their children, and the only thing that stopped Carina from going off on her was Maya’s tight grip on her hand. </p><p> They left, Rowan settling a little bit as they walked, the rhythm calming her against Maya’s chest.  </p><p>“How are you feeling Bambina?” Carina asked as they walked in the cool night air.  </p><p>“Honestly,” Maya said, looking at her wife, “Exhausted.”  </p><p>“We can go back and you can go to sleep,” Carina said, “And if Rowan decides to party all night again, I will stay up.” </p><p> “I will probably let you,” Maya said, “I don’t think I realized how bad my anxiety about today was until now that it’s going away.” </p><p>“I am sorry my family is so hard for you,” Carina said as they walked into the hotel, “We are done with the big groups for the rest of the trip.” </p><p> “I love your family,” Maya said as they got to their room, “I truly do, but smaller doses is better.” </p><p> “I completely agree,” Carina nodded, “Even when I was young, big family gatherings always were stressful.  Elena and I used to go hid wherever it was quiet.”  </p><p>They got the girls ready for bed, Nora crying as Carina tried to nurse her.  </p><p>“She is such your daughter,” Carina said, shaking her head as she tried to coax Rowan into eating.  </p><p>“What does that mean?” Maya said as she gave Nora her bottle. </p><p> “She is unreasonable when she is overtired,” Carina said, finally getting Rowan to eat.  </p><p>Maya shook her head, not arguing because she knew her wife was right.  Rowan fell asleep while she was eating, Carina carefully transferring her into her crib while Maya read Nora a book before putting her down too.  </p><p>“I am going to go to bed too,” Maya said, yawning, “I know it’s early, but I feel like I got run over by a bus.”  </p><p>“Sleep, Bambina,” Carina said, “I am going to join you.  I am tired too.”  </p><p>Soon enough, the entire family was sound asleep, the exhaustion of dealing with family keeping them that way the entire night.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  I have one more chapter half planned for them in Italy and then it's back to the US for the Bishop-Deluca family.  I am considering ending this story at their first birthday, in like 3ish chapters, and then maybe doing some one-shots of them older.  I'm not sure yet, but what do you think?  Also, can we just take a minute to appreciate the amazing acting of both Stefania and Danielle in the last episode.  It was heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time.  Watching how much Maya has grown as a character and how much their relationship has grown is incredible.  Anyway, thank you for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos.  Also, if you have any Maria prompts either for this story or for other stuff you would like me to write, let me know!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0023"><h2>23. Meeting the Grandparents and Going Home</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So the second part of this is kinda similar to another chapter, but I decided it was different enough to go for it anyway.  I hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Today is a very important day,” Maya said as she changed Rowan’s diaper while Carina was in the shower, “You are going to go meet two very important people to Mamma.  Your Nonnina and Nonno.  You can’t actually see them, but we are going to go where they are buried.  It is very important to Mamma, and she might cry, but it’s ok.” </p><p> Rowan gurgled, babbling at Maya as she crawled over to the couch in just a diaper.  Maya smiled as she grabbed Nora, tickling the little girl before changing her too.  It had been two days since the family get together, and everyone was feeling much better. </p><p> Today their plans were to take the girls to the cemetery where Carina’s parents were buried and have a picnic.  Andrew was planning on joining as well.  Even though they were divorced, Elenora and Vincenzo Deluca were buried together which their children were grateful for.  </p><p>Maya pulled a pair of overalls on Rowan, trying to fix her hair a little as the baby crawled away.  She then got Nora dressed too, managing to get her hair up in two little pigtails before Carina came out of the bathroom.  </p><p>“They are quite busy this morning,” Maya said, shaking her head, “I could barely get Rowan dressed before she was off to go through the diaper bag.”  </p><p>“It’s almost time for them to nap,” Carina said, smiling as Nora crawled over to her, reaching up.  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, smiling as she watched Nora cuddle with Carina, sticking her fingers in her mouth, “Would you mind if I went out for a run while you put them down?  I can stay and help and get a short one in after if you want.” </p><p> “No,” Carina said, “You should go run.  You’ve only gone once since we got here.  I’ll get them down.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya smiled, getting up off the floor, “I won’t be long.  I just need to get some of this energy out.”  </p><p>“Just don’t get lost,” Carina said, laughing a little.  </p><p>Maya nodded, changing her clothes before heading out the door.  She didn’t get too far from their hotel, running laps through the park to make sure she knew where she was.  </p><p>On her cooldown lap, she stopped at a flower stand in the park, getting a bunch of sunflowers to take to Carina’s mom’s grave, remembering Carina said they were her favorites.  She also got some yellow and pink carnations for Carina, paying quickly before heading back to the hotel.  </p><p>She walked in the door about an hour after she left, finding Carina on the couch on her laptop.  </p><p>“Hey,” Maya said, both hands full of flowers behind her back.  </p><p>“Bambina,” Carina smiled, looking up from her work, “How was your run?” </p><p> “Good,” Maya said, smiling, “I have something for you.”  </p><p>“What?” Carina asked, getting up.  </p><p>“These are for you,” Maya said, handing the carnations to Carina, “And these are to take to your mom.”  </p><p>“Oh, Maya,” Carina smiled, tears pricking her eyes as she set the flowers down on the kitchen counter, wrapping her arms around her wife and giving her a kiss, “Thank you.”  </p><p>“Of course,” Maya smiled, giving Carina another kiss, “Now, I need to go shower before the babies wake up and we have to go.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina nodded, wiping her eyes, “I love you.” </p><p> “I love you too,” Maya said, stealing one more quick kiss before going into the bathroom. </p><p> By the time Maya was showered, dressed, and had her hair dry, the girls were just waking up from their naps. </p><p> After a quick bottle and diaper change, it was time to go.  Andrew met them outside their room as they headed out of the hotel.  </p><p>“You got sunflowers,” Andrew said, looking at his sister, “Good job, Carina.” </p><p> “It wasn’t me,” Carina said, shaking her head, “This time, it was all my beautiful wife.”  </p><p>“Wow,” Andrew said, looking impressed at Maya, “I’m surprised you remembered.”</p><p>  “I try to remember everything you guys tell me about your mom,” Maya shrugged, “She was important to you, and even though I will never meet her, I want to know her as much as I can.  She raised two incredible children, and I want ours to know as much about their nonnina as possible.”</p><p>Carina smiled at her wife, reaching to give her wife’s hand a squeeze as the blonde pushed the stroller.  They stopped at a deli, grabbing lunch before continuing to the cemetery.  They found the Deluca family plot, Andrew spreading out a large picnic blanket they borrowed from Elena.  </p><p>“Come here Piccola,” Carina said, picking Nora up out of the stroller, walking over to the gravestones, “Mamma, Papa, this is one of my daughters, Elenora Mason.” </p><p> Just then, Maya walked over with Rowan, knowing how important this moment was to Carina.  </p><p>“And this is Rowan Andrea,” Carina continued, “And you remember my wife Maya.  I wish you were here to meet them.  They are so perfect.” </p><p> Maya slipped her hand into Carina’s, squeezing it as a few tears ran down Carina’s cheeks.  After a minute, Carina wiped her tears.  </p><p>“Let’s go have lunch,” she said, looking at Maya.  </p><p>They turned back, finding that Andrew had everything set out.  </p><p>“Grazie Andrea,” Carina smiled as they sat down.  </p><p>“I know how important being here and having Mamma and Papa meet the girls is to you,” Andrew said, smiling at his big sister. </p><p> They ate together, Rowan and Nora crawling all over as they did.  At one point, Nora crawled over to the headstones, hitting the rocks.  Maya grabbed her phone, snapping a picture as the baby turned and looked at them with a big smile on her face.  </p><p>“I wish they could have met them,” Carina said, feeling tears fill her eyes again, “Mamma would have loved them so much, and Papa too when he was lucid enough.”  </p><p>“The girls will grow up knowing all about them,” Maya said, grabbing Rowan before she put a rock in her mouth, “But I wish they could have met in person too.”  </p><p>“One of the last things Mamma and I ever talked about was me having children,” Carina said, staring at the headstones, “She was on my case about when I was going to give her nipoti, that she was getting old and I was getting old and I needed to have kids, and I told her to leave me alone, that I didn’t think I ever wanted to have babies at that point, and I just wish she could be here now to get to be a nonnina, to meet the granddaughters she always wanted.” </p><p> “She’s looking down on us,” Andrew said, putting his hand on his sister’s back, “She might not get to physically be here, but she loved your daughters so much.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, wiping at her tears.  They spent a long time at the graveside, Maya taking pictures of Carina and the girls as Carina talked about her mom to them, knowing they were too little to understand but also that it was important to tell them.  </p><p>Eventually, the babies got fussy and needed another nap so they packed everything up, heading back to the hotel. </p><p> Once the twins were in their beds, Maya sat down on the couch, motioning for Carina to join her.  </p><p>“I am glad we got to take the girls to meet my parents today,” Carina said, settling into Maya’s arms, “Thank you.”  </p><p>“Don’t thank me,” Maya said, shaking her head, “It is so important that they know your parents.  Our families are really complicated, but it’s still important that the girls know about them, or most of them at least.” </p><p> “Some days, I am glad my dad never met the girls,” Carina sighed, “And then I feel bad thinking that, but because he never did, he never did anything to hurt them or disappoint them or humiliate them and I want to keep them from experiencing those things.”  </p><p>“We can’t protect them from everything,” Maya said, holding Carina a little tighter, “But I understand.  The things you experienced with your dad were hard and unfair, and I am not upset that the girls will never have to deal with that.  However you feel about your dad is ok.  Don’t judge yourself for feeling a little relieved that the man who caused a lot of your trauma won’t be able to inflict even a fraction of that trauma on our girls.”  </p><p>“You are really amazing, you know that?” Carina said, looking at her wife, “If anyone would have told me you would have such wise advice six years ago, I would not have believed them.” </p><p> “It’s just a lot of therapy and time,” Maya said, shrugging, “And a lot of love from you.”  </p><p>Carina smiled, leaning up and kissing Maya gently before settling back against her chest.  </p><p>Maya played with her hair as Carina drifted off into a light sleep, feeling especially grateful for her amazing wife at this moment.     </p><p> </p><p>They enjoyed the rest of their time in Italy, taking the girls to several places Carina loved going as a kid, spending some time with a few of Carina’s friends and cousins.  However, the time had finally come for them to head home. </p><p> The day before they left, while the babies napped, Maya and Carina worked on packing up everything and getting things in order for leaving.  They went to bed that night feeling ready to catch their 9 am flight the next morning.  </p><p>However, when they woke up the next day, Maya knew it was not going to be a good travel day.  She felt like absolute shit, her stomach full of terrible cramps, her head pounding, and everything just feeling bad.  She got up, going into the bathroom and realizing she had gotten her period 4 days early.  Normally, her periods were uncomfortable, but it was only this bad once every few years.  She got herself cleaned up before heading out to get the rest of her family going.  </p><p>“Come on Car,” Maya said, shaking her wife a little, “We have to get up.”  </p><p>Carina groaned, rubbing her eyes as Maya went to get the twins.  Nora was in a bad mood this morning, not wanting to take much of her bottle and just weirdly fussy.  </p><p>“I was going to run and grab us one last Italian breakfast,” Carina said, “Are you good with the girls for a few minutes?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, “We’re almost ready to go.”  </p><p>“I won’t be long,” Carina said, heading out the door.</p><p>  While Carina was gone, Maya had every intention of getting the girls ready to go, but her stomach had other plans, keeping her in the bathroom way longer than she had time for this morning. Nora sat outside the bathroom door crying almost the entire time she was in there.  </p><p>The joys of parenthood, Maya thought, Can’t even deal with an upset stomach in peace.  </p><p>When she finished, she scooped Nora up, trying to calm her down, finding that somehow, Rowan had gotten into the perfectly packed diaper bag, throwing the contents all over the room.  </p><p>“Rowan Andrea,” Maya groaned, going over to her and taking the bag of puffs away from her, “I had this exactly how we needed it for today.”  </p><p>Carina walked back in as Maya was repacking the bag, the girls still in their pajamas.  </p><p>“What happened?” Carina asked, setting down the coffee and pastries.  </p><p>“I was in the bathroom and Rowan got into the diaper bag and destroyed the whole thing while Nora sat outside the door wailing,” Maya said, trying not to cry, “And I didn’t get the babies ready and now we are running late.”  </p><p>“Hey,” Carina said, seeing her wife coming apart at the seams, “What’s going on?” </p><p> “Nothing,” Maya said as she continued to shove things back into the diaper bag, “Can you just help me?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Carina said, knowing Maya wasn’t telling her the truth but also not wanting to push her when they really were running late, “Maya, we are going to be ok.” </p><p> Maya nodded, wiping her eyes as she finished getting the bag packed before grabbing Nora, getting her dressed.  </p><p>Soon enough, it was time to go, Maya and Carina having to take their breakfast to go.  Elena and Carlo were coming to drive them to the airport, Carina and Rowan going with Elena while Andrea, Maya, and Nora went with Carlo.  </p><p>The drive to the airport upset Maya’s stomach, and by the time they got there, she was just hoping she wouldn’t throw up.  Nora was also still crazy fussy which just made Maya feel worse.  </p><p>As soon as Carina saw her wife’s face, she knew something was wrong. </p><p> “Maya,” she said, pulling her aside as Andrew and Carlo started unloading the bags, “What is wrong?  And do not say nothing because I know that is not true.” </p><p> “I am not feeling very well at the moment,” Maya said, telling Carina half of the truth, “I’m hoping it goes away now that we are out of the car.  Come on, we need to get the girls.”  </p><p>They got the girls strapped into their carriers before saying goodbye to Elena and Carlo.  </p><p>“We will come see you soon,” Elena said, hugging her cousins.  “</p><p>Ciao,” Carina said, wiping the tears from the corners of her eyes, “See you soon.”  </p><p>They then headed into the airport to get their luggage checked in.  </p><p>“How are you feeling?” Carina asked as Andrew got his luggage checked.  </p><p>“Slightly better,” Maya said, “Still not very good though.”  </p><p>“I have some Pepto in my bag,” Carina said, “You can take it when we get through security.”  </p><p>“I actually need to use the bathroom before we do that,” Maya said as Andrew walked over to them, “Andrew, can you take her, just for a minute?”  </p><p>“Of course,” he nodded, taking Nora from Maya. </p><p> Maya was gone for a few minutes before rejoining the family, getting Nora strapped back on her chest.  </p><p>“Bambina,” Carina said, taking her hand as they walked toward security which was small in the little airport, “Are you sure you are alright?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya nodded, “Let’s do this.” </p><p> The trip through security was a bit less smooth this time, Nora deciding she had no desire to be in the carrier, screeching for a good ten minutes as Maya tried to shush her.  </p><p>“What is going on with her today?” Maya asked as she took Nora out of the carrier, trying to calm her down. </p><p> “Maybe she is teething again,” Carina said as they waited their turn. </p><p> “God, I hope not,” Maya said, walking through the metal detector, “If she is, this trip is going to be hell.”  </p><p>They made it through security, Nora finally settling a little bit.  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, “We have half an hour before boarding.”  </p><p>“Can I have some of that Pepto?” Maya asked as Andrew went to get coffee, “And maybe some Tylenol or something?” </p><p> “What is wrong, Bambina?” Carina asked, opening her bag and pulling out the meds.  </p><p>“I started my period this morning,” Maya said, taking the pills, “And it is a bad one.  My head is pounding, my stomach is a little bit of a mess, my back is achy, and I just don’t feel very well.  I’ll be ok.”  </p><p>“Oh Bambina,” Carina frowned, rubbing Maya’s back a little, “I am so sorry.  Just let me know if there is anything you need.”  </p><p>“I’ll be ok,” Maya said as Nora started fussing again, “This one, however…” </p><p> “I can take her,” Carina offered.  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, “My back hurts a little less when I’m walking around.”  </p><p>“Ok,” Carina nodded.  Maya paced around the airport with Nora, trying to calm the fussy baby.  She went into the bathroom, scrubbing her hands before looking down at Nora. </p><p> “Let me see your mouth,” Maya said, sticking her finger in her mouth, running it over her gums which were, unfortunately for her and everyone else they were about to spend the day with on the plane, swollen, “Oh Piccola. Let’s go see if Mamma has some medicine.  I am sorry this is happening today.” </p><p> Maya walked back to their gate, Carina and Andrew sitting together as Rowan stood with her hands on Andrew’s knees.  </p><p>“Hey,” Carina said, drawing her attention away from Rowan as Maya walked up, “How are you both doing?”  </p><p>“She’s teething,” Maya sighed, rubbing Nora’s back as she fussed a little, fingers in her mouth, “Please tell me you packed the baby meds?”  </p><p>“They are in our checked back,” Carina sighed as they called for their plane to board, “We can get some in Rome. I doubt they have any here.  The airport is too small.” </p><p> “Alright,” Maya nodded, hoping that they would somehow make it through the short flight from Catania to Rome without Nora crying the entire flight. </p><p> “Let’s board,” Carina said, picking up Rowan, “How are you feeling?” </p><p> “I think the Pepto is kicking in,” Maya said as they headed toward the door, “But I still don’t feel well.  I’ll be ok, though.” </p><p> “Alright,” Carina said, squeezing Maya’s hand a little, “Well, if you need anything, just let me know.  I’m sure Andrea could take Rowan for me and I can take Nora if you need to sleep or anything.”  </p><p>Maya nodded as they got on the plane.  The flight from Catania to Rome was rough.  Nora screamed as they took off, not settling until Maya was able to get up and walk with her up and down the aisle.  The dirty looks she got from a few people on the plane made her self-conscious and angry, and by the time they landed in Rome, she was in a bad mood.  </p><p>They headed to their next gate in the busy Rome airport, Rowan passed out on Carina as Nora whined, clearly tired but struggling to sleep. </p><p> “As soon as we get our stuff settled, I will go get her some medicine,” Carina said, rubbing Nora’s back. </p><p> “I just wish she would sleep,” Maya said, looking down at Nora, “Sleep, Piccola.  You will feel better.” </p><p> Carina could read the frustration in Maya’s body.  </p><p>“Why don’t we leave Rowan with Andrea, and I will hold Nora, and we can go get something for her, and some coffee or something for you?” Carina suggested, knowing Maya was going to need a break from the teething baby.  </p><p>“If you move Rowan, she’s gonna wake up,” Maya said, shaking her head, “But maybe we can dump our bags with Andrew?”  </p><p>“I can take Nora,” Andrew offered, having been ease dropping on their conversation.  </p><p>“She needs to sleep,” Maya said, shaking her head, “And she is miserable.  She isn’t going to want to go to you.  Thanks for offering though.”  </p><p>“Well, just let me know if you need anything,” Andrew said, not totally knowing what was going on with Maya, but knowing her well enough to see that she wasn’t herself.  </p><p>Maya and Carina put their stuff down before going to find a place to get some medicine to hopefully help Nora feel a little better.  They found a place quickly, Maya giving it to her as Carina paid for it, both of them desperate to get their little girl feeling a little better.  </p><p>“I need to go to the bathroom before she falls asleep,” Maya said as they walked, “Can you hold her?” </p><p> “Si,” Carina nodded, holding out her arms as Maya pulled off the baby.  </p><p>Maya used the bathroom before going back to find her wife holding an almost sleeping Nora.  </p><p>“Come here Piccola,” Maya said, getting her back in the baby carrier, Nora fussing for a second before settling down.  </p><p>“Thank goodness that worked,” Maya said, shaking her head, “I don’t think I could have taken much more of the crying.”</p><p>  “I’m sorry that flight was so rough,” Carina said, lacing her and Maya’s fingers, “I will take her on our next one.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, sighing.  </p><p>“I just wish I could snap my fingers and we would be home,” the blonde said as they walked.  </p><p>“I am sorry you are both feeling so bad today,” Carina leaned over, kissing Maya’s cheek.  </p><p>“Can we get gelato?” Maya asked, having skipped breakfast and a little hungry.  </p><p>“You want gelato?” Carin said, shocked because normally Maya wasn’t a fan of sweets, “At 11 am?”</p><p>  “It sounds so good right now,” Maya said, shrugging, “And I haven’t eaten anything all day because I have felt so sick.” </p><p> “Of course,” Carina nodded, “There is a good place this way.” </p><p> They walked a little ways, getting some gelato before heading back to their gate, Carina handing Andrew his favorite flavor.  </p><p>“It’s not even noon,” he said, looking at the two of them. </p><p> “Just say thank you and shut up,” Maya said, giving him a look.  </p><p>Andrew was a little taken aback but could tell something wasn’t right with her today so he just let it go.  Rowan woke up after a little while, Carina giving her some food they had packed before Andrew took her on a walk around the terminal, giving Maya and Carina a little time.  </p><p>“Can I have more Pepto?” Maya asked as she put her head on Carina’s shoulder, “My stomach is starting to feel bad again.”</p><p>  “Of course,” Carina nodded, grabbing her backpack, “Here.”  </p><p>“Thanks,” Maya said, swallowing the pills before putting her head back on Carina’s shoulder, the brunette running her hand up and down her wife’s back. </p><p> “I wish I could do something to help,” she said, kissing Maya’s temple. </p><p>“Shh,” Maya said, “I’m sleeping.”  </p><p>Carina laughed a little but decided to just be quiet, letting Maya had a little bit of rest.  This next flight was the longest leg of their journey, and hopefully the twins would nap during it at least a little.  Andrew came back with Rowan about thirty minutes later, raising an eyebrow at the sight before him.  </p><p>“They aren’t feeling well,” Carina explained, “Nora is getting teeth and Maya started her period this morning.”  </p><p>“That sucks,” Andrew said, “Well, whatever I can do to make this easier, just let me know.” </p><p> “Can you just keep Rowan until we get on the plane?” Carina asked, “I think Maya’s actually asleep right now, and I don’t want to move.”  </p><p>“Of course,” Andrew nodded, “Come on Rowan.  Let’s go walk around some more.” </p><p> Rowan babbled happily, reaching for Andrew’s hair.  </p><p>“Don’t pull my hair,” he chided lightly as they walked away.  </p><p>Carina smiled as she watched her little brother with her daughter.   Nora woke up about an hour after falling asleep which woke Maya too.  </p><p>“Let me take her,” Carina said as Maya sat up, “I have been baby free for a while.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, handing Nora to Carina, the little girl settling against her mamma.  </p><p>“I need to use the bathroom,” Maya said, getting up, “I’ll be right back.” </p><p> Three hours later, they were back on the plane, heading for New York.  The flight was not great.  Nora was fussy, Carina and Maya taking turns pacing with her.  Maya was not feeling well at all, almost throwing up twice from how much pain she was in.  </p><p>By the time they landed, it was after the girl’s bed time, both of them fussy and miserable.  </p><p>“Let’s change them into pajamas and try to get them to sleep,” Maya said, rubbing her temples.  </p><p>“Bambina, I can have Andrea help me,” Carina said, “You can just rest at the gate.”  </p><p>“I’m ok,” Maya said, “The meds you gave me on the plane have kicked in a little.”  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina nodded as they grabbed the diaper bag, “Let’s go.” </p><p> They got the girls changed before finding a mother’s room, feeding them before finally getting them down.  “</p><p>Let’s just stay here for a little bit,” Carina said, knowing the overwhelming noise of the airport was getting to her so she could only imagine that Maya was feeling it too.  </p><p>“It’s like you can read my mind,” Maya said, reaching over and taking Carina’s hand, “Was our time in Italy all you hoped it would be?”  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “It was better.  Taking our daughters to the place I grew up was something I always thought about since we decided to have kids, and this trip was more than I ever dreamed.  Getting to take them to meet my friends and family, and to placed I spent time when I was growing up, and to meet my parents, all of it was so amazing.  Thank you for insisting we take this trip.” </p><p> “I know how important where you come from is to you,” Maya smiled, “And the girls have spent time with the tiny family I have.  It was important that they get to know yours in person too.  I love how close you are to your family in Italy, and I want the girls to grow up knowing them as much as they can.”  </p><p>“I love you so much Bambina,” Carina smiled, kissing Maya’s hand. </p><p> They spent another two hours in the quiet room before heading to board the plane.  The flight was a little better than the one before it, Nora only fussing for an hour or so before giving it up and sleeping.  Maya struggled to fall asleep, only getting about thirty minutes.  </p><p>When they landed, it was 10 pm Seattle time.  They got back through customs, grabbing their bags before meeting Vic.  </p><p>“How was the trip?” Vic asked as she helped them get the luggage loaded up.  </p><p>“Good,” Carina smiled, “We had a good time.”  </p><p>Maya got the babies in the car, Nora waking up a little, but luckily calming down.  </p><p>“Tonight is gonna suck,” Maya said, “They are not going to sleep.”  </p><p>“We can take turns,” Carina said, “I got like 5 hours on the plane.”  </p><p>“I hate you a little bit,” Maya said, rubbing her eyes.  Soon enough, they were heading home, Carina insisting Maya sit up front, the blonde falling asleep. </p><p> “Is she ok?” Vic asked Carina.  </p><p>“She’s not feeling good,” Carina sighed, “Nothing bad, but between that and Nora teething, today has been long.”  </p><p>“Nora’s teething?” Vic said, “That sucks.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, looking at both girls who were sleeping.  Vic dropped them off, Maya waking as the car stopped.  </p><p>“Sorry,” she said, rubbing her eyes, “I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”  </p><p>“It’s ok,” Vic shrugged as they got out, “You should take sleep where you can get it.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, getting out of the car.  Vic left after giving them all hugs, the twins having woken up on the drive.  Maya and Carina took the girls inside, both girls excited to be back in their own house, Rowan immediately crawling over to her toys.  Nora didn’t want to be put down, but she was still in a much better mood than she had been all day. </p><p> The two moms were exhausted, taking the babies upstairs for a bath.  They then made them some food, knowing the girls were hungry because their little bodies thought it was 9 am.  </p><p>After feeding them, Carina sent Maya to bed, the blonde looking genuinely miserable.  The rest of the night had Maya and Carina alternating between sleeping and being awake with the girls.  </p><p>They both crashed together around 6 am when the girls went down for a nap.  </p><p>“When do you have to go back to work?” Carina asked as they crawled into bed. </p><p> “Tomorrow,” Maya yawned, “You?”  “Three days,” Carina said, “You are not going to want to go back tomorrow.”  </p><p>“I need to,” Maya said, closing her eyes, “I’ll just drink a lot of coffee.”  </p><p>“Whatever you say Bambina,” Carina said, shaking her head, “Whatever you say.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  I hope you liked it! Also, the Marina scenes we got this week were so sweet.  I loved Maya choosing to be vulnerable, and Carina's beautiful reassurances. And can we just take a second to love the fact that Maya was wearing the same jacket she wore when she met Carina. So cute! Also, any Grey's fans out there freaking out about Lexie coming back! Literally never thought it would happen in a million years and I am so excited! Anyway, thanks for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0024"><h2>24. Sick Part 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The girls were almost one when the family had their first full family big illness.  Sure, the girls felt bad after getting shots, and Nora had had an ear infection a few months back, and they all had had colds since the girls started daycare, but the first time all four of them got really sick, it was unpleasant to say the least. </p><p> It had started with Rowan not wanting to eat dinner. </p><p> “Come on Ro Ro,” Maya said, handing Rowan an avocado slice, “You love avocado.” </p><p> Rowan just set it down on her tray, yawning.  </p><p>“Are you sleepy Patatina?” Maya asked, frowning. </p><p> It was only about 5 pm, still almost two hours until the girls normally went down.  Rowan just whined in her high chair, reaching for Maya.  </p><p>“Let me just finish making our dinner,” Maya said.  </p><p>Normally, she and Carina ate with the girls, just feeding them a little of whatever they were having, but tonight, Carina worked until 6, meaning she wouldn’t be home until bed time so Maya had decided to make lasagna for them as a treat. </p><p> Rowan started crying from her high chair as Maya finished up with dinner, throwing it in the fridge before going over to her clearly upset daughter. </p><p> “Alright, Ro,” Maya said, taking off her bib and picking her up, “It’s ok.”  </p><p>Rowan just laid her head on Maya’s shoulder, sniffling a little.  </p><p>“What’s wrong, huh?” Maya asked, rubbing her back as she went into the kitchen to clean up.  </p><p>Nora yelled, smacking her spoon on her high chair tray happily. </p><p> “At least someone’s happy tonight,” Maya smiled as Nora picked up a green bean, popping it into her mouth and smiling with all four of her little teeth showing.  </p><p>Maya tried to set Rowan down next to her toys, but the baby just cried, reaching desperately for Maya.  </p><p>“What is going on tonight Ro Ro?” Maya asked, picking her back up.  </p><p>She went into the entryway, grabbing a baby carrier off the hook, throwing it on.  She needed to get the kitchen cleaned, but clearly Rowan also needed her.  </p><p>She cleaned her mess up as quickly as she could before getting Nora cleaned up too and setting her down to go play.  Nora quickly crawled over to her toys, grabbing out a little plastic phone that played songs, dancing a little.  </p><p>Maya looked down at Rowan, shocked to see that the baby was sound asleep on her chest.  Rowan was normally the harder of the two to get down so to have her fall asleep an hour and a half before bed time was not at all normal.  </p><p>Maya put her hand on Rowan’s forehead, unable to tell if she was warm.  She grabbed their thermometer out of the cabinet, running it over her forehead.  99.2.  Not really even a fever. </p><p> Maya sighed, knowing that if she let Rowan sleep, she might pay for it at 3 am when the baby woke up, but something seemed off so she decided to just leave her for now.  </p><p>She went and sat on the couch, taking Rowan out of the carrier and just holding her.  Nora crawled over after a few minutes, pulling herself to stand and cruising around the couch until she got to Maya. </p><p> “Mamamama,” the baby said, hitting the couch. </p><p> “Hi Nora Mae,” Maya said, smiling as Nora continued to babble.  </p><p>Carina got home about thirty minutes later.  As soon as Nora heard the door open, she crawled over, smiling at Carina.  </p><p>“Hi Piccola,” Carina said, washing her hands before picking the little girl up, “Where is your sister?”  </p><p>Carina walked into the living room, shocked when she saw Maya sitting on the couch with a sleeping Rowan in her arms.  </p><p>“What happened?” Carina asked, concern filling her voice.  </p><p>“She wouldn’t eat dinner,” Maya said, “And then she wouldn’t play so I put her in the carrier and she fell asleep at like 5:30.  I took her temperature, but it’s only 99.2 so she doesn’t really have a fever, but I don’t know.  Something’s not right with her.” </p><p> “Poor Rowan,” Carina frowned, carrying Nora over to the couch, sitting down next to Maya.  Nora wiggled, wanting to go play again.</p><p> “How was work?” Maya asked as Carina leaned over and gave her a kiss.  </p><p>“It was fine,” Carina said, “Nothing too exciting.  How was your afternoon off?”  </p><p>“Uneventful,” Maya said, “Shoot.  I meant to put the lasagna in before you got home, but then Ro needed attention and…”</p><p>“You made lasagna?” Carina asked.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, “I thought we could have a little in house date night tonight after these two are in bed.”  </p><p>“Sounds perfect,” Carina said, giving Maya another kiss before going into the kitchen, putting dinner in the oven. </p><p> Nora played a little longer before her amazing internal clock kicked in and she knew it was almost bed time. </p><p>“That is one way you take after Mamma,” Maya said, kissing Nora’s cheek as Carina picked her up, “My body never thinks it’s sleeping time.”  </p><p>Nora just rubbed her face on Carina’s shoulder.  They took the girls upstairs, Maya carefully changing Rowan’s diaper and clothes before putting the still sleeping baby in her crib.  </p><p>“Something definitely is not right with her,” Carina said, shaking her head as she changed Nora, “We should take her temperature again before we go to bed.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, putting a hand on Rowan’s chest, feeling the even breaths, reassuring herself that the baby was breathing fine. </p><p>After her last bottle, a book, and a song, a very sleepy Nora was put in her crib, and Maya and Carina left the room, heading downstairs.  </p><p>“Maybe I’ll go take her temperature before we eat,” Maya said, grabbing the thermometer, “Just to make sure.”  </p><p>Maya snuck back into the nursery, running the thermometer over Rowan’s head.  </p><p>“What was it?” Carina asked as Maya walked back down stairs.  </p><p>“100.8,” Maya said, “She’s got a fever.  That explains why she was so grumpy tonight.”  </p><p>“Poor Rowan,” Carina said, frowning, “At least she’s sleeping.  She will be alright.”  </p><p>“I just feel bad for her,” Maya said, shaking her head, “She seemed so miserable tonight.” </p><p> “She probably just picked up some daycare bug,” Carina said, “Amelia and Teddy complain about them all the time.” </p><p> “Andy too,” Maya nodded, because although Luca and Ronnie were in a different daycare, it was a universal problem.  </p><p>They ate their dinner, just enjoying a little time just the two of them without the girls before going upstairs, Carina checking on Rowan before the two of them made their way to the bedroom.  Now that they had worked past Carina’s insecurities after having the babies, their sex life was back to its pre-baby bliss.  However, just as they finished their first, in what they had hoped to be at least two, rounds of amazing sex, they heard a cry from the nursery.  </p><p>“I’ve got her,” Maya said, knowing what she had just done to Carina would probably make it a little hard for the brunette to stand at the moment. </p><p> Maya pulled on a t-shirt before walking down to the nursery, finding Rowan awake and mad in her bed. </p><p> “Come here,” Maya said, picking her up, frowning at the warmth as Rowan started coughing.  </p><p>“Oh, that sounds bad,” Maya said, carrying the baby out of the nursery and into the master bedroom where Carina had just slipped her own clothed back on. </p><p> Rowan just laid her head on Maya, sniffling a little.  </p><p>“I think it’s safe to say some is sick,” Maya said, rubbing Rowan’s back as the little girl coughed again. </p><p> “Oh, Patatina,” Carina frowned, putting a hand on her cheek, “Poor little baby.”  </p><p>“She slept through her last feeding,” Maya said, “Maybe that would help her feel a little better?”  </p><p>Carina nodded, glad she was still not wearing a bra as she took Rowan.  The little girl latched quickly, taking about half of what she normally would before pushing away. </p><p>“I’m sorry you are sick, Ro,” Maya said, taking the baby as she reached for her.  </p><p>The girls seemed to go in phases as to who they wanted more.  A month ago, Rowan wanted nothing to do with Maya, but now, Mommy was her favorite person.  At first, both moms struggled when the girls didn’t want them, but by now, they had just accepted it as how it was.  </p><p>Rowan looked up at Maya before sneezing several times in her face.  </p><p>“Oh, Rowan,” Maya said, wiping her face, “I don’t really want whatever it is you have, thanks though.”  </p><p>Rowan just whimpered, cuddling closer to Maya.  </p><p>“It’s ok,” Maya said, pressing a kiss into Rowan’s blonde hair, “Mommy and Mamma are right here.” </p><p> Rowan coughed one more time before her little blue eyes slipped closed and she fell asleep.  </p><p>“She’s sleeping in here tonight,” Maya said.  </p><p>“Of course,” Carina nodded, knowing that was kinda their rule for when the girls were sick.  </p><p>Nora had been in their bed when she had an ear infection because Maya and Carina wanted to be able to keep an eye on her and this was no different.  Rowan just cuddled against Maya in her sleep, coughing a little.  </p><p>“Should we take her to the doctor?” Maya asked, rubbing her sick daughter’s back.  </p><p>“We can call in the morning,” Carina said, “Although, I’m betting this is a virus so there won’t be much they can do.”  </p><p>“Poor Rowan,” Maya said, settling back against the pillows. </p><p> “She will be alright,” Carina said, “I’m just hoping she’s the only one who gets whatever this is.”  </p><p>“Me too,” Maya said, “I don’t want two sick babies.”  </p><p>They spent the next two hours just chatting in bed, both of them keeping a close eye on Rowan who seemed to be sleeping as peacefully as she could on top of Maya.  </p><p>Eventually, they decided to call it a night, Maya trying to lay Rowan between them, but as soon as she took the baby off her, her little blue eyes popped open and she started crying and coughing. </p><p> “Ok,” Maya said, picking her back up, “Mommy is right here.  I won’t set you down.” </p><p> “You aren’t going to get any sleep,” Carina frowned.  </p><p>“I’d rather she sleep,” Maya said, “Maybe she’ll let me put her down at some point.  I’ll be ok.  You should sleep though because if she’s this bad all night, I am going to need a nap tomorrow.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, cuddling down under the covers.  The night was rough to say the least.  Rowan couldn’t manage to stay comfortable for more than about two hours at a time, meaning Maya was up a lot with her during the night, pacing the hallway, trying to help her feel better.  </p><p>Rowan’s cough didn’t sound great, but Maya pulled out a stethoscope, listening carefully to the baby’s lungs, satisfied that they were clear.  </p><p>Around three am, after almost an hour of crying, Rowan finally fell asleep.  Maya went into the bedroom, carefully slipping into bed with her sick daughter still on her chest.  Carina woke up a little when Maya got back in bed.  </p><p>“Did she finally settle?” she mumbled, looking over at Maya.  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya nodded, laying down carefully, “She’s just so miserable.”  </p><p>Carina nodded, reaching out and rubbing Rowan’s back a little.  </p><p>“Go back to sleep,” Maya whispered, letting her own eyes close. </p><p> Rowan was back awake at 5 from her cough, but she settled quickly, not quite falling asleep, but just resting on Maya, fussing any time Maya stopped rubbing her back.  </p><p>“You are quite demanding, you know that?” Maya whispered to the baby before kissing her forehead.</p><p>  The two of them just laid there for the next few hours until Nora started crying.  Maya was a little surprised Carina was still sleeping, but she got up, going into the nursery.  </p><p>Nora was laying in her bed, crying which was unusual.  Ever since the girls learned to pull up at 8 months, they would stand in their cribs whenever they woke up.  </p><p>Maya bent down, scooping Nora, pressing a kiss to her forehead, realizing that her hopes of escaping this with one sick kid were gone.  </p><p>“Are you feeling bad too, Piccola?” Maya asked as the baby rubbed her eyes, “Come on.  Let’s go downstairs and get you both some breakfast.”  </p><p>Maya went into the kitchen, trying to juggle both girls and heat up bottles, but it just wasn’t happening.  She set Rowan down in the bouncy seat, the baby crying as soon as she was out of Maya’s arms.  </p><p>“I know Ro,” Maya said, getting the bottles out of the fridge and sticking them in the bottle warmers.  </p><p>By the time the bottles were warm, Rowan was crying and coughing in the bouncer.  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, scooping her up, “I know.  I’m sorry.”  </p><p>Just as Maya settled the girls in her arms, she heard coughing and footsteps coming down the stairs.  Carina walked into the living room a minute later, looking miserable.  </p><p>“Oh, babe,” Maya said as Carina walked over to the couch, sitting down, “Did you catch whatever they have?”  </p><p>“They?” Carina said, coughing a little.  </p><p>“Oh, yeah, Nora woke up with a fever this morning,” Maya said, nodding, “So today, I get to take care of all three of my sick girls.”  </p><p>“I will be fine,” Carina mumbled, looking over at the babies, neither of them really eating much of their bottles. </p><p>Carina got up a minute later, disappearing into the kitchen.  She came back about five minutes later with a mug of tea.  </p><p>“Sorry you’re feeling bad,” Maya said as Carina groaned as she sat down.  </p><p>“You didn’t get me sick,” Carina shrugged, “And I don’t feel that bad.  I’m just so achy.  I am going to call their pediatrician when I’m done. I should probably give them a quick exam because I’d like to avoid taking them in if possible.” </p><p> “I can call,” Maya said, “You should rest.” </p><p> “I will do it,” Carina shook her head, “Did you get any sleep last night?” </p><p> “Maybe twenty minutes,” Maya said, shrugging, “Rowan was very needy.  I had to rub her back or she wouldn’t sleep.” </p><p> Just then, Nora spit her bottle out, deciding she was done, coughing a little as she turned herself over, cuddling close to Maya.  </p><p>After both girls finished eating, Carina gave each of the girls a quick exam before calling the pediatrician, talking to her for a little while, relaying what was going on.  </p><p>“Grazie,” Carina said, hanging up, “So she said there is a bad strain of parainfluenza going around.  The girls probably picked it up at daycare.  All we can do is keep them comfortable and keep an eye on their breathing.  Tylenol for the fevers.” </p><p> “Alright,” Maya nodded, “How long is it supposed to last?” </p><p> “7-10 days,” Carina said with a sigh, “But they will hopefully start feeling better in like 5 days.  We really have to watch their breathing though.  This virus causes croup.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, realizing they were in for a long few days.  </p><p>“Poor babies,” Maya said, Nora having gone over to Carina, “And poor you.”  </p><p>“We will be ok,” Carina yawned.  </p><p>The rest of the day was mostly spent on the couch and in bed, Carina, Nora, and Rowan all taking turns napping, Maya trying to force some fluids and food into them when they were awake.  </p><p>Around 6 pm, all three of their fevers spiked, and Carina got into the tub with both babies, just trying to make all three of them feel better.  It worked, at least a little, Nora falling asleep after close to an hour of tears.   </p><p>That night was worse than the one before.  Maya set up the portable cribs in their room so the girls could be close, but not in their bed, hopefully letting Carina sleep. However, neither of them spent more than an hour in their beds, desperately wanting to be held all night and waking up when Maya put them down. </p><p> By the next morning, Maya was exhausted.  She got up at 8, leaving both sleeping babies in bed with Carina to go grab bottles and tea. They pretty much spent the entire day in bed, Maya setting up their humidifier when Rowan started the classic croup cough which Carina knew from being a doctor and Maya knew from kids they had treated.  Both moms spent a lot of the day listening to the baby’s chest. </p><p> “Take her outside,” Carina said as Rowan coughed and wheezed around 4 pm, “See if the cold air helps.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, grabbing a blanket, wrapping Rowan up before going out to the backyard, Rowan’s breathing almost immediately starting to sound better.  </p><p>“There we go Ro,” Maya said, bouncing the baby, “I know it’s cold, but this is going to make your lungs better.”  </p><p>Rowan just laid her head on Maya’s shoulder, everything from the day making her too exhausted to care about how cold it was.  About ten minutes later, Maya took her back inside.  </p><p>“She’s sounding better,” Maya said, “But if she gets bad again tonight, I should probably take her in.” </p><p> “Si,” Carina nodded, wiping Nora’s nose.  </p><p>Around 3 am, Rowan was again struggling to breathe, little chest retracting as she coughed. </p><p>“Car,” Maya said, shaking her awake, “Car, I need to take Rowan to the hospital.”  </p><p>“Cosa?”  Carina said, waking up and hearing Rowan’s breathing, “Oh.  She sounds bad.  I’ve got Nora.  Go.” </p><p> Maya scooped Rowan up, grabbing some clothes for the baby who had been naked most of the day to help with her fever, dressing her quickly before grabbing the diaper bag, her wallet, and going out to the car.  The little girl’s breathing calmed a little in the cold November air. </p><p> “There we go,” Maya said, tucking a blanket around the baby, deciding to keep the windows down in the car to help Rowan breath better.  </p><p>The drive to the hospital took all of three minutes, Maya scooping Rowan up and walking into the hospital.  Rowan still didn’t sound great, and the nurses all knew Maya so she was taken back immediately.  </p><p>Rowan’s oxygen was a little on the low side, her breathing raspy and throat swollen.  They almost immediately put her on a nebulizer, Maya holding a very lethargic Rowan in her arms as the meds went into her lungs.  </p><p>Rowan’s temp had been close to 103 when they had gotten there so the doctors gave her a little Tylenol to help with that. Maya and Carina had been so good about keeping up with the Tylenol during the day, but the last dose she had had was at 8 pm at bedtime so it had worn off.  </p><p>The thing that worried Maya the most, though, was that Rowan just let the nurse put the mask on her face, not fighting it at all which was very unlike the typically feisty little girl.  </p><p>“Hey,” Amelia said, walking past the bed, “Oh my gosh, what happened?” </p><p> “Parainfluenza,” Maya said, running her hand over the top of Rowan’s head, “Nora and Carina both have it too, but Rowan’s turned into croup.” </p><p> “Poor baby,” Amelia said, coming closer, “Croup is hard.  We have spent many a night here with Scout and Harper.  You said Nora and Carina are sick too?”  </p><p>“Yeah,” Maya said, moving Rowan as the little girl fussed, trying to help her get comfortable.  </p><p>“Are you feeling alright?” Amelia asked, noticing the dark circles under Maya’s eyes.  </p><p>“Just exhausted,” Maya said, “Ro got sick two night ago so I haven’t gotten more than maybe an hour in the past three days.”  </p><p>“Maya,” Amelia said, shaking her head.  </p><p>“I know it’s bad,” Maya said, “But what am I supposed to do.  The girls are sick and so is Carina and someone has to take care of them.”  </p><p>Just then, Amelia’s pager went off.  </p><p>“I’ve gotta go,” Amelia said, “But seriously, Maya, sleep. You are no good to them if you get sick too.” </p><p> Maya just held Rowan, the little girl perking up a bit as the meds brought down her temperature and opened her little airways.  Rowan was also a little dehydrated because she had been fussy about drinking anything, but she happily took a bottle of Pedialyte that one of the nurses brought in. </p><p> By the time they left, Rowan was wide awake and almost didn’t seem sick.  </p><p>“She is probably going to be pretty wired for the next few hours from the meds,” the nurse said, smiling at Rowan who was standing in Maya’s lap, babbling away in her raspy little voice, “Sorry about that.”  </p><p>“It’s ok,” Maya said, “As long as her breathing is ok, I’ll take her being wired.”</p><p>  “Well, you are free to go,” the nurse said, “Keep up with the Tylenol, steamy showers, cold air, humidifier, lots of fluids.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Maya said, standing up with Rowan in her arms, “Let’s go home and find Mamma and Nora? Huh Patatina?”</p><p> Rowan babbled back, coughing a little, still sounding like she had a seal in her throat.  Maya took Rowan out to the car, getting her all strapped in.  They drove home, the little girl babbling the whole way. </p><p>It was nearing 6 am by the time they got home, Maya carrying Rowan inside, going upstairs to check on Nora and  Carina.  She found Carina out cold, but Nora was awake, just lying in bed.  </p><p>“Hey Nora,” Maya said, scooping her up, “Why don’t you come downstairs with me and Rowan?”  </p><p>Nora just coughed a little, laying her head on Maya’s shoulder.  She brought the girls downstairs, setting Rowan down on the floor to play while she sat on the couch with Nora on her chest, the baby too tired and feverish to do much.  </p><p>Maya wanted to get her some medicine, but she was almost asleep, and Maya was too tired to get up, so she decided that with breakfast, Nora could have more Tylenol.  </p><p>Maya watched Rowan crawl around, happy that the baby was more herself, even if it was just from the meds. </p><p> Around 7:30, Maya peeled herself off the couch, going into the kitchen with Nora still in her arms. </p><p> “Are you ready for some breakfast?” Maya asked, kissing Nora’s sweaty forehead.  </p><p>Maya heated up two bottle, taking them into the living room, realizing after she sat down that she had forgotten Tylenol, too tired to go get some.</p><p>  Rowan crawled over to the couch, whining for Maya to pick her up.  Maya complied, handing her her bottle.  </p><p>The girls learning to hold their own bottles had been one of the great milestones for Maya and Carina, allowing them to feed the girls more easily.  They still tried to hold them while they ate, but sometimes, it was nice to just let them have their bottles.  Carina was still breastfeeding Rowan when she could, but it was becoming less and less frequent, usually just at night before bed, and before naps if she was around. </p><p> Today, though, both girls wanted Maya to feed them, which was fine with her. </p><p> Just as the babies finished with their milk, Carina walked into the room.  </p><p>“What time did you get home?” she asked, sitting down on the couch.  </p><p>“Around 6,” Maya said, “She had a neb and some Tylenol so someone was feeling very good for a few hours.  I think it’s wearing off though.”  Maya motioned to Rowan who was resting on her lap. </p><p> “At least she’s breathing better,” Carina said, leaning down and kissing Rowan’s forehead.</p><p>  “How are you feeling?” Maya asked, looking over at Carina, “Did Nora let you sleep?” </p><p>“Sick,” Carina said, coughing, “And she was up for maybe two hours, but it’s fine. How are you feeling?  When was the last time you slept?”</p><p>  “I don’t know,” Maya yawned, coughing a little, “I’ll sleep once they’re better.”  </p><p>“Maya, I can watch them for a few hours so you can get some rest,” Carina said, noticing her wife was not looking good.  </p><p>“I’m fine,” Maya snapped before taking a breath, “Sorry.  I am alright.  Maybe I’ll try to get some sleep when they take their nap at 10, although, it wouldn’t surprise me if Ro passed out sooner.  She hasn’t slept since like 2 am.” </p><p> Carina sighed, putting her head on Maya’s shoulder.  Having all three of them laying on her was normally one of Maya’s favorite things, but today, it all felt very overwhelming.  Maya sat there for about five minutes before her body couldn’t take it anymore.  </p><p>“I need to go to the bathroom,” Maya said, moving Carina a little, “Can you take them?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, taking both babies from Maya.  </p><p>The blonde all but bolted upstairs and into the master bathroom, trying not to have a panic attack.  She wasn’t really even sure what was wrong.  Her body just felt hypersensitive and overstimulated.  She ran some cool water over her wrists, trying to cool herself down because she was suddenly feeling very hot.  </p><p>When she was done, she went into the bedroom, grabbing Carina’s weighted blanket out of the closet, just needing to have five minutes to herself to calm down.  She laid down in bed, doing a breathing activity she had learned in therapy, and before long, she had unintentionally fallen asleep.  </p><p>When Maya didn’t come back after fifteen minutes, Carina got worried, carrying the girls upstairs to look for her wife.  </p><p>“Oh bambina,” Carina frowned, finding Maya sound asleep in bed under the weighted blanket. </p><p> She set a tired Rowan down on the bed before going over to Maya, putting a hand on her forehead, wincing when she felt how warm the blonde was.  </p><p>“And now we are all sick,” Carina sighed, looking down at Nora, “What are we going to do Piccola?”  Nora just sneezed.  </p><p>“I think we are going to start with some medicine for you and your sister,” Carina said, “And then I am going to try to put you in your pack and plays because Mommy and I need some rest.”</p><p>  Carina quickly got the girls some medicine before laying the nearly sleeping babies down, climbing into bed with Maya.  She put a hand on her wife’s forehead again, trying to judge just how warm her wife was because the thermometer was downstairs which was so far away.  She decided Maya had a pretty high fever, but nothing that needed any immediate attention.    </p><p>Carina then rolled over, closing her eyes and falling asleep.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  Sick fics are my sweet spot when it comes to writing, so I had to do one for this little family.  I hope you liked it.  There's a part 2 coming soon, hopefully in the next few days, and then one or two more chapters before this story is coming to an end.  I hope you have been enjoying it.  Thanks for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0025"><h2>25. Sick Part 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>About an hour later, Carina woke up to the sound of someone coughing.  She forced her eyes open, seeing that Maya had clearly been woken up as well.  </p><p>“Did I fall asleep?” Maya said, rubbing her eyes as she started coughing.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina said, forcing herself out of bed.</p><p>  Nora was coughing in her bed, starting to sound a lot like Rowan had the night before.  </p><p>“Come here,” Carina said, picking up the baby, “That sounds bad.” </p><p> “I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” Maya said, shivering a little, “I was feeling very anxious and overstimulated so I came up here to calm down.  I feel terrible.” </p><p> “You have a fever,” Carina nodded, sitting down on the bed by her wife, “You’re sick too.”  </p><p>“I can’t be,” Maya said, coughing, “You and the girls are sick.”  </p><p>“Well, you are,” Carina said, rubbing Nora’s back, “We are all sick.”  </p><p>“She sounds bad,” Maya said before she broke into her own full blown coughing fit.  </p><p>“Oh bambina,” Carina said, frowning.</p><p>“Do you think she needs to go to the hospital?” Maya said, getting control over her breathing.  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, “Not yet at least.  I am going to go run a hot shower and sit in the bathroom with her.”  </p><p>“I’ll probably join you in a minute,” Maya said, “My chest is tighter than I would like.”  </p><p>“You need to watch that,” Carina said, “This can turn into pneumonia and your lungs are bad from last time you had it.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, knowing that the bout of pneumonia she had not long before they got engaged combined with the exposure to smoke on the job made her lungs more susceptible to infections.  </p><p>About three minutes after Carina went into the bathroom, Rowan woke up from a coughing fit.  </p><p>“Oh, those meds have worn off haven’t they,” Maya said, scooping the baby up, “Let’s go find Mamma and Nora and see if we can open you back up.” </p><p>Rowan limply laid on Maya’s shoulder, rubbing at her eyes.  Maya walked to the bathroom, finding Carina and Nora sitting on the floor as hot water ran out of the shower, filling the room with steam.  </p><p>“Someone else isn’t sounding too good,” Maya said, sitting down next to her wife.  </p><p>“These poor babies,” Carina said, shaking her head.  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, pulling Rowan’s jammies off to keep her temperature down in the warm bathroom.  </p><p>All four of them sat there for close to a half an hour, both the babies just laying on their moms.  Eventually, the hot water ran out, and they all left the bathroom.  </p><p>“Why don’t I go grab Nora a bottle while you nurse Rowan,” Maya said, setting the baby down on the bed. </p><p> Carina nodded as Maya left the room.  Five minutes later, she reappeared with a bottle, two bottles of water, and two glasses of juice.  </p><p>“We are both dehydrated,” Maya said, handing Carina the water.  </p><p>The brunette nodded, drinking close to half the water as Maya scooped Nora up, popping the bottle in her mouth.  </p><p>Once the babies were done eating, they both decided they had a little energy, the meds from earlier having brought their fevers down enough that they had perked up a little.  Rowan climbed off Carina’s lap and crawled around on the bed, playing peek a boo with Maya for a little bit.  Nora didn’t get off her mom’s lap, but she babbled a little, clearly feeling at least slightly better.  </p><p>Maya almost fell asleep sitting there, Carina trying to take Nora off her lap only to have the blonde jerk awake.  </p><p>“You need to sleep, Bambina,” Carina said, reaching over and putting a hand on her wife’s forehead.  </p><p>“I’m ok,” Maya mumbled sleepily. </p><p> “None of us are really ok,” Carina said, rubbing Nora’s back as she coughing.  </p><p>“Is she retracting?” Maya asked, forcing her eyes to stay open.  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, both of the girls still only dressed in diapers so it was easy to see their chests moving, “Seriously, Bella, sleep.  You look so sick.  You have been up with the babies for days.  I am feeling a little better.  You need to take care of yourself.”  </p><p>Maya tried to argue, but her coughing cut her off.  </p><p>“Sleep,” Carina said, giving Maya a look.  </p><p>As Maya curled up under the blankets, Rowan crawled over to her, getting on top of her.  </p><p>“Patatina,” Carina said, “Mommy needs to sleep.” </p><p> “She’s fine,” Maya said as Rowan laid down, “I’ve got her.” </p><p> At some point, all of them must have fallen asleep because the next thing Carina knew, she heard movement downstairs.  She panicked a little, grabbing her phone.  However, a second later, Amelia appeared in the doorway.  </p><p>“Hey,” the neurosurgeon said, “How are you guys doing?”  </p><p>“What are you doing here?” Carina asked, pushing herself up to sitting, keeping Nora snug on her chest.  </p><p>“Well, I saw Maya and Rowan in the ER last night,” Amelia said, “And I texted you like 10 times asking how things were going, but I didn’t get an answer, and honestly, both of them looked terrible, and she said you and Nora were sick too so I decided to bring over some soup and juice and check on you all.  I used your garage code to get in.  How are you feeling?” </p><p> “Bad,” Carina admitted, looking over as Rowan let out a barking cough, glad the baby was still sleeping, “Both girls have croup, and Maya spiked a fever this morning and she sounds bad too.” </p><p> Just then, Nora woke up, coughing hard.  </p><p>“Poor baby,” Amelia said, frowning, “This is what I am going to do.  For starters, I am going to run to the hospital and grab a portable neb and some meds so if that gets worse, you don’t have to go to the ER in the middle of the night.  And then I am going to come back and hold your babies for a few hours so you two can get some real sleep.”  </p><p>“No,” Carina said, shaking her head, “I can’t ask you to do that.  This virus is terrible, and I don’t want you or your kids to get it.”  </p><p>“You’re not asking,” Amelia said, “I’m offering.  Trust me, I know how terrible it is to be sick when the kids are sick, and I always have a hoard of sisters who want to help.  Let me help you guys out.  Just for a few hours. You both need to rest if you are going to get better.”  </p><p>“Fine,” Carina mumbled, knowing her friend was right.  </p><p>Nora was clearly uncomfortable, her little body working overtime to get a decent breath. </p><p> “I am going to take her outside,” Carina said, standing up, grabbing a blanket out of the portable crib, “She needs something to calm her lungs down.”  </p><p>“I won’t be long,” Amelia said, nodding, “If the cold air doesn’t help, the neb will.” </p><p> “Grazie Amelia,” Carina said as they walked downstairs, Carina grabbing a blanket off the couch for herself before going out on their covered front porch. </p><p> It was pouring rain, which was pretty typical for Seattle in November, and the sound seemed to calm Nora down a little.  They just sat there for a few minutes, Carina listening to the baby’s breathing even out a little.  Nora still sounded like a baby seal when she coughed, but at least she was breathing a bit better.</p><p>  Eventually, both of them started shivering and Carina went back inside, grabbing the thermometer before going upstairs.  She quickly took everyone’s temp which ranged from 101.4 on Rowan to 103.8 on Maya, but the blonde always ran high fevers so Carina wasn’t too worried, knowing that the lack of sleep her wife had gotten over the past few days was probably making it worse.  </p><p>Within half an hour, Amelia was back with the nebulizer.  </p><p>“Alright,” Amelia said, “Let me have them.”  </p><p>“They have been very clingy these past few days,” Carina warned, giving Nora to Amelia, the baby not really making much of a fuss.  </p><p>Just then, Rowan’s eyes popped open.  </p><p>“Perfect timing, Patatina,” Carina smiled, carefully moving her off Maya’s chest, “They had meds around 9, just Tylenol, and they were fed at like noon.  They will honestly probably just cuddle with you.  If either of them won’t settle, just wake me up.”  </p><p>“I’ve got them,” Amelia said, nodding, “Get some rest.  We will be right downstairs.”  </p><p>“Thank you,” Carina smiled before rolling over, snuggling close to Maya. </p><p> The blonde suddenly stirred, looking at her wife before sitting up in a full panic. </p><p> “Where are the babies?” Maya asked, coughing as she did so.  </p><p>“Breathe,” Carina said, sitting up too, rubbing Maya’s back, “Just breathe.”  </p><p>Once Maya stopped coughing, she looked around, still panicked, “Where are the babies?”  </p><p>“They are downstairs with Amelia,” Carina said, “She came over to check on us and offered to keep an eye on them for a few hours so we can sleep.  Apparently, you looked bad enough at the hospital last night that she was worried.” </p><p> “I’m fine,” Maya mumbled, laying back down.  </p><p>“Just sleep,” Carina said, “The babies are taken care of by a brilliant doctor and mother so we should take advantage.”  </p><p>Maya didn’t need to be told twice, eyes slipping closed as the two of them cuddled together, grateful they had such good friends. </p><p> The next few days were rough, and Maya and Carina were beyond grateful they had the nebulizer at home because both girls ended up needing  treatments along with Maya who started getting wheezy on the second day she was sick. </p><p>Vic and Travis stopped by on the fifth day of the twins being sick, which was apparently Thanksgiving, although neither Maya nor Carina had any concept of time, bringing them some food and taking a four hour stint with the girls who were, by that point, starting to feel better. </p><p> Carina’s fever broke earlier that day, leaving her feeling more human finally, especially after the nap she had gotten thanks to Travis and Vic.   Maya, however, was still pretty miserable.  </p><p>“I can’t believe we are spending their first Thanksgiving sick,” Maya coughed, rubbing her tired eyes as she sat on the couch with Vic, Travis, and Carina, just watching the twins crawl around. </p><p> “They won’t remember it anyway,” Vic said, smiling as Nora crawled over to her, reaching to be picked up.  </p><p>As she sat in Vic’s lap, Nora started coughing, the only real evidence of how sick the little girl had been.  </p><p>“You sound like you belong at the zoo,” Vic smiled at Nora, “But at least you seem to be feeling better.” </p><p> “Look,” Carina said, pointing over to where the twins normally played.  </p><p>There, Rowan was standing in the middle of the room, a skill she had mastered a long time ago, but this time, she lifted one little foot, taking a shaky step forward.  </p><p>“Oh my god,” Maya said as Carina whipped out her phone to capture it. </p><p> Rowan took another step, and another one slowly moving toward Maya and Carina.  She made it almost all the way before she fell down.  </p><p>“Oh my goodness, Rowan Andrea,” Maya said, scooping her up off the floor, “That was such a good job.”  </p><p>Rowan smiled as Maya hugged her, babbling a little in her raspy voice.  </p><p>“Rowan,” Carina said, taking her from Maya, “You are getting too big, troppo grande, Patatina.”  </p><p>Rowan laughed a little before coughing, rubbing her eyes. </p><p> “I can’t believe they are old enough to be walking,” Travis said, shaking his head as Nora crawled to him, sighing as she relaxed into her favorite uncle’s arms.  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, setting Rowan back down to play, “They are going to be a year old in a little over a month.” </p><p> Rowan continued to test out her new skill for a little while before getting tired, crawling over to Maya.  </p><p>“I can take her,” Carina said, seeing how exhausted Maya still looked.  </p><p>“I’ve got her,” Maya said, adjusting so Rowan was laying on her chest, the baby coughing a little, “She just wants to be held which is about all I feel up to doing for them right now.” </p><p> “Whose up for some soup?” Travis asked, getting up, “I know my cooking doesn’t hold a flame to Carina, but I did make Michael’s famous chicken soup.”  </p><p>“That sounds great,” Maya said, coughing some, clearly disturbing Rowan, “Sorry, Rowan.  Mommy still isn’t feeling well.”  </p><p>Rowan just sighed, laying back down.  </p><p>“I’ll help you, Trav,” Vic said, “Nora clearly still needs you to hold her.” </p><p> Vic brought out two bowls of soup for Maya and Carina.  </p><p>“Do you want us to put them in their high chairs and feed them?”  Vic asked, taking Rowan from Maya. </p><p> “You can try,” Carina nodded, “But if they don’t want to, don’t push it.  Crying makes their coughing worse.”</p><p>  Both girls decided to eat some food for their Aunt Vic and Uncle Travis while their moms also put some nutrients in their sick bodies.  By the time Vic and Travis left that evening, both babies had had a bath courtesy of Vic and were happily cuddling with their moms in bed.  </p><p>“I’ll go put them down so you can rest,” Carina said, coughing a little.  </p><p>“Can we just keep them in here for a little bit?” Maya asked, “I’m not ready to sleep, and they are still so cuddly.” </p><p> “Of course,” Carina said, smiling as Nora crawled over to Maya, laying her little head on her mommy’s chest, “How are you feeling this evening?”  </p><p>“Not great,” Maya coughed, “ How are you feeling?” </p><p> “Better,” Carina said, “Not having a fever for the first time in five days feels good.  I still don’t feel back to normal, but better.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, rubbing her eyes.  She was now the only one in the house with a fever, and of course it was high in classic Maya fashion.  </p><p>The twins broke their fevers the night before and while they both still sounded bad, they were much happier and more themselves apart from being extremely cuddly.  Rowan started coughing long and hard, Carina rubbing her back as the baby struggled to get a good breath.  </p><p>“Oh Ro,” Maya frowned as the baby finally stopped coughing, leaning back on Carina, clearly worn out from the fit, “That cough is terrible.” </p><p> “She sounds like you,” Carina said as Maya started coughing.  </p><p>They all went to bed early that night, everyone’s tired bodies needing to feel better. </p><p> The next day, Carina got up in the morning with the babies, letting Maya sleep, hoping maybe it would help break her fever.  </p><p>By the time Carina put the babies down for a nap, Maya still hadn’t woken up so she went to check on her.  The doctor found her wife in bed, awake.  </p><p>“Hey,” Carina said, sitting down, “How are you feeling?”  </p><p>“I was going to get up and help you with the babies,” Maya said before she broke off into a harsh coughing fit, “But everything hurts.”  </p><p>“I’m sorry Bambina,” Carina said, frowning at how hot her wife’s skin was, “I am going to go run a bath.  We need to get that fever down.  And your breathing is starting to sound bad again.  Maybe another breathing treatment too?  And some Tylenol.  You cannot be this hot.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, coughing again.  Carina went into the bathroom, running the water before grabbing some medicine and a glass of water for her wife.  </p><p>“Here you go,” Carina said, handing Maya the meds and water, “Drink all the water.  You are dehydrated.” </p><p> Maya did as she was told before going into the bathroom, Carina helping her get into the tub.  </p><p>“I am going to go get you something else to drink,” Carina said, “Relax.”  </p><p>Maya was truly feeling terrible, just lying in the tub, her eyes closed.  </p><p>“You alright?”  Carina asked, coming back into the bathroom with a glass of orange juice.  </p><p>“I will be,” Maya said, opening her eyes.  </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said, “Can I get you anything?”  </p><p>Maya shook her head, coughing harshly.  </p><p>“Oh bambina,” Carina frowned, “You sound so bad.  When you get out, you are getting another breathing treatment.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, struggling to breathe.  After twenty minutes, Maya was done in the tub, pulling herself out and going into the bedroom, pulling on warm pajamas.  Just as she was about to get into bed, Carina came into the room with the nebulizer.  “Ready for some of this?” Carina asked, setting the machine down.  </p><p>“Don’t want it,” Maya mumbled, pulling the blankets up. </p><p> “I am going to get a stethoscope,” Carina said, putting a hand on Maya’s too hot forehead, “If your lungs sound as bad as I think they will, you are taking another treatment.” </p><p> “Fine,” Maya nodded, coughing.  </p><p>She knew Carina was right.  Her lungs were tricky business that could get really bad really fast if she didn’t stay on top of them when she got sick.   </p><p>“Alright,” Carina said as she walked up to the bed, “Let me have a listen.”  </p><p>Maya sat up, letting Carina hear her lungs.  </p><p>“Neb,” Carina said, taking the stethoscope out of her ears, “I think you have bronchitis.” </p><p> “Alright,” Maya said, leaning back against the pillows, accepting the mask from Carina, “But only if you lay down with me.  You need to rest too.  You’re not totally over this.” </p><p> Carina nodded, knowing the babies should be asleep for at least another hour, and she was pretty tired.  Maya motioned for Carina to come closer to her, moving so the brunette’s head was in her lap. </p><p>“This whole being sick with kids thing sucks,” Maya said running her hands through Carina’s hair.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, “Way worse than getting sick before they were here.”  </p><p>Carina ended up falling asleep quickly, Maya pretty awake after the treatment, body exhausted but unable to actually sleep.  When she heard Rowan barking and crying an hour and a half later, the blonde carefully got up, going into the nursery.  </p><p>“Hi Patatina,” Maya said, picking her up, “How are you feeling?”  </p><p>Rowan smiled a little at Maya before she started coughing again.  </p><p>“That cough is so bad,” Maya said, shaking her head, “Should we go downstairs?” </p><p> Rowan babbled as Maya walked over to Nora’s crib, finding the other baby also awake.  </p><p>“Come on,” Maya said, bringing them downstairs.  </p><p>Just carrying the girls down the stairs was exhausting to Maya’s sick body, her lungs protesting as soon as she set them down.  </p><p>Maya continued coughing as she went into the kitchen, grabbing some apple sauce pouches, veggie straws, cheese stick, and some bottles, bringing them into the living room.  They normally only ate in the kitchen, but Maya was too exhausted to mess with high chairs.  She sat down on the floor, handing each of the girls a pouch. </p><p> Once the girls had had some food, Maya just laid down on the floor as the twins crawled around her, Nora coming and laying down next to her after a little while.  </p><p>“Hi Piccola,” Maya said sleepily, “Are you still not feeling good too?”  </p><p>About an hour later, Carina came downstairs, frowning at the sight she saw before her. </p><p> “Maya,” she said, the blonde looking up at her wife, “Why didn’t you wake me up?”  </p><p>“I was wired from the neb,” Maya said, coughing, “And they woke up so I just brought them down here, got them some food, and just let them play.  It’s fine.”  </p><p>“You need to go back to bed,” Carina said, putting a hand on Maya’s forehead, wincing at the heat.  </p><p>“I’m good here for now,” Maya said shaking her head, “Going back upstairs is too much work.”</p><p>  “I’m sorry you are feeling so sick Bambina,” Carina frowned, going into the kitchen, filling a water bottle and bringing it to her wife, “Drink please.”  </p><p>Maya did as she was told, Carina sitting down next to her after grabbing a blanket for the sick woman.  Maya moved so her head was in her wife’s lap, drifting in and out of sleep as the girls played. </p><p> She woke up when she heard someone start coughing again.  She looked around, seeing Nora curled up in Carina’s arms coughing.  </p><p>“Is she ok?” Maya asked, forcing herself up to sitting.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded as Nora settled, “Did you get any sleep?”  </p><p>“Some,” Maya yawned before she started coughing again.  </p><p>“Mommmy,” Rowan said, crawling over to them, looking at Maya.  </p><p>“Are you saying Mommy?” Maya asked, picking her up.  </p><p>“Mommmmy,” Rowan said again, putting a hand on Maya’s face.  </p><p>“That’s right,” Maya said, feeling tears fill her eyes, “I am Mommy.” </p><p> Rowan gave Maya a baby kiss that was more slobber than kiss.  </p><p>“Mamma,” Nora said, picking her head up off Carina’s chest, looking up at her, “Mamma.”  </p><p>“They’re calling us by our names,” Carina said, tears filling her own eyes.  </p><p>“They are getting so big,” Maya said, taking another drink from her water bottle.  </p><p>As she did, Rowan hollered, grabbing the cup.  </p><p>“Ok,” Maya said, laughing, “You can have some too.”  </p><p>Normally, Maya was not a fan of sharing her drinks with the babies, but at this point, they were all sick and it didn’t matter.  Plus, getting fluids into Rowan had been a little tricky so anything she wanted to drink, Maya was going to give her.  </p><p>“You should go back to bed and get some real sleep,” Carina said as Maya yawned and coughed, “You are not going to get better if you don’t rest.”  </p><p>“I know,” Maya said, shivering, “I will.” </p><p>Maya got up a minute later, going to go upstairs.  However, as she did, Rowan started crying, reaching for her.  </p><p>“I’ll take her with me,” Maya said, scooping Rowan up.  </p><p>“Maya, you need to sleep,” Carina sighed, “And even though she is clingy, she is not sleepy. You won’t get any rest with her up there.”  </p><p>“Nap is in an hour,” Maya said, “I’ll keep her with me until then, and then I will sleep.” </p><p> “Fine,” Carina agreed as Maya went upstairs.</p><p>  Rowan ended up being a lot more energetic than Maya anticipated, crawling all over the bed, sitting on Maya and babbling non-stop.  </p><p>By the time Carina came up to put her down for a nap, Maya’s head was pounding, and as much as she loved her daughter, she had never been happier for nap time.  Within two minutes of Carina taking Rowan, Maya was out.  </p><p>The next time she woke up, it was dark outside and Carina was in bed next to her.  </p><p>“Where are the babies?” she asked, coughing as she sat up.  </p><p>“Asleep, hopefully for the night,” Carina said, “It’s almost 8 pm.  How are you feeling?”  </p><p>“I don’t know,” Maya said, coughing harshly, “Maybe a little better.”  </p><p>“Well, you need to eat something and drink something,” Carina said, kissing Maya’s forehead, noticing it seemed a bit cooler, but still really hot, “What would you like?”  </p><p>“Do we have soup?” Maya asked, sitting up a little.  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, “And drink?”  </p><p>“Water,” Maya said, coughing again.  </p><p>“Maybe another neb too?” Carina said, rubbing her back.  </p><p>“No,” Maya groaned, “I just want to sleep.”  </p><p>Carina sighed, knowing that Maya probably needed more meds, but also that sleep was important for her healing too.  She decided to wait and see how her wife sounded after some food.  Carina went downstairs, grabbing things for Maya before taking them up to her wife.  </p><p>“Bambina,” Carina said, rubbing her back when she found her sleeping again, “Come on.  Wake up.”  </p><p>Maya’s eyes opened as she coughed, rolling over.  </p><p>“You need to eat,” Carina said, helping her sit up, “And then, if you want to skip the neb, we are going to go sit in the bathroom with some steam.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, rubbing her eyes as she took the soup.  </p><p>“I just wish this fever would break,” Maya said, taking a bite of soup.  </p><p>“I know,” Carina said, frowning, “Hopefully soon.”  </p><p>Maya ate her dinner before Carina pulled her out of bed, sitting her down on the floor of the bathroom before turning on the shower.  </p><p>“Just relax,” Carina said, pulling off Maya’s shirt to keep her temp from getting too high.  </p><p>Carina sat down next to Maya, the blonde resting her head on her wife’s shoulder.  </p><p>“I don’t feel good,” Maya said, coughing as she sat there.  </p><p>“I’m sorry Bambina,” Carina said, wrapping her arm around her wife, “After this, you are going to take some meds and then sleep.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, letting her eyes shut as they sat there. </p><p> Twenty minutes later, Carina got Maya up, helping her into some clean pajamas before giving her some medicine and tucking her into bed.  Carina checked on the babies one more time before getting into bed herself, hoping that soon, this illness would leave their house.  </p><p>The next day, Maya spent the entire day in bed, sleeping for most of it.  </p><p>After Carina put the girls down for the night, she went to check on Maya.  She was worried because she had to work the next day, and while the girls were feeling much better, they still had barky coughs, and she didn’t want to send them to daycare like that.  However, if Maya was still this sick, there was no way she would be able to leave the girls home.  </p><p>Carina walked into the bedroom, finding Maya sound asleep and drenched in sweat.  She walked over to the bed, leaning down and kissing her forehead, glad it was now cool if extremely damp. </p><p> “Bambina,” Carina said, rubbing Maya’s back, “Wake up.”  </p><p>“Car,” Maya said, waking up as she started coughing, “Oh, did my fever break?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, brushing a piece of wet hair off Maya’s forehead, “Are you feeling up to a shower or do you want a bath?” </p><p> “Shower,” Maya said, sitting up, “Are the girls already in bed?”  </p><p>“Si,” Carina nodded, “I was going to bring them in here before I put them down, but Nora was fussy, and they both just needed to sleep.”  </p><p>“It’s ok,” Maya said, rubbing her eyes, “I just feel bad I’ve been so absent the past couple days.” </p><p> “Bambina, you have been so sick,” Carina said, “You did what you needed to to get better.  And it worked, apparently, although that cough still sounds bad.”  </p><p>“A cough, I can handle,” Maya said, getting up, “The fever was the thing that was killing me.  I took it earlier when I woke up and it was over 104.”  </p><p>“Bambina, you should have told me,” Carina said, “A temperature that high is dangerous.”  </p><p>“I’m fine now,” Maya said, shrugging.  </p><p>“Well, let’s get you in the shower,” Carina said, guiding her into the bathroom.  </p><p>“Will you join me?” Maya asked, just wanting to feel close to her wife.  </p><p>“Of course,” Carina nodded, both of them undressing before stepping into the hot spray, Carina helping Maya wash away all the grim from being sick.  </p><p>Maya was still coughing quite a bit which Carina didn’t love. </p><p> “I think you need another breathing treatment,” Carina said as Maya struggled with her cough, “I know it makes you feel bad, but your lungs do not sound good right now.”  </p><p>“Fine,” Maya nodded as they got out of the shower.  </p><p>“I am going to change the sheets on the bed,” Carina said as they pulled on their pajamas, “But first, I am going to get you some meds.”  </p><p>Soon enough, Maya was on the neb and Carina was getting the sheets changed.  Once that was done, Carina went downstairs, getting Maya water and some pasta.  </p><p>“Thanks Babe,” Maya said, taking what Carina handed her, “I always forget how hungry I am after sweating out a fever.”  </p><p>“Well, you have barely eaten in the past week so that is probably also part of it,” Carina laughed a little, “I am glad to see you with an appetite again though.”  </p><p>“I still can’t believe we all got so sick,” Maya said, rubbing her eyes, “Watching the girls feel so bad was terrible.  I would be twice as sick for three times as long if they never got sick again.”  </p><p>“They are going to get sick again,” Carina said, shaking her head, “They are kids in daycare.  It’s going to happen.  But I agree, it was so hard seeing them like that.  Also, I now understand why Amelia and Teddy complain so much about daycare viruses.” </p><p> “Me too,” Maya said, “This is the sickest I have been in so long.”  </p><p>“Me too,” Carina said, nodded, “Oh, I have work tomorrow.  I can put the twins in daycare if you aren’t feeling up to watching them.”  </p><p>“No,” Maya said, shaking her head, “I can watch them.  I heard Nora when I was awake earlier.  She still sounds bad.” </p><p> “The croup cough can last a while,” Carina said, nodding, “They are breathing just fine, but if you are up to it, I think daycare would be much happier if we don’t take them back just yet.” </p><p> “I think I’ll be fine to keep them home with me,” Maya said, “I have missed them the past few days, and I am going to have to work a lot of overtime to catch up on everything.  I need to go back to work the day after tomorrow.”  </p><p>“Don’t push too hard,” Carina said, “Your lungs still don’t sound good.”  </p><p>“I won’t go out to any scenes,” Maya said, “But paperwork is probably something my lungs can handle.”  </p><p>“I’d say that is probably true,” Carina nodded, “But if you want to do any of this, we need to get some sleep.  Are you feeling better from the neb?”  </p><p>“Kinda,” Maya said, “Although sleeping all day is probably not going to make it easy tonight.”</p><p>  “How about some NyQuil?” Carina said, “Just to help for tonight.”  </p><p>Maya nodded, knowing the only way she was going to finish getting over this was to sleep.  Once Maya was medicated and they were both ready, they climbed into bed. </p><p> “I am glad you are feeling better Bambina,” Carina said, pressing a kiss to Maya’s lips.  </p><p>“Me too,” Maya said, smiling at her wife, “And hopefully, we can avoid another situation like this for a long time.”  </p><p>“Yes,” Carina said, laughing, “That would be good.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>What did you think?  If you ever have any Marina prompts, either for this story, or from something else, let me know! Thanks so much for reading, commenting, and leaving kudos!</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>So originally, this was just going to be a one shot of just this chapter, but then I kept going so this is going be be the story of how Maya and Carina become moms.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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